America smiled to himself in the mirror, giving a wink. "Well off to the best thing ever, spending an entire day staring at hot chicks! And the best part, I get paid!" Another year meant another Miss America pageant, and another day he could watch pretty girls flaunt their bodies around like show dogs. It was the only time really he could do that and not get called a pervert.
Entering from stage left he waved out to the roaring crowd, all these people! The spotlight hit him dead in the face, making him cover for the bright light. The announcer's voice boomed over the loudspeaker. "Good evening ladies and gentlemen welcome to the 2014 Miss America beauty pageant!" Taking his seat at the judges table America watched as a wave of people stood up and clapped.
"Now before we start." The clapping stopped as the announcer returned. "Let us all take a moment to remember the men and women who sacrificed for our freedom." An eerie silence filled the air, heads were bowed. The five minutes passed and everything turned happy and cheery again. "And here we go folks!" With that the curtain parted and it started.
Dresses blew, the air smelled of hair spray and competition. America was hoping, to himself, a cat fight would break out. Girl after girl the time flew by, and by the end it was a dead tie between all of them. America was stumped. Why did he have to choose just one? They were all so sexy, in fact he thought about just crowning them all Miss America. Then he started thinking; they might claw out his pretty blue eyes in anger. Nope, he wasn't letting that happen. The announcer yelled with excitement and anxiousness. "Time to crown the winner!"
With his pencil in hand America marked down the name on paper. He got up and nervously handed it to the announcer. "And the winner of the 2014 Miss America pageant is….. Miss New York!" There were gasps, another year? America shook his head and smiled to Miss New York, walking onto the stage to hand her the sash and flowers. "Congratulations." He placed the sash over her shoulder, the crown on her head and handed her the flowers.
She smiled back, tears filling her eyes. "Thank you! Thank you all! This is such an honor!" Taking a bow she was escorted off the stage by America himself. He tilts his head, giving her a wink. "Now babe how's about you and I got out for dinner like I asked last time? I'm thinking McDonalds…" The next think he knew was waking up in the hospital, with a black eye and a head ache. Flipping the channels he comes across the news. Flirting Fail Lands Miss America Pageant Judge Into Hospital.
"Nice job, walked into a wall…great. Just Great." He flipped the TV off and looked up at the ceiling, then to the nightstand on his right. A note? It read Call me sometime when you get out of the hospital. I'll take you up on that dinner offer. ~ Miss America He smiled to himself, maybe he didn't ruin his chances too much. Better heal up soon America, the Misses awaits.