((I left before the funeral because I didn't want to have to say goodbye.
It was the cowardly thing to do, but I kept thinking about the first time I looked into your eyes and saw forever waiting there.
I was convinced that forever was still out there; After all, it lasts for an eternity.. But if I said goodbye to you, it would prove to be as ephemeral as a butterfly's touch, as fleeting as the chime of a bell. Forever would fade, eternity would vanish, and I would be alone.
Because I did not want to admit that you would not be able to finish it yourself.))
-Ameko
I am trying to see
I'm trying to believe
This is not where I should be
I am trying to believe
No one's even sure
What we're fighting for
Or who we even are
Anymore
I feel..
So dead---
-Trent Reznor
(A/N: This is a retrospective on Konohamaru, after the death of Sarutobi-sensei/kage/whatevergrandfather. I hate how everyone in the world hates the little squirt, so I had to "write my anger out" by doing this. Why don't you people like him? He's adorable)
//Enjoy!//
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"Footsteps"
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I stood there, waiting.
I always knew you were the best of the best.
You never failed me, no matter what.
You always told me to never give up, to "Be strong and endure, untill you prevailed."
...What ever happened to that?
-X-
I walked out from my hiding place among the trees, smiling..but only for a minute.
I'm not supposed to be here, but I am trying to understand what it meant...
I smiled as I thought about how easy it was for you to teach me exactly nothing, that it was that easy for you to just give up.
He beat you with such ferocity and evil that you just... gave up ! 'What were you fighting for?' ...Nothing. You never saved anyone...
My smile quickly wavored into a quivering frown.
'Stupid Grandpa. Stupid, stupid, foolish... Grandpa.'
-X-
You were my grandfather, I was your grandson, and nothing could change that--
---or the love I once had for you, your most endearing pupil..
I don't know what to do, or think; My earliest idol has given up, so what should I do now?
...Now I cannot believe or take in my heart the values and morals you've taught me. They are now meaningless; worthless.
From the very first time I saw you behind the desk, Hokage, I thought,
'I wanna be just like him, in every single way!'
...But to stay true to that, I would have to give up as well!
...I feel so dead. Alone, and nothing will ever change that.
...I will never be Hokage. Ever. I don't want to ever be like you, Grandpa. I hate you.
-X-
I weep at your grave, but only because now, I cannot tell you how disappointed I am in you... for failing me.
And you never failed me.
My only savior, the only one I could feel at ease talking to.
...But then you'd say (if you were still here) , "There's always Naruto."
...But he's different, he'll never be you...Grandfather. Ever.
-X-
'Why did you have to be so weak?' I smile again, mocking myself.
"From now on, I'll pretend you have never existed. Everyone else will, too, at one point or another."
When I grow up, I won't be leader.
...I'll be follower; aimlessly, and meaninglessly wallowing in your long-lost.. "footsteps"
..It's my final dream and wish; getting killed... gracelessly, on a mission..., that is what I truly look forward to.
The great, valiant "Honorable Grandson", engraved in the stone.
...At least it won't be the same way that your soul destroyed istelf.
...I won't be Hokage !
-X-
...I will miss you, but to be exact, I'll miss trying to be better than you.
And I will never forget those things you taught me; [Nothing
After today, I will hold no regrets
...Save one thing..
I regret holding any respect for you.
You were weak, and that is all you have taught me to be.
"...Foolish Grandpa."