Set You Free
Everything's been so messed up lately, I'm surprised I even know which way's up and which way's down. I'm amazed that I have actually managed to carry on when so much stress was placed on me at once. And it was all caused by one man. Dewey Finn.
I don't know what my feelings are on him. I don't believe that he actually pretended to be Ned Schneebly and that I actually fell for his ruse, but somehow I feel that his intentions weren't sinister. Or maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part.
But I couldn't sworn there was like, this connection between the two of us. He said it was there, but maybe he lied about that too. I really hope he didn't. I think that would just crush me even more.
However, there is the possibility that the whole time he was just playing me for the fool. He could've carefully orchestrated each conversation to further gain my trust and to reach his ultimate goal: Battle of the Bands.
I just wish that I knew how to work everything out. That I could step back and not let my emotions get in the way. That I could see whether or not his intentions were malicious or if he was just some sad rocker, looking to fulfill his dream.
I really hope it was the latter. I could totally relate to that. But then again, who doesn't? Who doesn't relate to that sad washed-up rocker, who only wants to put on a great show? Who doesn't want to fill the hearts of people with a music that's so pure that it just blows their minds out? Who doesn't want to see some middle-aged rocker plant the seed of hope in the future generations?
I can totally relate to that sad rocker, cause I know that sad rocker lives inside me. That same rocker that cried when John Lennon was shot. The same rocker that still believes to this day that Courtney killed Kurt. The same rocker that will always be in my heart.
And when Dewey came along it was like, I had someone I could totally relate to. Someone who still was passionate about "sticking it to the Man". And he re-opened my eyes. He made me realize, inadvertently of course, that I didn't want to be the Man anymore. I just wanted to head-bang to some good old hard rock. And that's when I realized that maybe I didn't have to take my job so seriously. Maybe I could be more fun and still be the principal of a prep school. That maybe I could influence these kids and help them love rock without the drugs and the booze.
Maybe I'm crazy. Maybe Dewey was just out to make a fast buck and was just playing me like he plays his guitar. All I know is, I remember that rush of exhilaration I felt at that fateful Battle of the Bands and that it was a familiar feeling. All of a sudden I had gone back to my rock roots. And I was happy.
So maybe Dewey was just a con-man. Or maybe he was more than that. But even if he was simply a con-man, he was more than that to me. I simply know in my heart that I'm never going to be the same principal again. My eyes have been re-opened to the world of rock. I have been set free.
- - - - - - - - - -
A/N: If you couldn't tell, this is Ms. Mullins-centric. I feel there would've been a lot going through her mind recently after the Battle of the Bands and I feel people sometimes overlook the fact that she was definitely into rock. I think too many stories focus only on the kids and Dewey, or even just only on the kids. I like to step back and appreciate the under-appreciated characters.