-1Al and his cats.

Al walked through the rain with the groceries for himself and Edo and began to lose himself in his thoughts. When he snapped back to reality, what else would he find but three kittens staring cutely at him. Now, since Edo was here you would imagine that these cats would hiss and scratch Edo and not stare at Al, right? Well, here comes Edo to not scare these cats…

"ALLLLL!!! What are you doing??? We still gotta see that dictator!" said Edo with a pissed look on.

"Ah…coming!"

Al took one last look at the cats… 'Ah…those poor cats…its raining …' So…he scooped up the cats and put them in his hollow armor…they were oddly quiet as well…

AT CENTRAL:

As soon as they walked in, trouble started…

"Ah! My sweet red shrimp!" said our sweet Ro--

"WHOTHEHELLAREYOUCALLINGASPECSOINDISTINGUISHABLETHATIT'SADOTONTHEBEACH?!" screamed Edo at poor defenseless Roy.

Well, while this happened Al stood there rather uncomfortably as the cats started playing…inside him

"Aaargrhh….." 'Ooops…' Roy and Edo were now staring at Al… "Al…something wrong?" Edo opened Al's armor in a hurry to check if something happened.

Edo's eyebrow began to twitch uncontrollably as he stared at the innocent cute kittens.

Roy just stared as Riza's beloved dog bounded into the room and began to pounce at the first thing he saw…which happened to be Roy.

Riza ran into the room with her gun and fired off about five rounds which just narrowly missed our dear Colonel Mustang who is at the moment frozen solid.

Surprisingly enough…the three precious kittens began to hiss…at no other than our favorite red clothed teen. Edward Elric.

"I couldn't just leave them in the rain!" Al said defensively and innocently while hiding the cats from Edo's glare.
Well the unexpected happened.
The cats ran out of Al and took none other but Edo hostage.

"Move and we'll pour milk down his throat." said the first cat

"WAIT…CATS DON'T TALK…WHAT IS THIS?!" as Ed stood unable to move

"Ah…I think the cats like you brother!" shouted Al happily

"Do you want me to shoot them for you?" said Riza calmly

"Ah…I could set them on fire…?" suggested Roy

"I could lock them in a bomb cage, set the cage on fire, throw the cage out the window, and then hug them…but that would be mean to the cats…" said Al innocently

At this point everyone in the room just stared at Al and began to back away slowly.
No one noticed the furballs of evil leave the room scared out of their minds…

A/N: Hmmm…this crack fic came out okay!
Edo: I WAS HELD HOSTAGE BY CATS?! WHAT THE FK?!
Riza: I have no complaints…
Roy: I do!…I didn't get to hold Riza even once!!!

Riza: WHY DIDN'T YOU GIVE ME ANOTHER TWENTY ROUNDS TO KILL ROY?!
Al:………………..
All: -stare at Al-

Al: I'M NOT A PSYCOPATH…WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME…THOSE CATS SHOULD COME BACK AND KILL YOU… .
A/N: Hmmmmmm…very interesting views…I'll see you in 6 - 8 weeks! With no changes! -runs away madly- HOPE YOU ENJOYED THAT, NO FLAMES PLEASE