Disclaimer: All characters belong to Nickelodeon and Steven Hillenburg.

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Spongebob Get's Lucky

Bikini Bottom was overjoyed. Well, all except Squidward. Bikini Bottom's own knuckle-head mcspazzatron and right-wing nut job had gotten married.

Spongebob Squarepants was now a married sponge.

The ceremony was absolutely beautiful. Karen, Plankton's computer wife had officiated. She got a new download just prior to Spongebob's engagement. Mr. Krabs not only catered the affair, but even offered to hold the wedding at The Krusty Krab.

He said it would be good for business.

Spongebob was dressed to the nines in a black tuxedo (box cut, of course), black dress shoes, and even a top hat. His bride was stunning and glowing in a white Vera Wang wedding gown. Mr. Krabs pulled out all the stops for his daughter's special day. The lady at the thrift store said that the gown was "like new".

Yes, Spongebob had married Pearl, his boss's daughter.

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"I'm horny!" Spongebob declared carrying his new bride over the threshold and towards the heart-shaped bed. "I'm horny, I'm horny, going to get laid... I'm horny!"

Pearl giggled seductively. "Let me get freshened up for you, new husband." She jumped down from Spongebob's arms and walked toward the bathroom, wiggling her hips just so.

"Hurry, sexy lady." Spongebob replied, slapping her on the ass. Pearl blew him a kiss before closing the bathroom door. The very horny Sponge quickly shed his tux and jumped onto the bed, waiting for his new bride to re-enter their love nest.

"How do I look?" Pearl cooed, as she walked seductively towards the bed.

Spongebob immediately sat up in excitement. His young wife was dressed in a silky red negligee, complete with thigh-high fishnets. "You look great..." He ran over to her. "Now take it off."

Pearl was about to sexily obey when an unwelcome knock was heard at the door.

"Who can that be?!" Pearl yelled, as she grabbed a pillow to cover herself.

"I'll shoo them off." Spongebob scowled, as he also covered his "shame" with a fluffy pillow. He walked towards the door and opened it with a huff. "What do you want?!"

"Hi, Spongebob." Patrick gave a gap-toothed grin. "Whatcha doin'?"

Patrick did not just ask that. "I'm on my wedding night, Patrick!" Spongebob replied among sexual frustration. "I'm trying to have sex!"

Patrick raised his eyebrows. "Can I join?"

"No!"

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

Spongebob huffed and looked back at Pearl, who was lying on the bed and testing out one of the complimentary vibrators. He thought for a moment and turned back to his best friend. "Let me get her tipsy first. I'll call you."

The starfish's eyes lit up. "Good luck buddy." Patrick turned and walked down the hallway. Spongebob breathed a sigh of relief and this time locked the door. He turned to Pearl who was "all warmed up" and smiling at him eagerly.

"Get ready, Pearl." Spongebob said as he strutted into the boudouir. " 'Cuz I'm... horny!" And with that, he lept onto the bed, amidst giggles and the sound of sex toys.

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Mystic: I apologize for this. I really do. This was based on a dream I had, believe it or not. Review please! Just don't be too harsh.