It's The Worst Feeling Of All

by: Wings Out

Summary: I know who I am. I know that I can never be normal. I know I'm a freak. You should be able to accept that. Why can't you?

This is a brief outline of the feelings Iggy felt when his parents sold him to the magazines, wanting to make money. He knows what parents are. And this wasn't that.

I am not that person.

I do not truly know who I am.

I am not perfect—far from it.

I am not a genius, I am not even considered smart in the eyes of others.

But I know what is best for me.

I know that self-preservation is key and love is the doorway.

Why can you not accept me for who am I?

Am I repulsive to you?

Do you not love me in the way a parent should love a child?

I am not a child anymore. Experience has made me into something so much more.

You keep telling me that I am spoiled. That I'm a freak and can never amount into anything.

I know. I know what you're trying to tell me. I know what I am.

Is there something so wrong with that?

You tell me to get off from the edge that I shouldn't try to fall.

Well, the truth is, I have wings. I can fly. You can't.

You phone the reporters. You tell them you have an actual avian hybrid on your hands and that I'm a ticking money mint.

I know.

You tell them this is a once in a lifetime chance and you cannot wait.

I know.

You tell them that "James" is so excited for this.

I'm not.

You tell them "James" will be fully participating.

I won't.



You tell them that he doesn't know about the meeting, but he'll be loving it when they arrive.

I know about it. But I won't be loving it. Far from it.

Is this what you're trying to say?

Be somebody in the eyes of the world, so that I can be somebody as well through you.

Is this what you are telling me?

Don't go. It was such a sacrifice for me. Don't throw away this chance again. I can never get another opportunity like this.

Is this? I understand.

What you're trying to say is, I know suffering. You do not know suffering. I know the real world. You don't. I know everything. You're stupid.

I know suffering. I know it every day of my life.

I wonder every day if each one of us is going to die. If one day evil will win. If one day we'll find our loved ones.

I know the real world.

I think about if one of us is going to fight to the death. If one day they will come for us. If one day I can't run anymore.

I don't know everything. I admit everything. I admit I am blind, I am handicapped, I'm a burden to others.

Can you not accept that?

Can you not accept me for who I am?

Max raised me. She loved me from the day I was born with chicken wings, to the day I will die with my eyes closed.

You won't.

I accept that.