Learning to Fly AN: First of all, I want to thank you and bow down to you. YOU chose my story to read, and I am 100% thankful for you and you alone. Also, No; I do not own Twilight. I don't own any characters, only the personalities I choose to give them. "Supposed To Be" Jack Johnson
Secondly, My favorite characters are Alice and Jasper. They are the most relatable. (But I don't really enjoy writing fics for them)
Thirdly, I have an enormous amount of Texas pride. It must be why I love Jasper; I have lived in a small town in Texas my whole life. I've seen Jackson Rathbone's band when they came to town. I do love them for them, not because he is in the band.
Fourthly, I love you guys but I don't write for you; not for fame, not for recognition, not for anyone else other then my own imagination.
I hope you read with open minds. I hope you love this story and if you don't then I am sorry, but I'm going to keep on swimming. Just keep swimming.
Read On.
Maybe it's up with the stars
Maybe it's under the sea
Maybe it's not very far
Maybe this is how it's supposed to be
This is how it's supposed to be
Maybe it's trapped in a jar
Something we've already seen
Maybe it's nowhere at all
Maybe this is how it's supposed to be
This is how it's supposed to be
Looking forward as we rewind
Looking back is a trap sometimes
Being here is so easy to do
If you want to
;-;-;-;-;-;
Ch 1. Falling Slowly.
May 5th…
One day; I will figure out who I am supposed to be.
And one day; I will find some one to stand by me.
I don't know where I am going, who I am, what I am doing or if I am doing anything right. I am 22 years old, I live with my Father and the only thing that keeps me hanging on is that feeling, deep within my heart that he is out there. My one, the man who sets my soul on fire, challenges me to be great, and is always there by my side, holding my hand. I've done my share of mistakes, made my own bad choices, and when I find him, He will erase it all. I will have made my life complete by getting someone I only dreamed existed. For now, I have to focus on work and the few online classes I have been taking. I haven't hung out with my friends lately; Alice thinks I am depressed. The truth is, that I just don't feel very sociable. I don't feel like very good company. Like I'd bring the group down. I wouldn't say I am particularly unhappy with life; more so just hibernating and keeping myself sane. When I go out with my friends, I see what I am missing out on. Every stage of it. Rose and Emmett are starting their family now, while Jasper and Alice are planning a wedding. I simply just can not relate to them right now. I miss my friends but they are progressing in life, and I'm still in the same place I was after we all graduated high school 4 years ago. I always thought I would be settled down by this point in my life; now the idea sort of scares me. I've been myself with out a man by my side my whole life… Adding someone else would just stir things up at this point. I want it to happen, but I am so friggen flawed right now... I want to be perfect for him. I am Isabella Swan, and I hardly know my self… I am 22...
Right now, I wished so much that I could be farther a long. At least living in my own apartment.. However, reality didn't have the same ideas as me. I live with my dad and have never lived on my own. I couldn't afford it, even with a roommate. I bought a brand new car right out of high school; at the time I could afford it. It was also a comfort buy after my ex boyfriend broke my heart. Now, I am in debt because of school loans. Charlie could only afford one semester due to him loosing his job as Forks Chief Police officer. They couldn't pay him anymore, he was getting too expensive. So at the moment Charlie was working at Newton's Adventurous Outdoors Outfitters; with my worst ex boyfriend, Mike Newton. Mike was my high school boyfriend. We were never too serious… even though he always tried to make it a serious relationship. I just went out with him because he asked and stayed with him be cause it was convenient.
Charlie would come home from work and have stories like "Mike asked me how you were doing today…" Or "Mike says he is still interested."
Charlie never liked Mike, but I think that he wanted to see me with someone at this point. I've stayed single for the last year.
Jacob was a family friend; our dads have been best friends for years. Jake was a few years younger, so when I can home after my sophomore year in college he had kinda filled out. Jake and I have always had a little flirty relationship going. One summer Jake won me over, but it wasn't enough. I didn't feel like it was ever right with him. I lost my virginity to Jake, and I don't regret it, because I felt like Jake held a special place in my life, as swell as the fact that I learned a lot from that. Sometimes I wish I saved it for the one man who will mean the most to me one day. I'm sure he will understand though… I hope he will understand.
I may not live in an apartment, but I still tried to pay my dues to Charlie… Sometimes he didn't know about it, and most of the time he refused. I had control of his bank account though; so I would slip rent into the account and he was oblivious.
My friends are a tangled web. Jasper and Rosalie were twins, while Alice was my best friend. She was engaged to Jasper. Emmett, my cousin ended up married to Rosalie. Alice and Jazz have been Together since high school. We all knew they would last. Rose and Emmett met at my graduation when my family came to visit. The gang has been 'the gang' ever since. I was okay with it all, on occasion I felt like the 5th wheel, but my friends where worth it. I was close to every one of them, and they were all close with each other.
Alice was this cute little bubbly black haired skinny girl reaching no taller then 5'1. She never met a stranger, and never had someone who hated her. She was kind, understanding, very friendly and extremely loving. She had one of the biggest hearts I have ever seen in someone.
Rosalie was a loving person as well, but she was guarded and cautious. Her past wasn't the best, but she always made the best decisions for her life. Rosalie's parents struggled with drugs and alcohol for the longest time after their divorce. In turn Rosalie suffered great commitment issues. However, she was introduced to Emmett. Emmett worshiped the ground Rosalie walked on the minute he saw her.
Emmett was rowdy, loud, hilarious and protective. He was like a big brother to me and with how close we all have been he and Jazz became best friends. Jasper was a little more held back and quite. He was smart, respectable and as Alice would say 'He is a panty-dropping southern gentleman'.
Every once and a while they would set me up on dates… I always bailed or talked my self out of the situation. I know my self, and I always had this gut feeling in the bottom of my stomach that these guys where never right for me. The gang trusted my judgment, but always still tried to help. I appreciated their help, but I remained confident and independent. It took me a bit to get to this point. I had my share of disastrous relationships; two very major ones in fact. There was James, hansom and a lady charmer. He was smooth, eloquent and out for one thing. That relationship was damaging from day one. I ignored and pushed away everyone in my life. Alice, Rose, My father and even my Mother. I didn't talk to anyone because I was not proud of myself. It took me a lot to get over who I became when I was with James. He destroyed the me I was familiar with. James was the ex that broke my heart, and in turn I bought the car that is causing me debt. What a fucking web I weaved myself.
The next relationship was… slightly healthier. At first it was never about sex, we fell in 'love' or at least we thought so. Carson was good to me for a good year. He made promises of marriage and a long ass life together. Carson told me to plan out wedding and knew the exact day he would propose. The one day Carson thought to him self 'I am too young for this, I don't want to be married.' And he left my life. Or at least he tried to… Carson came crawling back a mere 2 days later begging for me. He said he made a huge mistake. I took him back only to realize 3 months later that we were nothing but sex buddies at this point. I kicked Carson to the curb. We remained friends, and soon after we broke up he found a girl that his world revolved around. I was only a little bitter, but he was happy so I couldn't be too angry.
So now, I am left dating and not understanding who, or what I want. But I am okay with it; being single that is. My life is not really progressing, bringing a man at this point to my parent's house is awkward and I am still figuring myself out. I need to get my shit straight before I feel I am ready to be loved.
I really couldn't complain though, I had some amazing people in my life and I knew with out a doubt they loved me for me. One of these amazing people was throwing a little simple party at her house tonight. Alice, the energetic sociable pixie had lured me into her party. I enjoy parties for the most part, I am just quite and awkward so I feel weird when I go. But after a few hours and a few drinks I always end up loosing my awkward side.
Philosophy by Ben Folds Five pulled me from my very deep thought process.
Alice was calling.
"Yes mam?" I answered.
"Bella Marie, you had better be ready soon. You are ignoring my texts but Rose and I are picking you up in a few minutes for a girly spa day before the soiree tonight." Alice's bell like voice scolded me over the cell phone speaker.
"Alice.." I started to chide.
I loath the spa, I don't get pampered. I don't like other people touching me. Every once in a while Alice would use her charm on me and convince me that I should go.
This was one of those times.
"Isabella, I will not have you denying me of girl time. You will go and damn it you will enjoy your time. I can't let my best friend sit at home all fucking week. You are coming out or I am making Charlie kick your ass out."
Alice had a way with words.
Alice also had a way with Charlie… as in Charlie was wrapped around her delicately manicured pinky.
"Alright I'll go without major complaints. What should I wear; oh wise one." I mocked Alice and her bossy tendencies.
"Oh sweetie, that patterned tank top with purple and brown with a lovely pair of low rise skinny jeans with a pair of simple flats."Alice knew my closet front words... and back.
"What? You are letting me wear jeans to a party?" I gasped.
Alice laughed a little too loudly for my liking. "For the party I have a dress already picked out for you."
"And here I thought I was lucky." I chuckled, knowing all to well I would never get out of wearing a dress to one of Alice's parties. "I'll see you in a few crazy lady."
"Toodles, my love." Alice chimed.
I chuckled as I hit the end button. I walked into my closet and pulled out all the items Alice suggested for me. I decided I felt like gray acid wash jeans vs. regular blue jeans. I threw the clothes on and tied my hair into a loose bun. I had no need for make-up because it was going to be cleaned off any ways. I appraised myself in the mirror; I looked good and comfortable. I enjoy comfortable.
Not soon after getting dressed a tiny short haired pixie lady walked in wearing big white rimmed sun glasses accompanied by a tall blonde lady wearing slick red sunglasses.
"Bella dear, are you ready." Rose tipped her sunglasses to the edge of her nose at looked at me through the top of them.
"As I'll ever be, Rosie." I stuck my tongue out at her.
"Oh my God, Bella!" Alice chirped. "You are a fucking drama queen."
Alive grabbed me by the arm and pulled me out of the room, down the stairs and out the front door; barely allowing me to wave Charlie goodbye. We all hopped into Alice's creamy yellow porche. Did I mention Alice was banking? I was lucky enough to have big red, my red (almost orange due to fading color) rusty old ass monster of a truck.
Alice sped down the windy small roads of forks to the largest spa in a 4hr radius. She slid into a parking spot rather smoothly. The three of us stepped out; Rose had to let me out due to the two doors of the fancy little fast car. I have been to this place before but I was still apprehensive about going.
We walked through the double floor to ceiling glass doors as young dark haired girl greeted us. "welcome to Béatitude. My name is Jessie; sign in here please." The girl spoke in a bubbly tone as she pointed to a pink sheet of paper.
Alice and Rose strode over to the paper eloquently signing their names. As I went to follow suit a gentle tanned hand stopped me. "Don't worry Bell's we got you signed in already. " Rose gave her gentle tight lip smile.
I attempted to subtly roll my eyes but it was not missed by Alice. "Oh Bella, get over it. We love you, we take care of you. It is honestly simple."
"Blah blah blah. Mush mush." I wafted my hand in the air as I mocked Alice. This was a bad idea due to the death glare I was receiving.
"Bella, I love you and always will but sometimes you are a giant pain in my ass." Alice huffed.
I chuckled knowing I only give Alice a hard time to get under her skin.
I was forced into the changing room. I was massaged, and felt violated. I also got a manicure, pedicure, and a new hair cut. My mahogany hair stayed the same length but had some crazy layers in it now, this was Alice's idea. She said it would be easy to style straight or curly. I trusted her enough to go with it. It was fun and as she said looked easy. We finished up at the salon, we got the works plus some done. They even did my make up, although I refused they were persistent. I gave them guidelines trying to keep it fairly simple and keep it me. I was forced to change into the dress Alice brought for me. It was pretty, triangular shaped bust, thin straps, empire waistline and a glorious royal blue color. Alice and Rose look perfect, as always.
Alice was in a strapless black dress that was a vintage style. It hung around the body delicately. Rosalie was dressed in a form fitting solid red dress, with quarter length sleeved. It was modest and stunning.
"Oh Bella, you look so delicious!" Alice fluffed my hair after walking up to me and engulfing me in a hug.
"Thank you Al. You and Rosie look pretty and stunning, but what is new?" I laughed.
They gave me their thanks as we exited the hell house. The receptionist, Jessie failed to say good by because she was focused on applying her mascara while leaving her mouth wide open. We piled into Alice's tiny yellow Porche as she sped her way to her pretty little home. Alice chatted Rose and I up, informing us that a few people were coming. Angela from our date night diner was invited. She was a quite girl, but very sweet and she was right about the same age as us all. A few of Alice's employee's from the boutique and Rose's employee's from the law-firm she established. Jasper invited his best friend who lives in Chicago, they have been best friends since 5th grade. Just about as long as Alice, Rose and myself. There were a few other people, but no more then 20 at her house.
Jasper and Rose had different dad's and grew up apart. Jasper grew up in chicago, while Rosalie grew up in forks.
On our way to her house we blasted our usual girly driving music; N*sync, Spice Girls, and Hanson. I think we all had a special play list on our Ipod of these bands for when we got together. It was silly, but very nostalgic of our childhood where we grew up together. And each time we are always impressed that we still know all the words. We pulled up to Alice's giant 2 story home and piled out of her little car. People had already arrived and the smell of Emmett's grilling filled my lungs.
"Alice, what is Em cooking?" I sighed delightfully as I subconsciously rubbed my belly. If there was one thing the Swan's were known for, it was cooking.
"He has been here since 10am Bells," Rose sighed. "...He is smoking brisket."
"Oh Hell yes." I fist pumped the air.
"Yeah, also Bella I had Jazz boil eggs and potatos for you, so you could make your infamous potato salad." Alice bit her lip and kinda twirled with her hands behind her back.
I'm guessing she was acting this way because she hadn't asked me to make it, but I really didn't care. "It cool Ally, I love cooking and don't mind at all." at my reaction to her news she sighed and visibly relaxed.
We entered the house through the cherry colored wood door, to a house filled with people chatting. I spotted Angela who was hanging around Jasper, probably one of the only people she knew here besides Emmett and the three of us.
"Angie, I love seeing you outside of work, you dress so adorable." I said as I was walking up to her. She was dressed in a tank top that had a little bit of a green paisley pattern with beading around the neck and straps along with shorts and Jesus sandals.
"Hey Bella," Angela got up to engulf me in a hug. "I'm so glad you guys finally got here, I was so bored and haven't had enough alcohol to meet new people." she laughed.
"I know what you mean girly." I chuckled as I grabbed a beer.
"I see how you are Bells, greet Ang before me and grab a beer before you great me?" Jasper grabbed at his heart feigning hurt.
"Oh God, how dare I do such a thing Jasper. I am SOOOO sorry." I laughed as I captured him into a tight hug. I kissed him on the cheek and ruffled his crazy blond curly hair.
Rose greeted her brother very similar to me, but they spoke in their special language. I ignored them to go find my blood relative. I slid open the french doors to their magnificently decorated patio to be hit with the sound of splashed from the pool as well as the intense smokey BBQ smell coming from the grill.
"Emmett Harrison Swan, get your burly ass over and hug me." I stomped my foot acting like I was mad.
Emmett turned his brown haired head and grinned at me with his signature smile. He bounced over to me in 3 giant steps. He picked me up and twirled me about 5 times forcing a squeal from me.
"Hey baby girl!" Emmett boomed. Baby is what he has called me for years, never minding the fact that I was 3 months older then him.
"Hey buddy, Its great to see you. But I have to go slave away in the kitchen." I rolled my eyes playfully.
"Okiedokie, see ya in a bit Bells. Oh! Make sure you take your shoes off" Emmett chuckled.
"You chauvinistic pig." I laughed as I opened the glass doors to the house.
I quickly got to work making the potato salad chopping up the egg, pickles, olives, onion, with potatoes and mustard and mixing it all together. If I were to boast about anything at all, this was it. I was a master at potato salad.
I felt a pair of arms wrap around me, "" Alice slurred out.
"Good God Ally, how much have you drank?" I noted her silly behaviour.
"I just had one margarita." Alice giggled.
"You are a damned light weight and I don't think that is ever going to change." I giggled.
"Fuuck you Bellsie. You are a damned light weight." Alice scoffed at me trying to put up a good argument.
"Alright Alice, lets get some food in you so you level out the alcohol in you."
"Okay!" Alice started giggling uncontrollably.
Jasper walked in and picked Alice up bridal style. "Goodness, you are trashed already?"
At that Alice just started cackling in a bell like manner.
"She's a goner for the night Jazz, keep an eye on her." I shook my head as I was adding the finishing touches to the potato salad just as Emmett came in with the delicious smelling brisket.
"Will do Bella." Jasper replied as he walked into the living room setting Alice down on the couch.
Just as Emmett and I set out the finishing touches to the presentation we high five'd and the door bell dings through the house. Jasper rushed to the door and gave a manly holler when he saw the person standing in the door frame.
"Alice, Emmett, and Bella. Come here and meet my best buddy Edward!" Jasper called out excitedly.
Emmett and I made our way to the door. Halfway there a stumbling Alice gripped onto me.
"Em, Bells and my Love Ally this is Edward." Jasper beamed.
I looked away from Alice with a smile plastered on my face only to be greatede with the most beautiful man that has ever walked this earth. Tall and slender, with muscles, bronze like hair and tipped off with entrancing emerald green eyes. Edward was a Greek God, sex on legs, a visual orgasm... whatever you want to call it.
"Helllllllllllllooooooooo Nurse" I muttered under my breath realizing all to late that I spoke aloud and loud enough for every one to turn their heads in my direction. Damn beer, I thought as I blushed.
Edward gave a deviously hansom crooked smile. After he greeted Emmett and Alice, Edward extended his God like hands towards me. All I could do was smile widely and take his hand in mine. I gasped when I felt a surge of energy between us as I touched his hand. I stood there just leaving my hand on his, staring into his deep green eyes.
This was going to be an interesting night.
AN: So, I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. It took me a while but I really love writing this one. I actually had to stop myself cause I just kept going, but this was the best spot to stop at. I will try to update soon, but I am busy lady to don't count on it. Haha! Also, the two relationships I described were both from personal experience. This is an ExB fan fic. Lemons most likely will appear later, but be ware: I plan on dragging out the getting together of the two. Yes, they end up together but I want to make you beg for it. Please review if you read, it would make my day.