Disclaimer: Warning: DH SPOILERS!! This story is horribly AU, but hey, it is possible, and this was conceived by twisting the creation that J.K. Rowling created. I also added a few things and characters initially developed by Top Cow's The Darkness. And I have always loved watching the show Will and Grace so as a treat I may add some characters and jokes from it just to put in humour.
1. Return to the Darkness
"Look..at..me," Snape rasped clutching Harry Potter's robes, before his sight faded to black.
And that was the first time I died.
Hermione looked at Snape's body feeling something strange and unsure before she made her way to the tunnel trying hard not to let tears shed from her eyes.
Your time has not come
Life is a lie, my blood runs through you
Darkness rises within you as our soul is mine
Love dies forever
You are the Darkness…..
**************************************************
Hermione Granger-Weasley entered the Three Broomsticks waving immediately at Ginny and little Lily, "Hey guys, how are you doing these days?"
Ginny beamed, "There you are! I've been meaning to speak with you for ages." She motioned to a table helping Lily into a seat. "I haven't seen you since the divorce, sorry to ask but how did it go?"
"Ginny, you know I love your family with all my heart, but what he did to me was just utterly appalling. I feel ashamed for ever marrying your brother." Hermione did her best to keep calm and tried not to upset Lily.
"I know, Mum and Dad are furious with him, as I am." Lily tugged on Ginny's sleeve, "Mummy, are you talking about Uncle Ron?"
"Shh, sweety, this is just between Aunty 'Mione and me, okay?" Ginny soothed. "So how was the split?"
Hermione's jaw clenched at the memory, "He got full custody of the kids and I'm only allowed to see them four times a month until further notice. I got the house, but he still has one third of our assets."
"But he cheated on you!" Ginny cried in disbelief. "I…I just don't believe it."
"My life's gone downhill, but at least I still have my job," Hermione grumbled as the tea appeared.
"How does the job go?"
"It's awful," Hermione breathed out as Ginny nodded knowingly pouring the tea. "The Ministry has me up to my neck with complaints about Auror abuse, and it's not even my department. Luckily I'm getting an assistant tomorrow."
"Hermione," Ginny placed a comforting hand on hers, "think of this as time to wipe away the dirt and grime, and start a new life."
Ginny's words did seem to make sense. Maybe it was time to start over. Trash everything that reminded her of Ron and find something or someone else to occupy her mind. "Thanks Ginny, you have no idea how much I appreciate your support."
"That's what girlfriends are for, right?"
*******************************************************
2. Assistants and Queens
Even nineteen years after the final fall of Voldemort the Ministry was still hanging on by the threads. The new Minister of Magic, Fielding Conway, was in polite terms a scumbag. He formerly was the Chief of the Aurory, and was possibly the main reason why most Aurors with the exception of Harry were so corrupt. Hermione herself was the head Investigator for the Department of Mysteries, working on odd cases in which strange things are reported (strange for the Wizarding world). For some reason she got stuck with reports about those scumbags.
Hermione was sorting through her files when the department secretary's voice came over the intercom.
"Miss Granger, your assistant is here to see you."
"Thank you, send him in," not five seconds later, her office door opened and a woman's unnatural, ridiculously high-pitched voice called back to the secretary, "Honey, those robes hurt like a hangover."
In came a short, buxom, classy woman with dark hair entered, wearing fancy fur robes. Turning to Hermione she bore on a scarily cheerful smile. She didn't look like an assistant at all but… "Oh hello, Honey, the name's Karen Walker. You wanted an assistant, well here I am, fabulous, and looking for the mini bar."
It was then that Hermione noticed that Karen was holding a scotch drink in her hand. Who was this woman? The name sounded familiar and she had an American accent, despite her odd voice. "Well..Karen..I'm Hermione Granger. It's a pleasure to meet you…" Hermione held out her hand to shake Karen's who responded with the same smile "Honey, I don't shake hands."
Feeling confused and worried, Hermione showed Karen her desk and went over regular duties with her but to little avail, as she kept on filing her nails. At least she will file something…
Hermione was ready to ask Karen to leave and ask if there was some sort of mistake but thought better of it. At least she could give Karen a chance.
"Honey, what's with you? What's going on? What's happening? What's with the get up?" Karen eyed her semi-frumpy attire.
"Uhmm, you wouldn't know this but I just recently went through a messy divorce."
"Oh, Hermione…" Karen paused, "My husband bought this pearl necklace in Bora Bora." She lifted her cleavage to give Hermione ample view of said necklace.
"What does that have to do with my divorce?"
Karen stared questioningly at her, "Nothing, I just thought we were just swapping stories."
Hermione rubbed her temples. Oh, this was a great start of her new life.
----------
Hermione met up with Harry for lunch the next day. She was surprised to hear that Harry's department got a new page.
"Is that so, well my new assistant started yesterday," she answered mournfully.
"Not good, eh?" Harry grinned. "If it will make you feel any better, the new page, Jack, I think his name is, he's a right flamer, he is. I didn't even need to ask him at all, as soon as entered the door, I just knew it."
"Why would you make an assumption like that?" Hermione scolded. Some things never change. Harry had always been quick to assume things without sufficient analysis. Hermione had long since tried her best teach Harry to stop jumping to conclusions.
He swallowed his Firewhiskey with a smile, "Trust me, you'd think the same thing if you saw him."
"Then you probably do not want to know what I thought of you and Ron when I first met you two."
Harry glared at her, "We were 11!"
Hermione stifled a giggle and he continued, "I don't think we were even mature enough to know what gay means." She laughed softly and he took another sip of his drink, "So anyway, who is this lovely assistant of yours?"
"She goes by the name of Karen Walker-"
"Walker?" Harry's eyebrows shot up as the lightbulb in his head went on. "Did you say…Walker?"
She stared at him warily, "Yes. Why?"
"She must be the wife of Stanley Walker."
"Who's Stanley Walker?"
"Stan Walker is one of the richest wizards in the world. He bases himself in New York, U.S. of A. But he recently moved here to be near his gillyweed harvesters."
"If she's that rich, then why is she working for me?"
Harry shrugged, "I have no idea. But hey, are those documents coming along well?"
Hermione grumbled her displeasure, "I swear, if I could get my hands on the public counselman.."
Harry eased her down by pouring her a glass of Firewhisky, "It's not his fault. If it's anyone's fault it's Vincent Shrote's fault."
Of course there was Vincent Shrote. The Chief of the Aurory after his comrade Conway became the Minister, Shrote took the honor to continue on with tradition and kept the Aurory as corrupt as ever. His department was working side-by-side with the crime syndicates of Wizarding Europe so any crimes they commit were immediately covered up by Shrote's Aurors.
Two months ago, there was an explosion at an old wizarding poultry shop and the Aurors promptly explained that a stray ember from a fire likely caused it. Anyone who heard or read that report knew that couldn't be the case. There was no reason why a fire should be anywhere in a poultry shop where they are required to keep their food stored at a constant cold temperature. Add to the fact that several separate Aurors gave different stories also had sufficient cause for worry. But what the public didn't know wouldn't hurt them.
"Yes, well, he's the source of all of our problems," She mumbled bitterly. Harry shook his head, "Well, not all of our problems. I'm sorry with what happened. I hadn't realized he took the kids too." Of course, he had to mention her divorce, and her kids. Gods she missed her kids and wanted to see them so bad, but she just couldn't bear to be in contact with Ron at the moment.
"Thanks, Harry, but I think it's time I start anew."
He could only laugh, "Now, that's the Hermione I know!"
A/N: Karen, Stan, and Jack are from Will and Grace, ahh, good times. Vincent Shrote's last name comes from the character in The Darkness game (developed by 2K Games) Eddie Shrote. Same concept too. Both dips**ts abuse their authority in both the game and in my story.