A/N: Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy Life Day! I'm sorry that I've really sucked with updates these past few weeks. I owe people some chapters and I'm also working on updating Indulgence and Sweetly Shaken, which will hopefully all or partially be done at some point during the week! I hope everyone had a wonderful day!
This was entered in the StarWarsWritersClub Christmas Contest 2013 on deviantART – I'll update you on results once they're in.
•◊•
Jedi were sent to battle every day since the beginning of this war. The Clone War as it had been publicly deemed. For the past two years, that's how life has been. Not a single soul has seen it differently since post-Geonosis. There hadn't been many special events throughout the war. Not even Life Day could change one man's attitude or outlook on life. However, the apprentice had been trying since he was ten years old to affect his Master on this particular day. It wasn't until the battle of Calavi II that he finally submitted to his insistent Padawan.
"Master, look," Anakin Skywalker, Chosen One and Hero With No Fear, said as he pointed up at the blazing sky. When Obi-Wan's eyes followed, several of their gunships descended from the atmosphere. They were carrying the troops Anakin and Obi-Wan had called for almost a week ago. The two Jedi were certain that they would die within the week since their supplies and men were limited as it was.
For the first time in at least two months, Obi-Wan Kenobi sighed in relief. Fighters shot down at the oncoming waves of droids and Obi-Wan took that as a godsend. "Fall back to the base!" he cried out. Anakin's wave of joy and relief was replaced by that of disappointment. He was never one to willingly retreat from battle. Obi-Wan turned, his lightsaber still ablaze, and rested his free hand on Anakin's shoulder. "We're going to regroup at the base and return shortly, Anakin." The smoldering ice in Anakin's eyes seemed to be enough for Obi-Wan. Anakin understood despite wanting to go against his former Master's orders.
Racing along the terrain of Calavi II seemed humorous to the famed Negotiator. It was a multitude of weathers all balled up into this single planet. The atmosphere was affected differently in certain portions and they'd been lucky enough to fight on the grasslands for the last two to three weeks. However, the terrain seemed to shift today – and horribly so. Somehow, they'd ended up quite a distance behind their retreating troops. Wind shot at the Jedi's backs and chilled them to the bone almost instantly.
Both of them halted immediately and spun around. Much to Anakin's chagrin, a snowstorm was forming directly overhead. Growing up on Tatooine had not prepared him for this. Anakin's eyes darted across the land, trying to find something they could hide in until the storm passed. Unfortunately, it came all too quickly for them. Both men were on the ground, nearly buried in snow within seconds.
Obi-Wan wasn't affected as greatly as Anakin was by the snow, so he'd been able to move the snow away and get back onto his feet with ease. He searched for his young friend and, unable to find him, panicked when he could hardly sense the other man. They were hardly dressed for such harsh weather and Anakin nearly froze to death their very first visit to Hoth when he was a Padawan. Obi-Wan knew he had to find Anakin quickly or he may lose Anakin to hypothermia.
Fortunately, he'd been able to spot the black, leather glove his friend wore over his cybernetic hand. Leaping towards the black glove, Obi-Wan grabbed the hand and yanked. A shivering Anakin was pulled above the sea of snow and stared up at Obi-Wan helplessly. Anakin's body still wasn't accustomed to this much cold. Obi-Wan was able mask his chill by means of the Force. Anakin attempted to stand on his own, but required Obi-Wan's help. His former Master was much stronger than he looked. Anakin knew firsthand that this man possessed a great deal of power, power that should not be reckoned with.
"J-Just g-go," Anakin whispered.
Obi-Wan shook his head and half carried, half dragged the younger man through the snow. "I won't leave you behind, Padawan." Normally, that would have the younger man grimacing. At this particular moment in time, Anakin managed to give the other man a small smile. Obi-Wan wasn't speaking to him as though he were being condescending. The tone Obi-Wan took with him was affectionate.
The two men made it to a nearby cave and Obi-Wan attempted to lower Anakin onto the cool ground. However, Obi-Wan ended up falling down onto his rear with Anakin collapsing on top of him in a shivering heap of Chosen One. "Ugh…" Anakin groaned, trying to push himself up slightly. "So c-cold…"
The Jedi Master sighed and shifted Anakin. He was still holding onto the young Jedi, but his space wasn't so invaded this time. "If you'd ever listened to me about stabilizing your body for temperature changes, we wouldn't be having this problem," he muttered. Their clothing was soaked all the way through and that didn't seem to help Anakin's case.
"T-There is o-one w-way to w-warm up," Anakin managed, shutting his eyes, bracing himself against Obi-Wan. He rubbed his arms roughly, trying to warm them up.
Obi-Wan knew Anakin had a one track mind and there was only one thing on his mind when he wasn't on the battlefield indulging his reckless need for adrenaline. "I will not take my clothes off," Obi-Wan replied assertively. He was aware of the way Anakin felt about him and chose not to indulge that part of Anakin. "You're far more insane than I thought you were if you believed that would work on me." Unfortunately, Obi-Wan reciprocated those feelings Anakin held towards him. He wanted so desperately to hold Anakin, kiss Anakin, smile at Anakin as lovers do.
Anakin scoffed quietly, nuzzling Obi-Wan's chest before speaking. "W-Was j-just a s-suggestion."
Rolling his eyes, Obi-Wan pushed Anakin's hands down and pulled Anakin closer to him, sharing in the other man's warmth. Well, what was left of it anyway. He gently stroked Anakin's arms, mimicking what Anakin had been doing. "I'd sooner allow you to become a glacier than take my clothes off for you," he said sarcastically, though it was only half-hearted sarcasm.
Anakin snorted and shook his head slowly. "Even on L-Life D-Day?"
"Even on Life Day," Obi-Wan repeated. He paused. He never mentioned the day in the time he's known Anakin, which he realized he'd finally slipped up on. Anakin snickered quietly as he shivered and Obi-Wan closed his eyes. "Saying it doesn't mean we're celebrating it."
The most Obi-Wan had ever done for Anakin on Life Day was give him a small stone that he'd received from Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan had been thirteen then and he'd saved the stone to pass along to his young Padawan when he turned thirteen. Anakin insisted upon giving Obi-Wan small gifts in return: setting the kitchen on fire, being scammed out of over a thousand credits for fake tickets, getting arrested as a fifteen year old for stealing Obi-Wan's favorite alcoholic beverage, and the like.
It was the thought that counted though, right? "Y-You k-keep s-saying that," Anakin whispered, seemingly taunting his Master. Obi-Wan decided that responding to that with some smart comment would only give in to Anakin's pleasure.
For several hours the two stayed in that cave. Their clothes had managed to dry a little and Anakin was able to speak without stuttering now. "You keep tinkering with that damn thing and getting the same results, Anakin. Just face it – there is no signal out here and especially not in this blizzard."
"You keep saying that," he said once again, still fiddling with his comlink.
"I have been saying that since you woke up from napping on me and decided to toy with your com." The irritation flooded over Anakin, but he shrugged it off. He knew Obi-Wan was only irritated because they weren't able to leave the cave and he's made Obi-Wan feel uncomfortable. He wasn't happy to make his best friend uncomfortable, but decided it was better than sitting beside him awkwardly, wishing he could have more than Obi-Wan was willing to give him.
"Careful, Master," he said, smirking a little to himself, "your feelings lead to the dark side." Needless to say, snow was tossed at his back. He could have sworn he heard Obi-Wan call him a bastard, but he wouldn't have been shocked unless he hadn't. Anakin looked out at where the light shined in at the opening of the tunnel and sighed. "How much longer do you think this will last until it lets up?"
The older man shrugged and slid down onto the ground, pulling his cloak over him. "I don't know. It will more than likely be a full rotation before we're in warmer temperatures." Anakin shuddered. If Obi-Wan didn't get back to base and changed into clothing that wasn't cold and wet, they'd both go insane with Obi-Wan's crankiness.
"I'm hungry," Anakin muttered to himself, setting the comlink down beside him. There was no way he would make a long-distance call in this weather or while they were in the cave.
As soon as Anakin turned around he regretted it. "If I hear another complaint about how cold it is, how hungry you are, or how tired you are, I will become a cannibal." Swallowing, Anakin nodded. Obi-Wan sounded very menacing when he said that and Anakin had learned as a Padawan not to question or joke around with Obi-Wan when he spoke in that tone. "I suggest you go curl up in a corner and nap." He turned over, giving Anakin his back once again.
Obi-Wan was already huddled into himself on one side of the cave. Anakin contemplated laying down on his own side, but decided against it. Why should he sleep away from his friend? They've shared beds, tents, and rooms for as long as he could remember. Sleeping across the cave didn't seem like an option. He loved being close to Obi-Wan. It made him feel safe, secure, and filled him with warmth. Obi-Wan was beneath his own cloak and Anakin figured that having two cloaks over the both of them was better than having one covering them alone.
"Move over," he whispered, nudging Obi-Wan's back with the toe of his boot gently. Obi-Wan didn't do as Anakin asked and Anakin sighed, dropping down to his knees. He shoved Obi-Wan over, forcing him closer to the wall.
"Anakin, what in the blazes?" he exclaimed, turning over quickly, only to find himself chest to chest with his very sensuous, frowning, young friend. His next complaint died before it left his throat. He had never turned over to face Anakin while they laid beside each other, though he would have liked to on many occasions. Anakin laid on his side, facing Obi-Wan. He looked innocent, but Obi-Wan knew better than that. "Just don't rub your leg against mine tonight, all right?"
Anakin's slight frown immediately became a grin. Obi-Wan instantly regretted compromising with Anakin. He should have used his menacing masterly tone on the young man again and forced him to go sleep on the other side of the cave as they had intended on doing earlier. He sighed slightly and made to turn over, but Anakin's hand flew out, touching Obi-Wan's chest. Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow in question and Anakin looked up at him, clearly hurt, though Obi-Wan would have liked to argue that. "You don't have to turn away, you know…" He sounded like the shy, young boy he'd been during his first few months at Obi-Wan's side.
He knew he should have turned over like the Jedi Master in him wanted to, but he also wanted to see Anakin. He'd watched the younger man sleep before and it was very peaceful, until a wave of anger and fear washed over him as he slept. Nightmares always plagued Anakin's mind when Obi-Wan wasn't within arm's reach of him.
For a long while, they stared into each other's eyes, seeming to question each other silently. Obi-Wan knew Anakin loved him and he'd tried so hard to downplay Anakin's emotions for the last two years. It wasn't until the horror of Geonosis had passed that Anakin admitted his feelings for his then Master. Obi-Wan wasn't able to give him a straightforward answer when asked whether or not he loved Anakin, too. There were so many things he wished he could say to Anakin, but he was afraid to, fearing what it would do to the young man.
Anakin is a passionate man. His passion burns far more than it remains calm. If Anakin were energy, he would have burst into flames years ago. If he could have his way, he and Obi-Wan would be together. Obi-Wan stood by his Jedi principles though and would not give into Anakin. Anakin's you keep saying that would have actually been warranted this time. "Can we go to sleep now?" Obi-Wan asked, sighing.
Anakin gave him a sly smirk. "When you wake up, it'll be Life Day, Master."
"And we still won't be celebrating it."
"Sure, whatever you say." Rolling his eyes, he moved closer to Obi-Wan, moving close enough to actually hear Obi-Wan's heart beat. It was something that always soothed him. As a boy, he'd been able to fall asleep to that sound. It was his one way of knowing Obi-Wan was really alive, wasn't some figment of his imagination.
Obi-Wan reluctantly slipped an arm over Anakin's midsection. He felt the tight muscles on Anakin's back and couldn't resist rubbing them. He'd done this with Anakin when Anakin was twelve and having nightmares. Why did it feel so awkward now that Anakin was twenty-two? Obi-Wan stared down at Anakin, knowing full well that the young man was putting himself into a trance so that he would fall asleep faster tonight.
That always meant he was afraid of having a nightmare. When he was that afraid, he would force himself to sleep instead of allowing sleep to come to him. That worried Obi-Wan. Unfortunately, Anakin made quick work of the trance and was fast asleep within seconds. Sighing, Obi-Wan tangled his fingers in Anakin's hair, kissing the crown of his head.
Just tonight, he told himself moments before lapsing into sleep himself.
•◊•
"Master," a soft voice called into Obi-Wan's hazy dream. "Obi-Wan." That voice got slightly louder. "Damn it, Obi-Wan, will you wake up?" Then he was being shaken. His eyes flew open and he saw Anakin's gorgeous face before him, invading his space far more than he's ever done before. "It's about time," he breathed.
Obi-Wan sat up, resting his hand on Anakin's bent knee. "What time is it?"
"Time to get the hell off this rock," Anakin said cheerily. "The transport commed me five minutes ago and is on its way. Master Windu was able to finish what we started after arriving yesterday, so we're heading home."
Home, Obi-Wan echoed in his mind. Coruscant was their home. The Temple was their home. Anywhere Anakin went was home to Obi-Wan, even the battlefield. He took comfort in Anakin's presence. It was such a homely presence. "Well, what are we waiting for?" Anakin took his hand and helped his Master to his feet. They picked their cloaks up and wrapped themselves up. The cloaks were still slightly wet and very cold, but it would be fine in a matter of an hour or so. They would be aboard a flagship in no time, able to shower and eat and rest.
The transport arrived mere minutes later. When the transport opened, Mace Windu stood with his arms crossed, an eyebrow raised. "You two look terrible." Anakin sensed that that may have been pointed more so at him, but chose to ignore him. He didn't need to be told whether or not he looked good. He took pride in what the HoloNet said about him and even in passing compliments from Obi-Wan.
"Ah, well, did you spend the night with Anakin during a snowstorm?" Obi-Wan was teasing, but Anakin scowled.
"It wasn't that bad, Master," he murmured, brushing past the older man to board the gunship. Obi-Wan stared at his back wide-eyed. He hadn't meant to insult Anakin by any means. It wasn't supposed to be taken as an insult. Mace found it somewhat humorous. Why didn't Anakin?
Sighing, Kenobi boarded the gunship, standing just slightly behind Anakin. He could feel waves of tension rolling off of his former Padawan and a pang of guilt hit him. He wanted to make amends for the insult his joke brought about, but this was neither the place nor the time to do so, which left him with one very unwanted option.
Anakin wanted to celebrate Life Day.
He was such a child every time this year since he'd become Obi-Wan's Padawan. Even at twenty-two Anakin acted like a child. It was as though he hadn't faced any horrors of the war, as though he hadn't matured. But he had and Obi-Wan knew that. Anakin insisted on almost a daily basis that he was no longer a child. Since admitting his feelings to his Master, Anakin kept pressing the issue, declaring that he was an adult, not a hormone-driven youth.
He supposed celebrating Life Day wasn't such a bad thing. Anakin would go about his normal routine upon returning to Coruscant, so that would give Obi-Wan two hours to prepare everything. He already began forming ideas that would definitely bring a smile to Anakin's features. He rested one hand on Anakin's tense back and smiled faintly, even as Anakin gave him a look of question.
Oh, Obi-Wan hoped Anakin would enjoy tonight.
•◊•
"Blasted thing!" Obi-Wan cursed. Everything was almost complete. As it had been before, his only issue was the tree. He hardly decorated it and each time he added something, he need to subtract something else. It would never look perfect at this rate and it made him feel inadequate. He hadn't done something like this for Anakin in years. They both hardly celebrated anything anymore. Since Anakin turned eighteen, the only celebrations they had included a nice glass of the finest Mandalorian Wine Coruscant had to offer.
A drink wouldn't do it tonight. It wasn't enough to satisfy Obi-Wan, so it definitely wouldn't satisfy Anakin. He couldn't settle for such little things because Anakin was so big to him. Anakin went out of his way to decorate the apartment for Obi-Wan's birthday each year. The least Obi-Wan could do was put that much effort into Life Day for his best friend.
He'd managed to erect the tree properly, but the ornaments he'd bought just didn't seem to make it any better in his eyes. Of course, he could just see Anakin's eyes lighting up at the sight of them when he'd first bought them over a decade ago. "Master, can we buy these?" he'd asked in that small voice he'd possessed prior to hitting puberty.
He recalled each time Anakin's voice had sounded that small over the years. For a man who seemed larger than life on the HoloNet, he could become the smallest man in the galaxy with the biggest heart. He glanced at the chrono in the corner of the room and sighed. He had less than half an hour to finish now.
The most unfortunate part was that he couldn't decide on a gift to give Anakin. All he'd ever wanted from Anakin was Anakin. He didn't need a gift any greater than that which he'd already received and he'd been given Anakin annually for over a decade. That was all he could ask for, whether it be for Life Day or his birthday.
He quickened his pace, redoing the arrangement of ornaments on the tree and garland he'd strung around the apartment. Lights flickered on the tree slowly and, when he stood back to look at it, it didn't seem too bad. He wasn't very happy with it, but he didn't know what else to do. He didn't want to disappoint Anakin. That brought a frown to his face. What if Anakin didn't like this? What if it was all wrong?
He wasn't given time to ponder these questions as the door clicked and slid open. Spinning around, he was met by a deep gasp. He watched Anakin stare in awe around the living room and his heart skipped a beat. He hadn't pictured Anakin looking this delighted when he'd first begun decorating. He stood awkwardly at the center of the dimmed room. The only light was coming from the tree and the candles along the side of the room. "You did all this?" He spoke softly, staring at Obi-Wan affectionately. Within a moment, realization dawned on him. This wasn't something Obi-Wan would normally do. "But why? I thought you didn't want to celebrate?"
Obi-Wan shrugged and tentatively took a step closer to Anakin. "I didn't at first," he whispered. That, Anakin already knew. It was blatantly clear that Obi-Wan didn't like celebrations of any kind. "I know you wanted to and I…"
He watched Anakin's mouth open once again and his jaw hung for a moment. "You did this for me?" Obi-Wan's face began to burn as Anakin entered the room, the door sliding to a close behind him after he'd passed the threshold. He dropped the bag he'd held in his human hand. Obi-Wan hadn't even realized it until it hit the floor.
The next thing he registered was Anakin flinging himself at the older man, his arms wrapping around Obi-Wan tightly. Obi-Wan was taken aback at first, not particularly enjoying such a close proximity to this man. However, he'd decided that he could let go of the Jedi Code and his principles tonight. "You like it then?" he asked quietly, timidly.
Anakin chuckled, breathing on Obi-Wan's neck. His breath was warm and Obi-Wan closed his eyes. When Anakin pulled away, Obi-Wan's eyes reopened. "Like it?" he asked incredulously. "Obi-Wan, I love it!" He grinned widely at his best friend and nearly bounced around the room as he inspected the decorations, adoration the only thing he felt as he soaked in all that Obi-Wan had done for him.
"Then you'll love this even more." Anakin raised an eyebrow as Obi-Wan went to gather two glasses as a bottle of Mandalorian Wine. The smile on Anakin's face said it all and he quickly moved towards Obi-Wan, who'd begun pouring the fine liquid into the glasses.
Giving Obi-Wan a delighted grin, he lifted his half full glass to Obi-Wan. "To you," he whispered, "for all that you've done for me, Obi-Wan, and all that you will probably do despite wanting to strangle me for nearly getting you killed on a daily basis." He winked and Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. They clinked their glasses together and drank slowly, savoring the wine. Anakin returned to observing the beautiful decorations once more and Obi-Wan couldn't help but stand still and watch him.
"The only thing I regret," he began, drawing Anakin's attention for a moment, forcing him to pause, "is that I didn't get you a gift." He felt genuinely guilty and regretful. Anakin had come home early. Perhaps he should have gone out for a gift earlier in the evening. He would have something to give Anakin then.
The young man was shaking his head, laughing lightly as he came closer to Obi-Wan. He set his glass down and took Obi-Wan's, doing the same, setting it gently beside his own. Tentatively, Anakin took Obi-Wan's hands and entwined their fingers gently, treating Obi-Wan as if he were a delicate item, which he was to Anakin. "Oh, my sweet Master," he whispered, the candlelight dancing on his features. "The only thing I have ever wanted as a gift is you." Obi-Wan couldn't help but smile at that. "You're actually holding my cybernetic hand," he added quietly, glancing down.
Obi-Wan had given Anakin the impression that he loathed the inhuman hand, but he truly didn't. It was part of Anakin and Obi-Wan accepted that, even as he watched and helped Anakin relearn his hand. Obi-Wan struggled with his emotions and thoughts for a moment. He truly wished to tell Anakin that he reciprocated his feelings, but he wasn't sure how to. "I love you," he finally said. "I always have and I always will." Their eyes lifted and locked.
Anakin smiled widely at his Master. "I love you, too," he replied, "but you already knew that." He smirked a bit and Obi-Wan desperately wanted to press his lips against that smirk. "Happy Life Day, Master," he whispered, "and thank you." It was rare that Anakin truthfully enjoyed something Obi-Wan did, but that was because it was rare for Obi-Wan to do something so out of the Code's boundaries.
This was another boundary he was willing to pass tonight. Leaning forward, Obi-Wan gently pressed his lips against Anakin's, reveling in the softness of them. This was their first kiss and it surely wouldn't be their last. He would make sure of that. The kiss was soft, long, and affectionate. When they parted, Obi-Wan was unable to regain the breath he'd lost while he'd been lip locked with Anakin. That smile was breathtaking.
He took pride in knowing he was the reason Anakin was smiling. He would give anything to keep him from frowning or hurting ever again. Anakin was truly happy and it was because Obi-Wan had given him the best gift he'd ever received in his lifetime. Obi-Wan gave himself to Anakin and Anakin gave himself to Obi-Wan. He gently pressed his lips against Anakin's once more, lifting a hand to stroke his cheekbone softly. This smile was something extremely rare since the war broke out. For one night every year, Obi-Wan decided, he would do everything in his power to see Anakin smile like this, look at Obi-Wan like this. "Happy Life Day, Anakin."