Leafpool Speaks: Forgotten
He let me forgot me. Crowfeather, he thinks that he can get another mate in his clan and call it good? I tried to tell him I was having his kits but he wouldn't listen, one day he`ll regret that choice. I hope that he`s happy with Nightcloud, apparently she`s having his kits to. How could he do this to me? Does he really care for that stupid old that's in his clan? I guess I will never know. Crowfeather is a thing in my past, but why can I not stop thinking about him? I looked out across the moors and over the lake. Somewhere in those moors is the Windclan camp and there the cat that fathered my unborn kits. It would soon be noticeable, how would I hide till they were born and then how would I keep it a secret from the other clans and my own clan. Perhaps I should just come clean. Tell them everything, just hope they understand. Could I really do that? No, this must be a secret. I thought. Even if I tell them, would they understand, I mean I would get glares and cats would whisper about me. Firestar would not exilehis only Medicine Cat and daughter. Even if I told them, when I was worried about the kits, who would look after the clan? Brightheart, she knows basic herbs. But that would only last so long. Maybe… no, I could never get in Squirrelflight`s way like that. Besides eventually Squirrelflight`s going to have Brambleclaw`s kits, I shouldn't get in the way. I should head back to camp.
~That Night~
I tossed and turned in the Med. Cat den. I couldn't get the kits and Crowfeather out of my mind. At last I had to choose, the only thing it seemed I could do is give them to Squirrelflight and she would bring them up as her`s. I got up padded over to the Warriors Den and looked for Squirrelflight.
"Squirrelflight, get up," I whispered in Squirrelflight`s ear.
"UUgg, dawn patrol already, I was about to catch that blasted rabbit that gets away every night," Squirrelflight growled. "And yet I always know it's the same rabbit."
I purred in amusement. "Squirrelflight I need to talk to you alone," I meowed.
"Ok," Squirrelflight meowed. "Let's go out into the forest."
~Out in the Forest Somewhere~
"Ok, what's up?" Squirrelflight asked, still a little sleepy.
"Squirrelflight, I`m expecting Crowfeather`s kits," I stated quickly and expecting a outburst from Squirrelflight.
Squirrelflight`s eyes went from sleepy, to anger, to shock and then stopped at a mixture shocked, disbelieving and anger.
"Leafpool, what, how? When? How are you going to tell the clan?" Squrrelflight bursted out in questions.
"I wasn't going to. I was wondering if you would bring them up as yours and Brambleclaws," I meowed.
"But I could never lie to him like that," Squirrelflight meowed.
"Tell him then," I meowed. "Tell him there mine, just whatever it takes."
"He would never approve," Squirrelflight said. "Fine I won't tell, him, not anybody."
"Thank you Squirrelflight, this mean a lot to me," I said pleased.
"You're my sister, what kind of sister would I be if I didn't stick out for you," Squirrelflight said. "Now let`s go back to camp, I have dawn patrol and I want to get more sleep before that." With that Squirrelflight headed back to camp. I looked at her go, unsure if I did the right thing. Starclan, please tell me I did the right thing.