The Hard Working Life of the Gundam Girls - the Sequel!!
By: Yasashii the agressive kitsune

Discalimer: Let's think logically here. If I owned this series, would I write fanfiction about it? Hm....for those of you who don't think logically(you should all know who you are), your guess is as good as mine.

NOTE: Before I either entertain you or freak you out, this is a little note to say that this story shouldn't have too much yaoi or yuri or anything... I think. And I happen to think that Relena bashing is fun, so if you like her... now would be the time to flee clutching your Relena plushie. Swearing is present in this fic, not like that's a surprise. Also a little note to say that I HAVEN'T DROPPED OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH!! I'm still writing away! Enjoy my newest sugar high!
~Yasashii ;)
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Chapter One - Flight of Chaos

As night falls, the international airport makes a stark contrast against the soft sunset hues of the sky. As always, the airport is bustling with people and the excitement of travel as planes take off and land. Of course, if you happen to work in an airport, you tend to see things a bit differently. Noisy cars coming and going while plugging up traffic, helping nearly or completely clueless people find their way around, the yelling and screaming of extremely angry and/or happy people, and having a crazy work schedule. All for the low low price of extreme fatigue! The flight attendants especially see it this way, what with oddball flight charts and such. One woman in particular is seen sleeping in an office not far away. Her wheat colored hair draped about her down turned face in a curtain while she uses her arms as a makeshift pillow. The little flight attendant hat she usually wore is crumpled up in her lap as she dreams about stalking the love of her life.....

Relena: (mumbling in her sleep) Heeeeeeeeeroooooooo.....

Unbeknownst to our exhausted flight attendant, she was about to receive quite a rude awakening.

Freaky Person Outside the Office: (BAM! BAM! BAM!!) PEACECRAAAAFT!!! Get your lazy ass in gear for your next flight!

Relena's startled blue eyes flip open and she hastily shoves her hat on her head. Smoothing out her short navy blue skirt, she quickly opens the door to reveal a not so very happy boss...Otto.

Relena: Yes, sir!! Right away, sir!(gathers all her things together)

Otto: God dammit, Peacecraft! Were you sleeping on the job again?!

Relena: Gomen nasai! I was out late last night...(no way in Hell she was gonna tell him that she spent the night sitting on a roof with binoculars watching Heero........ again)

Otto: This flight has lots of important people on it... rich people. You have to do your job perfectly and make them ALL comfortable!! Or...(makes a slitting action across his throat)

Relena: I - I understand, sir!(scoots past him and out the door)

As the young underpaid girl scurries down the halls, she sees many familiar and unfamiliar faces. As she nears her next flight, she looks to the gate and does a double take. Did she just see a long braid by the entrance? As quickly as she had spotted it, it was gone.

Relena: I really need a cup of coffee.(she makes her way to the plane, stopping momentarily to wave to her brother, who is being ogled by many crazy women)

As she reaches the back room, Relena trips over a pencil conveniently laying in the doorway and lands face first into a container of airline peanuts. The rest of the staff glower at her momentarily before continuing their activities. Right before the plane took off, Relena successfully demonstrated all of the emergency equipment without falling asleep and/or falling over. It was soon time to serve the airline food, which I'm sure everyone could live without.

Relena:(pushing her little food cart that has smileys painted all over it) This had better go well...(what a poor misguided soul...*authoress has evil grin plastered on her face*)

Up ahead, she sees a familiar braid accompanied by a just as familiar ponytail. She is so shocked to see them that she bumps her cart against the back of someone's chair, spilling grape fruit juice all over her uniform. She only stares as she listens to them speaking while they are watching the in-flight movie, Homeward Bound:The Incredible Journey.

Duo:(munching on airline peanuts and casually points at the screen) You know those animals aren't really talking, right Wu-man?

Wufei:(smacks the braided one upside the head) Baka! Quit spoiling it for everybody else!

Relena: Oooooooooooooookaaaaaayyyyyy.....(the plane tilts uncomfortably to the side. Relena falls over and her cart topples onto her) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! Why, of all the nerve!

Being the sensible, peace-loving girl she is, she stalks up to the pilot's cabin and pounds on the door.

Relena: Just what the fuck do you think you're doing in there!?

Relena shoves the door open to reveal the pilots hunched over a crossword puzzle. The co-pilot looks up at Relena and grins sheepishly while the main pilot has his brow furrowed in concentration.

Pilot: Hmmmmmmmm........the capital of Okalahoma...what WAS that?!

Relena: (sweatdrops) Uhhh...who's flying the plane??

Pilot: (looks confused for a minute and then smiles) Oh, don't worry! It's on auto pilot!(gives her a goofy thumbs-up sign)

Horrified, Relena covers her eyes with one hand while slowly backing out of the cockpit, pretending she hadn't seen or heard anything. She closes the door and takes a shaky breath.

Relena: I didn't see that, I didn't see that, I didn't see that....we're doomed! (sniff sniff)Waitaminute....(sniffs again and uncovers her eyes) That smells like.....SMOKE!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!(runs willy nilly around the plane) Where the Hell is it coming from?!(makes her way more carefully through the plane and finally finds the source...) DUO!!!!!!!

Duo is sitting cross legged in his seat with his tray down. The tray has a black cloth tossed over it and several candles sit atop it. Startled, Duo clutches his ever present cross and looks up irritatingly at Relena.

Duo: Can't you see that I'm trying to conduct a seance here?!

Relena: You can't do that on a plane!!

Duo: Show me where it specifically says that I can't have a seance on a plane!

Relena: Well..urm..I'm sure that the people who made the rule book didn't think that they'd have ot put THAT in it! It's kind of obvious!

Duo:(folds arms defiantly)

Relena: Sorry, but I'm gonna have to put these candles out.(leans over to blow them out when she suddenly hears strange noises coming from the bathroom)

Person in the Bathroom:(moaning and groaning)

Relena:(sweatdrops) What the Hell..?

Person in the Bathroom: Ohhhhhhhhhh...yes...yes...YES!!(the bathroom door flings open revealing...Quatre)

Relena:(face turns blue) What was he DOING?!?!

Quatre fluffs his luxuriant hair and makes to walk past Relena when he drops the small satchel he had been carrying with him. A small bottle rolls out of the satchel. It's....an Herbal Essences shampoo bottle. Relena facevaults(what did you all think he was doing, you hentais!?). Unfortunately, she facevaulted right onto a candle and her hair is immediately set ablaze.

Relena: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! Help meeeeeeeee!!(she hurriedly grabs a water bottle and empties the contents onto her head)

Suddenly, the plane tilts dangerously to the side and Relena looks out the window. She then sees that the wing is now missing and promptly freaks out. She rushes back to the cockpit again and stumbles in upon the pilots playing chess.

Relena: What do you think you're doing now?! You have to fly this plane before we all crash and DIE!(the plane jerks violently and the pilot's head bashes downward..... his forehead gets impaled by a chess piece) EEK!(watches disgustingly as blood begins to seep out onto the chess board) Okay..ummmmmm...(sees that the co-pilot has also met his demise, having slammed into the window behind him) I have to save everyone!(goes out of the cabin to inform everyone of the crisis at hand and....no one is there?) ACK! Where'd everybody go?!

Relena rushes back to the cockpit once more to find that the dead pilots are also gone. There aren't even any bloodstains. Forgetting the wildly out of control plane, Relena confusedly begins examining the cabin for any indication that humans had been there. Suddenly, she feels a tap on her shoulder and she whirls around to see a demonically grinning Heero Yuy. The other four boys are standing behind him with equally insane expressions on their faces.

Heero: Omae o korosu, Relena.

Duo:(pumps a fist into the air) FINALLY!!!

Relena: What are you talking about? You're gonna crash with me! And all of the passengers... what did you do to them?!

Heero:(snorts)There were never any passengers. It was all an illusion so we could kill you without harming civilians(holds up little illusion-making device). As for us, we have parachutes...sayonara!(he and the others jump out a window)

Relena:(sits on the floor) Well..there goes my job...wait.(stands up) He went through all of this just to kill me? He MUST love meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..........(plummets to the earth with a gratifying crash)

The psychotic giggling of a spandex-clad boy echoes in the distance....


....(announcing like Porky Pig)That's all folks!


I know you're all wondering...when will I get off my lazy ass again to write the next chapter? I honestly don't know...when I get bored. That could be really soon, considering school and all...blah. Or you could be wishing that I had never been born...if that is the case, then I'll make sure to put you on my haunting list for the afterlife. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!
~Yasashii ;)