Pairing: Addison/Izzie
A/N: Weeks after I expected to post this, it's finally done. Written for addisonmotherfuckingmontgomery (on tumblr), who asked for a fic forever ago. Sorry it took so long, but I hope you enjoy, Rachael. Hope you all enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own anything.
The low knocking on Addison's door makes her look up from the paperwork on her desk, her glasses being removed in one swift motion. "Come in," she answers.
Izzie cracks the door open, popping her head in. "Are you busy?"
Addison smiles, leaning her arms against her mahogany desk. "Too busy for you?" Addison makes a show of pretending to think, humming in her throat as her fingers drum a beat against the desk. Her smile grows, red lipstick painted lips curling up. "No, I think I can spare few minutes."
"Excellent," the intern chirps, fully slipping into the room. "And it just so happens that I come bearing gifts," she says. She closes the door, clicking the lock just in case.
Addison sees the coffee and smiles, leaning back in her chair, pushing back from her desk. "Mmm. Coffee. You sure do know the way to please a woman."
Izzie smirks, coming around the desk, putting the coffees to the side for a minute. She swats Addison's leg so she uncrosses them. "I'm sure there are other ways," she starts and slowly straddles Addison's lap, "that I can please you." Izzie grins as she leans in closer to Addison.
Addison slides her hands up Izzie's thighs, over the fabric of her scrubs. "Well," Addison drags out slowly, tilting her head.
"Well," the blonde parrots, her lips brushing Addison's.
"Hmm. Is this what you came here for? You wanted to distract me from work with kisses?"
Izzie's smile turns into a playful pout. "What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn't come to show you I'm thinking about you?"
Addison's heart warms in her chest, the simple term making her feel a rush of happiness. It's only been a month, but Addison's enjoying this thing they have. The coffees, the kissing, the nights they spend together whenever they can, and the sensations that move throughout her are all the things Addison has been needing in life. It was just the night before that Izzie brought up the term, whispering into the redhead's ear as they were making out - "God, you're the best girlfriend," she had moaned through kisses placed against Addison's neck. They had never spoken about what they were, but instead of finding it presumptuous, Addison thought it was adorable.
"Is that all you came here for?" Addison asks, softly kissing Izzie's lips. She always tastes like strawberries and cherries, sweet and delicious. Addison has gotten lost in the taste of Izzie's lips many times before. "A few kisses and some coffee?"
"Not exactly," Izzie replies sheepishly, her fingers gently caressing the side of her girlfriend's face.
"How did I know that was too good to be true?"
"Maybe because you're some type of genius surgeon that knows everything," Izzie jokes, laughing lightly.
"Or," Addison stretches out slowly, "maybe I can just tell when you have something up your sleeve." Izzie hums, smiling widely.
Izzie cups Addison's face and keeps her eyes open as she presses her lips to Addison's, softly kissing her. The sound of a low hum in the back of Addison's throat makes the blonde grin against her mouth, kissing the attending a little harder and shutting her eyes. The tender stroke of Addison's tongue against Izzie's mouth makes a little shiver move up Izzie's spine, a pleasant tingle. The blonde parts her lips and lets her girlfriend's tongue slip into her mouth, licking sensually as their hands caress slowly. For a moment she almost forgets why she's there.
"I wanna spend Christmas with you," Izzie says against Addison's mouth as they kiss. Addison bites Izzie's lip accidentally. "Ow!"
"You want to spend Christmas with me?" she asks incredulously.
Izzie licks her lip, soothing it. "I'll have to remember to make sure I'm not kissing you the next time I ask you something," she says, receiving a sympathetic look from Addison.
"So," she says as she clears her throat, "what's this about Christmas?"
Izzie sighs as she gets up, passing one of the coffee cups to Addison and taking the other for herself as she leans against the edge of the desk. She crosses her legs at the ankles, one of her hands stuffed in the pocket of her lab coat. "I mean, it's a few days away and you haven't even brought it up. Would it really be so terrible if we spent it together?"
Addison opens her mouth to respond, but abruptly shuts it when Izzie's pager goes off. She feels bad for feeling relieved, but she can't help that she's not exactly in the holiday spirit anymore. She watches as Izzie's shoulders slump, her lips forming a frown as she clips her pager back on her scrubs and stands up fully.
"It's my patient." Addison nods. "Can we talk about this later?"
Addison nods again. "Yeah, of course."
Izzie leans down and presses a kiss to Addison's inviting mouth, a gorgeous smile developing. "Maybe you can come over later." Addison's face falls quickly and Izzie knows exactly what it is. "Everyone's gonna be out of the house," she adds.
"Let me think about it." Izzie sighs as she stands up properly. "Now you need to get out of here and go be the brilliant doctor we both know you are," she says, wiping lipstick from Izzie's lips.
"Flattery and being cute won't make me forget you didn't answer me, Dr. Montgomery," she whispers, kissing Addison's fingertips.
"We'll talk later," she says as Izzie finally leaves, smiling over her shoulder as she walks out of the office.
Once alone, Addison sighs. Thanksgiving she luckily had been stuck in a surgery, and she and Izzie were still in that transitioning phase, moving from friendship to being in a romantic relationship. There weren't many expectations, nor did she feel obligated to do anything other than agree to Izzie spending the night at her hotel after the blonde had her dinner with her friends.
But now, after the month they spent together, she feels like having Izzie want to spend Christmas with her shows not only what kind of relationship Izzie clearly wants with her, but also what she means to the younger woman. Up until now, Addison wasn't certain about where things were going; it's fun and new, but Addison knows how quickly that can change. Feeling a little reassurance, Addison can feel the joy of the holidays slowly creeping its way back, thoughts of Christmas lights and Christmas music making her sway a little in her office chair as she gets back to work.
...
Throughout the rest of the day, Izzie's thinking about Addison. She hadn't any surgeries, leaving her plenty of time to study and think. Normally it wasn't so easy to get distracted, but she'd been excited and a bit worry about asking Addison to spend Christmas with her. Everyone else has plans for Christmas - conveniently, she thinks. And as much as she loves surgery, she wants someone to spend the holiday with, exchange presents and enjoy the day with. And that person she wants is Addison, which is what she spent a lot of the time thinking about.
Now she's standing in the lobby, waiting for Addison to finish up so they can leave together. They had spoken briefly in passing, where Addison said she would rather they go to her hotel room instead of to the house. While Izzie would prefer they go back to the house, being that everybody else is on-call, she understands why Addison doesn't want to be around anything relating to Meredith.
"Waiting for somebody?" Izzie hears husked against her ear, instantly making her smile and turn around. She has the urge to lean in and kiss Addison, but knows that it's against their unspoken rules. They still haven't told anyone about them, so public displays of affection aren't something they have often.
"Hmm. Maybe," she says, sing-song tone making Addison smile at her.
"Anybody special?" Addison asks in a low voice.
The intern nods enthusiastically. "Yes, very special. A cute redhead said she would meet me here."
"Oh, cute. Hm, I see." Addison steps closer, just close enough so only Izzie can hear her. "I hope she won't mind that I plan on taking you home with me tonight instead."
"Well," Izzie says, her voice matching Addison's. "That all depends on what you plan on doing with me once you get me home. I wouldn't want to get her jealous or anything."
Addison licks her lips and then looks around them. She straightens her back and then starts walking away, her voice even lower as she quickly leans into Izzie's ear. "I plan on doing very, very dirty things to you."
Izzie gulps and catches the sparkle in Addison's blue-green eyes. Izzie clears her throat, grinning. "Well I can't turn that down," she calls after her, eagerly following Addison to her car.
Addison unlocks the car and they get in quickly, looking at each other after they both put their bags in the back. Addison smiles her fingers brushing Izzie's hand before she puts her key in the ignition and starts the car. The radio starts playing music, but Addison turns it off, needing a little bit of peace after the long, complicated surgery she had earlier.
"Are you hungry?" Addison asks, letting the car warm up. Izzie rubs her stomach, nodding her head. "You want to stop for dinner somewhere, maybe bring it back to the hotel? Or we can do room service."
"The sound of anything other than granola bars and fruit sounds good to me right now," Izzie says with a soft laugh that floats in the air.
"I think I know just what you need."
...
With an exaggerated sigh, Izzie flops down on the bed later on in the night. She rests her hands on her stomach, the soft material of her blue long-sleeved henley top the only thing between her and the fullness she feels in her belly. Even after her long, hot shower, Izzie can still feel the effects of her overeating. Addison had taken her to one of their favorite places to go to together: an Italian restaurant who, according to them both, has the best lasagna. Once they sat down, Izzie had known she wouldn't be getting up until she absolutely couldn't eat anymore.
The bathroom door opens. Izzie turns her head towards it, feeling too full to move anything else. White steam leaves the bathroom, followed by a flushed Addison, darkened hair pulled over one plush robe covered shoulder. Brown eyes rake over Addison, unabashedly admiring her. Izzie's always liked Addison like this: face washed clean, hair wet and starting to curl a little at the ends, skin blotched red from the heat.
Addison laughs at the hungry look on the younger woman's face, waiting for Izzie's eyes to look up and meet her own. "See something you like, Stevens?" she husks, licking her lips.
Izzie feels herself blush slightly as she nods slowly. The expression Addison gets is somewhere between affectionate and predatory. Izzie smiles and crooks her index finger, silently telling Addison to come to her. Despite not having the energy to do much of anything at the moment, Izzie has been trying to push away the burning desire running through her veins all day. And now that Addison's a few feet away, naked under her robe, looking just as sexy as ever, she can't wait any longer to have her hands on Addison.
Addison sees the lust in warm brown eyes and almost walks over to the bed. Almost. She swallows her own want, knowing there's a conversation they need to have first, even though it wouldn't be that hard for her to put that off longer and join the leggy blonde in her bed.
"Not yet, Stevens."
"What? Why?" she whines. She groans when Addison walks back into the bathroom.
Addison emerges from the bathroom with a jar of body cream. "Because," she says slowly, walking over to the queen-sized bed, "you asked me something earlier."
"About Christmas?" Izzie asks, suddenly perking up. Her eyes brighten, and her smile widens, white teeth showcased completely.
Addison can't help her own smile, an instant reaction to the blonde's. She places the jar on the bed and stands in front of Izzie, running warm hands over Izzie's cool thighs. Izzie sighs and parts her legs, giving Addison space to stand between them.
"Yes, about Christmas," Addison answers, looking up from the long legs only covered by cotton shorts and goose bumps. She pulls them closer to her as she meets Izzie's gaze.
Izzie sits up slightly, resting on bent arms behind her. "I've been thinking about it, too. And I just wanted to tell you that I understand if you don't want to because you don't like Christmas."
Addison furrows her brow slightly, wondering if this is Izzie's way of trying to take the offer off the table. Although she hadn't brought it back up again until now, Addison had thought about it many times during the course of the day. She had even started to look forward to Christmas again; since the moment she noticed Christmas was coming up, she'd been dreading the day. Addison had been expecting to be spending it alone, and it's hard being in the holiday spirit when you have nobody to share the joy with.
"Oh," is all Addison says.
Izzie watches the emotion in Addison's eyes change, the light in them dimming. Addison goes to move from the space in front of Addison, but Izzie wraps her legs around her and keeps her there. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong," Addison says surely, but she can tell from the look the intern gives her that Izzie doesn't buy it. Addison's stuck between being intrigued because Izzie knows her so well and a little... Addison's not even sure what it is she feels - but she knows in the beginning it would have bothered her a lot more than it does now.
With her weight being held up with one arm, Izzie reaches forward and takes one of Addison's hands into her own. She looks down at it with fascination for a moment, her thumb grazing knuckles as the corners of her mouth quirk up. She pulls Addison's hand to her mouth and lets her lips brush over the same warm skin her finger had just touch. A soft, almost hidden sigh escapes Addison's now-parted lips, much to Izzie's liking.
"What is it?" Izzie asks, placing a kiss a little higher on Addison's hand.
Addison can tell Izzie's becoming less attentive as the moments go by, and she herself is finding it hard to say how she honestly feels when Izzie's legs are wrapped around her and the intern's lips are softly dropping kisses up her arm. Addison pulls away, slowly. She wraps her arms around herself for a moment, feeling goose bumps breakout on her skin. Izzie sits up, but she doesn't say anything as she waits.
"I do like Christmas," Addison tells her. "I just wasn't expecting you to want to spend it with me, since it's only been a month."
"Oh," Izzie says, the light in her eyes fading, and Addison can tell she's said something wrong.
"What I mean is, I just assumed that we would wait longer before spending holidays together."
Izzie stands up from the bed, saying, "I get it."
Great, Addison thinks. This conversation doesn't seem to be anything other than wrong choices of words.
"What are you doing?" Addison asks as Izzie walks over to her things, pulling out her jeans. "Are you leaving?"
Izzie doesn't look at Addison as she pulls her shorts off. "I'd rather be home tonight." That's not what she really wants to say. What she wants to say is: "I don't want to be here with you right now." Izzie feels like she made a mistake by even bringing up Christmas. Everything had been going perfectly up until then.
Addison doesn't move from where she's standing, nor does she watch Izzie pack up her things and go. It's all happened before, not with Izzie, but to Addison. In a way, Addison assumes she should have known it would happen again. You can only go so long before something goes wrong.
Izzie lifts her bag up to her shoulder and then walks around to the other side of the bed, places a hand on Addison's rigid shoulder and then leans in to kiss Addison goodnight. It's almost unnoticed - almost - but Addison flinches right before Izzie's lips touch hers. "I'll, uhm..."
"Yeah," Addison says, staying put as Izzie leaves. Once she's alone, Addison falls down to the bed, closing her eyes and letting out a deep breath.
...
Addison wakes to the sound of her alarm going off. She buries her head deeper into her pillow and squeezes her eyes shut tightly, blindly reaching out her left hand to hit the snooze button. After last night, Addison's at least going to give herself a few extra minutes in bed. A few minutes where she can just forget about the doctors at Seattle Grace. A few minutes for her to be...
Alone.
Addison groans and pushes herself up from the bed, settling on her knees as her hands slide over her face. Who is she kidding? She can't sleep, she can't rest, and even though she's physically the only person in the bed, she's not alone. The smell of Izzie's shampoo, as always, lingers, trying to become a permanent scent in Addison's bed. And the chill in her bones makes her think about the warm body that had been there with her the night before.
Alone, Addison realizes, she is not.
There's two things she can do right now. One: Addison can lie back down and stay in the bed until she absolutely has to get up and go into work. Or, two: Addison can get up, take a shower, put on something that makes her feel like her normal self, and go into work like there's nothing bothering her. The first idea is tempting. Very, very tempting. But in the end, Addison decides to go with the second.
...
"Is it really that hard not to drink all the coffee?!" Izzie shouts from the kitchen, slamming down the empty coffee pot a little harder than she should. She just wants some goddamn coffee.
The kitchen door opens and a cautious Meredith appears. Izzie rolls her eyes at the sight of the other woman. This is all her fault. How? Izzie doesn't know. But she needs to blame somebody, and everything can somehow boil down to it being Meredith's fault.
"Why are you yelling?" Meredith asks, coming over to the counter, pushing Izzie out of the way so she can make some coffee. "What's wrong?"
"I want some coffee. Can't a person want coffee in the morning without it being a big deal?" Izzie groans, putting down her mug. "Why does everyone think things means something entirely different from what they actually mean?"
Meredith turns around quickly, her eyes finding Izzie's brown angry ones. "Iz..."
Izzie lets out a deep sigh. "Why are relationships so complicated? I mean, yeah, we all come with baggage, and we all have things we don't say, but really..." Izzie sits down on one of the seats and groans throatily as she thumps her head down on the kitchen island. "Why is dating someone so hard?"
Meredith's eyes widen and then her brow furrows in confusion a second later. "Wait. You're seeing somebody?"
Izzie's head pops up as if she hadn't even known she had said that aloud. She stares at Meredith, who stares back with the same amount of intensity. Izzie feels her stomach muscles tighten as she tries to think of something to say, and then her heart nearly pushes out of her chest when she realizes that all that comes to mind is Addison.
"Izzie?"
The kitchen door opens again and a disheveled Alex walks in. Izzie turns to him, eyes big and wide. Alex stops, one hand under his gray tank, scratching his stomach. He looks from Izzie to Meredith, and then back to Izzie. He quirks his eyebrow.
"What?" he asks.
Izzie shakes her head and turns away from him, looking down to the wood surface in front of her, wanting to bang her head against it again.
"What?" he asks again, this time looking at Meredith.
"Izzie's seeing someone," she answers.
"Mere," Izzie yelps, her cheeks flaming red. "I never said I was seeing someone. And even if I had been, it's so over now. So, so over."
"Is there coffee?" Alex asks, ignoring whatever it is he's just walked into. "I'm running late."
Meredith steps away from the coffee maker and walks over to Izzie. "So who's this mystery guy?"
"There is no mystery guy," Izzie answers, and that much is at least the truth. Meredith doesn't believe her, though. "Don't give me that look. I know that look."
"What look?" asks Meredith, leaning down on her arms, tilting her head towards Izzie.
"That look you get when you think you know something, even when you really don't."
"I don't have a look."
"Yes you do," Alex says from behind them.
Meredith rolls her eyes. "Fine. I have a look." Meredith stands up, going to get a bowl for some cereal. "But you can't tell me you're not seeing someone."
Izzie gets up; she's not going to have this conversation, not with Meredith. "I'm going to go finished getting ready," she huffs under her breath.
...
"What's her problem?" Cristina asks, pulling her scrub top on in the locker room.
"Boy problems," Meredith answers with a shrug.
George looks over to Izzie, who's sitting down, her hands cradling her head. "Boy problems?"
"Mhm," Meredith hums, shutting her locker.
Izzie gets up quickly. "Is this really all you guys know how to do? Are your lives really so boring that we all have to worry about what's wrong with me? Can't I just be having a bad day?" All the way to the hospital they talked about this, on the way up to the locker room, and now again. Izzie's more annoyed about that than she is about anything else that's happened recently.
"Of course you can," George says after swallowing harshly, guilt coloring his skin. "We're your friends, we're just-"
"Worried," Meredith finishes.
"I'm fine," Izzie huffs.
"Okay, then-"
"No, I'm not fine," Izzie interrupts. "It's almost Christmas, and-" Meredith and George share a look of pure horror "I just wanted to do something fun this year. There's no decorations up. George is going to be with Callie." Izzie scrunches up her nose with distaste. "You're not going to be home," she says to Meredith, and then she turns to Cristina.
"Don't look at me," she says.
Izzie rolls her eyes. "See. And I was okay with all of this because I was going to have plans."
"Oh," Meredith and George say together.
"But apparently I'm moving too fast, or whatever." Izzie feels angry at herself, irrationally so. "This is stupid. I shouldn't have even said anything." Izzie turns away.
Meredith, Cristina, and George all stay silent. Meredith nudges George, who jumps slightly. "How about we, uhm, do something together?" Meredith glares at him, and he sighs.
Izzie shakes her head. "No, it's fine."
Meredith feels a wave of relief wash over her, even though she knows that maybe they should insist. But they all know that when it comes down to it, Christmas is Izzie's thing. Besides, like Izzie said, they all have plans.
"I'm going to go get ready for rounds," Izzie says, leaving them in the locker room.
...
"And why was I not notified of this change earlier?" Addison asks, flipping through the chart of one of her patients. She looks up, eyebrow arched as the nurse in front of her looks back with something akin to terror in his dark brown eyes. He stutters a response, but she's no longer listening.
Blonde hair and a rapidly walking Izzie catches her eyes instead, just as Izzie looks her way. Despite how last night ended, Addison feels a pull inside of her, one that the look on Izzie's face causes. Without muttering a word to the nurse, Addison's walking away, chart being left at the nurses station.
"Dr. Stevens," Addison calls when Izzie starts walking away.
Izzie doesn't slow down, so Addison walks faster. Her Mary Janes click loudly on the hospital floor as she hurries after the intern, a whirl of red hair moving with her as they round a corner. She's not even sure what she wants to say to Izzie, or why she's following her. Except, Addison knows she needs to speak to her, and she needs to follow her.
"Stevens, wait."
"Dr. Montgomery, I-"
Addison reaches forward as she takes a wide step, wrapping her hand around Izzie's arm, pulling Izzie to her. Izzie stumbles, and the words she's saying die on her tongue as Addison spins her around so they're facing each other, the feeling of rushed breaths meeting faces. Addison looks around them and then pulls her into the closest room to them - a supply closet.
Addison shuts the door with more force than necessary, but it's her that is pushed against it. She feels the air leave her lungs as her back collides with the door, a tinge of pain shooting up her spine at the unexpected movement. Before she can ask Izzie what the hell she is doing, she feels the intern's body against her own, pressed tightly - breasts against breasts, stomach against stomach, Addison's hips against Izzie's.
Izzie is done being upset about last night (she decided this somewhere between the conversation in the locker room and the one she was forced to have during lunch), but that doesn't mean everything's okay. And from the way Addison is looking at her - eyes growing darker, turning more of a green than a blue, lips slightly parted, features left blank - Addison isn't sure what's going through Izzie's mind. Izzie reaches up with her left hand, sliding it up Addison's slender neck, feeling the redhead's pulse quicken as her thumb glides over her throat. Izzie licks her lips and studies Addison's face, waiting for her to say or do something, but other than the quickening of her pulse and the thudding of Addison's heart against her own, Addison doesn't do anything.
Addison's head tilts back until it's all the way against the door, her eyes leaving Izzie's and going to the ceiling. Izzie's hand continues up her neck and to her face, fingers grazing her jaw. Addison tries swallowing once the pressure from her neck is gone, but her throat has gone dry. The silence around them is loud, more like pounding and banging than the emptiness it should be. And Izzie's breath is hot against her face, making her skin prickle and her body heat all over.
Izzie's thumb presses to the corner of Addison's mouth. The attending lets out a shaky breath. Izzie traces Addison's lip with her thumb, feeling the way it slides against lipstick-covered skin. Addison still doesn't look at her, or say anything, but her breath is coming out heavier and she can feel Addison's hips pushing into her own. Her thumb pushes into Addison's mouth, being met with heat and moisture, and presses down. She looks up to Addison's eyes, but they're closed. Still, she feels lips wrap around her finger and Addison slowly sucking, making Izzie's breath catch in her throat.
Izzie's free hand slips between the two of them, sliding up Addison's abdomen, her touch neither gentle or hard. She lays her hand over Addison's breast, feeling the other woman's teeth slightly dig in into her finger. Izzie squeezes the soft flesh beneath the white button down shirt, hearing Addison moan, although it sounds like she's still trying to appear unaffected by the touch. Izzie squeezes firmly and leans in to Addison's neck, the smell of her shampoo making Izzie breathe her in deeply.
Addison squeezes her hands tightly in fists when Izzie's nose nudges the side of her neck and then a slow kiss is pressed against her skin. One kiss turns into two, which turns into three, which leads to Izzie's lips dancing across every bare inch of skin from Addison's chest to ear. Addison's finding it hard to breathe, hard to do anything. Everything feels amazing and hot and... God! Izzie's finger comes out of her mouth and, without much warning, she feels Izzie's lips on her own, just as the hand on her breast squeezes tightly again.
It's with a surprised moan that their lips meet. Addison's too busy trying to figure out what's going on that she barely notices that Izzie puts space between them and is starting to pull her shirt from her skirt and unbutton it. But then, when Izzie's lips leave hers and drag against her hot skin and head to her breasts, Addison feels everything at once. Izzie's tongue zigzags over the top of one of her breasts, all the while her hand pulls the bra cup from the other and two fingers begin slowly, but roughly, rolling over her nipple.
"Izzie," she moans, finally looking at the intern. Brown eyes are darkened with lust, but there's something else there. There's pain and hurt, and Addison knows something's wrong. "What are you-"
Addison moans when Izzie twists her fingers around an achingly hard nipple. The pleasurable pain ripples through her and settles between her thighs. Addison's eyes fall shut, but she's not going to do this. Not like this. She's not going to let sex be the answer to a problem - not with Izzie.
"Stop," she whispers, the moan following the word making it sound like she really doesn't want Izzie to stop. But the hand that pushes on Izzie's shoulder, pushing her lightly, shows she means it.
Izzie moves away, not meeting Addison's gaze as she lets her blonde hair free from its ponytail. She runs her fingers through her hair to keep them busy. She hopes that Addison doesn't notice the way her fingers tremble, or the way she can't meet her eyes.
"Izzie?"
"What?" she answers, trying to keep all emotion out of her tone. Because that's what Addison wants, right? She's moving too fast, and she's doing things the wrong way. So that must mean Addison wants it to be like it used to be: sex in on-call rooms, nothing other than fulfilling the carnal desires. That's what Addison wants, so why is she stopping her?
Addison takes a few moments to catch her breath and fix her clothes, looking at Izzie. Her heart is still pounding in her chest, a pulsing she also feels between her legs, where she knows she's wet. It would be so easy to bring Izzie back to her, tell her to keep going, but Addison realizes she doesn't truly want that. She finally feels like she's in a relationship with someone who wants her and nobody else, and she wants it to last. So if that's going to happen, they need to talk.
"What's going on here?" she asks, because it's the only thing she can think to say.
"I'm sorry."
"Izzie," she says softly. It's not an apology she wants. "You have nothing to be sorry for."
Izzie shakes her head, looking down at the floor. This is worse than her friends questioning her all day. This is Addison, and Addison is the reason she has no idea what she's doing anymore. "I shouldn't have-" She stops abruptly when warm fingers lift her head by her chin.
Addison leans forward and lets her lips lightly brush over Izzie's, slowly and gently. A soft "mmmm" is made as Izzie tries to deepen the kiss, but Addison pulls away, opening her eyes to meet Izzie's. She smiles at Izzie, letting her fingers delicately brush against the side of Izzie's face before pulling back.
Izzie wants to look away, because Addison's eyes look like they hold all the love in the world, and Izzie might just drown in them if she keeps staring. But she's captivated, and maybe drowning isn't all that bad. The thought makes her finally smile, a breath leaving her body that clears her mind a little.
"I'm sorry," she says again.
Instead of telling her again that she doesn't need to apologize, she says something else. "For what?" she asks.
Izzie lets out an exaggerated breath. "Last night. I'm rushing things, and I... Uhm."
Addison feels the same tightening in chest that she felt last night, but this time she understands. She understands that they're having two separate conversations. Izzie's under the impression that Addison doesn't want to spend Christmas with her because it's only been a month. And up until Addison thought about it, she had been under the impression that Izzie no longer wanted to spend the day with her. But Addison realizes they both want the same thing.
"That's what all this about?" Addison asks in a compassionate tone.
Izzie takes a step back and carefully leans against the cool metal holding the medical supplies. She shrugs her shoulders and decides that she either says it or she leaves. She decides to stay.
"Do you want to slow things down? I mean... I guess... Is this because I called you my girlfriend the other day, so now it's not just sex? Because I can..." Izzie closes her eyes, because just having Addison look at her like that makes her feel like she's not going to be able to say what she's been thinking. "If you want things to go back to the way they were, I understand." She lowers her voice a little and adds, "I just thoughts things were working."
Addison stays quiet for far too long. Izzie feels like she's going to be sick if the other woman doesn't speak. She still can't bear to open her eyes, so she's not even sure if Addison's looking at her, or whatever. It's just silent.
"Addison," Izzie starts, but is interrupted by Addison saying, "I want to spend Christmas with you."
Brown eyes pop open. "Seriously?" she asks, because she can't be too sure.
Addison lets out a sigh of relief. "Yes," she answers simply.
"But I thought..." Izzie shakes her head, deciding it's best not to elaborate farther than she already has. "Are you sure?"
Addison feels that familiar warmth in her chest at the sight of Izzie's smile. Perhaps things are going to be okay, she thinks. "I'm sure. I'd love to spend Christmas with you."
...
Izzie's in the kitchen Christmas Eve afternoon, the house almost empty. She's humming to Christmas music, wearing Christmas light printed pajama pants, and she's been cooking for an hour. The house, not including the barely decorated tree, is undecorated, and everybody is planning on staying far away. But Izzie's in a bright, bubbly mood - because everything is still perfect.
Meredith walks into the kitchen, dressed in scrubs. "Izzie," she starts cautiously.
Izzie's humming stops, but the big smile that's been in place since she woke up stays. "Relax. I'm not going to make you stay here."
Meredith looks away guiltily. "So your mystery guy..."
Izzie's smile falters, but then she turns away and to the dinner she's making for the night. Something simple, because it's only the day before Christmas and they'll be plenty of time for cooking tomorrow. "You guys said you wouldn't ask questions," she reminds.
Meredith goes into the freezer, getting out the bottle of water she stuck in there earlier. "We said we would give you the privacy you asked for. So we're all staying away from the house."
Izzie rolls her eyes and covers the pot back up, turning the stove off. "None of you were going to be here, anyway." Izzie lifts herself up to sit on the kitchen island, red sock-covered feet swinging. "Besides, I told you: there's no mystery guy."
"Iz-"
"No, Mere. No questions. Just let me enjoy Christmas," she says, her fingers tapping along with the sound of All I Want For Christmas. The song makes her feel all warm and tingly when Addison comes to her mind. As a result, her cheeks flush slightly.
"Fine," Meredith agrees, raising her hands in surrender. "I have to get going."
Izzie nods. "Don't forget to take the cupcakes with you," she says, ignoring the groan Meredith makes when she looks over to the batch of Christmas cupcakes that were made in the middle of the night when excitement woke Izzie up. "I'm sure somebody will appreciate all my hard work."
"Bye, Izzie," Meredith says with a smile and a playful roll of her eyes.
"Merry Christmas," she sings.
...
Addison's leaving the hospital, checking her watch to make sure she has time to stop at her hotel and get her stuff, when she bumps into the second to last person she wants to see. Literally bumps into them. The smile on her face falls and a new expression takes over. Gone is the cheerful look that had been there all day, because it's Christmas Eve and she's about to be with Izzie, and in its place is an almost blank look. Seeping through the cracks is discomfort, though.
"Dr. Montgomery," squeaks the voice that belongs to none other than Meredith Grey.
"I'm sorry," Addison rushes out.
"No, it was my fault." She holds up the trays of cupcakes. "Izzie made cupcakes, and I can't see, and..."
"It's fine. Be careful," Addison says awkwardly; as much as she wishes they weren't, things are always awkward between them. "Merry Christmas, Grey," Addison says, turning and leaving. She has places to be.
...
The doorbell rings and Izzie bites her lip, looking up to the clock. It's almost five o'clock, which means that it's most likely Addison. A happy squeal escapes the blonde as she puts down the box of decorations and rushes to the door, sliding against the wood floor as she rushes to the door. She smiles brightly at Addison through the glass of the door as she unlocks and opens it, barely giving the older woman time to get in before her arms are thrown around Addison.
"Hey," Addison rushes out in a breath, being pulled into both the house and Izzie's warm embrace. She can't help herself when she closes her eyes and hugs Izzie, almost as eagerly as Izzie's hugging her, breathing in the smell of Izzie's skin. She smells sweet and delicious, yet warm and dark. "You smell good."
Izzie scrunches her nose up and ends their hug. "I've been cooking and bringing down decorations," she says. She wipes her forehead with the back of her hand, brushing away her bangs.
Addison shrugs. "I still think you smell good."
Izzie smiles and closes the door. She watches Addison scan the living room, the boxes with lights, tinsel, and other various decorations, the bare tree, and the sofa pushed out of the way, pillows and movies on top of it. The way Addison smiles when her attention is brought back to Izzie is nothing short of magnificent. There's hope and the beginning of something wonderful.
Once Izzie puts Addison's things in her room, they eat dinner. Izzie's listening to Addison's first Christmas on her own, how much of a disaster it turned out to be. Addison laughs a lot more when she talks about this than she does when Izzie asks about Christmases as a child, so Izzie knows that's something she doesn't really want to talk about. And Addison can tell that the same goes for Izzie; childhood Christmases aren't to be discussed. And they are both fine with that, because there is so much more to talk about and do, and really, it's Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve, the day before Christmas, and they couldn't be happier.
"Okay," Addison says as she's hanging up a round, shiny ornament. She looks around the tree to Izzie, smiling before she grabs another one, a red and gold one that has Santa on it; Addison likes it. "They always showed Scrooge (A Christmas Carol) on Christmas Eve, maybe an hour or so before midnight."
From her side of the tree, Izzie nods, listening with bright eyes. "So every year you watched it." It's a statement, not really a question.
"Of course," Addison says with a wide smile, grabbing a few more ornaments and walking over to Izzie's side. "It became a tradition," she says, her smile not losing its brightness. "Chinese food and Scrooge."
"Ooh, festive," Izzie teases, kissing Addison on the cheek and plucking one of the little Santa head ornaments from her.
Addison rolls her eyes. "Please, do tell me about your traditions, since mine aren't impressive enough."
Izzie pauses, looking at the tree thoughtfully. The mood shifts, but before Addison can say anything to quickly change the topic, Izzie answers. "I've never really had any real traditions before, not really." And it's said with so much sadness that Addison audibly swallows and puts a hand on Izzie's shoulder to slowly rub. "It's okay, though."
"It is not," Addison says immediately.
Izzie looks over her shoulder and offers the redhead a smile, even though it doesn't truly meet her eyes. "Okay. But there's nothing I can do about it now."
Addison leans in and places a soft kiss to Izzie's mouth. Without even thinking about what she's saying, Addison murmurs: "We can start some traditions together." But the bright, starry thing that's going on with Izzie's eyes: Addison would promise Izzie a whole lot to see that more often.
"I'd love that," Izzie whispers before turning around and wrapping her arms around Addison.
Addison's breath catches in her throat before her eyelids flutter and she pulls Izzie closer. Not only is she incredibly happy with Izzie, she can also feel her joy for the holidays. Her holiday spirit is back, and it's all because of Izzie and promises for more good to come in their future.
...
Izzie smiles as she looks at Addison over her shoulder. "What are you doing?" she asks through laughs. Lips that tickle as they brush against the back of her neck, kissing random spots, make her laughs turn to full giggles.
Addison raises her eyebrows suggestively as she wraps her hands around Izzie and slides them under her shirt. She can feel Izzie slightly shiver as her fingers lightly brush over Izzie's hips. Her skin is warm and smooth under Addison's touch. Addison hums contently against the side of Izzie's neck, right below the blonde's ear, and slides her hand up the flat plane of Izzie's stomach.
"Addie," Izzie whispers, the spoon in her hand being dropped back into the bowl of cookie dough.
Addison's hands continue to creep up until she reaches the undersides of Izzie's full breasts. Warm flesh, bare and not covered by a bra. Addison doesn't miss the small moan that forms in Izzie's throat, or the way her eyelids get heavy as she looks away. Addison especially doesn't miss the way Izzie pushes back into her body, silently telling her to keep going.
"Addie," Izzie says again, this time in a deep moan. Her head is clouding with delicious pleasure and Addison's fingers are so warm and soft against her skin. Her heart is pounding, and much lower the pulsating is being mirrored.
Addison licks a strong, wet path up the side of Izzie's neck and palms her breasts tightly. "Tell me what you want me to do," she purrs into Izzie's ear. Izzie shivers against her, just as she begins kneading the firm flesh of Izzie's breasts.
Izzie moans and grips the side of the counter. She feels heat engulf her. Addison's mouth is all over her neck and ear, licking and sucking, kissing and nibbling. And... "God," she groans. Her nipples tingle deliciously as Addison brings them between her fingers and rolls and tugs. Each delicious pull creates a pleasurable pain that starts at her breasts and settles where she's quickly becoming wet and hot.
"Is that what you want?" Addison asks between rough nips to the side of Izzie's neck. The heat of the kitchen and her own body temperature is making Izzie sweat. Her skin tastes salty beneath Addison's lips and tongue. She moans and sinks her teeth into sensitive spot on Izzie's neck, biting tender flesh before sucking it soothingly.
Izzie's knees turn into jelly and she has to grip the counter tighter so she doesn't fall over. Oh, the things Addison's doing to her body are absolutely sinful. She bites down on her bottom lip, dragging her teeth against it roughly as she rolls her hips. Her ass presses harder into Addison and her chest arches into Addison's hands.
"Hm?" Addison breathes against Izzie's ear, teasingly. "Tell me. Is this what you want?"
Thinking, speaking, anything other than moving her body into all the magnificent feelings she's experiencing is too hard for Izzie to do. But she feels Addison slow down, and Izzie knows she'll come to a complete stop if she doesn't get an answer. Izzie's pounding heart goes faster, her blood rushing as well as her breath.
Lip still clamped between her teeth, she murmurs, "Yes."
"Are you sure, dear?" Addison asks in a sultry tone that does more to Izzie than the feeling of Addison's hands sliding down her stomach. "Because I have a feeling you want so much more."
One hand slips into Izzie's pajamas, feeling smooth skin beneath her fingers. They both sharply inhale as Addison curls her fingers and slips them through the sticky wetness that awaits her. Izzie spreads her legs more and grinds down into Addison's hand, whimpering. Addison had planned on teasing her, but now she just wants to hear Izzie moan as she comes.
It's all friction in the right places and heat and warmth and fast breaths. Izzie slides the cookie dough away and leans over the island, her breasts pushed into the hard surface, her erect nipples rubbing against it with every jerk of her body. Addison's arm is wrapped around her and two fingers are rolling over her clitoris. Side to side, up and down, and in circles. Izzie pants and moans and submits herself to the pleasure making her body feel like it's on fire. Addison's lips are still on her, her words whispers Izzie can't comprehend. And all Izzie can do is stand there, bent over the kitchen island, unable to do much of anything.
Addison can feel Izzie getting closer, each tremor leaving Izzie's body and meeting her own. Addison could give her what she wants, make her come just like this. But, Addison doesn't want that. Addison's been hungry for that taste of the blonde in her mouth for more than a week, and she's going to have her before she comes. Addison's mouth is going to be the reason Izzie falls apart, and that thought makes Addison growl into Izzie's ear before she pulls her hand out of Izzie's pajamas.
It's like she's suffocating, like heat has surrounded her, wrapped her up, and won't let go. She tries to breathe when she feels Addison's hand slip away, eliciting a whimper and making a needy look form in clouded brown eyes. But breathing is hard; she gasps and her lungs constrict almost painfully. And then when Addison turns her around, while also sinking down to her knees in front of Izzie, even the little desperate breaths are impossible. Her face drains of all color, and so do her knuckles as she grips the edge of the counter. Addison pulls down her pajamas and takes them off of Izzie, and Izzie's lightheaded and sure she's going to faint, or something equally as embarrassing.
But then, just when Izzie's sure she's a goner, Addison smiles up at her and then leans in and sticks out her tongue to fully lick over the wet folds of flesh between Izzie's legs. "Oh my god," Izzie breathes shakily, gasping before pulling in hurried breaths.
"And here I was thinking all of you thought I was the devil," she whispers with a grin before bringing her mouth fully to Izzie's center.
All words die on Izzie's tongue, because Addison freaking Montgomery is a lot of things. But right now she's the woman who's licking between Izzie's folds, over her clit, and teasing her entrance. And that, above everything else, is what is important.
Addison can't help but moan into the warm, wet flesh between Izzie's shaky thighs. She tastes delicious, all earthy and spicy; she smells equally as good. Addison splays her hand out on Izzie's stomach and helps keep her steady, letting her other hand draw nonsensical patterns on every inch of skin she feels. Addison's eyes darken as she looks up from her space on the floor, catching Izzie's gaze. Sweaty and breathing heavily, Izzie's gorgeous. And when Addison wraps her lips around the blood engorged clit her fingers had previously been rolling against, Izzie's head falls back and she moans, her mouth open widely, looking even more beautiful.
It's only moments before Izzie's hips are rocking back and forth, grinding into Addison's mouth. She's fucking her face unapologetically, so close to reaching that sweet release. "Please," she moans; what she's asking for is unknown, but she knows Addison will find a way to give it to her somehow. "Oh, please," she moans again, desperately.
With her right hand, Addison spreads Izzie's folds apart and licks strongly up and down, slow, right before she sucks Izzie's clitoris back into her mouth. The throbbing bundle of nerves is rubbed with smooth lips and tongued with the tip of Addison's tongue. Izzie's fingers in her hair, tugging in a way that is almost too painful for her to handle, lets Addison know she's about to come. Addison lips move faster, a little harder, almost as desperate to make the blonde reach her orgasm as Izzie is to feel it.
All Izzie sees is darkness. Her eyes squeeze so tightly she's sure it's unsafe. She just keeps rocking into Addison's mouth, her legs barely keeping her up. And then she feels it. Teeth lightly scrape her clit and she jerks into the touch, her right hand yanking on Addison's head and her left on her own breast, pinching her nipple. Behind her eyelids, in the darkness, spots of colors begin to appear; and in her belly, tight and wound up, she feels her muscles readying.
"Yes, oh, yes," she chants, heavily doing something that can only be considered an excuse for breathing.
Within seconds Izzie's nothing more than a panting mess that's clinging on to Addison as she comes, hard. Addison is more than happy to help her ride wave after wave of pleasure, giving the blonde all she can take before smirking smugly and then licking her lips, tasting Izzie on her them.
...
Later, after the cookies have been baked, the lights turned off everywhere except on the tree, Izzie and Addison sit down on the floor. The house smells like Christmas, and they can barely contain the sheer happiness that is bubbling inside of them. All the thoughts of what tomorrow has to offer is on both of their minds. With it only being the end of Christmas Eve, there's so much more to come. Yet, they both realize, it's already perfect. Everything's perfect. Christmas music, sugar cookies that are shaped like Santa Claus, a wonderfully decorated tree, and a person with them that shares their love for the holiday - what more can they possibly ask for?
Izzie moves over a little so she can rest her head on Addison's lap, facing Addison's stomach. Addison welcomes her, her hand instantly starting to rake through Izzie's blonde hair. Izzie hums pleasantly and wraps her arm around Addison's midsection, slipping her hand under the cotton shirt to gently rub circles against Addison's back.
Izzie's always thought Addison had magical fingers, but when those fingers are running through her hair and her nails are lightly scratching her scalp, magical isn't a good enough word to describe them. Izzie lets out a combination of a yawn and purr, burying her face in the warm material of Addison's clothing, feeling herself getting sleepier with each passing second. Her own hand on Addison's back gradually stops, until it's no longer moving.
Addison smiles as she brushes the hair away from Izzie's face. "Are you still going to tell me you aren't tired?" Addison asks with amusement thick in her whisper.
Izzie scrunches up her face and smiles. "I'm just..." Izzie yawns, bringing her hand to cover her mouth.
Addison laughs and sits Izzie up. "You're just falling asleep. Let's go upstairs."
It takes a minute for Izzie's brain to register the words, and then suddenly she's wide awake and on her feet before Addison's even up. "Okay, let's go," she says eagerly, a bright smile lighting up brighter than the multi-colored lights decorating the tree.
Addison arches her eyebrow, like Addison always does, but Izzie doesn't say anything else. She helps Addison up and then they go upstairs. At the door, Izzie stops Addison and tells her to give her one minute. Izzie slips into the room and then comes back out, less than a minute passing.
"Close your eyes," Izzie says, childlike glee taking over her features. Addison hesitates. "C'mon, just do it."
Addison feels her stomach flip-flop as she closes her eyes, letting Izzie take her hand. "Don't walk me into anything," she says seriously.
"Don't you trust me?" Izzie asks with a laugh. Addison doesn't say anything, but Izzie knows she does.
Addison keeps her eyes closed as they walk into the room. She's guided to the bed, and then Izzie gently pushes her down, letting her sit down on the edge. She puts her hands down on the edge of the bed and squeezes firmly, realizing she's a bit anxious to find out what's going on.
Beside her she feels the bed dip, and then a soft kiss is placed beside her ear, making her breath catch at the unexpected touch. "Open your eyes," Izzie says into her ear, happily.
Izzie watches her girlfriend's eyes open, taking in the surprised expression Addison gets on her face as she looks around the room. Izzie's heart thuds, one thing on her mind: God, she's beautiful. You'd have to be blind not to know Addison's an attractive woman, but this - watching her at this very moment, Izzie can't even describe how gorgeous she is.
Around the room, Izzie's hung Christmas lights. Flickering colorful lights outline the room, the doors, and the bed. The reds and greens illuminated the otherwise dark room, making it just as beautiful as the living room. Realizing she hasn't said anything, she says the first thing that she can think of. "Wow!"
Izzie laughs and falls down on the bed, getting under the cover, suddenly feeling the rush of exhaustion hit her again. "You like?" she asks in a teasing tone.
Addison looks over her shoulder to the tired blonde watching her expectantly. If anyone had asked Addison months ago if she'd ever be this happy about Christmas again, she would have probably said she wouldn't. But Izzie's made everything better than she expected it to be.
Addison crawls into the bed and under the cover. "I love it," she finally responds, her leg sliding between Izzie's.
Izzie clears her throat and lifts her eyes to the ceiling. "I'm pretty sure that mistletoe up there means you're supposed to be kissing me right now."
Addison laughs and caresses the side of Izzie's face, letting her thumb roll over the curve of the other woman's lip. "That was your plan all along, wasn't it? You just wanted to get me in bed so you could-" Addison's words are interrupted by a surprised moan.
Izzie grins against Addison's mouth, her hands cradling her face with both of her hands. "You talk too much," she says against Addison's mouth, kissing her.
Addison rolls over and onto her back when their kiss ends. She takes in a much needed breath of air as she feels Izzie cuddle up to the side of her body. Addison wraps an arm around her. "Merry Christmas," she whispers.
"Merry Christmas."
The End.
Thanks for reading.