DAMAGE
ohNkim
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KAI SEHUN
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Sehun centric
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A cheap ass story I made based on my angsty as fuck head. I wish nothing on this.
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Sehun never felt his friendship with Jongin being this damaged.
Well, maybe their friendship was indeed already damaged since Jongin's first dating issue revealed back in 2016. But it was never this wrecked. This 'New Year' issue was creating more havoc in their already defective relationship.
Back in 2016, the 'April Fools' incident. He knew it was coming. He knew that Jongin had dated Krystal and both Jongin and Krystal already coming 'clean' to their company and to the members so it was just need a clear one hour to confirmed that they were indeed dating when Dispatch finally dropped the bomb. Well, it wasn't that clear since they admitted to their relationship only because they caught Dispatch following them on their date. They both need protection and reassurance that the company would be on their side. Remember when the media said that Kaistal was originally planned out to be the '2016 New Year' couple? But it was held back until April Fools Day? And the revealed photos weren't as scandalous as they were supposed to be? Who did you think behind all that 'tame' reveal?
It was Sehun.
Okay, it was Sehun, his manager and Krystal. Because sometime (if not most of the time) SM was being a dick.
They 'hunted down' Dispatch to have a deal about whatever news and photos they had regarding Kaistal relationship. Krystal had initiated the idea about "shutting down" Dispatch temporarily by giving some amount of money to them (what else do they want if it wasn't money tho) because Jongin was being too bold with their date. Not wearing mask, being in an open place and places with bustling people. Not to mention that Jongin really liked couple stuffs. Just imagine how 'clear' their relationship was for people to see. And Krystal didn't want that. She liked privacy and closed her personal life for herself and people she thought worth to know.
So, she came to Sehun (and other members) since Jongin was against the idea because he thought he did nothing wrong by dating. It's his right, he said. Yes, he wasn't entirely wrong but it was that they didn't need "Baekyeon 2.0". Some of their fans were still immature and the group was still in the process of healing from the departure of their members. They didn't need any more scandal.
If you thought that EXO team staffs were bad, then f(x)'s were the worst. They didn't agree to help Krystal with her idea so it was all in EXO's side eventhough Jongin also disagree.
So Sehun came to the rescue (like a hero he was).
He planned out every deals with Dispatch and handed them the money they want under his manager's eyes and Krystal helped with being the 'scandal hunter's bias (he idolized her so much that he gave in so easily to the deals). Dispatch made it quiet for them for several months until the tickling bomb finally exploded.
Eventhough Sehun did the deal a bit reluctantly since his bestfriend that was Krystal's boyfriend was hiding the fact that he was seeing the girl since several months ago (he didn't even know the details), he still did it great. No scandalous photos or stories and the timing was just perfect that Krystal even laughed it out. April Fool's day, seriously? One couldn't be more confused to have such a big news on a fool's day. It was just like the Pomfrey's.
He didn't catch the idea as to why Jongin was hiding it from him. They had been friends since long long ago and Sehun thought that he was his bestfriend. Or was he the only one thinking that way? The members had told him that maybe Jongin just need his privacy. What side of the fucking privacy did they talk about? Jongin was more than willing to share almost his everything with him. It was always Sehun before anyone else, and it was always Jongin before anyone else, too.
He was feeling a little betrayed. Why? Because almost Jongin's other bestfriends knew. Even Jimin, the newest addition to their circle. Or was he being too blind he didn't see any sign that Jongin was dating? He for sure had asked Jongin about why he frequently went out at night (because Jongin loved his bed as much as he loved dancing), and he, for Vivi's sake, remembered that Jongin always answered him with 'out with my niece and nephew'. Sehun would nod, thinking that indeed Jongin was a family person, and he would ask about how they're doing without any suspicions because Jongin never lied to him. Sehun trusted him that much.
Sehun still couldn't grasp the fact that Jongin just hide something big from him, and if it wasn't because of Krystal, he bet he would know their relationship through the media, just like any other fans. His confusion was so deep that it's really hard to conceal. If it was a flaw on the face, maybe it needed a whole bottle of concealer to conceal it. But even as skilled as his usual resting-bitch-face level, Sehun still couldn't manage to cover it. His expression cracked on their group activity and he couldn't help but staring at somewhat-sad-and-scared-at-the-fans Jongin with a mix of confused and hurt expression.
He also didn't understand why he just felt it this way now. Shouldn't he feel betrayed since the very first? He thought that maybe because at first, he didn't have time to think about it (they're busy to plan and did the deals) or the fact that Jimin knew even far before he did. He just felt unfair. He really wanted to talked to Jongin because he never the type to push the problem to the back but rather solved it out quickly. But seeing the burdens on Jongin's shoulders, it's enough already. He didn't need his bestfriend to suffer more.
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Months passed and slowly, the ice between them was starting to melt away. He started to casually play with Jongin again on stage and off stage. Everything settled to how they used to be, with some addition of Krystal here and there since they befriend her even before (and Jongin just couldn't leave her side). When Jongin and Krystal broke up, they ended it in the good term and kept their friendship. Life was normal again for Sehun. He had his bestfriend again for himself.
Or so he thought.
The first day of the new year was supposed to be full of hope, full of smiles and laughter and bouncy steps. The day should be filled with joy and delight, with nice food and nice clothes. Young and adults, couples and singles would going here and there with better hopes they had in their chests.
It was what it was supposed to be for Sehun too.
But it was frantic here in EXO house (it's a house not a dorm) and SM building (and maybe in that YG building across the street too). The members had been woken up early in the morning despite the day off and the late sleep they had because of the New Year's Eve didn't really help their not-fully-awake state when they were being dragged to SM main building. They were woken up by the frantic knock on the door and their manager's repeating wake up, we have a meeting. They didn't even get the time to change and only covering their sleeping attire with a coat.
When they arrived at the building, it was a mess. They got into a meeting room, forced to sit on the chairs in front of the staffs and they handed them printed out news from an online source. Everyone got one bundle. Sehun scanned the paper when the staffs delivered it to every member and upon seeing the blue logo, Sehun knew it was Dispatch. Who is it this time? Sehun had thought.
Reading the hangul fast, Sehun felt like every blood had been drained from his face. He got even paler if he could. He kept boring hole to the paper on his hand, not minding whatever the staffs said nor what his members tried to defend.
What the actual fuck.
Jongin? For the second time? Shit.
"W-what?" Sehun snapped out of his thought. "Pardon, but what did you just say?"
The female staff sighed and looked at him with a stern face "Did you know about this?"
Sehun shook his head slowly but said nothing.
"Seriously?"
Sehun nodded, not believeing his own voice.
"You are his bestfriend. How come you don't know?"
"I don't know, too!" Sehun answered back a little too fast. "I didn't even know if I am still his bestfriend."
That earned him so many reactions. Loud gasps from Chanyeol and Baekhyun, bulging pair of eyes from Kyungsoo and Xiumin, a loud "what" and disbelieving look from Chen, Suho just stopped breathing momentarily and Jongin just hung his head really low.
"Don't ask me anything. I really have no idea about this."
With that, Sehun got out of the room, not minding the calls from the members or the staffs. He knew all of them understand what he meant and what he implied. He would deal with them later. His mind was clogged right now and they didn't need them to fog it further.
He reached the restroom and washed his face in the sink. He looked at his reflection in the mirror and heaved a heavy sigh. Time and again, Jongin did this to him. The feeling of betrayal was come back to him. Whatever the reason Jongin had, he didn't think he would understand it. Whatever Jongin had in mind, Sehun didn't think he would get it. It's this big and again, Jongin didn't share it with him. Privacy? Alright whatever. Sehun mentally rolled his eyes.
Sehun never recalled ever being a gossip. If whatever, Sehun was very closed person and trustworthy (it's what Baekhyun had told him). He also didn't remember ever being judgy. He never protested anyone's choices, never criticizes their taste. He was sassy, yes. But he wasn't a bad person. So why did Jongin didn't tell him? Whatever it was, Sehun couldn't think of it.
Inhaling a deep long breath, Sehun got out of the restroom and walk to the nearest vending machine that sold snacks. Thinking too hard in the morning made his stomach extremely hungry eventhough he had no appetite. But his stomach called loudly. The hallway was still empty, so he guessed that the members and staffs still held their meeting. Sehun shrugged and bought a pack of bread. He ate it while leaning on the wall beside the machine and decided to scroll on his phone.
The fans were seriously in a great shock. They didn't expect it, the tweet said. Well, so did he. 2019 started off strong, the other tweet said. The storm was stronger here in his heart and mind. He scrolled some more and come to a conclusion that both companies hadn't made any statement. He heaved a sigh again and lock his phone before returning to eat his bread. It tasted bland now so he threw the rest to the bin.
He didn't want to meet his members yet so he moved his legs to the rooftop, taking slow mindless step when climbing the stairs. He just sat on the corner where there was enough shade for him and just staring mindlessly at the clear sky. He took a deep breath and wrap his coat tighter, regretting the fact that he didn't get his muffler.
His head was full of buzz. Not that kind of buzz the alcohols gave you but still, both gave him the dizziness. Sehun closed his eyes and filling his lungs with clear air. He slowly drifted off to sleep without him realizing.
It was maybe an hour later or so that Sehun woke up. His body felt stiff and his neck was all sore. He slept in a wrong position he guessed. Stretching his long limbs, Sehun got up and headed downstair. He saw some staffs walking here and there, and he tried to become as invisible as possible. He didn't need people asking him questions about his so called bestfriend's relationship news like he did two years ago. He saw Baekhyun on the center hall and was about to pass him until the vocalist called his name. Sehun pretended not to hear and continued his walking.
"I knew your heard me the first time, Sehun!"
Sehun sighed and turned around, giving him a "what" face.
The smaller male approached him with a smile, "Wanna go somewhere? Maybe taking a late breakfast with me?" Sehun frowned at his crinkling eyes.
"No, thanks, Hyung. I had mine a while back. From the vending machine."
"I bet it didn't taste that good!"
Sehun just shrugged.
"Come on, have some meal with me?"
"No, hyung."
"Come on, Sehun-ah. Please?" Oh, he made that puppy eyes.
"No." Sehun insisted. "And I know you just want to give me comfort, but trust me, I don't need it, hyung. I'm fine"
Sehun finally walked away with his hands on his coat's pocket. He pulled his hood low so his face almost fully hidden. He knew Baekhyun meant well, he just wanted to comfort him like he always did. He was a great hyung, a very sensitive yet understanding hyung. He knew what others feel and always had his way to console those who felt down. He was just great like that. But Sehun didn't need him now. He was more than confused with how he felt and it was just a waste of energy for Baekhyun to console him.
Shouldn't he feel happy that his bestfriend was dating the finest girl in the kpop industry? No, it's not that he didn't happy. He felt betrayed. Again. He was his bestfriend. Why would he know all of this through the media? He really wanted to hit Jongin.
He waited in the foyer near the main entrance for his manager. He had no idea wether his members were already home or not, but seeing one of their cars was there, he waited for them. Minutes later, his manager, Suho and Baekhyun walked to his direction.
"Let's go home, Sehun." Suho said and Sehun nodded. "Jongin's still inside."
Sehun rolled his eyes at his last sentence—as if I care- and head to their car which already opened by the manager. He stayed quiet the whole ride and went straight to his room after they arrive.
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It was past midnight when Sehun finally came out of his room. A pair of sweatpants and his favorite black izro hoodie with coat wrapped around his arm cladding his body, iphone and his car key on his right hand. He walked past living room and saw Chanyeol and Baekhyun still awake, but paid no mind on them because sometime they were just a couple of night owls. He almost stopped his tracked when Baekhyun asked if he was going to go somewhere. Sehun just nodded and proceeded to the front door to get his car.
Once he got inside his car, he revved the engine and drove toward the location 'they' agreed. He knew this was so wrong but he couldn't help it. He indeed was a curious cat and he had this protective side kicked in. At first, he didn't care but it felt like he was being unfair to the other, so he just agreed to it.
He arrived at the location and parked his car. It was a park and it seemed like no one was here at this ungodly hour, except one person—two if he was included. Sehun pulled down his hood and walked toward the only person who stand near the tree.
"Sehun."
Sehun nodded at him and pulled up his hood a little so his eyes could be seen. "What do you have, hyung?"
Hyung, it was how he called this Krystal-biased-scandal-hunter. Yes, he was meeting him again after two years. The said hyung texted him saying that he had more 'juicy' photos of Jongin and his newly-confirmed-by-the-company girlfriend. It wasn't his business but he couldn't let his bestfriend suffer. So he agreed to it.
The photographer took out his camera and proceed to show him the compilation of Jongin's dating. It was quite a lot and he felt his eyes starting to water. He didn't know if it was because of the photos or because of the glaring brightness from the small screen. Sehun took a deep breath and gave back the camera to its owner. "Give me the memory card, I will hand you your money."
The hyung smiled too wide Sehun almost slapped him. He rolled his eyes instead and fished out his phone from his pocket, ready to transfer the money from his mobile banking account. The other person handed him the card and Sehun clicked 'transfer' on his phone. "You sure you don't have any copy of this?" Sehun asked.
The other shook his head and made an ok gesture with a smile. "I never lied, if that's what you mean."
Sehun just nodded and bid his farewell before heading to his own car.
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Days had passed—maybe around a week and Sehun hadn't spoken to Jongin even for a word unless it was needed during their group activity. Why would he? Jongin didn't look like he want to talk to Sehun, so he just played along. The hyung was the ones looked so tense everytime they saw the maknaes in the same room until one of the dancers retreated back to his room or to go out.
Their leader was the one breaking the ice or whatever that was between the maknaes, saying that he couldn't stand seeing his members fight or having cold shoulder toward each other. We didn't fight, Sehun snapped. The leader just sighed and told him to at least clear whatever it was between them.
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"What is it, Sehun? Are you mad at me?"
It was Jongin who suddenly broke the group's laughter on their late dinner at night. The whole table paused for a while before everyone's head directed to Jongin before eventually moved to his. They had this shocked and anxiety expression that Sehun didn't like. No one dared to continue their meal.
"What?" Sehun asked nonchalantly while taking a spoonful of his meal.
"Are you mad at me?" Jongin repeated. "We didn't even talk for days."
The maknae shrugged. "It wasn't me, It was you who didn't talk."
The tan male took a deep breath and his gaze pierced through Sehun's. "You are my bestfriend. Shouldn't you be happy that I finally moved on and has a girlfriend now?"
Sehun looked at him in disbelieve. His bitch face showed stronger than anything. "Like hell I am your bestfriend. You know what, Jongin? You better welcome Dispatch as your bestfriend since they know you more than I do." Sehun spitted the last sentence like a dragon fuming its fire from its nose. With that, he stood and walked out of the dining room, uncaring about his still full plate. He heard Junmyeon desperate sigh a this is why I told you to never have a big talk on dinner.
Maintaining a bestfriend-relationship is hard. And the fact that he had this little crush on his so called bestfriend didn't help.
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I feel so angsty what the fuck.
And, hello again 😊