chapter 1: Beautiful Lullabies
"Let me go!" I said as sternly as I could, Merle didn't fall for my tough girl act. "Alright alright darlin! I ain't gon hurt ya or nothing like that! I jus like seein a girl like you parading around here in your short shorts and converse! Ya know I never thought I'd even be interested in a girl like you with your screaming music and all" Merle said. "Merle" I sighed "I have to go." I began to walk off. "Ok I'll see ya round darlin" Merle watched me the whole way. Merle always made me uneasy... Getting under my skin the way he does, always showing up at the weirdest moments. If Rick or any of the others caught him even looking at me they would have him killed.
I walked into my cell and immediately heard Judith's soft cooing, so innocent. "Hi there Judy" I pulled her out of her makeshift crib and held her in my arms slowly rocking her back and fourth. For some reason I could still feel the way Merle held me against him just a few minutes ago and I couldn't help but think about it. I quickly dismissed it from my mind. "How is Judy?" Carol tapped on the door of my cell. She noticed I was a little shaken up and obviously had something on my mind "every thing ok Sam?" She asked walking in and sitting down next to me. "Yeah, yeah every things fine... Just a little tired is all. Haven't gotten much sleep with Judith around." I said. "Oh... Hun, let me take her tonight so you can get some rest, you need it." Carol stood up not giving me time to protest, she took Judy in one hand and the crib in the other. I looked up at her "thanks" I smiled and curled up on my bed.
I woke up surrounded by complete darkness, I had no idea what time it was. My mouth was so dry, I stood up and slid on my shoes. I crept out of my room and into the cafeteria, but not before passing Merle's cell. The whole way I held me breath praying to god he wouldn't hear me. I grabbed a plastic cup off the counter and poured some water out of a large jug what was sitting on the top shelf. I crept back to my room as silent as I could, but not silent enough because a few minutes later there came Merle wearing his white tank top and a black button-up shirt,unbuttoned. You look at Merle and see a nasty old redneck and then you look at me...a creepy "rocker emo" girl. I had on my blue jean shorts and my black Metallica t-shirt. I had long black hair bright blue eyes, and pale skin, nothin like Merle at all. That's why I was so confused on why he was so interested in me. "Hey darlin" Merle walked in with out warning. I looked up at him and half smiled notifying him that I wasn't in the mood for crap. "Awh! Don't be like that! I just wanna come say hey...how's about we go for a walk, jus me and you girly?" Merle asked. "What if I get caught or something?" I said "then you jus get caught girl, what they gon do? Kill ya for hanging out with me?" Merle had a point. "Ok... But not for long." I said. He held out his hand, I didn't take it.
We walked out side and Merle led me around to were the cars were "where are we going?" I asked. "You'll see sweetheart" we walked until we got to an old army truck, the back was open and there were boxes piled up "this is where I go to get away from you guys" Merle said. "Even me?" Merle helped me up and we both sat down next to each other, he put his hand on my thigh, sending cold chills up my spine. "No, not you girly." He said, a grin spreading across his face. I pushed his hand away "what's the matter darlin?" He asked. "Nothin...I just don't like bein touched." I said.
"Ya ever smoked?" Merle pulled out a pack of cigarettes, I shook my head. "Ya wanna?" He asked, I shook my head again. "You know you do!" Merle said lighting it. I shook my head once more. He held the cigarette up to my mouth. "Merle...I said no." "Fine" Merle smoked the cigarette. After a few moments in silence Merle looked up at me. "Yes?" I asked. "I heard ya singin the other day, ya wanna song fer me?" He asked. "Not really Merle." I mumbled. "Please just a little bit?" He asked. "Ok..." I looked at him nervous and began sing "when I was a young boy my father took me into the city to see a marching band. He said son when you grow up will you be the savor of the broken, the beaten and the damned. He said will you defeat them your demons and all the non-believers the plans that they have made because one day I'll leave you a phantom to lead you in the summer to join the black parade..."
Merle pressed his lips together "beautiful!" He said. I rolled my eyes grinning. "Merle...I like this side of you, the side of your that's cool. Not perverted and stuff, I don't get why the others don't like you" I said. Merle didn't say any thing, he scooted closer to me, the closest he could possibly get. "You tired sweetheart? It's like 2 am" he said. "Kinda... But it's fi-" Merle put his arm around me long enough to put my head on his shoulder with his hand, then he took his arm away. "You can keep it there..." I said shyly. Merle looked at me shocked, then put his arm back around me. I leaned my head on his shoulder, it felt so wrong but so right. I wasn't sure if I liked it.