Title: I promise you I'll face myself, next time around.
By: Goth-Punk88 [Kanae
Pairing: NaruSaku.
A/N's: This was written for the Valentine's challenge going on in Heaven and Earth, the NaruSaku forum. The keyword I decided to use is 'Promise'.
English is not my first language, so you're bound to find a few mistakes in here. If you could please point them out in a review, I'll be more than happy to come back and fix them all!
This also came out longer than I intended, and though the first part of it looks like a an analysis of Sakura's feelings, I promise you it'll get better. I did my best to keep Sakura and Naruto IC.
Disclaimer: Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto and Sueshia. No copyright infringement is intended by this.
I promise you I'll face myself, next time around.
- -
She wasn't too sure of exactly where she was going, but her legs seemed to be moving on their own accord and right then, she didn't feel like questioning them.
Lately, she hadn't been in the mood to question anything anymore.
She guessed, that part of it was her own fear of the answers those questions may give her. What was she so scared of, though? That she wasn't sure of.
The only thing she knew was that there was this odd feeling in her chest whenever she saw him lately; something between relief—that he was still there, always unchanging—and a deep grief, a deep sadness that made her heart ache in ways she couldn't really put her finger on.
It was somewhat unnerving—she mused, to get that feeling and not know what was producing it. To have her heart beating a little faster, a little differently, and not being able to put a name to the feeling.
She thinks that's the reason of why she has been trying to avoid him lately. Well, not exactly avoid him, but be less time in his presence seems accurate as a way to describing it. Before, when he came back after he expent those years away training, she remembers always trying to be in his presence for as along as possible. To hear his laugh, sneer at his bad jokes and secretly laugh at his good ones, to simply take him in.
She didn't like to think about this too much, but the truth is she knows she used to be a bitch to him—most of the time. Because hey, she too used to have her good moments with him! She remembers once being even willing to give up her and Sasuke-kun's chances to become a chuunin just for him!.
Though of course, he doesn't know that. He never will. She is not one to boast about the good things she does—or thinks about doing.
But still, deep down, she knows that even if she summed up all the good things and thoughts she had about him back them, they wouldn't be able to counter all the bitchy answers she gave him, the scolds she answered his grins with, the way she so easily disregarded him in order to focus on someone else. Right in his face.
Looking back at it, she was a little bit insensitive.
Okay, scratch that.
She was more than a little bit insensitive. In fact, sometimes she doesn't get why he is the way he is with her—why he seems to love her so much, when she used to be so mean to him. She knows for sure that she'd hold some kind of bitterness if someone had given her that treatment, so sometimes, she thinks that perhaps she isn't entirely deserving of the smiles he always gives her.
But she guesses that was just the way Naruto was. That big and naïve heart of his just couldn't hold back anything against anyone, no matter what it was.
Unless it was Orochimaru or something related to Sasuke-kun, of course.
A soft smile makes its way across her lips, as she thinks about the sheer resolution that always possesses his eyes whenever he talks about bringing the other boy back, as if his life depended on it. More than once, she has thought that perhaps it does.
The smile starts to vanish, as quickly as it came.
She has tried to tell him, more than once. To talk to him about that, how he's working himself over the limit, how he should take a rest—How Sasuke-kun is safer now, he can take things easier. They don't have a deadline anymore, and Sasuke-kun knows how to take care of himself, he isn't alone either!
And dammit, she's always the one who ends up healing him whenever he does something stupid or pushes himself over his limits! Couldn't he have the barest traces of consideration with her as well?! Jeez.
But she never says anything. Instead observing with sad eyes the way he works and works, never resting. She knows she doesn't have any right to say anything. Not anymore.
She has allowed him to believe, for years, that her need for Sasuke is as great as his. And it's not that she doesn't want or need him back! She does. She'd be lying to herself is she said that she didn't need him back as much as she did back then when she first cried her heart out to Naruto—but she would be also lying to herself if she said that her need for him was greater than Naruto's.
Naruto's was too great. Too intense, too suffocating, too needing. To the point of unhealthy, even.
Sometimes—and she kicked herself for that, she kicked and argued with the horrid part of herself that dared to utter such selfish thoughts—she even felt a little jealous of Sasuke.
…Alright, she felt more than a little jealous. Sue her.
But who could blame her? When she had to stand, to witness at first row day after day how Naruto lived with his eyes set on only him? How he seemed to need him so damn badly? Sasuke's absence was something that had been eating at the pits of Naruto's soul little by little, and through time the blonde had always tried his hardest to keep it all hidden; hidden behind that goofy smile of his, and his carefree attitude that didn't quite suite him anymore. But she noticed.
Sakura noticed.
She noticed because she has been there through the beginning of it all, and because she still remembers the state Naruto was in when he came back from fighting with Sasuke—she doesn't remember the way he was covered thoroughly with bandages, as much as she remembers the hollowness in his eyes and the tremble on his smile as he promised her that he'd fulfill his promise of a lifetime.
His promise of a lifetime.
She halts, resisting the urge to sigh.
Those words made her shiver whenever she thoughts about them—they made her shiver for very conflicting reasons, too.
One part of her, shivered with shame. Shame that she placed such a burden on Naruto's shoulders, without acknowledging first that the most affected person with Sasuke's leaving would be no one else but Naruto himself.
God, she used to be so selfish. Thank God she wasn't like that anymore or she would have to have punched herself more than once already.
The other part of her, though, shivered with something else entirely different. It shivered with an odd mixture of the feeling she was previously musing about, the one she got whenever she saw him. That warm, fulfilling shadow of something that overwhelmed her and awakened that deep ache inside her heart.
She knew what she was aching for. She has known for a long while now, perhaps even before their eyes met for the first time after almost three years. She has known even before she realized that she didn't quite feel the same way now when she was in Sasuke's presence. Her knees still shook, her heart still beat faster, her breath was still erratic—but it wasn't for the same reasons.
She knew that. She had accepted that. She had accepted that perhaps her love for Sasuke, even though real and overwhelming as it was back then, wasn't mean to last. At least not like that. Her love for him hadn't what was needed to carry on, healthily, forever and ever without him even being there. It didn't have what was needed to evolve and become greater and greater with the pass of time; it didn't have it, and it would never have it, either.
That was something she had come to terms with a long time ago, and even though it was hard for her at first—she refused to let go. Beating normality could be something very scary to do—she was left without another option when she realized that there was simply nothing else to do but to let go. When she realized that she had let go a long time ago, and had been holding on for dear life on the remains of something that just wasn't there anymore.
And so, that's when her need to have Sasuke back became something different all together. She wanted her team back, she wanted to see his scold, she wanted to know he was safe and close. She wanted not to make the same mistakes once again, and this time offer him what she knows he truly needs—a friend. Without nothing else or any other feelings interfering.
But most of all, she simply wanted to have her two boys being happy once again, in each other's company.
It hurt—it did sting, deep down. No that she would admit it—to know without doubts that those two needed each other more than they would ever need her. To know that when those two were together, there was simply no space for her, because they fulfilled each other in ways she couldn't even dream to.
It hurt, of course it did. There was Team Seven, and there were Sasuke and Naruto. That was something she had come to terms with, once she actually gave some thought to the way things were before Sasuke left. But it didn't mean that her heart didn't ache a little bit whenever she was left out and they simply stared at each other, as if nothing else in the world mattered.
Could someone really blame her for being jealous of Sasuke?
No, of course they couldn't. No one on their right mind would. At least, not someone who felt the same way she did about—
"Sakura-chan?"
Oh god dammit. Speaking about the devil.
Said blonde devil was currently staring at her with a curious and somewhat puzzled expression from across the street, his head tilted slightly to the side—which made him look so damn adorable—and there she was again!
Stop it, Sakura, stop it!
"Sakura-chan!"
And now he's running towards her, his puzzled expression being replaced by a bright grin. And she has to hold herself from allowing her fingers to comb her hair a little.
"Hey, Naruto"
Sakura says, as casually as possible. There was no need to let the guy know she had been thinking about him for the last straight ten minutes, right? Of course there wasn't.
And was it her imagination or everyone was giving them odd looks? They better not me thinking about saying anything to Naruto because they'd meet the wrath of her fis—You idiot. You have been standing in the same place for how long already?! And do I need to remind you you're in the middle of a damn street? Of course they're going to stare!
--And his orange outfit doesn't help, either. Though it does look pretty good on him, if I must say so.
Shut up!
"Sakura-chan? Are you alright?" He had his head titled to the side once again, and god if he didn't stop looking so damn adorable she was going to punch him right then and there for being so damn unhelpful!
"Yeah, yeah. I'm alright" She waves one of her hands, trying to take importance out of his words, and gives him a smile. He though, takes a second longer than usual to buy her excuses.
"Are you sure? You seemed kinda lost in thought right there"
"I told you I'm alright, Naruto. Really, don't worry" She stops smiling and instead grins up at him; there's some hesitation in his expression, as if he's wondering weather to believe her or not, so she takes matter into her own hands and grabs him by the arm, pulling him forward along with her. "So, where were you?"
"Ehh I was…" He's obviously somewhat taken aback by her sudden action, still giving her a surprised look that she deliberately ignores as he tries to regain his balance and keep up with her at the same time. "I was changing my clothes! They kinda stung, you know, with all that crap that fell over me and all"
She can't help but to roll her eyes at him, remembering all too well just why it had fallen over him. "Well, perhaps it wouldn't have happened if you weren't so adamant about helping Yomire-san to bring her chores in" Sakura feels him stiffen somewhat, and she lets go of his arm, walking a few steps ahead of him in order to hide her scowl. "Didn't know you were such a gentleman!"
The tone in her voice tells Naruto that it was meant as anything but a compliment, and it makes him cringe as he hurries his pace in order to catch up with her. But being careful enough as to keep his distance, god forbid Sakura-chan tried to punch him or something. He really wanted to make it to the end of the day unscratched, thank you very much. "Of course I'm a gentleman, Sakura-chan! Every fiber of Uzumaki Naruto is full of gentlemaness!"
She resists the urge to smack him over the head. That's not even a word, idiot. "Really? Then how come you don't even offer your help when you see me loaded with books?"
Her words are said as nonchalantly as ever, but the truth was she was more than a little indignant about the matter. For an instant she thinks that Naruto has perhaps caught on it, but whatever hope she has is mercilessly crushed by his next cheerful words.
"But why would I, Sakura-chan! You can carry them all just fine! You're stronger than me, and I'm a man!"
The crashing sound of her fist meeting Naruto's cheek could be heard through the whole street as loudly as the one made by his body crushing into the nearest wall, and Sakura's following scream of rage.
"JUST WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPLY, YOU IDIOT?!"
See? It was for time likes this that she just couldn't understand how she could have fallen in love with a moron like that.
"So, isn't the view just beautiful?"
Sakura says a little too loudly, a little too cheerfully as she stretches her limbs and stares at the city extending right under them.
"Ow… you didn't have to punch me so hard, Sakura-chan" Naruto murmurs by her side, still massaging his swollen cheek. She doesn't turn towards him, but she does look at him from the corner of her eye—alright, perhaps she had exaggerated just a little. But the boy could be such an idiot sometimes! She just lost her patience, that's all!
"Shut up, you deserved it"
"Did not!"
"Of course you did!"
"I didn't! I didn't say anything wrong!"
And leave it to him to not even realize his mistake. Jiraiya-sama always prided himself on being the best with woman, but it seemed that he only taught Naruto his perversion and nothing at all about tact.
She resists the urge to shake her head with deception, and instead contents herself with rolling her eyes. "You're such a moron"
"And you're too mean, Sakura-chan"
And then he's pouting. And she really didn't intend to see him—she had been trying not to, after all she knew what would happen. And of course, as soon as she catches a glimpse of his expression her resolve melts and guilt makes its way in.
Guilt, and that warm feeling that will afterwards become that deep ache she didn't like to feel.
But that ache was her faults entirely. She had no one else to blame but her. And well, destiny, perhaps. No matter how cheesy it sounded.
"Oh come here"
"S-Sakura-chan! What are you doing?"
His blue eyes are widened like plates when she inches closer to him and pulls him towards her, her hand already starting to glow with a mixture of blues and greens.
"What does it look like I'm doing, silly? I'm healing you"
There's the barest traces of nervousness in her tone, though. And if he looked close enough, he would notice them as well as the blush that was currently trying to color her cheeks—but she knows Naruto is not that observant. Not because he can't, or because he doesn't want to—but because he doesn't care. Not right now at least.
He doesn't have eyes or mind for anything else but bringing Sasuke back. She knows.
"I—you don't need to do it, Sakura-chan! The fox's chakra will have it healed in just two minu--"
"And I'm supposed to stand your complaining for that long? You've got to be kidding me"
He blushes, and adverts his eyes. It's not until a few seconds later that he speaks again, and Sakura thanks him for that. That way she has something else to concentrate on other than their proximity. "…You really don't need to, Sakura-chan. You must be tired, you were working at the hospital until now, right?"
"That doesn't matter, I'm not tired"
"…But still. It really didn't hurt that much, I was just exaggerating. You know me" He gives her a grin, and scratches the back of his neck with his hand. "You really shouldn't have bothered with m--"
"—But I wanted to. So deal with it, shut up, and let me do my work. I can't heal your cheek if you talk so much"
She pretends she doesn't notice the way his blush intensifies, or the way he adverts his eyes for a few moments before starting to stare at her from the corner of his eyes, probably hoping she wouldn't notice. She pretends to not notice the way his heart is beating a little faster than normal, or the way his breathe tickles her skin and makes shivers run down her spine.
Pretending is always easier, after all. It means you don't have to acknowledge anything.
"Done!"
Sakura smiles, proudly, and leans back once again—not quite to her previous position, though. She's some inches closer to Naruto now. Said boy takes a few seconds to breathe in deeply and will his blush to subside, before turning towards her.
"Thank you, Sakura-chan! You're really good at this, I can't feel any pain anymore!" And there is his painfully oblivious smile, and Sakura pretends to buy it.
"Of course I'm good! I'm Tsunade-sama's apprentice, after all!"
"I like how you heal me better, though!"
She ignores the way her heart skipped a beat with his simple words, and closes her eyes to give herself an air of indifference. "Baaaka, my shishou is ten times better than me!"
"But she smells like sake! I don't like that smell" There's something odd in his voice and the way he frowns as he says those words, and Sakura can't help but to blink with slight surprise as she turns towards him to study his expression.
"You don't like the smell of sake?" His shake of the head is energetic, but serious, and that has Sakura arching her eyebrows. True, she didn't like the smell of sake either—it was a little too intoxicating for her, even when it wasn't that strong. Some medicaments could smell a lot stronger than that liquor—but there was something quite odd about the way the blonde professed his dislike about the drink.
Something told her that perhaps it wouldn't be a good idea to pry into Naruto's personal matters, but her curiosity had already taken over and her mouth was already moving as that warning made its way towards her mind. "Why don't you like it? I mean… I know it's not the best smell ever but it isn't that bad"
"I just… don't like it"
Alright, that tone of voice made the matter something personal.
"Naruto?" She questioned, the traces of worry she was starting to feel being more than a little apparent on her features.
"It's nothing, Sakura-chan. Really"
Really? Then why wasn't he looking at her in the eyes?
"Naruto…" She pushes instead, and he signals he's giving in with a tired sigh.
"It's just…" The blonde sighs once again, and turns his head slightly more towards one side, hiding most of his expression from Sakura, "you know I wasn't really, well, loved when I was a kid. You also know why"
Her heart gave a little thug inside her chest, as she realized that her early suspicions were in fact right. There was something else behind his hate for Sake, something painful… and she was a little scared of finding out.
It wasn't a secret how Naruto's childhood was. For that reason they didn't mention it, they never talked about it unless it was strictly necessary. Sakura didn't know the details, she wasn't sure if she wanted to… it scared her to find out just how much pain he had to endure back then.
"One day… some guys beat me up. I can't remember the pain, or the sounds, but what I do remember was a strong smell of sake. I was seven"
He turns towards her right then, and gives him a grin that did nothing to hide the fact that those memories in fact pained him. His apparent lack of concern only added to Sakura's horrified expression. "I guess I don't like it because of it; it brings bad memories"
She adverts her eyes, breaking their gaze and instead focusing her green eyes on the ground. She doesn't want Naruto to see the immense amount of guilt she's feeling. The rational part of her knows that there's nothing she could have done, nothing she can feel guilty about, but she still can't help but wonder just where was she when Naruto was suffering that badly?
Right. She was worried about Ino stealing her crush from her, and stepping out from her shadow.
That thought does nothing to alleviate her guilt.
"Naruto, I--"
"—You don't need to apologize, Sakura-chan" He's grinning, more genuinely this time as she turns towards him with surprise. "There's nothing you could have done about it, it isn't your fault. It isn't anyone's fault"
And there he was again, taking off the blame of the shoulders of people who deserved it. But she guessed that was simply the way Naruto was.
Just another thing that made him so different from Sasuke.
They felt differently, they saw things differently; they approached things in a different way, they wore different facades, they chose different paths.
She also guesses that was the reason of why she fell in love with him.
When she takes the sudden bold step of taking his hand into hers, she's smiling softly, apologetically. "I wasn't going to apologize about that. I know I couldn't have done anything back then, though you know I'll gladly punch them for you now"
She's still smiling even when he can't do anything else but stare at her wide-eyed, taken aback by her sudden gesture.
"I was going to apologize about something else…" Her eyes lower to the whiskers in his cheek. She had been postponing this conversation, for a long time now. But it was time to have it, it was time to apologize once and for all for something that had been eating up at her for more than two years, "…I know I wasn't the best friend or teammate to you back when Team Seven first got established, Naruto. I was--"
"Eh? What are you talking about, Sakura-chan?"
Sakura meets his eyes with slight surprise, and finds him giving her a questioning look, seemingly recovered from his shock. He seems to take her meeting his eyes as a compel for him to keep talking, so he does. "You were great!"
Sakura can do nothing but to stare at him, dumbfounded. And he seems to find her expression funny, because he's grinning at her as he keeps talking.
"You were always looking out for me and Sasuke, always worrying about us. You were always cheering me on in my fights, and you went to see me to the hospital when I was hurt! You always tried to keep me in check so I didn't make a fool out of myself, and explained things to me when I didn't understand!"
"And you also gave me your food, when I was tied to that post!"
His eyes seem to be positively shining as he recalls that particular memory, and something inside Sakura seems to be knotting up, something burning right behind her eyes.
She tries with all her might, right then, to believe that she would have given him her food sooner or later with or without Sasuke thinking about it first. She tries with all her might, because she doesn't want to let down his thoughts about her.
"But I.. I wasn't patient with you, Naruto. I always snapped at you and--"
--And Naruto would have nothing of it. He brushes her of with the same easiness and the same bright grin he used the first time, his shoulders heightening up and down with mirth. "And what does that matter? I wouldn't have been patient with myself, either!" Naruto scratches the back of his neck awkwardly with his free hand, a soft hint of a blush starting to color his cheeks. "I was pretty much a brat, huh?"
Sakura tries to protest, but he's talking once again. "But you, you have always been great, Sakura-chan! The best teammate and friend I could ever ask for!"
She wants to say something, anything, but the words just wouldn't come out. And the only thing she can do is stutter without actually emitting a sound, her eyes shinning with unleashed tears that she's hoping with all her might Naruto won't take notice of.
How come he thinks so highly of her? And how come that makes her feel so happy and so bad at the same time?
Her attempts at figuring out what to say are broken by the sudden sounds of lights exploding in the sky, lightening up the Hokage Mountain and them along with it. Naruto turns towards the fireworks, an amazed look on his face.
"I had forgotten they were going to light those off tonight!"
"I had forgotten today was Saint Valentine's"
Naruto chuckles and they fall in an amiable silence, Sakura thankful for the interruption as they both stare at the sky and the beautiful dances of lights of all colors that were blending with the stars.
It's not until the last light has gone off, that Naruto speaks again.
"That reminds me--"
Sakura turns towards him just in time to see him searching for something in his kunai pouch, and she arches one eyebrow, wondering just what he was looking for so adamantly.
"Ah, found it!" Naruto grins, and she tilts her head to one side in order to try and get a glimpse of whatever it was he was hiding behind his back, but he catches her and twists his body to the left, his grin growing wider at seeing her frustrated expression. "Hehe, I lied earlier, Sakura-chan"
Lied? About what?
He seems to understand her unasked question, because once again he's scratching something with his free hand; this time though, it's his cheek. "I didn't only go to my house to get a change of clothes, I also… well… passed by Ino's flower shop"
Sakura's eyes widen as he finally shows her what he was hiding, revealing what seemed to be sunflowers, though they had some petals fallen off and the tips were dry. He chuckles sheepishly.
"They're a little messed up… because I crushed them when I hit the wall. But I can go and buy you new ones right now—!" He hurries to add, but by that time Sakura has finally found her voice again.
"—They're beautiful"
His blue eyes widen with surprise, and he can't quite hide the blush that colors his cheeks as he stares at her, giving him that smile, her eyes twinkling with something he couldn't quite put a name on but that made his heart beat a little faster.
"I—I mean it! I can go and buy fresh ones, Ino could use the extra money! I wouldn't mind at all!"
She only shakes her head, thoroughly amused by his stupor, her heart beating wildly inside her chest. "There's no need, really. They're beautiful enough as they are right now" Her eyes soften up as he stares at the three flowers carefully held between his fingers, "…You didn't have to.."
"But I wanted to" He gives her a grin, and when she looks up at him, he adds, "That's what Valentine's is there for, right? To give presents to those you care about"
Sakura chuckles softly, and gives him a smile "Shouldn't you be giving those to a girl you like, then?"
The effect her words have on Naruto is immediate, as he blushes and adverts his eyes, muttering things under his breath. His obvious stupor makes Sakura giggle behind her hand, "Well I thought… since I don't have a girlfriend or anything.."
"You don't have to explain, silly" If Naruto finds it weird that she's using such a soft insult, he says nothing of it. "I'm definitely not complaining, a girl always likes to get flowers. But you don't have a girlfriend because you don't want to"
"W-what!"
She giggles once again, delighted at the prospect of teasing him. "Girls have been throwing themselves at you for quite a long time now; take Yomire-san, for example. She did anything she could to get your attention"
It had annoyed her, of course. But right then, with his hand still in hers and he just having gifted her flowers in Saint Valentine's day out of all dates, she couldn't bring herself to care at all and was instead finding it all—specially his reaction, to be highly amusing.
"That's not true… you're imagining things, Sakura-chan" Naruto muttered finally, slightly pouting thanks to the fit of giggles Sakura was currently having. His embarrassed blush did nothing to help her calm down, though.
It was not until a good minute later, when her giggles had subsided somewhat, that she spoke once again. "But seriously, Naruto, don't you like someone or something?"
"Not really"
Suddenly, she isn't feeling so lighthearted anymore.
"I mean," Naruto starts, and she takes a second or two to wonder if her sobering up had been too obvious that even he had noticed, "There was someone, but she made it clear that she was interested in someone else so… I guess letting go has been a just a little hard"
His blonde head turns towards her when he finishes talking, and he's giving him a sheepish grin. But Sakura knows him all too well, and she can see the quiver in the edges of his lips, and the frown his hiding with that painful curve of his eyebrows.
She doesn't say anything about it.
"If you like this girl still, then you must love her a lot"
Her heart can't help but flip-flop when he answers her, his eyes once again focused on the ground under them.
"Yeah…"
He has finally given up on keeping that grin up, and instead he smiles, softly, fondly; but sadly all the same. And right then, she really wishes she could tell him what she has been keeping locked away behind her lips; she really wishes she could let it free, free him from that sadness that seemed to be possessing him.
But alas, that was not the moment. It wasn't the right time; not for him, not for her, not for them. So she kept her lips locked, her expression stern, her heart shut as she waited for him to continue what he had started to say.
"…But I'm happy enough with being her friend. I just want to see her happy. It's just… finding someone like her is kinda hard"
She watches him for a long time, watches him as he puts himself together and does his best effort to give her a carefree grin once again, tries to not say too much and reveal just about whom he was talking about.
Deep down, they both were aware that it wasn't a secret between them at all.
It's not until he opens his mouth to talk again, that Sakura decides that perhaps the moment wasn't so wrong after all. That perhaps there was something she could do without opening up yet.
That perhaps there was something she could do to prevent him to give up on her. That there must be something, because the thought of him giving up on her frightens her in ways she isn't ready to understand just yet.
"Naruto, has this girl ever told you she's still into this… other guy?"
He seems to think her words thoroughly, holding his chin and frowning thoughtfully. She already knows the answer he's going to give her, though.
"…No, but--"
Exactly. I haven't told you anything. So stop assuming things, you idiot.
"—Then you can't know for sure what she's feeling" She says with finality, and he blinks at her. For some reason, his apparent confusion annoys her, and she decides to be a little clearer, god forbid that big head of his doesn't caught on what she was trying to say. "Hell, who knows. She may have moved on and like you now"
The thought seems to string a chord inside him for an instant, as his eyes widen and shine with something very similar to hope—but then the instant is over and he's smiling sheepishly once again. "Nah, I don't think so, Sakura-chan. I'm not her type"
Holy mother—How dense can he be?! Isn't he seeing just with whom he's talking with?!
"Who says you're not her type?" She demands, a little more forcefully that she intended, and before he can say anything, she's speaking once again not even realizing what she's saying until it is too late. "Naruto, you're an amazing guy. You are anyone's type, and if someone disagrees then she's an idiot"
Sakura's eyes grow a little wider as she realizes just what she had said thanks to her bad temper, and it doesn't help to lower her embarrassment when she finds Naruto staring at her and completely taken aback.
Good, that makes two of us. I hate my big mouth.
Well, it was time to make errands. That is, of course, if she wanted her pride back.
She clears her throat.
"What I was trying to say was…" Was it her imagination, or were her hands sweating? "That people change through time. You won't know how she feels until you ask her. And if you love her so much, then fight for her."
"You owe it to yourself"
They fall in silence after that. There was nothing else to say, so she simply allows Naruto to let her words sink in, and focuses on the fireworks that were back and lightening the sky once again.
A particularly bright one explodes, and for a second, Sakura's eyes are drawn towards the sunflowers that were still held between Naruto's fingers.
The blonde seems to have noticed though, and before she can say anything he extended them towards her. "You don't have to get me anything, Sakura-chan. If that's what you were thinking"
He's giving her a sincere smile; honestly saying he doesn't expect anything in return. And it's the honesty behind his words what has her heart beating a little faster, her chest feeling a little warmer as she gives him a smile and takes the flowers, her fingertips deliberately brushing his as she does.
"Baka, who says I didn't buy you anything?"
She's lying, of course. She had wanted to buy him something, but her insecurities—not knowing if she was supposed to give him anything or not. What would she tell him when he asked the reason? Would it look too odd?—prevented her from doing so. Now she saw just how idiotic she had been.
But she doesn't think that Naruto deserves to know the truth—she regrets the truth. So she resorts to half-truths instead, and her choice is met with a soft blush on his cheeks and his eyes widening once again as if he was completely awed by the prospect of her giving him anything, the fireworks reflecting on those blue pools of his.
It all makes her grin.
"That's what I was going to say. You'll have to wait for your present a little longer, 'cuz I left it at my house. I'll give it to you tomorrow, alright?"
After ten full seconds of Naruto still staring at her, open-mouthed, still speechless. Sakura can't really avoid giving in, even though she'd probably reprimand herself about it later.
His skin is warm, when her lips meet his cheek. He smells of grass, and soap, nothing romantic and all and still Sakura feels herself loving every second of it anyway. It was characteristically Naruto-ish, that smell. And she had always wondered how those whiskers of his felt at touch…
Naruto's more flushed than she has ever seen him when she leans back, and the sight makes her lips curve into a grin once again.
"S-Sakura-chan! You…"
"Shh, stop talking or you'll make me regret what I'm about to do!" She says seriously, but playfully, and sticks her tongue out at him before explaining herself. "Since I feel sooo guilty about forgetting your present, I'll treat you to Ichiraku's tomorrow!"
His eyes widen even more, if possible.
"Sakura-chan… you don't have to.."
"What, you don't want ramen?"
"O-Of course I do! But at least let me pay, alright?"
"Nope. I said I was treating you"
"But that's not what gentleman's do!"
"Right, I had forgotten that 'every fiber of Uzumaki Naruto is full of gentlemaness!'" She rolls her eyes at his stupidity, but ends up smiling all the same. "But still, I don't care!"
"At least let me pay half of it!"
"Nope!"
"Sakura-chaaaaaaan! Don't be so mean!"
"Mean? I'm treating you, for god's sake!"
"But you know how much I eat! I'm going to leave you broke if you don't let me help you!"
Ouch, she had forgotten about that.
"Alright, alright. You win" Naruto grins, looking pretty pleased with himself as Sakura lifts her hands in defeat. "God, you're impossible"
He winks at her, extending his hand and doing a thumbs up.
And as she watches him, a smile makes her way to her lips.
"Naruto?"
He's still grinning when he answers her call, "Yeah?"
"Don't ever change"
It's amazing how easy it is for her to take him by surprise, she muses as she watches him wearing his emotions on his sleeve as always. Sakura though, is focused on finishing what she wanted to say.
"Don't ever change. Promise me, that no matter what happens, you'll never change"
"Sakura-chan…"
"Promise me, Naruto"
It may have been taken him a little longer to answer her, hadn't it been for the seriousness in Sakura's words and face. By the sheer determination that was shining in her eyes, the slight frown adorning her expression.
Right then, it occurs to him that there are things that he doesn't understand still. Things that Sakura still hasn't told him—and that he hasn't told her, either.
Right then, he decides that he's going to tell her it all—and more, as soon as Sasuke was back there with them, willing to watch the fireworks and enjoy himself.
After all, there was still time for them to become what they were supposed to be, right? If they were supposed to be anything at all, that is.
So he matches her seriousness with a determinate expression of his own, his lips curving in a smirk-like smile as he nodded at her.
"Alright"
"I promise you, Sakura-chan. No matter what, I won't change. I'll always be the same. It's a promise I'll keep with my honor"
She doesn't thank him. Not outwardly, at least. But she's sure there's no need for it—Naruto has been learning to read her, to look inside her eyes and find the answers to his questions, find the unspoken things she doesn't dare to say just yet.
Of course, with each step Naruto gives forward the closer he comes to finding out just how she feels about him. But she isn't so sure if she is so against that idea anymore.
"Well, this was quite a good Valentine's day, wasn't it?"
Naruto doesn't turn towards her, for he can hear the smile in her voice, can imagine the shine in her eyes, the fireworks shinning on her skin without needing to see her with his own eyes.
She looks beautiful. Ethereal.
She makes him smile.
"The best I've ever had"
And as they sit right there, still hand in hand, side by side looking at the fireworks, Sakura makes a silent promise.
'I promise, that next year, I'll be honest about how I truly feel about you. That's a promise… of a lifetime'
And right then, she squeezes his hand softly with hers.
She was planning to keep her promise.
- -
Owari
Alright, that was it xD Hopefully it was enjoyable and I'd really love to hear your thoughts! So please review! You know how important those are in order for us to fix our mistakes and improve.
Thanks for reading!