First things first- all you bitches better thank GundamPilot03 for convincing me to write this sequel. Then you have to watch at least one episode of each of the following TV shows, for giving me something of a plot to work with- Law & Order, CSI, Without a Trace, Law & Oder: SVU, and NCIS. Got all that? Good. Now go ahead and read the story.
Of the four occupants of Duo's house, he could be considered the closest to normal, which was a very scary thought, indeed.
Duo, at age 17, had already killed more people than he could conveniently count. His hair very nearly reached his knees, and his eyes were bright violet. He had never known his parents, never attended a school dance, and begun working at age 8.
And he was cleaning house with a couple of demons and a holy being.
His mentor/boss/mother/older sister/friend/confidant/guardian, Death, was in the living room, singing along with the radio and dusting. She looked almost exactly like Duo; small wonder, since she'd modeled Duo after herself when she'd created him, with one exception. Then again, Duo was very, very glad Death had decided not to make him a girl.
Sissa, Death's girlfriend and a succubus, was scrubbing the kitchen floor. She was in her natural form, rather than a human guise – gray skin, fangs, large red bat wings, claws, and absolutely no clothes. Duo despaired of ever impressing on the lust demon that she had to wear clothes around humans.
Trowa had opted for laundry. He was in the laundry room, folding the last load out of the dryer with practiced efficiency, probably humming, although Duo couldn't tell over Death's enthusiastic singing. Trowa was God's Child, possessed of enough power to destroy all of humanity and maybe Earth, too, if he really wanted to.
The green-eyed brunette was much more than that to Duo, though; the two shared a bed, although they'd never had sex. Trowa was still suffering from the after-affects of rape, and Duo loved him more than enough to wait, however impatiently.
And there sat Duo, cleaning his room, the closest thing to ordinary in the whole damn house. It made absolutely no sense.
Duo, tell Death to tell Sissa to put some clothes on. Trowa's voice said, echoing the same vibrant green as his eyes in Duo's mind. We've got company.
Who? Duo asked curiously, seeing if he could shove one last pair of wrinkled jeans into the basket of dirty clothes without breaking anything.
You'll have to see this for yourself to believe it. Trowa answered cryptically. Bring down that load and say hello.
Duo sighed, but didn't press the issue. That was all he would get, and he knew it. So, basket of dirty laundry in hand, he descended the stairs to see who had come to call.
Death, tell Sissa to cover herself.
Done and done. You have got to see who just walked into our living room!
So I've been told.
Feeling just a bit left out, Duo deposited his burden by the washer and headed towards the living room.
Any indignation that had built up vanished under a wave of shock when Duo found himself staring in disbelief at the last two people he would have ever expected to see in his house.
"I apologize again for dropping in so unexpectedly." Joshua Stone said, shrugging out of his suit jacket. "I hope this isn't too much of a bother."
"Not at all, Mr. Stone," Death said with a wide smile, taking Joshua's jacket from him and motioning for him to sit. "We were just cleaning house, and anything's a welcome break from that. Duo, don't just stand there with your mouth hanging open; come greet our guests!"
"Um…. hi?" Duo managed, much to Death's amusement.
"Okay, go get drinks. I'll have my usual."
"Do I want to order that, too?" Chang Wufei asked.
"Depends on how you feel about suicide drinks." Duo countered, finally composing himself. "Her 'usual' is half a glass of Dr. Pepper, some vodka, a bit of orange soda, and diet Coke, topped off with a spoonful of salt."
"I'll have water." Wufei decided quickly.
"Smart man," Death commented, shooing Duo towards the kitchen.
"Surprised?" Trowa asked with a smile when Duo entered the kitchen.
"Something like that," Duo agreed. "What are they, of all people, doing here?"
"I don't know." Trowa admitted with a shrug. "They haven't quite gotten past apologizing for not calling first yet."
"People do that a lot." Duo noted, hunting up a bottle of vodka. "If they're so embarrassed about showing up without calling, they should call first and save everyone some trouble."
"Most people don't think of calling until they're almost there." Trowa said, shrugging. "Sissa, dress yourself modestly and take the drinks out, please. And remember not to speak except in your own language, okay?"
"I hear thee," Sissa sighed. She concentrated for a moment, calling up the illusion of a thin, well-endowed woman with long, dark hair, bronze skin, and coal black eyes. "Worry thyself not; I can behave." With a swish of her very short skirt and a flirty wink, the succubus sauntered out of the kitchen.
"I don't know about you, but sometimes, I want to take that demon over my knee and spank her."
"She might enjoy that, you know." Trowa warned, smiling. "Let's go see why the man who tried to put you in jail stopped by to chat."
"I must admit, Mr. Stone, this is fairly unusual." Death said, sipping her drink under Wufei's slightly horrified gaze. "It's not often I whomp someone in court, then have them drop by for a drink."
"It's not common practice for us white-lighters to fraternize with evil defense attorneys." Stone admitted. "But I have something in the nature of a favor to ask."
"Oh?"
"My young friend here is Chang Wufei. He has something of an interest in a career as a lawyer. He wants to get in on my side of the line, but we both agree it would be best for him to explore every branch of law he can."
"Well, of course," Death snorted. "I myself actually worked in the DA's office for a short period of time before I hit it big in the defense racket. I take it you want me to show the boy what a case looks like from the other side of the courtroom?"
"Exactly."
"I have nothing big on the stove right now – Sissa, dear, another drink, please – so I can see my way clear to that, as long as there's no babysitting involved."
Sissa spoke up in the liquid language of her tribe, noting that Joshua had absolutely no ulterior motive, and that Wufei seemed genuinely eager for the opportunity.
"Yes, thank you, Sissa."
"What did she say?" Wufei asked curiously.
"She offered to take Duo shopping for me so I can get to work on educating you." Death explained with the ease of a practiced liar. "Sissa understands English perfectly fine; she just has trouble speaking it. The syntax confuses her somewhat, I think." She smiled fondly at Sissa as the succubus collected empty glasses and headed back to the kitchen for refills. "Language barrier aside, we get along fine."
Joshua coughed politely, and Death gave herself a mental shake. Now was not the time to be daydreaming, especially about Sissa.
"Now, Chang Wufei, which do I call you?"
"Wufei," Duo spoke up. "He's Chinese."
"Wow, Wufei," She said sarcastically, glaring sideways at Duo, "You sound an awful lot like Duo. Isn't that amazing?"
Trowa silently excused himself, probably to go laugh his ass off in the laundry room, and Duo at least had the decency to blush a bit.
"Well, Wufei, where should we start?"
Yes, short, I know. Please don't hate me.
I am holding chapter two ransom- five reviews, or the story stops here.
Yes, I am teh ebil.