August 2006 Challenge

Author: Tiina

Rating: PG13, for language

'A Sudden Realization'

You Can Never Plan the Future by the Past

-Burke

"Ranger, you don't have to do this."

"Give it a rest, Tank. My mind is made up."

Ranger took one last look at the apartment. It hadn't felt like home except for the short time that Stephanie had stayed with him. As he was taking his memories with him, there wasn't much else to miss.

In the weeks following the shooting, he'd made the arrangements as he healed. It was time for Ricardo Carlos Manoso to disappear. It was the last thing he could do for her. For both of them, really.

Tank kept silent as he watched his friend say goodbye to his life. 'Idiot' he thought to himself. 'Well, Carlos isn't often stupid. I just hope that by the time he comes to his senses he's got a life to come back to.'

Advice is seldom welcome, and those who need it the most, like it the least. -Lord Chesterfield

The two men rode the elevator together, comfortable in their silence. At the garage, he decided to give it one last shot. "Ranger."

The smaller man sighed. "What now? We've been all through this."

"I know. You're doing this for Julie and Stephanie, 'the noble hero, fading off into the sunset', blah blah blah."

"It's the only way to keep them safe, and you know it."

"I know no such thing. Keeping your distance from Julie didn't protect her-"

"Wrong!" Ranger cut him off. "Scrog wouldn't have known about her if he hadn't tailed me to her. If I'd have stayed away like I should have, she'd never have been involved."

"Water under the bridge, man. The point is, her name and face have been all over the news. As has yours. Anyone looking now knows exactly where to go."

"I've done what I can about that."

"I know. Kid's got more damned security than the first family."

Ranger shrugged. "It makes her feel better. Ron and Rachel too."

"And you." When Ranger didn't contradict him, he moved on. "Bombshell attracts enough trouble on her own, you know."

Ranger took a deep breath. "I know. I'm counting on you to look out for her."

"And I will. But she's not going to call me when she feels something hinky and you know it. I won't know about anything until someone actually makes a move."

"I'll talk to her. I was planning to go by there on my way out of town anyway."

"And tell her what? That despite the fact that you're abandoning her, she should call me?"

"I. Am. Not. Abandoning. Her."

"So you say. Doubt she's going to see it that way."

"Enough of this." Ranger tossed his bag into the truck, feeling a twinge in his shoulder.

Tank noticed his wince. "Carlos."

He paused, but didn't turn around.

"I never pegged you for a coward, man." At this, Ranger did turn to face his friend. "You've proven you're willing to die for them. Now ask yourself a harder question."

He raised a brow, waiting.

"Are you willing to live for them?"

Without a word, he climbed into the truck. As he started to back out of his parking space, Tank had to have the last word.

Shouted over engine noise, Ranger still heard him.

"Who are you protecting? Them? Or you?"

Those who don't make decisions never make mistakes.

-Anonymous

It's late. Stephanie was probably already in bed. Maybe it would be better to sneak in and leave her a letter. It would save the argument. She won't understand. Ranger heard Tank's voice in his head. 'I never pegged you for a coward.'

"Shit." I've got to get my head straight before I talk to her. After one last look up at her darkened window, Ranger slowly pulled out of her lot.

He drove for hours, in no particular direction. I should do this more often. The silence inside the truck left him alone with his thoughts. After a while, his choices were clear.

He couldn't protect her from the periphery of her life. Would she let him in, all the way? Could she accept being in his life? He didn't know, and there was only one way to find out.

One of the surest evidences of friendship that one individual can display to another is telling him gently of a fault. If any other can excel it, it is listening to such a disclosure with gratitude, and amending the error.

-Edward Bulwer

He turned the truck around and headed back toward Trenton. Bottom line? I don't want to leave her. Ever. He smiled as he pictured waking her. He had a much different conversation in mind than the one he'd originally intended.

He picked up his phone and dialed a familiar number, smiling as he heard his friend swear.

"Somebody better be dying. Do you know what fucking time it is?"

"Tank."

"Ranger? I thought you were long gone."

"I'm heading home."

Tank was silent, having the decency not to say 'I told you so.' Finally, he asked. "When should we expect you?"

"I'm off the grid for a few days. Weeks, maybe."

"We'll expect you when we see you then."

"I'm taking Steph to meet the family, I hope. She'll need a mental health break after that."

"She's tougher than you think. And she's got a crazy family of her own. I bet she runs rings around you, and your family too. But it would do you both good to get away for a while, straighten things out."

Ranger laughed for the first time in days. "Thanks, man."

"What are friends for?"