Marty's Bad Day Part II: The Funeral

This is just a short quick story.
I told some of my ideas for Marty's continuing bad day (frankly I think she deserves a hell of a lot more than just another day after the pain she has inflicted on all of us!) and they said I should continue it.
I will warn you though for those that do not know me, my mind is a dark and dangerous place and I used it a great deal while coming up with "mishap's" for Marty! LMAO

This is dedicated to all my Jolie bud's!! I could never have made it through this mess without you!!
And to all the Jolie fans!!! You deserve this and a medal!!

Following Marty's Death By Chicken Bone (not as enjoyable as Death By Chocolate! LOL) I felt we all needed to pay our respects to her so here it is.
Respect...Hmmmmmm and if you believe that I've a got a bridge to sell you! LMBO
So let the fun begin and I hope it makes you laugh or at the least smile.
I did both while writing it!

Chapter 1

So Marty Saybrooke was dead.
The town grieved and flags were lowered to half mast as the residence of Llanview remembered a great amazing woman.

Uhhhhhhh... NOT!

In fact it seemed amazingly that life went on.
And quite well in fact.
But Marty was still having a bad day.

First off the doctors and nurses, after discovering Marty had died (from choking on a chicken bone!) they left her lying there with the chicken bone visibly stuck in her throat.
The local funeral home was called and were requested to come and pick her up.
After a couple of hours, the mortician did have to finish his dinner after all, he arrived to transport her to their facility.
She was loaded with a flip and a flop onto the gurney to be taken away by the funeral director, Hubert.

On the way out of the hospital Hubert chatted with those that he met and knew, and even a few he didn't.
He had just pushed the gurney into the hospital elevator when he said to a passing couple:
"I wouldn't have the chicken if I were you, unless you want to end up like the shrink here. A real shame too cause usually its pretty good, not dry and tasteless. Huh, would never have guessed it would end up killing someone."
The poor couple looked at him then the sheet draped body as the elevator doors closed with Hubert still standing in the hallway.

"Oh crap." Sigh. "Well, I'll catch her on her way back down, she has to come down sometime right?"
Hubert looked at the couple as they quickly turned and made tracks in the opposite direction.

The elevator went all the way to the roof and just as the doors opened a sudden and extremely strong gust of wind sucked Marty and her gurney out of the elevator. As the gurney rolled along towards the edge of the roof it began to pick up speed until it was almost flying along.

And then suddenly it was!

Flying that is! Over the railing and off the roof!!!

People outside the hospital entrance looked up and watched in curiosity as something came careening down.

Is it a bird?

Is it a plane?

Oh crap!!! Is it a chicken?!!!

As Marty and her runaway gurney made their way back to earth there seemed to be only one couple who did not see what was headed in their direction.
And by the time they did it was too late.
Marty and her bed of speed had touched down and flattened the unsuspecting man and woman.
It was later discovered that their names were Frank and Dena. Hmmmmmm, maybe they had bad karma?

As the crash was heard inside the hospital and staff ran to witness the aftermath, Hubert made his way out and could be heard saying,
"See I told you. What goes up always comes down. Not always as dramatically but it does come down."

Sigh

After picking up the pieces of said gurney and Marty too, he load all into the back of his van and was about to make his way to the funeral home, thankful that his job for the night was done and he could go home and watch that documentary on field mice and their life cycle, but fate had another idea.
Just as Hubert started the van a sudden and loud backfire was heard and the engine died.

Sigh, it really just wasn't his day!
After calling the local towing company and arranging for a truck to come, Hubert stood by the van waiting.

"You know Dr. Saybrooke if I didn't have bad luck, I'd have no luck at all."

Sigh.

"You just don't know what it's like to always have bad things happen to you."

After a 30 minute wait the tow truck arrived, hooked up to the van and towed it and Marty off to the funeral home.