Disclaimer: i don't own the whole stargate world, shame, i would take such good care of it...
A/N: i will update this eventually, i just have a sore wrist at the moment and what with lots of work and that, i have pretty much no free time.
Daniel could feel the heat of the hand device still residing on his forehead. He was alone. He had lost his team. He had failed them. He could still see them screaming at him for help as lost consciousness, no one could have survived what had happened to them, and then the next thing he knew he had woken up here, in this cold damp cell. He shivered as the memories of the previous day assailed him and prevented him from resting. Every little noise he heard scared him half to death, without his team he was nothing. Images of their smiling faces haunted him. They were dead and it was his fault, he could feel warm tears flow freely down his face streaking the dirt that had accumulated there. 'I'm sorry' he sobbed the words half choking in his throat. He wrapped his arms around his raised knees and rocked back and forth, his head bent forward.
He suddenly returned his attention o the reality that he was in when he heard footsteps coming down the corridor, the First Prime had returned. The door to his cell opened and he flinched as the light that shone in blinded him. He didn't fight as the Jaffa who followed the first prime lifted him to his feet and dragged him. 'You deserve this' a voice muttered in his head, 'you let them die, ITS ALL YOUR FAULT!' 'No I didn't... I couldn't help them, I...' cried Daniel aloud, thought the Jaffa took no notice, 'failed them' the voice laughed.
The days went past in a blur. He was taken to the 'snake' at least once a day, sometimes more, depending on whether it need entertainment, in the form of him writhing in pain. It had always wanted answers, though answers to what Daniel did not know, those answers had left him long ago and were a long lost memory that had been swept away in his pain and guilt. It had screamed at him for information about a code, for locations about a race called the tok'ra. Daniel could only laugh, he had no answers to give and somehow it pleased him to see it get angry at this. He felt hollow inside, his cell had become his home, since his team had died he had no-one. The team had been his family, the only people who had cared about him, 'like I deserved their friendship, look how I repaid it' he said quietly to himself. He had been talking to himself for so long now that he couldn't remember when it had become such a need, granted in his past life he would have muttered to himself, but know he held full blown conversations, the voice that yelled in his head was too much to take and thinking into himself had made him feel claustrophobic and more trapped than he currently was.
The days were long and dark, the food was practically nonexistent and he laughed despite the pain it cause his dry throat as he glanced down at his shirt that now hung off him, the outline of his ribs clearly visible through the rips in the material. He could fell it in his heart, acceptance that this was his punishment for their deaths, he relished the pain that it inflicted on him, it made him feel alive and prevented him from forgetting why he was there.
As the footsteps down the corridor grew louder, Daniel braced himself, he knew what to expect by now, it was the same old routine, and he longed for new ways in which to feel pain. The door to his cell was burst open, Daniel actually looked up to see what was happening, hoping that at last the old routine would be broken for a new one.
What he saw was Jack standing in the doorway, smiling at him, but an immense hurt badly hidden behind his eyes, 'oh, God Daniel!' he exclaimed on seeing his friend. Daniel had been left behind, and no-one got left behind, but the rescue mission had taken forever to appear, there had been those who had felt the removal of Daniel from the SGC had actually been a benefit and had tried everything within their power to stop the rescue mission. Jack had been driven crazy as had Sam and Teal'c once they had woken up in the infirmary to discover the lack of his Daniel, his Danny, his spacemonkey.
Sam came quickly behind Jack; 'is he here sir?' she looked over and saw Daniel huddled in the corner staring at them his eyes filled with fear. She had to take a step back, a hand automatically flying up to her mouth. Teal'c, who had just arrived on the scene, simply remained silent, watching as the scene unfolded.
Daniels hart thundered in his chest and in his ears, the team, but they were dead and it was his fault, now they were here to remind him. He couldn't take his eyes off them. He was petrified; he quickly fled into the corner of the cell, seeking the all consuming shadows. He needed to get away he didn't want to face the truth, his team was dead and now they were haunting him. He glanced out from his hiding place to check if they were still there, they were still at the door, not moving, he banged his head repeatedly against the head trying to remove the image of them, hoping it would stop his mind from making him see them.
'Danny, no!' shouted Jack as Daniel began to smash his head against the wall. Daniel could feel arms wrapping around him, and he only hit the wall harder, they weren't going to get him, he couldn't face it. Darkness blurred his vision, a warm stick substance was now coating most of his face, and he gave in to the darkness, the last thing he saw was jack looking down at him, a smile spread across his face as he felt safe and away from the invading spectres that had tried to take him, 'you're not going to get me' he muttered to himself as he lost consciousness.
Jack watched as Daniel whacked his head harder against the wall, he fought him, wrapping his arms around him to pull him away from the wall, Daniel just seemed to go limp in his arms, a smile spread across his face as he muttered, ' you're not going to get me' Jacks heart broke. He had been too late, he had failed Daniel. He lifted Daniel and carried him from the room, everyone was quiet, Sam, Teal'c and SG-3 just quietly watched as Jack strode past them, with Daniel in his arms. Everyone followed as Jack marched off into the distance heading towards the Stargate. Sam ran up ahead to dial the gate, Jack however never acknowledged her action, but strode through the now open wormhole back to earth.
Chaos broke out as Jack emerged from the event horizon, everything happened in a blur, Daniel was pried from his arms and whisked off to the infirmary, he was losing him again, he fought the orderlies, ignoring the shouts from General Hammond, hardly noticing as Sam and Teal'c held him back. He just fell into their arms, slowly sinking down towards the ramp, and put his head into his hands.
Daniel awoke, he wasn't in his cell. He nervously glanced around ignoring the pain this caused to his head; he could see his team around him. He was in the infirmary. He brought his knees up to his chest, feeling the coarse material of the infirmary sheets against his legs. Jack was awake now; he had fallen asleep, seeing movement from Daniel he cheerfully cried, 'hello, sleeping beauty!' Daniel flinched. Jacks smile faded and he called for Frasier, 'Doc, he's up!' Daniel just seemed to try to make himself smaller.
Janet quickly pushed back the curtain surrounding Daniels bed, glad to see him awake, 'so how's my favourite patient?' Daniel didn't respond. Instead he just glanced away from her, appearing to be more interested in the sheets that surrounded him. Janet unperturbed, moved forward and put an arm on his shoulder, Daniel just suddenly freaked and retreated further up the bed. Janet bit her lip thoughtfully. She turned around to the team, 'you're going to have to go' the shouts of protest were silenced as she raised her hand, 'I'm not leaving' shouted jack, using the silence make his point heard, 'he needs to be around us, we're familiar to him, he needs that' Janet relented, 'fine you can stay, the rest of you will have to go though' Sam and Teal'c left, both making their farewells to Daniel, with Sam promising Chocolate Walnut Cookies on her return.
Jack watched as Janet tried to do an examination and Daniel simply tried to get away, he wasn't being violent, just trying to avoid anyone's gaze and touch. Jack stood quickly as Daniel avoided Janet for the fifth time, he was over to Daniel in a second, he grabbed his head and stared straight at Daniel, 'you're safe here, whatever is going on in your head, its... we rescued you, we tried to get there sooner, I'm sorry it took so long, but... look I'm sorry, just get back to me' Daniel was looking a Jack petrified, he couldn't remove his blue eyes from Jacks. Jack stepped back, shaking Daniel however simply looked up at him and said, 'I'm sorry'
'No, Danny there's nothing to be sorry for, this is not your fault, what they did, you're not responsible' replied Jack, happy that Daniel had responded.
'I-I got you killed, you're not real, leave me alone!' shouted Daniel. He quickly glanced down and rested his head on the top of his knees.
Jack and Janet simply stood shell shocked at this revelation. Jack suddenly understood what had happened in the cell. Is heart seems to be being squeezed. He waved off Janet. Janet understood his need to be alone with Daniel. He took a seat next to him and placed his hand on Daniels shoulder but removed it quickly as if he had been burnt as Daniel flinched.
'Danny, I'm not dead, we were ambushed, they captured you, we were all seriously injured in the fight, I tried to get to you, but I-I couldn't, there were just to many, we had to retreat, Carter was in a serious condition, I had to get her back' Jack hoped that his revelation would allow for Daniel to do the same. Daniel however didn't reply, though he did appear to hear him. Jack felt the fickle flame of hope rise in his heart.
A/N: please review! it will make me update sooner! and remember reviews are love! oh, P.S can you do songfics on this website?