The Fourth Doctor
(This story takes place between the classic "Doctor Who" episodes of "The Deadly Assassin" and "The Face of Evil" in Season 14.)
Rose appeared in the console room after a very smooth jump. {We are getting good at this. Thank you, Girl!} she sent to the TARDIS and received a gentle hum in reply. She patted the same familiar console that her early Doctors seem to prefer and looked around. She was alone, and the room was silent and dark. The ship was still humming to her quietly, so she wasn't overly worried, but she did wonder what was going on. {Where is he?} she asked the ship. She was sent an image of the library, with a flash of gentle concern about him. {Thanks, Girl, you know that I'll take care of him!} She gave the console another pat and walked down the corridor, shedding her leather jacket as she went. It was warm in here, she thought, which meant he wasn't trying to maintain the environmental controls. Normally, he liked it cooler. She again wondered what was wrong, as she reached the library and looked in. He was asleep, sprawled out in his chair. Her first impression was of very big hair, gangly limbs, and a nose reminiscent of her leather clad Doctor. She smiled at the sight and quietly asked, "Doctor?" There was no response, so she tried again another way. {Doctor?} Still nothing. She thought that he must be really exhausted if he wasn't aware of someone else's physical and mental presence in the same room with him. She decided that would let him rest and come back to check on him later. She made her way to her room to drop off her jacket and wristcomp and then went to make some tea. She noticed that the TARDIS had moved her current room back to its usual position near the library (her future room was located on a different corridor entirely) and wondered idly if she had a storage area for unused rooms like she did for mugs. She noticed that her room was even nicer this time around, with soothing spa-like colors and soft edges, and she decided that she liked it even better than her old room with its bright cheerfulness. She thought that it would probably make her feel old to see her previous room again, since she was a completely different person than she was back then, but wished that she had a few things like her old photographs here and a few of the mementos that she had picked up in their travels together. She smiled wistfully and left for the galley.
She made them both tea, but found that he was still asleep when she went to deliver his. She left the mug next to his chair in case he woke up soon, and decided that she would go take a nap herself. She was wearier from all of the jumping and stress from trying to save the multiverse – and from trying to keep her secrets safe from the one man who could find them out if he really wanted to - than she would admit – either to the Doctor or to herself. As she entered her room again, she gave a small cry of delight at the familiar photo album that she found on her bed. {Thank you, thank you, thank you!} She cried to the ship as she sat down and flipped it open. She smiled as she looked through all of the familiar photos of people that she had loved, but not seen for years, and felt a release of some of the tension that she had been holding. As her heart grew lighter, her eyes got heavier and she was soon fast asleep.
The Doctor awoke with a start. He could feel that he had slept longer than usual, but still didn't feel completely rested. That wasn't too unusual after the stress of the last few days, he rationalized blearily. Maybe some tea would help, he thought, and his eyes fell upon the full mug next to him. When had he made that? He wondered. He picked up the cup and noticed that the liquid inside was still warm. He could not have made it then because he had been asleep too long, and he could tell that the TARDIS had not done it, either. Therefore, someone else must be on his ship! That was impossible, though, since he had not had company since dropping off Sarah Jane before all of that distasteful business recently on Gallifrey. He sent out a quiet inquiry to his ship, but felt nothing but quiet reassurance from her. The situation was not dangerous, then. He guessed that he would just have to go find out for himself what was going on. As he left the library and headed towards the console room, he noticed the door to an unfamiliar room that was not normally located there. He quietly opened it up and saw that it was a bedroom. He thought that was odd because he knew that most of the bedrooms were on another corridor. He quickly noticed the young blond woman asleep on the bed with an open photo album next to her. He reached out a hand to shake her awake and demand to know what she was doing on his ship, but decided to grab the photo album instead. It wasn't one that he recognized. He turned to the front page and saw that the first picture was of the girl on the bed and an older leather clad fellow with short hair, big ears, and an even bigger smile. The second picture was of the same girl, but with a younger man in a pinstriped suit with a smile that was almost as wild as his hair. Both of the men looked familiar, but what really caught his attention was that the TARDIS was in the background of both pictures. That made him look sharply back at the person on the bed again. Who was she? He noticed that she was quite pretty with a lean muscular figure and clothing common to the 21st century. As he looked even closer at her face, he felt his memories unlock, and a genuine smile bloomed across his tired face. "Rose," he whispered almost reverently.
He looked down at the precious young woman who kept popping up through his lives and taking another piece of his hearts each time she left again (he admitted silently to himself). It was always years between her visits, but each time if felt as if they had just parted. He wondered when she had arrived this time, and concluded that it must have been while he was asleep in the library. She must have made that tea, he realized without surprise. She was always trying to take care of him and he was so grateful for it. She really was quite special, he thought, as he reached down to stroke her cheek. At his touch, she murmured softly, reached up for his hand, and slowly opened her eyes. {Hello, my Doctor!} she thought affectionately. {Hello, my Rose!} he answered back, returning the sentiment. She laughed softly, sat up, and reached up to kiss his cheek.
"Now tell me," she demanded as she gently pulled him down on the bed next to her – taking both of his hands in hers. "What has happened? I can tell something is wrong."
"Oh, Rose," he sighed. He removed one of his hands and ran it through his riotous curls nervously, before returning it back to the shelter of hers. "It's been a disaster." He didn't want to burden her with it, but he knew that she wouldn't leave it alone. Therefore, he proceeded to tell her about having to leave Sarah Jane on Earth, the murder accusation and trial on Gallifrey, and the battle with the Master. Even though she started slightly at the mention of Sarah Jane, she maintained eye contact with him throughout his explanation, and gently stroked the back of his hands with her thumbs.
"So you are alone, then?" she asked when he had finished. He nodded. "You're rubbish on your own," she replied with a small smile. He didn't disagree. "When was the last time you ate something?" she asked. He just shrugged. "I can tell that I am going to have my work cut out for me!" she exclaimed cheerfully. "We are both exhausted and I think that we could use a break. Why don't you march into that console room and enter the coordinates for somewhere relaxing where you and I could have a bit of a holiday? Someone very smart once told me that this ship would always get me to where and when I needed to be, so I don't think we should feel guilty if we forget about the multiverse for just a little while, and focus on ourselves for once. Plus the scan normally takes all day to run, anyways!"
"I love how you think, Rose Tyler!" he exclaimed, gave her a quick squeeze, and then left the room in order to follow her directions!
She joined him just a few minutes later, and marveled about how much better he looked already. He had taken a moment to try and tame his hair, and was jumping around the console, flipping switches, and munching happily on what appeared to be…
"There you are, Rose!" he exclaimed. "Would you care for a jelly baby?"
She laughed and shook her head at him in disbelief. "Where are we going, you daft alien?" she asked fondly.
"You want relaxing?" he asked and she nodded emphatically. "I know just the place then - the secluded island paradise of Aurelia on the planet of Candensia. It is very similar to Fiji on Earth, but with deep purple oceans instead of the blue ones that you are used to. What do you think?"
"That sounds fantastic, Doctor, but please try not to land us in the middle of a revolution or anything," she said cheekily as she went to find some beachwear. When she reached her room, she asked the TARDIS for something that the Doctor would like. She smiled at what was revealed when the wardrobe door opened.
Meanwhile, the Doctor decided to run a diagnostic scan on the TARDIS while he was waiting. He knew that he had been neglecting the Old Girl lately and wanted to make sure that she was okay now that he was feeling better himself. "Thanks to Rose," he thought as he grinned and patted the console affectionately. He turned around a short while later when he heard her return and his breath hitched involuntarily as she approached. She was wearing a simple, but elegant white sundress with matching sandals and her hair was up with little escaping tendrils. She looked like a goddess and he had a moment of doubt about this being a good idea – until she smiled. She twirled for him and asked how she looked. {Lovely} he replied, a bit confused by the inappropriate rush of emotion, and turned away quickly so that she would not see the want that he knew would be in his eyes. He took a moment to compose himself before walking over to the hat stand to reach for his scarf. {Oh no, you don't!} she thought emphatically as she intercepted him. {That monstrosity does not belong on a beach!} He couldn't even feel offended when she laughed, took his hand, and led him out of the door.
It turned out to be a wonderful trip. Surprisingly, there had been no revolutions, evil robots, man-eating plants, or anything else more hostile than the occasional seagull-like bird looking at them suspiciously when they laughed. They were lucky enough to have materialized in a secluded cove and had the place to themselves. It was just the two of them on the gorgeous beach. The Doctor went back into the TARDIS and returned in just a few minutes carrying a couple of lounge chairs and a picnic basket. Most surprising of all, he was wearing shorts! Rose stared at him in amazement for a moment because she had never seen the Doctor in shorts before! She allowed herself to notice his long lean runner's legs and bare feet. Rose shook her head in disbelief and distracted herself by removing her sandals to leave them in her chair. Then they walked down the sand, hand in hand, for a while just enjoying the warm breeze before deciding to go for a swim. Then, to her complete surprise, the Doctor also removed his shirt. He was a bit pale, but she thought he looked quite fit, and she couldn't help but run her eyes over the smattering of hair across his chest. It was then his turn to stare in amazement, as she removed her sundress to reveal an amber-colored two piece suit that matched her eyes perfectly. It was quite modest, but still showed much more of her creamy skin than he had ever seen before. He gulped and hurried down to the water. She ran past him, laughing, and as he admired the view from the back, he thought that he might not survive the day. It was even worse in the water, though! The Doctor's eyebrows shot up into his hairline and he grinned like a lunatic when he accidently heard Rose thinking about how attractive he was with his wet hair slicked back off of his forehead. He then had to slam his shields up, so she couldn't hear what he was thinking, after she rose up dripping wet and gasping after spending too much time holding her breath underneath the water. It all became too much for him, though, when she threw herself soaking wet and laughing into his arms for a hug. He had to make up an excuse to head back to the relative safety of his chair on the beach after that. Time Lords were not used to so much personal physical interaction and stimuli and he just didn't know how to react to it all. He was pleased to note, though, that she seemed to be a bit disappointed when he left and he continued to watch her cavorting in the water until she emerged back on the sand, dripping again. He then felt both relieved and disappointed when she wrapped herself in a towel and broke into his rather questionable thoughts by claiming that she was starving to death!
They shared a pleasant picnic lunch and he asked her what she wanted to do next.
"Well, we are still on holiday," she said grinning, "and since you brought me to this lovely tropical beach first, I think we should visit somewhere cold next where you can wear that Frankenstein of a scarf!"
He laughingly agreed and they packed up to go get ready for their next adventure. After a shower, (where, thinking about her earlier opinion on the subject, he tried a little more seriously to tame his wild hair) and a change into warmer clothing, they were on their way!
"Welcome to the planet of Winter, Rose," the Doctor said with a flourish as he led her by the hand out of the door into the wonderfully empty snowy wonderland in front of them. He picked up the end of his extremely long scarf and flipped it over his shoulder. Rose giggled and imitated his action with the smaller matching scarf that the TARDIS had provided for her. She then ran a few yards away from him and proceeded to provoke an epic snowball fight. After a while, they collapsed into an exhausted heap on the ground. Rose smiled at him, gave him a hand off of the ground, and a kiss on the cheek - before shoving a handful of snow down the back of his pants! After laughing hysterically at his yelp of surprise, she threw herself on the ground and proceeded to make a snow angel. The Doctor felt the need to put up his shields again while watching her wriggling around on the ground spread out like that. Thank goodness that she was fully dressed this time! He looked away, gulping forcefully, and then offered her a hand in order to help her up - before shoving a handful of snow down the front of her shirt! {After all, there's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.} He threw the thought back to her as he ran away from her wrath – both of them laughing like hyenas. She caught up with him just as he reached the Tardis. Instead of exacting terrible revenge, however, she gave him a quick kiss on the lips instead, and left him standing there stunned while she giggled and headed inside to make some cocoa.
He stepped inside the console room and watched her head for the galley, still giggling to herself. He shook his head to clear it. What was he going to do about that girl? The girl that could lighten the dark gloom that he had been living under lately – and all in one day. The least he could do was to help set her mind at ease about her mission, so he went to check the star scan and shouted "Bollocks!" when he realized that he had never set it to begin with!
"What's the matter?" Rose asked, coming into the console room with two steaming mugs of cocoa.
"Oh, Rose, I am so sorry, but I forgot to set the star scan earlier. I ran a diagnostic on the TARDIS instead because I was worried about neglecting her and then totally forgot about the star anomaly scan!" He sounded disgusted with himself.
"Is the TARDIS alright?" Rose sounded concerned. The Doctor nodded. "Good, just set the scan now, then. One more day shouldn't matter that much. We were on holiday, anyways." She flashed a quick smile at him again and he felt better. "Plus, it's not like you did it on purpose!" She waited for him to finish setting the scan and then handed over his cocoa.
While he sipped it, he thought about what she had just said. He had genuinely forgotten to set the scan – probably about the time he saw what she was wearing to the beach. He then felt a bit guilty that he put his own selfishness before the multiverse. Well, it was taken care of now. The scan would run through the night and be finished by the time Rose woke up in the morning. His thoughts then drifted back to the day. It had been fantastic and Rose had even kissed him! He looked over at her and watched her leaning against the console. He noted with concern how tired she looked. He looked closer. She was worried, too, she wasn't even drinking her cocoa – just looking at it. For all her brave words about taking a holiday, he knew that having the fate of the multiverse on her shoulders was wearing her down. She was still carrying secrets, too, ones that she had never let the First Him see, ones that weighed her down. He wanted to help her and wondered what he could do – besides just setting a scan to run.
As he looked, she continued to droop, as if the weight of her thoughts were overpowering her body, as well. He sat down his mug, crossed over to her, wrapped his arms around her, and rested his chin on her head. She put her arms around him, rested her head on his chest, and they just stood there like that without speaking or moving for a few minutes.
"Oh, Doctor!" she said, still not moving, "I'm sorry. I don't know where all of the doom and gloom suddenly came from. We were having such a nice day, and then I guess that I just started thinking too much. It's so much better being here with you, but talking about the star scan reminded me that all of the danger and fear is still there underneath, and I can't help but worry…"
"You don't have to explain anything to me, Rose. I know exactly what you mean." He hugged her tighter. "You know that I will always be here for you!"
"Oh, I hope so… ,"she said so faintly with her face pressed against her chest that he almost didn't hear her…almost… Then he wondered if that was one of the things that she was worried about. Could she possibly think that Future Him wouldn't want her back? With the way that he felt about her now, he couldn't possibly imagine that would ever be the case! For her to go through all of this and be uncertain of the outcome must be hard enough, but not to know how he would feel… Well, he would do everything he could do now to show her that… well… she didn't need to worry about things like that.
"You need rest and food – in that order. Why don't you go relax in a hot bath and put on those cute PJs that you always wear and I will go pick us up some food. Anything to eat, anywhere in time or space – what would you like?
He looked down to see her grinning up at him. "What?" he asked confused.
"You think my pajamas are cute!" She said in a singsong voice and gave him one of those tongue touched grins. Good! That meant she was feeling better, he thought. Then she took off down the corridor to take his advice and get into a bath before he realized that she never answered his question.
{Rose,} he thought after her. {What did you want to eat?}
{Whatever you decide, Doctor, I trust you!} He smiled as he remembered her saying the same thing to First Him, and he set out to prove her right!
Rose sunk down into the deep tub that the thoughtful TARDIS had added to her bathroom. (There had only been a shower in there earlier.) It felt wonderful and it was exactly what she needed after her… well, whatever it was that had happened to her in the console room. As she soaked in the tub, she thought about it. She wasn't one to give in to self-pity, but it had just come out of nowhere and had hit her right in the heart. She knew that the Doctor would help her save the multiverse, but what then? She wondered, not for the first time, if she should let the Doctor know about her secret – that due to Bad Wolf's interference, she didn't age, that she could heal herself, and that her promised "forever" could possibly be a more accurate description now. However, now what she was most afraid of was that the Doctor would then see a life with her as an obligation – something that he should do - rather than what he actually wanted to do. She knew that the Doctor cared for her, but did he care for her enough, could he really care for her forever? She had been fully prepared to spend her forever alone on another planet somewhere, before the Doctor had come back into her life. But now…could she do that knowing that she and the Doctor were in the same universe again? Would she have a choice? Just then the current Doctor's thoughts interrupted hers: {Rose, dinner is here!}
She felt a moment of panic. Had he heard her? Although, she always tried to maintain some shielding, she had not purposely put up all of her mental shields because she had been completely alone. She listened intently, but could not hear any of his thoughts. He must be shielded then. That was good. He didn't hear her, then. Her secret was still safe. Without prior knowledge, he still had free will when it came to any decisions about her. That was the way that it needed to stay! She sighed with relief and sent back a thought to him: {Coming…Be there in a minute!} She couldn't resist also sending a wave of affection with it. No matter what happened with him in the future, she was so fond of that alien. More than fond really… but enough about that. She rose out of the tub, dried off, and went to find those PJs that the Doctor had requested.
Little did she know that the Doctor was sitting in the galley in a state of quiet shock. Rose's shields must have completely dropped when she had relaxed in the tub because he had heard every single thought from the moment he had reentered the ship! He had suspected that she was keeping a secret and that she had doubts about Future Him, but he certainly had not expected this! The problem with getting attached to humans had always been how ephemeral and fleeting that their lives were. The heartbreak was guaranteed before anything ever began, but now… Forever with Rose Tyler…that was an intriguing thought - one that thrilled him with possibilities! Why didn't she think that Future Him would feel the same way? However, he would have to think about that later because he could hear her padding down the corridor now. If she didn't want him to know about it, then he would pretend that he didn't – for now! He couldn't stop the manic smile from spreading across his face, however, when she appeared in the galley in the requested PJs. He also couldn't help the giving her a hug and a kiss on the forehead, either.
She couldn't help grinning when she saw the table absolutely covered with food. "What's all of this?" she asked amused as she gestured to it. She thought that was what he was so cheerful about, as well.
"Well, I wanted to make sure that you had something that you liked, so I picked up a little bit of everything that I could think of!" he said, still grinning happily.
"You're not going to have to cook for a week!" she said, kissing him on the cheek before grabbing a couple of plates out of the cupboard. They sat down to eat. Rose tried to take a little of everything and had the Doctor explain all of the unfamiliar items to her. He was very enthusiastic and kept getting her to try this dish or that one. He was even brave enough to feed her a few bites. She returned the favor and they both ended up laughing hysterically when they got a little too enthusiastic and ended up making a mess!
"You are in such a good mood," Rose said wonderingly as she helped him to wipe off some sauce that was on his cheek.
"That's because it has been such a good day," he replied as he wiped some sauce off her chin.
"It has!" She agreed. "I'm glad we took this holiday! I love having adventures with you, but sometimes it is nice just to sit back and spend time together."
"Yes, it is." He agreed and they smiled at each other over the table.
Then they cleaned up as much as possible and took their cups of tea with them to the library.
They settled in their usual spaces with the Doctor in his chair and Rose on the sofa. They each took a book that they pretended to read but, really their thoughts were focused on each other. The Doctor was still feeling ecstatic from his discovery of Rose's secret and he couldn't help sneaking peeks at her. She, however, found herself thinking about the last Doctor that she had shared this space with, and she just had to ask. "Doctor, I have been wanting to know. Would you mind telling me what happened to cause your last regeneration?
He looked over at her and debated, remembering how she had cried over him the last two times. He hated to make her sad, but was always gratified to know that she cared. Therefore, he told her, "Radiation poisoning from a web of Metebelis crystals."
"Blimey! Radiation poisoning? That doesn't sound pleasant, at all – and you have the nerve to call me jeopardy friendly!" she said with tears in her eyes. She patted the seat next to her in an invitation that he couldn't resist. He crossed over to the sofa to gather her up in his arms. They just held each other for a minute and then Rose leaned back to look at him. She had something else that she wanted to tell him...something she had to get off of her chest. "I don't know if I should tell you this, but I've met Sarah Jane, you know."
"What? When?" asked the Doctor, taken by surprise.
"We solved a mystery together along with Future You and a friend of mine. I liked her! However, you definitely owe her an apology!"
"For…"
"Abandoning her!" Rose choked out and tears suddenly sprang to her eyes again – for a completely different reason this time.
"Oh, Rose!" exclaimed the Doctor and tightened his hug around her. If she knew about that, then no wonder she had doubts about his intentions towards her! Maybe he could explain, though, "I couldn't…"
"You don't need to explain anything to me, Doctor." Rose said with feeling. "Future You already did. I understand why you did it, but I don't agree with it! Causing a present loss to prevent a future loss just doesn't make a lot of sense when you think about it rationally – not when you could make the most of the time that you have." With that thought provoking statement, she closed her eyes, and leaned against his strong chest for a few minutes. She felt herself starting to drift. Right before she fell asleep, though, she had a thought and shook herself awake enough to ask, "The star scan?"
"It's not finished, yet. The TARDIS will let us know when. Why don't you go on to bed and then we will handle it in the morning?"
"Yeah," she said softly. "I'll do that." She gave him the usual kiss on the cheek, squeezed his hand, and then left for her room.
He then realized that she probably would have fallen asleep in his arms if he had not said anything. He felt a moment of regret before he realized that that there was every possibility now that they had a long life ahead of them in which to do that…and a lot more! He blushed a little and left to go to the console room.
Soon afterwards, a steady beep indicated that the star scan was finished. Of course, it showed up negative for anomalies. He wouldn't be the one to help Rose either, then. He leaned on the console, double checking the scan, and thinking about what else he could do. There had to be a more proactive solution somewhere! He continued to think about it…and Rose… for the rest of the night.
Rose awoke and heard a few of the Doctor's thoughts and could tell instantly that the star scan had not been useful this time either. Therefore, she got out of bed and reluctantly put on her "jumping" clothes. Their holiday was over and it was time to move on. Being with this Doctor had been nice, though. They had experienced a closeness that she had not felt in a while. She smiled at the thought that she had almost fallen asleep in his arms last night, and she sighed in disappointment…maybe next time. Then she went into the galley to prepare them both some breakfast. She searched through last night's leftovers until she found something suitable and then she felt his presence behind her. She turned around and stepped right into his arms. They held each other for a moment and he whispered in her hair, "Rose, I'm so sorry, but…" {It's okay, Doctor, I know. I heard you earlier when I woke up.} There was no more to be said, so she kissed his cheek and finished making breakfast. They mostly ate their breakfast in companionable silence before making their way, hand-in-hand, to the console room.
Well, there was nothing else for it. It was time for her to leave and jump to the next Doctor.
"Promise me something!" she whispered, holding him tightly.
"Anything, my dear!"
"Find someone to travel with. You're no good on your own!"
"I'd rather travel with you." He said openly and honestly – for once.
"You will…eventually," she said a little hesitantly. Then she smiled that special smile, "and it will be fantastic! Until then…" She pressed a firm kiss against his lips and then she was gone.