AN: Hello everyone. Welcome to my first ever fanfic! If it stinks horribly, I can blame it on being a newby, right? I hope you enjoy, and please please send a little piece of heaven my way and leave a reveiw. Flames, adoration, promises of money; it will all be accepted. I am trying to become a better writer since I have nothing better to do with my time, so any and all critcism will be appreciated. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon; if I did there would be an American live action version as we speak. Hey, a girl can dream, right? I also don't own a singing voice anywhere near as lovely as Dido's, but I would like to thank for for such inspirational lyrics.

With one light on in one room

I know you're up when I get home

With one small step upon the stair

I know your look when I get there

A frown stained the otherwise beautiful face of Usagi Tsukino as she stumbled out of the taxi. It was three in the morning and she was slightly drunk. All she wanted to do is fall into bed and forget all of her problems until tomorrow, but the light coming from her bedroom window told her that wasn't going to happen. She paused for a moment with her eyes closed, trying to shake the fogginess in her head away. She needed to get her thoughts together; she needed all of her strength for what was about to go down.

Reluctantly she reached with shaking hands inside her purse to retrieve her house key. The walk to her front door seemed to be miles long, and the turning of the lock seemed to take Herculean strength. She closed the door behind her as quietly as she could, praying that just maybe he fell asleep with the light on. The house seemed eerily quiet to Usagi, usually it was a warm and welcoming place. Tonight it seemed cold and empty. Tears began to roll down Usagi's cheeks before she could think to stop them. She swiped at them angrily with the back of her hand. Tonight was not the night to be a crybaby. She needed to be the strong woman she had grown to be. She threw her purse on a side table and headed for the stairs.

Usagi hesitated when her foot hit the first step. She could see the look on his face now, the anger clouding his blue eyes, disappointment distorting his otherwise handsome features. Usagi ran her hand through her golden blond hair to calm her nerves. She never liked confrontations, but it wasn't fair to him, to either of them, to keep pretending that everything was fine. This needed to happen, and she didn't want to put it off any longer. Taking a deep breath, she slowly began to ascend the stairs. Everything was going to change after tonight. She just hoped she wasn't making a huge mistake.

The unread book and painful look

The TV's on, the sound is down

One long pause, then you begin

Oh look what the cats bought in

Usagi stood in the doorway to her room waiting for Mamoru to notice her before she entered. He was sitting on their bed staring blankly at a book. She wondered how long he had been staring at that same page. The TV he had on was casting odd shadows across his face every now and then, giving him an almost sinister look.

"Ahem," Usagi cleared her throat to get Mamoru's attention.

Mamoru slowly put the book down on his lap and turned to face his fiancé. Usagi gasped at his appearance. He had circles under his eyes darker then his jet-black hair. His eyes were red and puffy as if he had been…crying? There was a long pause before Mamoru shattered the silence.

"Don't flatter yourself Usa, I have been having a major allergy attack all night," he said evenly. The words stung Usagi to her core. She knew he was angry and saying things just to hurt her, but would it kill him to admit he was hurting too?

"So look at what the cat has drug in," Mamoru sighed.

"Cat, drag in, bunny, ha ha, that's funny," Usagi replied nervously. She mentally kicked herself when she realized how dumb it was to say that. She was trying to be a mature woman, not the goofy, klutzy teenager she used to be. The sound of a book smashing into the wall brought her out of her reverie.

"Mamoru!" she gasped.

"How dare you! How dare you make jokes when you have had me worried sick all night! Do you know what time it is? Why didn't you have your cell phone on? Why didn't you call me to let me know where you were? Where were you Usagi? Were you out with another man? Are you cheating on me?" The rage in Mamoru's eyes was unmistakable.

"Of…of course not!" Usagi sputtered, not believing he would make such an acusation against her. Tears began to form in her eyes again, but she blinked them back before they could spill down her face.

"Then where were you?" Mamoru hissed, barely controlling his anger.

" I was out"

"Out where?"

"Can't you just trust me?" Usagi pleaded.

Mamoru's whole body slumped as if in answer to her question. His eyes left her face and looked down at his hands folded on his lap.

"Of course. Of course you can't. I was out, at a bar, with Minako and Makoto. We drank, we talked. That is all that happened. We didn't flirt, we didn't dance, we didn't even get hit on," Usagi explained. " Do you believe me?"

"I wish you would come in the bedroom. I can't think straight with you hovering in the doorway like that," was Mamoru's reply.

Usagi couldn't help it; the tears were falling freely now. She didn't even bother to wipe them away as she walked into the room and sat in an armchair next to Mamoru's side of the bed.

"I'm sorry Usako. I didn't mean to imply… but you have been so distant lately, and secretive. I just don't know what to believe anymore. Please don't cry," he whispered softly as he reached to brush her tears away. Usagi grabbed his hand before he could reach her face however.

If you were a king up there on your throne

Would you be wise enough to let me go?

"I'm sorry too," Usagi said quietly, rubbing his hand between hers. " I'm sorry I have been so secretive and distant. Mamoru, I think we need to separate for a while." Usagi winced when Mamoru jerked his hand out of her grasp.

"What? We need to what? Over my dead body! How could you suggest such a thing? You belong to me Usagi and there is no way I am going to let you go!" Mamoru swung his legs over the side of the bed and grabbed Usagi by her shoulders. "Do you understand me? You're mine, I won't let you go!" he screamed as he shook her.

For this queen you think you own

Wants to be a hunter again

"I am not property, I don't belong to anyone!" Usagi cried as she shoved him away from her. "Listen to me, please! Things haven't been right with us for a while now, no matter how much you want to deny it."

"That's not true!" Mamoru interrupted. "We've been happy. God, I love you so much Usako, why isn't that enough for you?"

"Oh Mamoru, I love you too, but we haven't been happy. You're angry with me all the time, and now you don't even trust me. And I, I feel so…" Usagi's voice trailed off. She couldn't bear to tell him what she had been feeling lately, what she had confessed to her friends earlier at the bar. Mamoru turned away from her to look out the window.

"You feel so what, Usagi?" Mamoru said tightly. Usagi let out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding.

"Trapped." She stated simply.

I want to see the world alone again

To take a chance on life again

So let me go, let me leave

An uneasy silence settled in the room. Usagi bowed her head down, letting her tears drip onto her arms while Mamoru continued to look out the window, hiding his own tears from his love.

"Why?" Mamoru finally asked, so softly Usagi had to strain to make sure he had actually spoke.

"I've been with you since I was fourteen Mamoru. I feel like I have never had a life of my own. I have only lived for you. I changed everything about me so I could be a perfect girlfriend to you. Now that I'm older, all that has changed. I want to be my own person. I'm trying to be independent and not so needy. But you don't seem to like that."

Mamoru's head snapped back towards Usagi. Her heart broke when she saw the tears streaming from his eyes.

"I never asked you to change for me."

"You didn't stop me either."

"You were my perfect Usako, but now I don't know what to make of you. Selfish, you are being selfish."

For the crown you've placed upon my head feels too heavy now

And I don't know what to say to you but I'll smile anyhow

And all the time I'm thinking, thinking

"You're right. I am being selfish. For the first time in a long time I am thinking about myself. Not 'What would Mamoru think'. Not 'What would Queen Serenity do'. I want to do what is right for me. I want to travel the world, I want to take risks, and I want to rely on myself. I want to grow into the queen I am destined to become. I can't do that if I am clinging to you just to make you happy!"

" I don't know what to say to you Usagi." Mamoru sighed.

"Say you will let me go."

"You realize if you go you may never get me back. If you leave, this may be the last time you ever see me again. Is your desire for independence so great that it just erases everything we have together? I love you Usagi, but there is only so much a man can take."

"Nothing will ever erase what we have together Mamo-chan. I love you, but if things stay how they are, I am afraid we will both be miserable for the rest of our lives. And that is a really long time to be miserable," Usagi said lightly. A small smile appeared on Mamoru's lips.

"Well, it's good to know you can still make jokes at the worst times," Mamoru breathed wistfully.

Usagi took Mamoru's hand into her own again. "This is a no win situation, I'm afraid. If I stay, things will get worse. If I go, I risk losing you. I need this Mamoru. I need to be by myself for a while. Maybe I am being a silly girl, but I chose to believe love will win in the end. I choose to believe when all this is over you won't hate me. I may be a different Usagi when all is said and done, but I will still be the Usagi who loves Mamoru. And I am hoping against hope you will be able to find it in your heart to forgive me. And maybe we can start over."

"You are certainly asking a lot of me. I can't promise you anything Usagi. I can't promise I'll be here when you get back. I don't know if I could forgive you. But I could never forgive myself if I didn't give you your chance. If you say you need this to be happy, I have no choice but to let you go." Mamoru withdrew his hand from Usagi's.

Usagi sat stunned for a moment. He was actually letting her go? It's what she wanted, and yet it felt so bittersweet.

"Please, if you are going to leave me, please go now. I couldn't bear to have you with me all night knowing you are leaving me. I'm afraid if you don't go now, I am going to snap and keep you here forever. Please Usako, you can come back for your things while I am at work tomorrow, but you have to go now!"

Usagi launched herself from the chair into Mamoru's arms. "I love you Mamo-chan, never forget that," she whispered into his ear.

Her mouth found its way to his and they kissed as only lovers who are afraid they will never see each other again can. Finally Mamoru pushed Usagi away.

"Go! Please!" he cried in anguish, burying his face in his hands.

"Goodbye Mamoru," Usagi sobbed, running from the room.

"Goodbye Usagi," Mamoru whispered into his empty room.

I want to be a hunter again

I want to see the world alone again

To take a chance on life again

So let me go.

Usagi only stopped long enough to grab her purse from the side table she had thrown it on earlier. She ran out of this house without even bothering to lock the door. She ran through the roads of her neighborhood, not sure where she was going. She only knew she needed to get as much distance as possible between herself and Mamoru. She was afraid if she looked back her aching heart would change her mind, and she would go back to him.

Finally she stopped, she was out of breath and her legs couldn't carry her any further. She took out her cell phone and called a taxi, she could stay at a hotel tonight. Tomorrow she would get a suitcase and get what she could from her…from Mamoru's house and book the first flight out of Tokyo. She didn't even care where it went, as long as it was away from here. She would have to make sure to call her friends and let them know she was all right. They were going to be mad she didn't ask them for help, but that kind of negated the whole being independent thing. They would understand. Usagi shivered as she waited for the taxi to pick her up. It would be hard at first, but in then end, it would all be worth it. She was going to become a hunter again, and when she finally found herself she would truly be happy.