Title: The Mysterious Package
Author: Chris Santi
Beta: JulyFalconeri
Rating: T
Warning: Slight sexual theme
Spoilers: None
Pairing: None
Word count: 333

Disclaimer: I do not own Family Guy and made no profit from this work.
A/N: Please enjoy and reveiw!

"Meg!" Exclaimed Peter. "What did you do with my shirt?"

"Yeah, like I would need your shirt," said Meg.

"Well it didn't get up and walk away."

"Well why do you yell at me, fat ass!"

Lois, who had been listening to the conversation from the kitchen, walked over to Peter and Meg.

"Now, now, we can fix this," said Lois.

"No, we can't!" said Peter with a tear forming in his eye.

Peter ran out of the house. Meg and Lois had started to leave the room when they heard the doorbell. They rushed to the door only to see that no one was there, but rather a package on the doorstep.

"Who could it be from?" asked Meg.

"What could it possibly be?" questioned Lois.

They started to rip open the package only to find nothing but a piece of cardboard. It was in a perfect circle.

"Why would someone send them a package with cardboard?"Questioned Meg to herself.

Stewie sat in his highchair waiting to be fed by Lois, but he was growing impatient. "Lois, I've grown tired of you sitting there not paying attention to the baby who hasn't ate lunch. Do you want me to kill you? Do you want me to break your neck?" asked Stewie.

"Mommy will be right there Stewie, but I have to figure out what this is for," said Lois.

"GIGGITY!" yelled Quagmire walking in uninvited. "Hey Lois, I see you got my package, so what do ya think?"

"Why did you send us cardboard, Mr. Quagmire?" asked Meg.

"Turn it over and read it," said Quagmire.

"Oh," said Meg and Lois in perfect unison.

They turned it over and started to read:

Dear Lois, if you read this, I banged 20 chicks in one night. Giggity giggity, OH!
Your good friend,
Quagmire

"Great, isn't it?" asked Quagmire, childlike glee in his voice.

"Yeah, that's... really something," said Lois. But Lois was talking to air. Quagmire was already gone.

"LOIS! I'M HUNGRY!"

Thanks for reading! Please reveiw.

~Chris Santi