Author's Note: This is not finished yet! There'll be a second part posted hopefully tomorrow or Monday. However, I wanted to get this story up for YourFairyGodfather before too much longer passed, being as its for the Artina ficathon and all. However, I've been traveling for about three days straight with remnants of the stubborn cold from earlier this week (four states, 1200 miles, yes I am crazy), but this prompt hit me hard and I just couldn't stop writing.
Prompt: balloons, glitter, mayhem. Any genre or additional characters.
I hope you like it so far, prompter!
It started with a simple enough idea. Artie, Tina, and Mercedes were loitering in the choir room after school, even though they didn't have practice that day, and really, no reason to be there. They had always met there after school to gossip and socialize before heading their separate ways for home, and today was no exception.
Kurt had left their little group already for Cheerios practice. Never mind that Glee club had just been restored for another year, or that school let out for the summer in less than two week's time. Sue Sylvester was not about to let her Nationals winning Cheerios slack off, no way, no how. His absence, in hindsight, was probably how they had all managed to work their way around to the topic of Kurt's seventeenth birthday, which was apparently this Saturday.
"Really?" says Tina curiously. "I didn't know that's when Kurt's birthday was. He never really talks about it much."
Mercedes tucks a book into her bag and offers Tina a look. "I shouldn't be saying this, but…"
"Then don't?" suggests Artie, less than helpfully.
Both Tina and Mercedes glare at him, before Mercedes continues. "Kurt's mom died right around his birthday. Apparently he hasn't had a birthday party since he was seven."
"That sucks," says Tina, her hands already fidgeting with her arm warmers slightly. They relax when Artie reaches out to take her hand, and she squeezes gently.
Mercedes grins at the gesture. "Well, lovebirds, I think we should do something about it."
"What if Kurt doesn't want a party?" says Artie.
"Then we'll say it's a party to celebrate the fact that Glee's around for another year." Mercedes looks proud of herself. "And anyway, we'll pick a theme that he's bound to love. If he loves the theme, then the boy can't bear to say no."
"Lady Gaga?" suggests Tina. "He really liked Lady Gaga week."
"And Adam Lambert," adds Mercedes. "He's totally over the moon his dad managed to snag concert tickets for the summer tour. Adam Lambert meets Lady Gaga. He's gonna flip!"
Tina grins. "Balloons, glitter, and mayhem. I like it, Mercedes."
"I knew you would. But where are we going to have the party?" Mercedes pales. "My brother just got home from college for the summer, and his stuff is everywhere. I can't have anyone over!"
"Normally I'd say yes, but my parents are busy getting ready for my Great Aunt Millie's visit next week," says Tina sadly. "We're hosting the family reunion this year, and it's the week after school lets out. Things are a madhouse at home."
Artie holds his hands up in front of his face when both of the girls send him identical pleading looks. "You know how my mom is," he reminds them. "Besides, we don't have a big enough space at my house to comfortably everyone in Glee, let alone enough room for us to have a party there."
All three of them frown and the room settles into silence as they consider their next move.
"I like parties. They're very sparkly," says a slightly-confused voice from over Tina's shoulder.
Tina jumps up in her seat. "Gah!" she shrieks, looking back. "Oh, Brittany. Why aren't you at Cheerios practice?"
"I got lost." The blonde shrugs.
Mercedes shakes her head, but plows on. "Yeah, parties can be that, Brittany. We're planning something for Kurt's birthday. But we don't have a place for the party."
Brittany smiles. "I like parties. Have it at my house. The llama won't mind."
"The llama?" asks Tina.
"George likes parties." Brittany blinks, then grins brightly when she sees Santana enter the choir room. "Santana! We're having a party Saturday. Me and George are! I knew you'd find me."
Santana shrugs. "You want to have a party at your place? What kind of party, Brit?"
"A sparkly one." Brittany reaches out for her friend's hand. "With glitter."
"You want a sparkly party?" Santana raises an eyebrow, but takes Brittany's hand. "We'll talk about it after practice."
Mercedes quickly interjects with. "A birthday party for Kurt. Adam Lambert meets Lady Gaga."
"Ooh! George can wear his feather boa!" Brittany giggles.
Santana sneers at Mercedes, but sighs. "We've got practice Saturday, Brittany."
"After," says Tina squeakily. "It could be fun?"
Brittany nods her head up and down like a bobblehead. "And his glitterati shades! Kurt will be so impressed."
"Fine." Santana huffs as she stares down the other three people in the room. "You all are doing the prep, the planning, and the clean-up, got it?" She glares at Artie in particular.
Artie wisely keeps his mouth shut and nods an affirmative response. He doesn't let out the breath he's been holding until Santana and Brittany merrily skip off to practice.
"Just where does Brittany live?" he asks, finally. "Does she even know where she lives?"
"Across the street from the school," says Mercedes. "I had to help her home a few times after Cheerios practice. You and Tina could probably walk there from your neighborhood. It's the brick place on the corner lot."
Tina nods. "I like that house. So… Artie and I can do the party set up on Saturday afternoon if you're okay with being in charge of getting all the food ready?"
Mercedes grins and nods. "Me and Quinn will take care of getting the food. She's been a mess since she had the baby. This'll be good for her."
Tina reaches for a notebook to start jotting down their ideas. "And costumes, right? Kurt will be at practice. How will we get him to Brittany's?"
"Santana and Brittany will get Kurt over, I'm sure," says Artie. "And Mercedes, maybe you can pack some stuff for Kurt so that way, he can plan his own outfit when he arrives?"
"Sounds great." Tina scribbles the details down furiously. "Okay. I want a duct tape corset."
Artie pauses. "Er, say what?"
"A duct tape corset," repeats Tina. "I saw it on DeviantArt. I think I could make one in time for the party."
"That's …nice." Artie coughs, rubs his hastily-reddening neck, and turns to Mercedes.
Mercedes cackles and whistles. "You two are something else. Now, I gotta go ask my mom if she can make some of her famous homemade mac and cheese. And find my Gaga wig!" She grabs her backpack and strolls out the door with a wave.
Tina shrugs and exchanges a look with Artie. "Why are you so red?"
Artie coughs, and it sounds suspiciously like: girlfriendinacorset.
"On second thought, maybe I should just wear my Gaga dress again…" Tina looks embarrassed.
"Tee, you can't sit down in your Gaga dress," he points out.
"Oh. Point."
Artie shrugs. "And anyway, you're set, but what am I gonna wear?"
"I've got the perfect idea."
Tina arrives at Brittany's right after lunch on Saturday, dressed in cut-offs, a t-shirt, and barely able to see because of the pile of decorations in her arms. Artie is wheeling behind her, balancing a disco ball precariously in his lap.
Santana opens the door with a bored look. "Good. Brit and I need to go. Her parents are out and will be for the rest of the weekend. Anyway, the rec room's in the back of the house and whatever you do, don't touch the llama."
"The what?" Tina adjusts the pile of decorations with her chin and gives Santana a confused look.
"You heard me." Santana shrugs, links pinkies with Brittany and together they take off across the street to the high school for practice.
Tina nods, tries not to drop the decorations, and throws them haphazardly on the living room sofa before heading back to help Artie up the single step from the cement path into the living room. "A llama?" she says skeptically.
"Beats me." Artie shrugs one shoulder lazily and adjusts the disco ball in his lap. "How'd you manage to find this thing anyway, Tina?"
"My parents had it in the basement," she replies casually. "Apparently my mom turned her dorm room into a seventies-themed nightclub back during her college days."
"Sweet. So she let you—" Artie trails off as they enter the rec room, which is for the most part, filled with what one would expect, except for the life-sized stuffed llama in the corner near the television set.
They both stare at it, dumbstruck.
"So. Llama." Tina tentatively walks over and gently pokes it in the nose, then squeals. "Artie. That's not a plush llama. I think…. I think it's a real one."
"Like one that was like… alive?" Artie blinks, then points at a picture on the wall of Brittany, and a male who bears a more than uncanny resemblance to her. The frame reads Taxidermist Of The Year 2008.
Tina follows Artie's gaze and pales. Seconds later, she's standing behind Artie's chair and shaking slightly.
"It's just a stuffed llama," says Artie carefully.
"Creepy," replies Tina. "Ew."
"You're scared of it?" he asks.
Tina blushes and ducks behind his chair. "I think it was staring at me."
Artie shakes his head. "Come on, Tee. It won't bite. I will, if you want?"
A giggle escapes. "Okay, maybe later. Help me throw copious amounts of glitter everywhere?"
"It is the STD of craft projects, after all." Artie nods and reaches for one of the extra-large bottles of glittery silly string they'd picked up at the party supply store that morning.
"Where on earth did you hear that?" asks Tina, her giggle turning into full-fledged laughter.
Artie shrugs and sprays the silly string at her. "Funny YouTube video."
Tina reaches for another can of silly string and aims for Artie's hair. "Suuuuure."
Tina pulls yet another strand of silly string out of her hair and sighs. "We had that fight three hours ago, and I'm still pulling this gunk out of my hair."
"Sorry?" says Artie, but he doesn't sound all that sorry. His wheelchair is leaving a suspicious trail of glitter in its wake as he wheels around the laminate floor of the rec room. Tina's helped him pick out dark jeans, a black dress shirt, a fedora, and sliver, glittery, sparkly suspenders to wear. (He really likes how the suspenders reflect the light from the disco ball, and is wondering if he can maybe accidently blind Puck with them if he shows up tonight.)
"I can just feel the sincerity in that apology from here," replies Tina sarcastically as she zips up her boots in the bathroom. She's tugging at her blouse and fidgeting with her duct-tape corset as she enters the rec room. "Be a sport and help tape me into this thing?"
"Me?" Artie squeaks.
Tina wags a roll of purple duct tape at him. "No, your evil twin Bartie. Yes, help me with this thing. Please."
Artie rolls his eyes and pats his lap. "Okay. Come here."
She nods and delicately perches on her boyfriend's knees.
"You won't break me, promise." He sighs and wraps an arm around her waist to pull her more securely into his lap, accidently grazing her breast in the process. His hand whips around to the arm rest as they both turn brilliant shades of red.
They both sit there in silence for a few minutes until Tina coughs. "My corset, Artie?"
"Oh right." He pulls off several strips of the purple duct tape, then carefully secures the tape in what he hopes is a close enough resemblance to the stripes of gray and purple tape already around Tina's torso.
When he's done, she hops up from his lap and kisses his cheek. "Thanks."
"No problem. Think we've got enough decorations?" he replies, with a wink.
Tina laughs. The rec room is covered from wall to floor with rainbow streamers, and confetti and glitter are tossed haphazardly on and around the table to one side, where the food will be placed. Balloons are dangling from the walls, along with the disco ball in all its glory. MTV is on the TV, with the volume low as a rerun of The Hills plays. Music flows just as softly from the CD player they brought along, and overall, it looks sparkly enough to do both Lady Gaga and Adam Lambert proud.
Mercedes and Quinn stroll in a few minutes later. Quinn has recycled her ridiculous Lady Gaga eyelashes, but she's wearing them with a simple black sundress and a hot pink feather boa. Mercedes, as promised, is wearing her purple bow wig, which has been covered with glitter.
"Nice costumes," says Artie. "Where's the food?"
"My momma went overboard," groans Mercedes. "It's all in my car. Pigs in a blanket, mac and cheese, chocolate chip cookies, and a fruit salad after I told her Rachel is a vegan."
"Wow," says Tina appreciatively. "Want me to help you bring it in?"
"What about the cake?" asks Artie. "We need a cake."
Mercedes pales. "Damn. I forgot. I'm sorry."
"We'll make do," says Quinn. She adjusts her boa and reaches for a bag near her feet. "We also have about twenty gallons of coke and diet coke. Is that the food table over there?"
Tina nods. By the time the food's set up, Brittany and Santana have returned. "Coach Sylvester asked to talk to Kurt after practice," says Santana. "He'll be here, though."
"I told him George missed him!" says Brittany proudly. She skips across the room and gives the stuffed llama the promised gitterati shades and a flower lei to wear. "There we go! He's ready."
"Her uncle's a taxidermist," replies Santana with a shrug before she and Brittany excuse themselves to go change into their party outfits.
Tina exchanges a confused look with Artie before the doorbell rings again. Finn arrives, looking sheepish and wearing what looks like something that was swiped from the costume stash used by the drama department for their spring production of Midsummer Night's Dream. (It was.)
Puck arrives two minutes after that, with a case of cheap (crappy) beer. He's not wearing a costume, but Santana and Quinn both manage to throw what's left of the glittery silly string at him anyway.
Mike arrives five minutes after that with a large bottle of rum (decent quality). He's managed to find a necklace made of peacock feathers, which he's wearing with his head-to-toe black ensemble.
Rachel flounces in on Mike's heels (literally), wearing the Gaga costume her mother made for her, carrying a balloon arrangement nearly as tall as her. ("Seventeen said that balloon arrangements were a perfect gift for any age!" )
Matt arrives a minute before Kurt does, wearing his shirt from the boys' KISS performance and sheepishly showing Mercedes his contribution to the party. It's a cake, obviously homemade, covered in white marshmallow frosting and that looks like the entire local grocer's supply of sprinkles, edible glitter, and confetti candy. Happy Birthday Kurt! is printed in rainbow gel frosting.
"Did you make this yourself?" asks Mercedes, astounded.
Matt nods a nervous affirmative before Kurt is seen crossing the street. The cake is covered and set on the food table while everyone tries to duck under tables, behind sofas, and wherever they can find space.
Kurt knocks on Brittany's door. When no one answers, he tries the door handle. It's unlocked, and he peers into the dark house. "Hello?"
"SURPRISE!"