Disclaimer: I did it again. I used a "Weird Al" Yankovic song to write a parody. Neither Gundam Wing nor "Your Horoscope For Today" belongs to me. Okay there are some characters and Gundam models I just don't like, just as there are Gundams I really like. Thanks for reading!
Your Mobile Suit For Today
Adaptation by Amalia Ryoko James
Wing Zero!
There's travel in your future when your pilots' sanity runs amok
Fill that void in you metallic life by trying not to self-destruct 24 hours a day
Pisces!
Try to avoid any and all Gundams wielding thermodynamic scythes
You are the true Lord of the Sea, no matter what those idiots at OZ say
Aries!
The destruction of you suit will be priceless when you find that 70-ton Gundam hidden in the forest
Trade parting shots with a few Gundam pilots then get rescued by Zechs Merquise
Taurus!
You'll never get to go to outer space- what you gonna do cry about it?
The stars predict tomorrow you'll wake up, fight a lot of stuff and then go back to sleep
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
Deathscythe HELL!
Relena's parties will be ruined once again by a thermodynamic scythe
Deathscythe ran into trouble when a friend turned to OOZ fired a beam rifle into its chest
Cancer!
The position of L2 says you should spend the rest of the week drawing rebel blood
Try not to get destroyed while searching for the Gundam wreck
Leo!
Now is not a good time to fire rounds at a Gundam- especially one backed by Maguanacs
Try to fry a little blonde's Gundam and get mauled by a Gundam's dragon arm
Virgo!
Virgos are all sentient and auto-intelligent except for you
Expect big surprise today when you wind up with your head impaled upon a scythe
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely that the relative position of the colonies and stars could have a special deep significance that applies to only you. But let me give you my assurance that these forecasts and predictions are all based on solid scientific documented evidence. So you would have to be some odd OZ moron not to realize that every single one of them is absolutely true. Where was I?
Libra!
A big destruction is just around the corner for something just as talented as you
Laughter is the very best medicine. Remember that when this ship explodes next week
Heavyarms!
Get ready for an unexpected trip when you flip in the air to Catherine
Work a little bit harder modifying you ammo reserves you nameless freak
Sandrock Custom!
All the Maguanacs are laughing at your attacks… kill them
Take down all those freaking OZ soldiers trying to get into your secret den
Nataku!
The stars say you're an exciting modified Gundam but you know they're lying
If I were you I'd lock myself in a cave and never never never never never leave that cave again
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today
That's your mobile suit for today