There was an old saying that went along the lines of: "You can't teach an old dog new tricks." It was a saying that Soubi had heard many times before, and a saying that very well proved to be quite true. What was more true, however, was the converse of the statement. Old dogs cannot forget old tricks. Some habits never went away. Some training just couldn't be forgotten, even if one so wished. Some things just never changed, and there was nothing Soubi could do about it.
Soubi still had the more-than-occasional slip up. These were things he'd learned while with Seimei that either did not apply to Ritsuka or things that the boy simply did not like. Whenever Soubi made a mistake, Ritsuka would freeze up complete and do one of two things-either gently tell Soubi not to do such a thing or scold him a bit more harshly. Never more than that, even if Soubi asked him to. He didn't like that Ritsuka didn't punish him for such things. It meant he wouldn't learn, and thus, he wouldn't quit making those mistakes. He didn't want to disappoint Ritsuka anymore.
These slip ups started happening less and less. Though, after a year, they still happened. And it angered Soubi. Even after a year, it still happened and it showed up at the worst possible times.
He was sitting at the desk, doing his homework, like a good little student should. Per usual, Soubi was with him, doing nothing in particular. He watched the boy work, and his mind began to wander, so much so that he didn't realize he was being talked to until there was a pillow thrown at him to get his attention. Only then did he snap out of his daze.
"Soubi! Are you even listening to me?"
"Yes, Master."
His words were graced with a gentle smile, as usual. Completely normal. That is, until he realized what he'd just said. It had simply slipped out. Soubi had said it without a single thought. An automatic response. Seimei had trained him to respond in such a way to him. Ritsuka now owned him. He was now his master. That was only the natural way for Soubi to address him. It was odd to just adress him as 'Ritsuka'. That gave an air of equality, as if they were equal in every way, when Ritsuka was really the one who owned and had the power to control Soubi and tell him to do whatever he wanted.
Some days, Soubi just didn't understand why he didn't use that power. He was a child, a loveless child. All he had to do was order Soubi to kill those who hurt him and to love him, not that Soubi didn't already. If he didn't believe in Soubi's words of love, then why didn't he either order him to stop or order him to prove it? Why put himself through the pain? Ritsuka was looking for love, however stubborn he may be. It pained Soubi to know that the only person he had was a stupid, broken puppy who wanted him, a child, a thirteen year old boy, to order him around.
There were some nights, when Ritsuka would come to his apartment at one in the morning, bleeding and asking for a place to stay, and all Soubi could do was fight the urge to ask the question that so burned on his tongue: "Is that an order?"
Then as he welcomed Ritsuka in, he was torn on whether or not to hold the upset child in his arms and comfort him. He had been trained not to touch without permission, but when Ritsuka was teary-eyed and trembling in front of him, Soubi didn't know whether or not to follow his first instinct or his training. And when he did end up holding Ritsuka, he expected him to lash out at him, when all Ritsuka did was bury his head in his chest.
Time went on slowly. Things didn't change. Ritsuka tried to help Soubi. He tried to get him to stop calling him 'master', and stop him from asking for punishments and orders. None of it worked, and Soubi hated himself for not changing. He supposed it couldn't be helped, though. After all, as the saying went:
"You can't teach an old dog new tricks."
Something I wrote to calm down. Cross posted from my rp account.
-TTBG/Cheywolfe