This is it. This is the end of me, of my friendship with Demi Lovato. This is the end of everything.
I guess I should explain why I feel so damn depressed right now. Just a few minutes ago I was eliminated from The X Factor US. I was eliminated from Demi's life. I think about crying but then I realise that I don't want Demi's last view of me to be one where I'm crying.
I feel a tap behind me on my shoulder, and something tells me that it's Demi. I don't know why, but something tells me that it's her. So I turn about funnily enough, her beautiful brown eyes sown into her flawless skin, which is complimented by her perfect blond hair falling right past her shoulders. I feel her eyes looking right through me, as if she somehow knows that all I want to do is fall into her arms and have her hold me until I've no tears left in me.
"Jennel, are you okay?" she asks just as I look down; there's a hint of sadness in her voice.
Oh, what sadness. I mean, WHY would she be SAD that I was leaving the competition? She's probably relieved that now she has one less contestant to mentor and bring to the grand finale.
I look up just to remember that she is waiting for my answer. But what can I say? "I'm perfectly fine, thank you very much". Or how about "No, I'm not fine because right now you're feeling sorry for me and all I can think about is having our lips touch".
"I'm alright, I'll be okay." I reply. I think she's noticed the trembling in my voice. Oh yes, she definitely has because I can feel her soft skin touching mine as she reaches for my hands down my side. This is a feeling I never want to forget. The butterflies in my stomach start going crazy, as if they're reacting to Demi's breathtaking touch too.
I feel a tear escape my eyes and trickle down my cheek. Another follows and so does another.
"No, not here you don't." She took my hand completely and dragged me away from backstage. We walk through some corridors until we reach the back of the building. A big door flashes "EXIT" and we head for it. Sunlight startles me as she pushes the door open, but it doesn't seem to affect her because she just keeps walking straight into the light and turns at one point.
Why is she doing this? Why is she taking the time to look after me when she could be focusing on the other contestants? Why is she with me? And why does she keep gently squeezing my hand as we walk?
God, Jennel. Stop it. She doesn't like you. STOP thinking that, for Pete's sakes.
We reach a corner and there don't seem to be any seats for us to sit in. I'm wearing denim shorts and a check-shirt so it won't be a problem to sit down on the floor for me, but she's wearing a revealing, tight, elegant dress that makes me wonder how she'll sit. It reaches down to her knees so it will be a challenge for her to sit.
"Come, sit down with me," she speaks softly while still holding my hand, "we need to talk."