DISCLAIMER
None of these characters except Demonica and Telsie are mine so please don't sue me because there, I admitted it, I DON'T OWN THEM!!!!! Oh yes, I don¹t own the rights to the Jerry Springer Show or have any contact with the man himself either. I must also say thank you to Beth, without whom I wouldn't have thought about writing fanfic in the first place and without whom this story wouldn't have quite as many paragraphs (because she wrote some even though she isn't an Austin Powers fan), also it was Beth who persuaded me to post it (it's been sitting on my computer's hard drive doing nothing for months). So hey, in thanks to Beth, go and read her ER fanfic - its really good (if you like ER, I don't personally but still). And thanks to Claire who wrote a couple of bits too (even though she doesn't like Austin Powers either!). So yeah, I'll get on with the story. Its my first attempt at fanfic so bear with me - it gets better!
A Touch Of Evil
"Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" The audience chanted as the opening theme music faded and the world famous host of the world famous talk show, Jerry Springer came into view. The audience's chant died down as Jerry began to speak.
"Good evening everybody, on tonight's show we'll be hearing the stories of two women who had their children separated at birth. First on tonight's show we speak to a veteran of this studio, Frau Fabissina!" The camera swung to reveal a harsh looking lady, wearing a black PVC coat with matching trousers come through the door from backstage. She moved to a seat where she sat down, arranging her coat around her. Jerry moved over to her and spoke gently to her, a manner in which the Frau was not used to being spoken to, "Welcome back to the show Frau Fabissina, so tell me, what¹s your story?"
"Well Jerry, nineteen years ago I gave birth to twins, a boy, Scott and a girl, Demonica." The audience cooed at the thought of the two babies, Frau continued, "But a week after their birth I gave up Demonica for adoption in England."
"So," Jerry said calmly, as only he could, "Does Scott know about his sister, or Demonica about her brother?"
"No. I don¹t even think Demonica knows who I am!" The Frau shouted, causing Jerry to jump back a step.
"So does their Father know about Demonica?"
"Dr. Evil knows he has a daughter but he knows nothing more."
"So, are you going to introduce Scott to his sister?"
"³Ja, I am going to England to fetch her and bring her back here to meet her family!"
"Awwwwwwwww!" The audience cooed. Jerry turned back to the chair where the Frau had been sitting but she had gone.
"Okay..." Jerry said slowly, "Well she sure acts fast! Next tonight we'll be hearing from a lady who gave birth to twin monkeys in Siberia! Stay tuned!"
As the theme music played out across America, Frau Fabissina and Number Two boarded fight no. 78563, to London, England.
~~~~~~
Marble Arch Tube Station, London, the same day
Demonica Forbes walked briskly down to Marble Arch Tube Station, looking at her watch as she went down the escalator. As she reached the platform and she sat down on the hard plastic seats the tannoy system crackled into action,
"Attention all passengers travelling towards Ealing Broadway Interchange," Demonica looked up and took one headphone from her ear to listen, the voice continued, "There will be a delay of half an hour due to circumstances beyond our control. We are sorry for any inconvenience caused." The tannoy crackled off and Demonica groaned, she looked at her watch again: she was already over an hour late as it was, she couldn't wait any longer. As she ascended the escalator and the late afternoon sun hit her eyes, before she knew what was happening, a long black car with blacked out windows pulled up. A man in a grey suit and an eye patch got out of the car and without a word pushed a bewildered Demonica inside, he followed, first checking that no one had seen the operation, just an old man with a dog, and bang! They were soon dealt with. Demonica looked around her, she eyed the two people who were sitting on either side to her, the man with an eye patch on her right and the other, a woman, or at least she thought it was a woman, her dark hair pulled back into a tight style at the back of her head, on her left. Demonica knew she had never seen this woman before in her life but somehow she recognised her. The cycloptic man interrupted her thoughts.
"I am Number Two." He said not glancing at Demonica as he spoke.
"Oh." She said quietly, shifting awkwardly in her seat.
"And I," the lady said loudly, in a clipped German accent, "am Frau Fabissina."
Demonica nodded again, "Nice to meet you," she muttered . But Frau Fabissina had not finished, she took Demonica¹s hand in her own leather gloved one and added,
"But you can call me Mom." Demonica¹s eyes grew wide and she gulped as the harsh lady smiled grimly at her.
~~~~~~
Starbucks Coffee, Seattle, the same day
Frau Fabissina, Dr. Evil, Mini-Me, Number Two and Demonica were sitting around the table in the main chamber of Starbucks Coffee, Seattle, drinking Cafe Latte. During the seven hour transatlantic flight, Frau Fabissina had explained the situation to Demonica. She was the daughter of Dr. Evil, head of Virtucon, Starbucks Coffee, a steel mill, shipping, an oil refinery and a factory in Chicago which specialises in making models of factories. She was the twin sister of Scott Evil, but had been separated from him at birth and sent to live in England with the Forbes family. Demonica's eyes scanned the table -opposite her sat Frau Fabissina, she could hardly believe that this woman actually shared genes with her. At the head of the table sat Dr. Evil himself, it was even more difficult for her to believe that she shared genes with the baldy egg head who faced her. And that miniature man who looked exactly like her Father, she didn't even want to contemplate what Scott would look like......her thoughts were interrupted when her mothers sharp voice pierced the air,
"SCOTT!"
Dr. Evil flinched and his discomfort increased as a door slammed nearby. Scott was clearly still in the same foul mood he was in everytime he saw his father.
"Oh, so you¹ve decided to join us today, Scott." Dr. Evil said dryly as his son entered the chamber. Scott, however, ignored this comment and moved over to a large machine in the corner, where he made himself a cappuccino. Without giving Demonica a second glance he slipped in the chair next to hers. There was silence for a moment only with the sound of Dr. Evil trying unsuccessfully trying to drink his coffee without giving himself a frothy moustache and nose, what he liked to call a Belgian Dip. Demonica used this silence to look at her brother. He had spiky purple hair, deep set blue eyes and the expression on his face was sullen and brooding. He wore a black pinstriped shirt over a black t-shirt and baggy jeans.
"Hey, mom." He spoke, startling Demonica who quickly looked away from him, "Who the hell is she?" he asked, indicating with his cappuccino towards Demonica.
Frau Fabissina restrained her anger at her sons insolence, "Scott," she said in a clipped tone, "I¹d like you to meet a long lost relation of yours..."
"You could say," Dr. Evil interrupted, "she's a quasi evil."He sniggered at his vain attempt at humour with Mini-Me. Frau Fabissina, ignoring him, continued,
"Scott, I'd like you to meet Demonica, your twin sister."
For a second, silence filled the chamber then the explosion came, "God, I hate you!" He slammed down his cappuccino so that a quantity of frothy milk and chocolate sprinkles spilled over the side of the cup and onto the table. Frau Fabissina glared at her son, shaking with rage but as if by some extreme effort of will power she stopped herself from hitting him, instead slamming her whip down hard onto the table so that it shuddered violently. Dr. Evil and Mini-Me were jolted back in their chairs which slid slowly across the floor. Demonica tried unsuccessfully to stifle a laugh.
"Riiiiiiiiiight," Dr. Evil said slowly, pushing himself and Mini-Me back to the table, "That wasn't quite the reaction we were hoping for, Scott."
"Yeah, well," the raging adolescent said, "How'd you expect me to react? You know, a couple of years ago I was like a normal kid, right, living a relatively normal life, then I met my Dad." He got up and moved over to Dr. Evil, staying out of the way of Mini-Me as he continued, "Now my Dad, right, had just been cryogenically frozen all my life!" He dodged Mini-Me as he lunged towards the teenager, "Then, I met my mother," He said, glaring at Frau Fabissina, "On the Jerry Springer show! And now you tell me that that I¹ve got a bloody twin sister who I¹ve never even seen or heard about before-"
"Actually Scott," Dr. Evil interrupted, "that¹s not strictly true, you did spend nine months-"
"Shut up!" Dr. Evil shut up, "Anyway, I've never seen her in my life and you wonder why I react like this!?!?!?" Scott slumped back into his seat and scowled.
After a pause, Frau spoke, "So, Scott, aren¹t you going to say hello to your sister?"
Scott could only groan and roll his eyes at his father's complete lack of understanding and common sense. He reluctantly sighed. "Hey." As he spoke, he glared at Demonica.
None of these characters except Demonica and Telsie are mine so please don't sue me because there, I admitted it, I DON'T OWN THEM!!!!! Oh yes, I don¹t own the rights to the Jerry Springer Show or have any contact with the man himself either. I must also say thank you to Beth, without whom I wouldn't have thought about writing fanfic in the first place and without whom this story wouldn't have quite as many paragraphs (because she wrote some even though she isn't an Austin Powers fan), also it was Beth who persuaded me to post it (it's been sitting on my computer's hard drive doing nothing for months). So hey, in thanks to Beth, go and read her ER fanfic - its really good (if you like ER, I don't personally but still). And thanks to Claire who wrote a couple of bits too (even though she doesn't like Austin Powers either!). So yeah, I'll get on with the story. Its my first attempt at fanfic so bear with me - it gets better!
A Touch Of Evil
"Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" The audience chanted as the opening theme music faded and the world famous host of the world famous talk show, Jerry Springer came into view. The audience's chant died down as Jerry began to speak.
"Good evening everybody, on tonight's show we'll be hearing the stories of two women who had their children separated at birth. First on tonight's show we speak to a veteran of this studio, Frau Fabissina!" The camera swung to reveal a harsh looking lady, wearing a black PVC coat with matching trousers come through the door from backstage. She moved to a seat where she sat down, arranging her coat around her. Jerry moved over to her and spoke gently to her, a manner in which the Frau was not used to being spoken to, "Welcome back to the show Frau Fabissina, so tell me, what¹s your story?"
"Well Jerry, nineteen years ago I gave birth to twins, a boy, Scott and a girl, Demonica." The audience cooed at the thought of the two babies, Frau continued, "But a week after their birth I gave up Demonica for adoption in England."
"So," Jerry said calmly, as only he could, "Does Scott know about his sister, or Demonica about her brother?"
"No. I don¹t even think Demonica knows who I am!" The Frau shouted, causing Jerry to jump back a step.
"So does their Father know about Demonica?"
"Dr. Evil knows he has a daughter but he knows nothing more."
"So, are you going to introduce Scott to his sister?"
"³Ja, I am going to England to fetch her and bring her back here to meet her family!"
"Awwwwwwwww!" The audience cooed. Jerry turned back to the chair where the Frau had been sitting but she had gone.
"Okay..." Jerry said slowly, "Well she sure acts fast! Next tonight we'll be hearing from a lady who gave birth to twin monkeys in Siberia! Stay tuned!"
As the theme music played out across America, Frau Fabissina and Number Two boarded fight no. 78563, to London, England.
~~~~~~
Marble Arch Tube Station, London, the same day
Demonica Forbes walked briskly down to Marble Arch Tube Station, looking at her watch as she went down the escalator. As she reached the platform and she sat down on the hard plastic seats the tannoy system crackled into action,
"Attention all passengers travelling towards Ealing Broadway Interchange," Demonica looked up and took one headphone from her ear to listen, the voice continued, "There will be a delay of half an hour due to circumstances beyond our control. We are sorry for any inconvenience caused." The tannoy crackled off and Demonica groaned, she looked at her watch again: she was already over an hour late as it was, she couldn't wait any longer. As she ascended the escalator and the late afternoon sun hit her eyes, before she knew what was happening, a long black car with blacked out windows pulled up. A man in a grey suit and an eye patch got out of the car and without a word pushed a bewildered Demonica inside, he followed, first checking that no one had seen the operation, just an old man with a dog, and bang! They were soon dealt with. Demonica looked around her, she eyed the two people who were sitting on either side to her, the man with an eye patch on her right and the other, a woman, or at least she thought it was a woman, her dark hair pulled back into a tight style at the back of her head, on her left. Demonica knew she had never seen this woman before in her life but somehow she recognised her. The cycloptic man interrupted her thoughts.
"I am Number Two." He said not glancing at Demonica as he spoke.
"Oh." She said quietly, shifting awkwardly in her seat.
"And I," the lady said loudly, in a clipped German accent, "am Frau Fabissina."
Demonica nodded again, "Nice to meet you," she muttered . But Frau Fabissina had not finished, she took Demonica¹s hand in her own leather gloved one and added,
"But you can call me Mom." Demonica¹s eyes grew wide and she gulped as the harsh lady smiled grimly at her.
~~~~~~
Starbucks Coffee, Seattle, the same day
Frau Fabissina, Dr. Evil, Mini-Me, Number Two and Demonica were sitting around the table in the main chamber of Starbucks Coffee, Seattle, drinking Cafe Latte. During the seven hour transatlantic flight, Frau Fabissina had explained the situation to Demonica. She was the daughter of Dr. Evil, head of Virtucon, Starbucks Coffee, a steel mill, shipping, an oil refinery and a factory in Chicago which specialises in making models of factories. She was the twin sister of Scott Evil, but had been separated from him at birth and sent to live in England with the Forbes family. Demonica's eyes scanned the table -opposite her sat Frau Fabissina, she could hardly believe that this woman actually shared genes with her. At the head of the table sat Dr. Evil himself, it was even more difficult for her to believe that she shared genes with the baldy egg head who faced her. And that miniature man who looked exactly like her Father, she didn't even want to contemplate what Scott would look like......her thoughts were interrupted when her mothers sharp voice pierced the air,
"SCOTT!"
Dr. Evil flinched and his discomfort increased as a door slammed nearby. Scott was clearly still in the same foul mood he was in everytime he saw his father.
"Oh, so you¹ve decided to join us today, Scott." Dr. Evil said dryly as his son entered the chamber. Scott, however, ignored this comment and moved over to a large machine in the corner, where he made himself a cappuccino. Without giving Demonica a second glance he slipped in the chair next to hers. There was silence for a moment only with the sound of Dr. Evil trying unsuccessfully trying to drink his coffee without giving himself a frothy moustache and nose, what he liked to call a Belgian Dip. Demonica used this silence to look at her brother. He had spiky purple hair, deep set blue eyes and the expression on his face was sullen and brooding. He wore a black pinstriped shirt over a black t-shirt and baggy jeans.
"Hey, mom." He spoke, startling Demonica who quickly looked away from him, "Who the hell is she?" he asked, indicating with his cappuccino towards Demonica.
Frau Fabissina restrained her anger at her sons insolence, "Scott," she said in a clipped tone, "I¹d like you to meet a long lost relation of yours..."
"You could say," Dr. Evil interrupted, "she's a quasi evil."He sniggered at his vain attempt at humour with Mini-Me. Frau Fabissina, ignoring him, continued,
"Scott, I'd like you to meet Demonica, your twin sister."
For a second, silence filled the chamber then the explosion came, "God, I hate you!" He slammed down his cappuccino so that a quantity of frothy milk and chocolate sprinkles spilled over the side of the cup and onto the table. Frau Fabissina glared at her son, shaking with rage but as if by some extreme effort of will power she stopped herself from hitting him, instead slamming her whip down hard onto the table so that it shuddered violently. Dr. Evil and Mini-Me were jolted back in their chairs which slid slowly across the floor. Demonica tried unsuccessfully to stifle a laugh.
"Riiiiiiiiiight," Dr. Evil said slowly, pushing himself and Mini-Me back to the table, "That wasn't quite the reaction we were hoping for, Scott."
"Yeah, well," the raging adolescent said, "How'd you expect me to react? You know, a couple of years ago I was like a normal kid, right, living a relatively normal life, then I met my Dad." He got up and moved over to Dr. Evil, staying out of the way of Mini-Me as he continued, "Now my Dad, right, had just been cryogenically frozen all my life!" He dodged Mini-Me as he lunged towards the teenager, "Then, I met my mother," He said, glaring at Frau Fabissina, "On the Jerry Springer show! And now you tell me that that I¹ve got a bloody twin sister who I¹ve never even seen or heard about before-"
"Actually Scott," Dr. Evil interrupted, "that¹s not strictly true, you did spend nine months-"
"Shut up!" Dr. Evil shut up, "Anyway, I've never seen her in my life and you wonder why I react like this!?!?!?" Scott slumped back into his seat and scowled.
After a pause, Frau spoke, "So, Scott, aren¹t you going to say hello to your sister?"
Scott could only groan and roll his eyes at his father's complete lack of understanding and common sense. He reluctantly sighed. "Hey." As he spoke, he glared at Demonica.