Chapter 1:
Kate's POV:
Castle knelt down, "Katherine Houghton Beckett, will you marry me?"
The first emotion that crossed through me was relief. He wasn't breaking up with me! But quickly after, panic crashed down on me. Did I want to marry him? Did I want to MARRY HIM? We'd only been dating for a year. It was too soon. But still, I'd been in love with him for almost four, and it felt so right.
"Kate?" he stood up.
"I... Umm..." I couldn't find any words. So many thoughts raced through my mind. I wanted to go to DC. That was the only thing I'd decided previously. My job at the NYPD was amazing, comfortable, and exactly what I'd needed for the past 10 years. But it was time to move on, the train was leaving, and I wasn't going to make Castle buy a ticket.
"I got the job in DC," I mumbled, solemnly.
"What?" he strained to hear.
"I got the job, Rick!" I was close to a shout. "And I'm going to take it."
"That's..." I could tell he was struggling with what to say. "That's amazing."
I looked up, flustered. "What?"
"I didn't ask you to marry me to keep you here, Kate. I asked you because I can't imagine my life without you."
I realized he didn't care that I was going. He still wanted to be with me. He wanted to MARRY me. I wrapped my hands around his neck and kissed him.
He pulled away after a few seconds and said, "Is that a yes?"
My smile fell. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to make him come with me. I couldn't do that to Alexis and Martha. But I couldn't do long distance. It would stress me out and distract me from my job. If I broke up with him, though, it would probably take years to get over him. The couple of seconds I'd spent deliberating felt like days. The silence was scratching away at me, and I couldn't take it. There was only one thing to do, whether or not I would regret it later.
"I... I can't Rick." I saw his face drop, and my heart split into a million pieces. "I'm so sorry."
And with that, I ran out of the park. I could faintly hear Castle yelling, "Kate! Hold on!" but it was too late. I couldn't go back on my decision. I got into my car and let myself go. I almost choked on the first sob, and once it came out, I couldn't stop. A river of tears flowed out of my eyes and I buried my head in my arms. Later I would be thankful that I hadn't parked next to Castle so he couldn't find me, but right then it was the last thing in my mind. I was hyperventilating and I couldn't have stopped if I'd wanted to. What have I done, I thought. So I curled up on the seat and drowned all other noise out with my tears as the world imploded on me.