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Only one month had passed since the death of Harry 's parents and he still could feel them inside the house, things like soft whispering or the smell of sunflowers in the morning were driving him absolutely crazy. Everything seemed like a frozen memory as if they had never left their house the day of the accident, the piano was still covered with scores that belonged to James, Lily´s hats hanged proudly in the living room and most infuriating of it all the ashes…the bloody ashes of his mom and dad were contained in a little brown box, a little brown box that laid comfortable in the kitchen´s counter. Those weeks where the worst weeks of his life for sure, he spent the days crying till dawn and sleeping throughout the afternoon covered in layers and layers of blankets, nothing made sense anymore night became day and day became night. Remus and Sirius cooked for him every week but nothing seemed to cheer him up not even his acceptance in Julliard or the fact that his best friend was finally beating cancer… everything seemed so unfair, he felt so responsible for the outcome of events that life now was like a huge treasure he didn´t deserve. So that's how Harry learned the real meaning of the word never because for him it was a synonym of emptiness. "I will never be whole again" "I´ve never felt this shattered before" "I could never forgive myself" phrases like this were rooting in his subconscious polluting every hope he was left with compromising the healing power that time possess.

The thing about mourning is that you always end up thinking that you are the only one hurt or devastated, you lose the ability to perceive other people´s pain. Sirius knew this perfectly well and that´s why he decided to give Harry a surprise, a surprise that could help him regenerate and start everything from scratch. That´s why he called Hermione since the girl was a mastermind in planning and Sirius was a disaster in that department, he could easily end up with a mess if he dared to do it by himself. So they decided to make it work, Sirius booked the plane tickets and the train tickets, he bought clothes for his godson and the guide books he needed and Hermione picked the hotels, the cities, the museums, the tours ,the parks and zoos, the suitcases and most important of all the diary they wanted Harry to carry around. They wished for him to make new memories and friends, to finally open the next beautiful chapter in his life and live with the enthusiasm he once had. "Everything will start on Harry´s birthday" Hermione pointed while they were having a conference in Skype "This will be my last gift for him Sirius" she smiled sadly at Sirius blurry face knowing perfectly well that he knew what she was implying

"How can you say that? Your mother told me everything was starting to look good, after your operation and all that stuff" he paused and sighed deeply after a while he gathered to courage to ask her "Hermione…was she laying to me?"

"Sirius…Can I tell you something? I hope you can keep it as a secret" she smiled gently at the older man while she adjusted the pillows behind her "My mom doesn´t know" she looked at her laptop´s keyboard intently expecting the outburst of his friend´s godfather

"Doesn´t know what?" he was afraid of the answer, he had seen her struggle for two entire years now and above all he had seen her become a gorgeous girl that he loved as a father could.

"She doesn't know how tired I am, I don´t want any more medications or hospital beds. I don´t know if I am prepared to hear more news about my condition, I don´t want people´s pity or their encouraging words that in the end are all empty, I just feel it deep inside Sirius maybe I won´t make it and maybe that knowledge scares me to death…but even though I feel this way I want Harry´s happiness, I want him to find love adventure passion and everything in between besides he´s my best friend and I love him dearly. If he´s okay then I will be okay" Sirius could tell from her red nose that she had been crying but he decided not to mention it instead he nodded curtly and said as soft as he could

"July 31st is in five days, I will pick you up at nine so we can tell Harry together" he was going to hang up when Hermione did something he wasn´t expecting

"Thank you Sirius for letting me help you and for the wonderful books you have been sending me this past two years" Of course the elder man couldn´t tell how she found out but then he remembered that this girl was really smart

"You are welcome. Have a good night" He looked into her bright eyes till the screen went black again.

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