I own nothing, but the song Puck sings to Santana. The song is the product of a guitar in my lap, vodka & Redbull in my hand, and friends who kept getting me refills. As it turns out I really liked the song.

Santana had been moping around for weeks. She'd been avoiding everyone except in glee where she kept to herself and would only sing songs by Coldplay. She had allowed Brittany to come over a couple times, but kept her distance from the blonde. Brittany didn't understand why Santana wouldn't kiss her anymore.

"B, I just can't," Santana said curled up on her side of the bed, "It hurts way too much."

"But you always said my kisses make you feel better," Brittany pouted, watching Santana.

Santana shook her head, "If I can't have you…all of you…then I can't have any of you." Santana sighed and shook her head. That even confused her. "Can we just watch a movie?"

The blonde nodded, disappointed. She looked at the pillow under her. She was struggling for something to say because she wanted Santana to talk to her. "Puck's writing a song about you."

"Wha-" Santana furrowed her eyebrows, "Why? I thought he was with Lauren."

Brittany trailed her finger along the comforter in a circle around herself, "Because Mr. Schue told us that if we had an idea for a song then we could sing it in glee…and you're sad. He thought it would help."

"How do you know about it?" Santana asked. Although she and Puck had had their differences, he turned out to be a good friend. The night after Brittany told her she couldn't be with her, Santana showed up at Puck's house (she still wasn't sure why) and they both drank until Santana was sobbing on his shoulder. She didn't quite remember what she told him, but he's been a sympathetic ear to her ever since.

"He asked if I wanted to help," Brittany shrugged.

Santana laid down all the way, stretched out on her stomach. She put her hands under her pillow, "Did you?"

A small nod came from the blonde. She let out a smile, "Some parts are kinda funny and some parts are sad. Some of them are mean too," she frowned, "but Puck said that it's his verse he can write what he wants."

Santana closed her eyes. Brittany's expressions were always a point of focus for Santana. She could see every one of them in her head. She had no idea what possessed her to agree to Brittany coming over…well she did know what possessed her to do it. She was just disappointed that her love of the blonde had overridden her self-preservation and common sense. There was a dull ache in her chest whenever Brittany was around and she desperately wanted it to go away, but she couldn't stop herself seeing Brittany. She wanted to be around her all the time just like before. She wanted to hold her and kiss her and tell her that she loved her.

It hurt because she knew she couldn't- she shouldn't. It would be incredibly easy just to scoot over and kiss Brittany, slipping back into old habits.

Santana looked down at her newly done nails. Her mom had sent her to the spa after she had moped around the house two weekends in a row, something completely unheard of for Santana. "Did you tell…" Santana pause. She hated saying his name. Every time she saw him she wanted to throw up and if she said his name she was sure she'd either cry or throw up. "him…about what I said?"

"Puck or Artie?" Brittany asked.

Santana visibly cringed at the name. She squeezed her eyes shut. "The second one."

"No," Brittany shook her head.

"Why not?" she asked back, dreading the answer.

The dancer laid down on the bed, on her side facing Santana, "Because…I didn't know if you wanted me to tell anyone and I feel like…it's special. To me anyway. I don't want to have to share it….I want it to be mine."

Santana studied Brittany for a few seconds before she let out a sigh. Why did Brittany have to be so sweet without realizing it? She closed her eyes again and tried to think of being somewhere else. In the gym running suicides for Coach Sylvester….but of course Brittany was always there and her legs were always glistening with the post workout sweat. Her long, lean, smooth… Santana shook her head into the pillow. She really needed to get Brittany out of her system. If only she really wanted Brittany out of her system.

"San?" Brittany asked.

"Hmm?" Santana asked back, not even opening her eyes.

"I was just seeing if you were still awake."

"Yeah, I'm still awake….barely."

Every muscle in Santana's body tensed when she felt Brittany's fingers running through her hair. She reached up and stopped the hand, wrapping her fingers around Brittany's wrist. She hadn't touched Brittany in so long she forgot how easily the blonde affected her. "Please, Brit…just don't…"

"But I want to touch you," Brittany frowned, pushing up into a seated position, "It's not fair."

Santana scoffed, "Seriously?" She opened her eyes and sat up.

"Yes," Brittany stated firmly, "I want to touch you. Why can't I?"

"I already told you," Santana took a deep breath.

The blonde took Santana's hand, fighting Santana to keep it in her possession. Finally Santana gave up and let Brittany gently stroke her hand, up and down and across her knuckles.

Tears were already misting Santana's eyes. She choked out, "Break up with Artie."

Brittany sighed. She knew that was coming. Being Brittany, she didn't want to hurt anyone, but she knew she'd effectively crushed Santana. Brittany whispered, pulling Santana's body into hers, "I love you."

Santana let Brittany hold her for a few minutes, as she tried to choke back tears. She could feel Brittany showering her face and head with kisses, which only served to make her lose her hold on the tears. She wrapped her arms around Brittany who gently laid them down.

Santana was at the end of her rope. She would quite literally do anything to be with Brittany. She would lie, cheat and steal (although that was a normal weekday for her). She tried to think of all the things she could do to get Brittany to leave Artie for her. She even contemplated a very elaborate kidnapping that would leave Artie in Tijuana and Brittany free to date.

"What would it take for you to break up with Artie?" Santana whispered against Brittany's neck, "I need to be with you."

Tears stung the back of Brittany's eyes. Seeing Santana that vulnerable and depressed was horrifying. She answered honestly and gently squeezed Santana, "I don't know."

They fell asleep like that in the silence of Santana's room. When Brittany woke up, she found that Santana had already left for school, leaving her a note that told her to remember her jacket because it was going to be chilly.

Santana's day came and went the same way it always did. Blurry and uninteresting. She drug her feet to each class and got to glee first so she could sit in the back and torture herself by watching Brittany and Artie together.

Puck walked in with his guitar in one hand and Lauren's hand in the other. They were laughing about something that was undoubtedly weird or slightly mean. When Puck saw Santana he hitched his chin with a friendly smile and Santana nodded remembering the song that Brittany said he wrote for her.

She was a little worried about the song. He wrote her a song before and by he was halfway through the first verse, Santana was sure he just took a story from Playboy and put it to music.

When everyone assembled, Puck set up his stuff and waited for Mr. Schue to introduce him. He sat on a stool and looked up at Santana, "We all know you're kinda depressed and some of us know about it more than others so…I hope this will make you smile. Mike, Brittany, Rachel, and I worked really hard on it."

Santana looked questioningly at Rachel. That sorta surprised her. The shorter girl just shot her a sweet, hopeful smile. Santana couldn't bring herself to smile back so she let out a nod, acknowledging the girl.

"I thought about it last night and I think Rachel and Brit should sing back up on the chorus so if you girls could grab a chair or whatever," Puck started tuning his guitar.

Rachel immediately got up and joined Puck, but Brittany seemed hesitant. She hadn't seen Santana all day, much less talked to her. And this song could cause some problems between her and Artie. She glanced up at Santana who looked less depressed than she had in days and she knew she had to sing it. If it would help make Santana happy, she'd risk it.

Puck started playing some chords. The song sounded light and fun. He added, "Before I start I'd like to apologize…to…well you'll figure out who you are when I sing it." His eyes were on Artie who of course knew it was going to be mean to him.

Puck played a few more chords before starting to sing.

Shoving Artie down the stairs
Showing Brittany that she cares
Strutting up and down the hall
Shoplifting from the mall

She's got it going on.
Yeah she's got it going on.

A smile broke out across Santana's face for the first time in a really, really long time.

But when you stop and you stare
You'll see she's not there
And the tears in her eyes
Yeah they'll make you wonder why

Wonder why

She needs to let us all in
Except maybe Finn
Cause we make her laugh and smile
For a while.

That part brought tears to her eyes. They were right in the verses and she could feel that they were reaching out to her. She felt Quinn take her hand and gently squeeze it, trying to convey some support for whatever she thought was wrong.

She's got the sharpest of tongues
Couldn't tell that she's numb
'Cause she's broken and she's bruised
She's been tortured and used

Her eyes had been on Puck the whole time because he had been singing directly to her, but she chanced a glance at Brittany who looked slightly nervous. She wouldn't have noticed if she hadn't know all of Brittany's expressions intimately.

Someday we'll look her up
While they're getting her close up
There will be no more tears
We'll have to even call her.. Mrs. Pierce

Santana's mouth dropped open. She definitely had not expected that. Her eyes shot from Rachel who was beaming at her to Brittany who had a small smile resting on her lips. The blonde was swaying on her stood with the music and finally looked up at Santana.

The simple stared made Santana's heart race. She felt like it might explode because she could see all the love that populated Brittany's heart pour out through their gaze.

She's beautiful
She's smart
She's got a whole lotta love
In her guarded heart.

Santana.

The rest of the glee club clapped and Santana made her way down to Puck to give him a tearful hug. He put his strong hands on her bad, "I'm glad you liked it. I was scared you be pissed because of the first verse…and the Mrs. Pierce thing."

She shook her head against his chest. "It was awesome. You should totally record it though so I can put it on my iPod."

He chuckled and nodded, "I can totally do that."

Rachel appeared next to Santana. She folded her hands in front of her plaid skirt and tentatively looked up at Santana, "I just wanted you to know that if you ever wanted to talk about…your situation…I understand." She glanced at Finn who was still pondering his inclusion in the lyrics.

Santana nodded, "Thanks Berry." She took a deep breath and did something she was sure she'd never ever do. She gave Rachel a hug.

Rachel smiled and accepted the hug. "You're welcome."

When the hug ended, everyone was staring at them. Santana rolled her eyes. "I'm seriously trying to be nicer to you guys, but if you're going to look at me weird every time I do it then forget it."

Quinn smiled, "Sorry. We're just not used to seeing you…you know as a human."

Santana knew it was a playful jab and she smiled back Quinn. The whole group left their chairs and milled around the white tiled floors, talking about the song and how it was cute and sad, but they couldn't use it for Regionals because of the Artie part.

Speaking of Artie…Santana looked around and saw that Brittany was sitting on the stool behind the drum kit talking to Artie who was right next to her. Neither one of them looked particularly happy. In fact, Artie looked downright pissed. She knew Brittany was trying to explain something, but he kept shaking his head.

Santana started to walk over there to make sure Artie wasn't being mean, but she saw Puck make his way over. He shook his head at Artie a few times and gestured toward Brittany. The blonde had the drumsticks in her hand and was tapping out a beat on her leg as she listening to the conversation between the two boys. Santana knew she was listening because Brittany had a look of concentration on her face that wasn't on the easy beat on her leg.

"Hey S," Quinn gently put her hand on Santana's forearm, stealing her attention.

Santana turned around and looked at Quinn, "Hmm?"

"I just wanted to let you know that…" Quinn paused, gathering all the right words and discarding any hurtful ones, "If you ever wanna talk or like…hang out after school or something…it's be nice."

Santana let out a smile at Quinn's offer, "Thanks Q. I was actually going to go see a movie later…if you wanted to come."

"Sounds good," Quinn nodded, "Then afterwards maybe you can come with me to look at prom dresses. I kinda really wanted to take you with me because I know you won't lie to me about how they look."

Santana chuckled. No she definitely wouldn't lie to Quinn about something as important as how she looked, "Awesome. I'll get my stuff out of my locker and we can get out of here."

"I'll meet you at your locker," Quinn offered, "My stuff if over there." She pointed at the chairs.

Santana said her goodbyes to everyone and let Rachel hug her one more time before making her way to the door. She glanced back at Brittany. She was surprised that Brittany was watching her with a disappointed look on her face. Santana paused at the door and rested her hand on the doorframe. She let out a small smile to the blonde and mouthed 'thank you.'

Brittany mirrored her smile and mouthed back, 'come over?'

Santana felt her palms start to get clammy. She swallowed hard and looked at her watch. She calculated the time it would take to see a movie and get Quinn through all the dresses in the mall. Santana sighed and shrugged back at Brittany offering an unsure, 'maybe'.

The blonde looked crestfallen and her eyes went to the snare drum in front of her. Santana waited at the door until Brittany looked at her again. She couldn't stand for Brittany to be sad, especially because of her. When she caught the blue eyes again, she held up ten fingers. That was the time the mall closed so she could sneak into Brittany's window like she'd done millions of times before even though this time there would be no sweet lady kisses. Santana didn't think she could handle that now that everything was out in the open.

Brittany let out a million-watt smile and waved at her.

"Did you get your stuff?" Quinn asked, walking up behind Santana. Her eyes followed Santana's before gently pushing the other girl out the door. "You have a problem."

"Don't I know it," Santana started walking down the hallway with Quinn next to her.