Why I Let You Go
By jelliclesoul635
Summary: A murder has been committed between Munkustrap and Demeter, but just who killed who, and was it murder at all?
Disclaimer: I do not own CATS.
A/N: So I had this on my computer for years apparently and had simply forgotten about it, 'til now of course! My guess is that it was written around the same time as "Missing You". Enjoy and don't forget to review!
I know in the morning they'll banish me for eternity, punishing me for this crime they call murder. They're wrong, though… they couldn't be more wrong if they chased their tails and called themselves Pollicles. I didn't murder you. Technically… perhaps technically it can be considered as murder, but I can't believe that. It would hurt too much if I did.
I freed you, my darling, in the truth of it all. I cut the ties that bound you to this life so you may fly and be free of your haunting nightmares and terrible memories. If anyone is to be blamed, it is that beast responsible for adorning you with such a wretched past. The damage was done; your wounds were raw and vulnerable to the world, and nobody could console you when you cried… not even me…
I loved you more than a being can be loved, and you knew that, didn't you? I know you did, why else would you have escaped from his clutches and come to find me? Everlasting Cat, how you begged for me to save you every time you looked at me with those desperate, agonized, tear-filled eyes! And now I have, I have finally been able to save you, help you, console you… free you…
I am aware that to take the life of another is forbidden and is not acceptable, but I did not take your life, I gave you the freedom to have a new one! I have said these things over and over in front of the tribe, but oh my dear, they do not comprehend my reasoning, they do not understand the brutality of the battle that you endured each time you closed your eyes and allowed the darkness to reveal his evil grin.
I understood that when I made the decision to be your savior I would be sacrificing everything, but I didn't give it a second thought. I knew what I had to do, no matter the consequences. Banishment is nothing for a reprimand, the most painful part of doing what I did is having now to live out the rest of my nine lives without you, and that Demeter, is the worst punishment there could ever be.
However, you are at peace now, you are happy, you are safe, and you are free, and in my opinion, that is all that matters. Let them banish me, for at least I'll have my dreams, and in my dreams is where you are. Though you did not physically ask for this event to take place, for me to rescue you, you are most welcome, and if I had the chance to do it again, to save you from the chaos and despair, I would, without a single shred of hesitation.
My sweet, precious, beautiful Demeter, I love you.