Title: Kerosene
Author: Lexi Lou Who
Copywrighted Song: 'Kerosene' by Miranda Lambert
Summary: He's moving on from her, with a little help… 6 Months after 'Photo'
Warnings: Angst, Romance, Slash
Disclaimer: I don't own CSI or the lyrics to the song 'Kerosene' by Miranda Lambert.
A/N: Hey all! Lexi here! Well...This is the Songfic Verson..Let's hope this doesn't get deleted..Enjoy!
Note: I beta-edited this myself, so any mistakes you see are stuff that I missed.
Today would be the day. Today would be the day that he would finally get over her and finally move on to other people.
I'm waitin' on the sun to set cause yesterday ain't over yet
I started smoking cigarettes there's nothing else to do I guess
Dusty roads ain't made for walking, spinning tires ain't made for stoppin'
I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
With a sigh, Greg Sanders put the last box out of the 2 boxes that he filled full of her stuff into the trunk of the car and closed the door. They had been hanging around his apartment for 6 months since she left: Toiletries, clothes that she hadn't packed when she left, cards they exchanged, candles, and so on that she had left at his apartment, all packed into those 2 boxes. 3 years of memories packed into 2 boxes. As he headed over to the driver's side, he made sure that the large can was on the floor of the passenger side of the car before he started the car and drove out of the parking lot.
He was paying attention to the road, but his mind had wandered elsewhere as he drove out of the city and into the desert. He thought about why it had taken him so long to do this, why he had spent all that time moping and waiting for her to come back when he knew deep down that she would never come back. His mind also wandered to the person that he left sleeping in his bed alone. Greg sighed and knew he would have to explain himself when he came home after he was done.
After driving for 10 more minutes, deep in thought, he reached his destination: Somewhere deep in the desert, miles from civilization. He pulled the car over, shut it off and got out, looking around and smiled. Perfect. No one would see what he was going to do with the boxes he had brought. Just the way he wanted it.
I gave it everything I had and everything I got was bad
Life aint hard but it's too long to live it like some country song
Trade the truth in for a lie, cheating really ain't a crime
I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
It took him a while to find dry brush and make it stay within the large stone circle he had made and to take out the boxes that were crammed inside the messy trunk of his car. Finally, he was ready, ready to do what he had wanted to do for a long time. Smiling, Greg took the lid off the first box and dumped it all in the large circle, not caring what broke or chipped. It wouldn't matter after today.
After covering that with some spare dry brush, he took the lid off of the second box and dumped the contents in that box into the circle on top of the contents of the first box. He walked back over to the car and took out the can, taking it by the handle as he walked back over to the circle with all of her stuff in it. He opened the lid and was about to the deed when he noticed a picture that had fallen out of the circle and lay at his feet. Raising an eyebrow, he picked up the picture and looked at it.
It was a different picture of him and Sara at the office Christmas party, the year before she left him cold. They were smiling, she looked great and it made memories come flooding back to his brain. After staring at the picture for a moment and swam in the memories, he snapped back to reality and added the picture to the bottom of the pile. He took the can of Kerosene and raised it, smiling.
"Let's do this." He said to himself as he started to pour the flammable substance over the items in the campfire, moving around so that all of the items would be covered in Kerosene. Once he was satisfied, he put the cap back on the can and took out a matchbook, snapping a match off of it and taking a last look at the items before he lit the match and threw it into the campfire, watching the items burn, watching the photo burn to ashes.
Forget you high society, I'm soakin' it in Kerosene
Light 'em up and watch them burn; teach them what they need to learn HA!
Dirty hands aint made for shakin', aint a rule that aint worth breakin'
Well I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
An hour or so later, Greg was parked back at the parking lot of his apartment complex. He remained in the car, staring at the floor with his head on the steering wheel, drowning in the thoughts that plagued his head as he burned Sara's items and drove back to his apartment. They were so jumbled he couldn't even grasp on reality. He was lost in the past, lost in 'what ifs' and 'I should've done this….' But, he finally realized that deep down; they both knew it would never work out. Greg just never chose to believe his gut instinct and it had left him with a cold, numbing pain when he woke up and found her gone.
Finally, after 30 minutes, he got out of the car and locked it, walking up to his apartment and staring at the door before he got out the key and opened it, being welcomed by the wonderful smell of his Blue Hawaiian coffee brewing. The thing that brought him joy. He toed off his shoes and walked into the kitchen to be greeted by the sight of Nick Stokes, sitting at the table with his PJs still on, eating breakfast.
"Morning, G. Where'd you go this morning? I woke up and you were gone." Nick said, a hint of worry noticeable in his beautiful eyes and in his voice as he put the coffee cup down. Greg smiled softly and shook his head, taking a coffee cup from the cabinet and filled it with coffee.
Now I don't hate the one who left
You can't hate someone who's dead
He's out there holding on to someone, I'm holding up my smoking gun
I'll find somewhere to lay my blame the day she changes her last name
Well I'm giving up on love cause love's given up on me
"No. I had to take care of something." He said and immediately noticed relief on Nick's face. He sat down next to Nick and sighed, rubbing his eyes.
"Should I ask what you had to do?" Nick asked as he finished off his breakfast, a bagel, and stood, putting the empty plate in the dishwasher. Greg shook his head and took a long drink. The Texan smiled and walked over to Greg, walking over to Greg and wrapping his arms around him. "I love you." Nick muttered into his ear as he kissed Greg's cheek. Greg smiled and stood, putting the coffee cup down and allowed his lover to hug him fully.
"I love you too." Greg said and kissed Nick softly on the lips, a smile on his face and in his mind. He knew one thing for sure:
Well I'm giving up on love HEY
He would never trade this for anything.
Cause love's given up on me
A/N: Again, THESES LYRICS ARE NOT MINE! The lyrics to 'Kerosene' belong to Miranda Lambert.
Please R&R!