"Lilly? Lilly!" an annoying voice invaded my thoughts. Oliver.
"What, Oken?!" I asked, making it obvious that I was peeved.
"Are you going to eat that?" sigh, typical. Ignoring him, I resumed looking at my surroundings… looking for her.
"Are you okay, Lil? You seem a little distracted," Oliver said while chewing open-mouthed on my sandwich.
It was the first day of high school, a new me, reborn into a pitiful freshman. Lilly Truscott. I've got four miserable years ahead of me. Why…? Miley. Miley Stewart, she's done something to me.
This day, three years ago, school had just begun. I was the brightest sunflower, everyoneused to say, and I was the person who acted on impulse, saying without thinking. I remember going to the bulletin board to see who I had class with…
"Here's an unfamiliar name… Mi…ley Stewart?"
People were storming into class, and there she was, sitting shyly in the dark corner. Her hair fell down over her face, her eyes over a book. I went and sat next to her, trying not to seem intimidating.
"Hi! I'm Lilly!" I blurted out, a little too chipper. She looked up and bit her lip.
"Miley," she said, with a cute southern accent that I found quite appealing. She let out a small hand, accompanied with a (also small) smile. Her hands were soft. I didn't notice that Oliver stumbled onto a seat next to us. "Hi, pretty lady," he said, lifting his brows at Miley. Oliver was my best friend since the first grade, and this was a rare time where he was right about something. She was pretty.
The year went by regrettably quickly. Miley and I became best friends, a good thing.
She admired the things that appeared everyday which few people take note of anymore. Little flowers blooming from the crack on the sidewalk, the way the white clouds almost look painted on the blue sky, the way the wind blows in the trees. She likes grape juice – I thought I was the only one who did. She could care less for mainstream things. She prefers cold showers, cold weather. She played the guitar, the piano, and she sang. Sometimes it felt like she was too intelligent for me…she mumbled to herself all the time. Her favorite author is Edgar Allen Poe.
Basically, Miley was awesome. And she was my best friend. My awesome best friend. It's near the end of the year, but just in the past few weeks, I have been analyzing everything she does, says, and thinks. I've come to a conclusion that she makes me shake. The feeling is raw, and it's puppy love.
It's the last week of school, and today was like any other day, hanging out and doing whatever in her bedroom. I was watching Jackass and she was reading a book. I like watching Jackass, but it's stupid and sometimes I wonder if it makes me more of a tomboy. I wish I could read and not have to die of boredom.
Her eyes were riveted onto the book, and I couldn't help but smile from ear to ear. She looked up and gave me a weird look.
"Lilly, why are you looking at me like that?" asked Miley, smiling softly, with an intense curiosity.
She's never caught me looking at her before, and I've never thought about how I should answer her if she ever saw me staring.
"You're cute," I said, amazed at myself, for I have never told anyone they were cutebefore.
"So are you," she said casually, smiling cheekily, then resumed to her book.
I was hoping that she'd take it more seriously, but she still made me blush.
"Listen, Miles…" I felt a nervous quiver in my voice. What am I doing?
"Yes?" she looked up from her book, a little disappointed that I interrupted her.
"I kind of like you- no love you- as in more than a friend," I said quickly and blankly forgetting to pause in between. Wow, that was a bad move. A silence occurred, one that seemed to last an eternity. Kill me now, please. What did I just do…?
"Lilly…I don't like you like that," was all she said, looking down with an awkward expression, as if she had to fake her sympathy. I stared at her. I didn't know what to ask.
"…are we still best friends?" was all I could think of.
"Always…let's just forget this ever happened, okay?" she said, still not giving me any eye contact. Okay, whatever you say, Miley. The night moved on while we watched some crap on TV, I don't even care, I was thinking about what SHE could possibly be thinking. We didn't say a word, so to save her the hassle of kicking me out, I left with a simple "night". I wanted to make her happy, so I tried forgetting.
But I didn't, I couldn't. The next few days were complete and utter hell. I couldn't look her in the eye, she couldn't look me in mine, and only small talk would happen. I didn't tell Oliver what happened, I figured he was too immature and would do something stupid, like tell the whole school that I was in love with a girl. Oh well.
On the last day of school, she said these words to me: 'I'll always be your best friend, Lilly, always.'
That summer, she never called me. She never came to my house. She never invited me to her birthday party. She never came to the beach, when normally, she would everyday. She never wanted anything to do with me. When I would come outside to skateboard, I sometimes would see her looking at me from her bedroom window, but she would immediately withdraw from the window. Was I a freak? Middle school is starting in a few days. We are going to different schools, and it's going to kill me. I want the next two years to pass by like they were never there at all. I won't care. I still had Oliver.
Miley and I haven't talked or seen each other since. A few weeks before school started, Oliver told me that Miley was going to the same school as us. I hate the fact that I loved her. So here I am, feeling shitty as ever, looking for her. I don't know why I'm looking for her. I don't know, and I don't know what's going to happen. I'm on the beginning of a long, fucked up ride, and it's only lunch on the first day of school.
Now, I hope that wasn't too bad…