Confessions of a Pokemaniac

I will travel across the land searching far and wide

Each pokemon to understand the power that's inside.

"I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was"

I remember hearing those eleven words every weekday morning before I left for the bus every morning back in sixth grade. Every day I sang along. Every day I recited the motto along with Team Rocket, and tried my very hardest to memorize the poke rap by heart. I loved that show with all my heart. Then I discovered the game, then the cards. God, I was in paradise.

Fast forward to eleventh grade. Now I sit in the courtyard with about five other people with my cards sitting proudly in front of me, all laid out, all ready to defend my life points, and I am ready to defend them and get the most exhilarating rush in the midst of battle. But what's this? The cards before me are not the memorable glistening holographic mew promo I held so dear. Instead the foreboding figures of Dark Necrofear and the card I just activated is not a Trainer card, but Judgment of Anubis. Gone are the blastoise, gone are the pikachu. I go into battle with new monsters of a whole new game with people who now scorn and mock the thing they once loved, the pokemon they too once adored as I say nothing and attack with Necrofear.

But, as soon as I get home I turn on the stereo, pop in 2 B a Master (the very first CD I ever owned) and sing my poke-lovin' heart out until I'm breathing heavy and my throat's raw. And if the neighbors hear me, I couldn't care less. I dash up the stairs to watch the electric mouse I watched for six years now unleash yet another electric attack, making Team Rocket blast off yet again, ending with the signature ding. I flip on the GBA and literally am on the edge of my seat, stomach in a knot to see if my precious mightyena, my last one left, one of my favorites will be knocked out and proudly show the V for victory as my opponent falls.

That's right, ladies and gents, I am a poke maniac. And chances are, if you're reading this in the pokemon section of ff.net, you are too.

What is it about the pokemon phenomenon that draws us ever closer to this magical universe where children can travel the world alone with nothing but an electric mouse at their side?

I remember once in seventh grade, not long after I had received my very first pokemon game (it was yellow version. I lost it years later and to this day I can't find it) I went to Florida for a funeral. While I was there I met an aunt who for some strange reason thought them evil. Absolutely appalled and dismayed at the thought that this wonderful thing could ever be denounced in such a manner, I took it upon myself to teach the ways of the pokemon. I didn't exactly get the complete message across, but I do think I made my point in the fact that pokemon in no way shape or form endorsed evil of any nature. (Unless you happen to follow the ways of Giovanni or something.)

I came home and was greatly relieved that Pokemon: The First Movie was still in theaters, I was scared out of my wits that I had missed it. I saw it and to this very day it's one of my favorite movies of all time. It was the first one in which I cried. I remember the first time I heard the score "Invitation to Danger" play as Ash and company braved the storm on the way to Mewtwo's island, I smiled with delight as I saw that adorable mew play on the windmill, and feel tears bud in my eyes as that poor pikachu tried again, and again to revive it's beloved trainer and how when he did not get up, began to cry. The first time I took to heart the words "The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are." I bought the soundtrack and later, the music score (which in my opinion is MUCH better) and am trying to find the Japanese soundtrack.

I remember trying my best not to scream in ecstatic joy when the eevee I'd been raising for so long finally, FINALLY evolved into my favorite pokemon of all time- umbreon. I remember my pride and joy collection of cards, ,dozens of holos of my personal favorites, all of the Topps cards, a few Digimon cards, and to top it all off, the adorable mew key chain I was so proud of. Then it got stolen. My friend's Digimon movie was taken too. I nearly cried. Not because of their materialistic value, but because those cards, though nothing more than pieces of paper and cardboard meant the world to me, my heart was in them. I loved them. And for them to just be pawned off like some everyday appliance- it was unthinkable. I'm still really ticked off about it. I miss my holo mew so very very much.

When my rabbit died, in the middle of the night, I grabbed 2 B a Master and played "The Time Has Come" through earphones and felt as if every word was written just for me.

I sit in bed sometimes, playing the game and wishing, wishing that somehow, if for just one moment I could step into that world and see my precious team in person. To see my umbreon's ebony and gold fur shimmer in the moonlight, to feel what a ciboria's leaf felt like, to smell gloom's signature stink. I imagine how wonderful it must be to travel the road under the wide open sky to different towns and gyms with only my pokemon and maybe a couple of human friends by my side. Not too long ago, in my favorite Honen episode (So far. The one with poochena. It so kyoot! -) I heard Max comment about how seeing pokemon up close is different form just looking in books, how they're "really real and you can smell their scent and even see 'em breathe. I wish I could really know what he meant.

Am I obsessing over this thing we call pokemon? In my opinion, not really. It doesn't dominate my life, I don't think about it all the time, just when I watch the show, listen to the music, or play the game. Or when it's two in the morning and I can't sleep. Plus, maybe I sometimes make it seem more than it really is due to my over imaginative nature. I hear the derogatory comments on pokemon and ignore them, because I know they're just not true. It isn't "gay" (geez people learn a new word!) and it was not "just a fad". For them perhaps, but not to everyone. If it were a fad, no one would even remember it, no one would own anything to do with it. (Like Furby. Which, by the way I still own and love. It just needs batteries.) But it left it's mark alright. The word will be remembered. Ask anyone, anyone and they'll probably recognize a pikachu (even if they don't know the name, but they know what it is), rather than say, Goku or Megaman.

I keep my Yu-Gi-Oh deck in a safe place and try to keep them in the best condition possible and yes, I really do believe in the heart of the cards (as corny as it may sound). I love my deck. I love a lot of things.

I know a lot of you other poke fan might feel the same way, maybe more, maybe less, but it's left an impact in some way or you wouldn't be reading this right now. There really a lot more poke fans left out there than I once thought and it's nice to argue with people about little things like weather or not they just copied the old pokemon for Ruby/Sapphire.

I used to never say it, or shy away from saying it, but I'll gladly say it now.

I am a poke maniac.

And I couldn't care less if anyone says Vegita could blast away pikachu in one blow.

After all, we all know Mew would blow him away in the end.