It always seems to be around this time where my mind starts to wander...not necessarily on common thoughts...or strange thoughts. More like the subject of 'what if' and 'what would happen' and what not. It always made me giggle what ideas would just pop right into my little head. The only joy I seemed to respond to...until I stopped thinking on it...and felt a certain distance from the thoughts..
It really bites when I get that way.
One afternoon I had one of those moments where I just was urging to get out of the house for a stroll along my little suburbial town.With a skip in my step I was bobbing my head to the beats and rhythms that filled the recesses of my ears, flowing so smoothly. Looking about I decided to change my usual route to stop and take a seat in Huntamer Park to possibly catch some sun. Sun bathing always feels so nice, the heat just lightly tinging one's skin. I had found an empty bench, leaning back on my arms letting my head hang back, closing my eyes to take in the warmth of our giant star of the galaxy.
Although this didn't really last for too long. It was only moments after I heard a swoosh beside me, almost as if there was a sudden strong wind. I opened my eyes looking about..not seeing anything...not yet. Then I looked down.
Just to my left was what looked to be a somewhat tattered old book, binded together by leather strippings...with a faded celtic design upon it's cover. Seeming so aged...yet ageless. I couldn't take my eyes from it. Bending down I picked up the fragile book and looked about wondering if anyone had dropped it along their way...possibly explaining the sudden wind that I felt moments ago. I was unsure then...but what I was sure of is that I was going to be going home soon. An eerie feeling crept up on me that I didn't like well.
--
A little later in the evening after eating dinner I trotted to the back to my room to relax for a bit. This was also so I could take a better look into the book I had found at the park that was so abruptly dropped beside me. I sat upon my bed with my legs crossed, the sound of music flowing through the air softly from my radio, staring down at the book. I was hesitant to look inside for what reason I am rather unsure about...but my stomach erked at the thought.
Taking a big breath, I reached over grabbing the book and slowly opening the brittle pages to reveal what could be inside. Possibly someone's journal? Maybe something mystical? Who knows. All I know is when I opened it to look there was pretty much...nothing. Wow...this came as a suprise.
So many questions popped up in my mind as to why the hell it was empty. Most of the time when anyone found an old book like this there would be some inscriptions or writings, maybe even doodles inside. But I got the raw end of the deal I suppose. It didn't entirely seem like a disappointment..seeing as how now I had a nifty old looking book I could use for one thing or another.
"It's too bad there wasn't anything in here that I could have read. But I guess I could use it for a journal or something." I looked at the pages speaking aloud to myself. I hopped off my bed to grab a pen to start out using this book as a possible journal to keep for myself. Hopping back up I began to write.
July 7 2008
Today I would have to say was okay. A little boring considering so much that I could do even right now. I guess that's just how my life goes. Better not just ramble off in this thing...what could I write? Perhaps wishes and dreams? Haha...I guess that's what it will be for now.
Sitting back for a moment I took the time to think of what to write. Maybe some jibber jabber of what I've always wished for, no matter what those wishes were. My pen once again stroked the age old paper.
I find it kind of funny how my mind wanders on certain things. That I wish things to happen like I was still a little kid. Although sometimes I find it would be amazing if, oh let's say, suddenly out of nowhere Solid Snake appeared at my house, then ended up staying here because he feels it's a "safe hideout from anyone trying to find him"...
I chuckled at the thought of what I just had written.
Even if I must face the fact that it most likely won't happen, I can always dream, right? I would love to see that happen. It'd be something new that went on around here, beside the usual...erm...stuff. Well my mind is kind of blank right now, so I may as well go to bed or nap or something. Though I almost hate having a queen sized bed, being that there is so much room. It's nice and all...but I wish I had someone to share it with. Ah well...good night old friend! I shall write in you again...sometime.
P.S. SNAKE IN MY BED WOULD BE GREAT. wink wink I'd be happy to share xD lol
I gave a yawn, giggling a little more at the thought of Snake using my bed. Or just randomly appearing there. Hell I'd probably be scared shitless, but who really cares. It's a kickass army man to snuggle. SERIOUSLY. I sat down the old celtic book on my desk, got up and changed very lazily and hopped right back into my bed after shutting off the light. My mind kept thinking back to the moment I found that book...but then I drifted off to sleep. Peaceful. Silent. Serene.
Or so I thought.
--
As night turned to day, the pace of time grew quick to prepare for a new day. I was sleeping soundly as I always do, never really affected by any light that trickles in through my laced curtains. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, aside from my moving a little here and there. I even stretched somewhat placing my leg more towards the edge...except something felt different. When I layed my leg back down, it fell upon something a little more harder than whatever was on my bed. Of course at this time it didn't really affect me, due to being half asleep anyway. I just layed there quietly as I was, coming in and out of REM sleep, but for some odd reason I kept feeling as though my bed was moving. Now considering that I'm not feeling awake, it could be due to my sleeping. But I couldn't shake the feeling.
Shaking myself a bit I slowly awoke to staring at the ceiling. By moving my right leg I knew my blankets were hardly on me, which usually I assume I must of kicked off during my sleep. Laying there for a few minutes, thinking, feeling, I then proceeded to try and fall back asleep as I turned to my left and flopped my arm in that general direction. This is where things got extremely odd. Yet again it feels as though there is something not so comfy on my bed. Slowly opening my eyes there was much a blur, but clearing my vision as much as I could I inspected what was beside me.
My eyes widened to find a much larger figure laying beside me, staring right back at me. A masculine figure in bulky clothing and what seemed to be some kind of gear. My mind finally kicked in as I slowly moved back from being so close. With a sudden leap I flopped out of bed in a different direction, rolling to the floor to grab my glasses for a better look at this stranger. He obviously sat up in response to my quick movement, watching my every move. Once I got my glasses on I would reach for the nearest blunt object to maim the holy hell out of this intruder.
Heh. Intruder indeed.
I was stuck, practically paralyzed staring back and the man sitting in my bed. Head and heart pounding with shock, I realised exactly who it was. Something must have really been screwy with that damn book I found.
"How...in the world...did thi-...how did you end up in my bedroom? In my bed no less??" Blurting out trying not to make a fool of myself just gawking at him. He cocked a brow.
"Why else would I be in here, I'm using this place as a hideout. I came here, then the next thing I know you're laying beside me." I huffed at his reply.
"Well for the record, this is my room, and not just some...hideout spot. I mean seriously this is just weird how you of all people to end up in here..." He snorted pulling out his knife to pick junk from out under his fingernails.
"So I'm guessing you know who I am, huh?" calmingly he said to me, with me just snorting at the obviousness of this whole conversation. "How could I not know about the insanely skilled soldier Solid Snake; I mean geez you'd have to be downright idiotic not to know of the ga-" I shut my mouth before I said anymore, seeing as how I'd rather not end up causing anymore possible damage than what has already been done. Snake just cocked his brow at me again wondering if I was just another nut case he'd run into.
I started to wonder if I was either dreaming or in some strange alternate universe where a hideout was my home. My god my head was boggled beyond control. This frustrated me, yet made me want to scream out of the fact that something LIKE THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. It just never seemed to stop nibbling at the back of my brain, the fact that anything like this had a possibility of happening. I guess I can blame the slow developement that I've had to live around for most of my life. Hell anything is possible...I just hadn't thought that book would make it possible.
I just stood up, took a breath, then looked back over at the infamous Solid Snake. Or...Big Boss...it was hard for me to recall. I believe it was more Big Boss, since he had a bit more camoflage than the elaborate outfit in the second game. ''Alright, fine. You are able to stay here as long as you don't make some stupid remarks, request any ridiculous amounts of questions, oh...and if anybody who also inhabits this place come along or ask anything-'' I paused getting closer to his face as he sat listening to me, questioning me with his expressions. ''Do not tackle, harm, shoot, or try to explain yourself in elaborate details. If you do, I will personally take you down myself. Plus they'd be confused anyway. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cook...because I am starving.'' With my last words, I walked out of my bedroom, book in hand, and towards the kitchen to make some potato salad.
The minutes went by as I started to work on dinner - if not for everyone, at least for myself- and thinking still about the mystic celtic designed book that had thrusted itself upon my person. Was there some purpose for this thing to be in existence, or was someone listening to my every thought and word...to bring forth and be so kindly to my dreams and wishes. I just sighed as I poked at the potatos in the pot, stepping to the side before a bit of bacon grease tried to make me it's victim once more. Taking a 180 degree turn I started to work on the onion for the potato salad. No matter how hard I try, no matter how much I force my face to keep still without breaking out into a chemical mishap, my damn eyes start to water. Curse you onion...curse you.
This is when I realised I wasn't the only one in the kitchen.
''So...what are you making anyway?'' I was asked by the bulky armed man, wondering if I should make a crack about his lack of wild life to snare and consume.
''Just some german potato salad. Rather good actually. Have you no more rations to eat?'' I quirked grinning dumping the onion pieces into the pan when I was done cooking the bacon. The smell was overwhelming. He just snorted at my remark.
''Well when would I get a second chance to have a nice warm meal? Not that I don't mind rations and the occasional snake or rabbit..'' I just chuckled rolling my eyes. You truly would eat anything wouldn't you Snake? I always found that funny, even if it was for survival. Once again human lifestyles have gotten the best of me.
I looked over at him. ''You can make yourself comfortable you know. It's not like someone is going to bombard us at any second.'' I assured him pointing towards the livingroom. I guess I spoke too soon when I heard the sound of the front door being messed with. Shit. Before I knew it Snake was plastered stiffly against the wall, waiting with gun cocked in hand ready to shoot whatever came through the door. Or at least alarm them.
I had the tongs clutched tightly in my hand, trying to keep my voice down. ''What the hell do you think you are doing?? Did you not listen to me earlier??'' Snake just looked over at me only with his eyes, hardly ever moving from his spot. ''One can never be too sure, who knows if the ones you stay with are even back from wherever they may have gone..'' My eyes just twitched.
As the door made it's soft skid across the floor, Katie and our mom came through the door calmly chit chatting about whatever came to mind along their return from the grocery store. Time was of the essence, and I had to do something quick before everything went all wrong. Or anything worse.
Yes Mary that is the most perfect idea imaginable. Let's just go with pure instinct.
As soon as I heard them begin to round the corner I had done the worst thing imaginable. I leapt a few feet in the air and clinged to that man like there was no tomorrow. This resulted in Snake trying to get up and yank me off of his head, which I proceeded to clench my hands into his hair with arms intwined around his head. Much noise occurred, causing us to fall backwards with a loud thump onto the linoleum floor. Wow did my back hurt or did my back hurt.
It hurt like a bitch. A bitch PMSing for MONTHS.
Once regaining the feeling in my body I looked towards the doorway to the kitchen. Katie and Mom were just standing there, baffled and shocked, at seeing the newcomer along with me toppled on the floor. I erked a bit from movement, but all was not well in my mind. I was wondering if this was going to lead to a misunderstanding that was going to be hard to explain, or if there was more to the shock that was brought to their faces. My mind told me to look down. As I did so Snake was laying practically on me, his head quivering in pain from the accidental fall. I just blinked, moving away as quick as I could.
''What in the hell...is going on here??'' My mom exclaimed still not able to take in what she just witnessed. I just looked at her with a blank face. This was going to be reaaally hard to explain.
So I just grinned and chuckled nervously. ''Eeehh...well I guess I'm sure you can see who this is. Let me introduce you guys...to erm. Well Snake.'' I really had no idea what to do at this point. I felt almost cornered, trapped into what has gone on ever since I wrote down those words. Wrote them in permanent scratched upon that books crinkled pages.
Snake just got up along with myself shaking himself off. The two of them were still gawking. This made me feel really uncomfortable. So I ushered him to speak up. And by usher I mean jabbing him in his side. He cleared his throat.
''Eherm...I am the soldier Solid Snake, and I have taken this area and housing as my choice to keep from being - '' I stopped him before he could continue. Mom and Katie grabbed me into the livingroom, huddling around me. Boy did I feel in trouble. My mom was the first to speak.
''Could you explain to me why a middle aged man is suddenly in our house alone with you?'' I just blinked, wondering if I should say something or not. I really didn't feel right at the time, let alone who knows if they would believe me or not. At this point they were still waiting for an answer to this mess, so I did the one thing I only knew to do. I slowly held up the book, the blasted book that is getting me in this and would hopefully get me out of it as well.
Once looking down at what was in my hand, my mother reached out towards it...but once she layed even a finger on it, she got a shocked like she was fooled into the trickery of the classic hand buzzer. Katie and I were ... suprised.
--
So after countless explanations and down right nonsensical things, we all came to an agreement to let Snake stay in my room for the time being. Where as I wouldn't trust him alone in there, so I voted that we take turns sleeping either on the floor or my bed. Frankly I knew how that was going to go...but it was inevitable. For the first night we were already arguing about who would sleep on the bed. Which I find this utterly amusing since Snake usually doesn't really care for much in a situation, and would take whatever he was given with. I guess his personality changed a bit ever since he had to deal with this stubborn eighteen year old woman. Ah well. So I decided since everyone else was asleep that I was for sure going to sleep on my bed, and if he really must, is allowed to sleep on it as well. As long as he didn't move too much I would be fine.
When we were getting ready to go to bed I just threw on some stuff in my mix match way so as to not have to deal with the embarassment of changing in front of a man. God sometimes I felt too modest for my own good. One we both got stripped to what we were going to sleep in, I hopped up on the bed first, ushering him that I was ready and that he was allowed to climb in. My god was there a difference in our weight, since I was practically almost rolling towards him. I wondered if it would have been better for me to sleep on the outside, rather than inside. Ah well...I had to deal with it one way or another. Supposing this is just going to be a first of a long chain of changes to our life, my life to be more precise.
It was just about half an hour that I was wondering if he was asleep or not. I was facing the wall not wanting to look since I would end up shitting myself to see those two eyes staring right back at me. Moving my head a bit and yawning I turned around bravely, keeping my eyes closed just in case he decided to not trust me for this evening. Once I got the chance I opened my eye slowly, noticing his were closed. Hrm...well this seems slightly odd...but then again he could easily be awake with his eyes closed. Listening. Ah hell I could just be a paranoid mess and not realize it. Course I do tend to get this way when my mind is going a thousand miles a minute. And with him here...well it ain't really helping me a whole lot either. For the life of me I could not stop fidgeting, whether it be my fingers or my feet slightly moving due to being uncomfortable. Turning around once more I gave a soft huff, just lower than audible to a human's ear...
But that didn't stop the sudden feeling like I had just sturred the slumbering beast.
''Unable to sleep, huh?'' Muttered softly from the slightly visible lips of the man now before me. I just sighed. ''I'm not having any trouble...'' He just gave out a soft chuckle.
''Well that must be a lie..since I can easily tell by your back muscles...that and the obvious little sounds you're making.'' I just grunted at his comment.
''For your information I tend to move alot prior to my actually falling asleep. It's my own fault for staying up until the early hours..'' I softly replied, not wanting to give off the feeling that I was annoyed. Believe me this was hard enough since he obviously locked in on my mood.
''You don't cover it up very good then. It seems as though something is bothering you.'' I had to admit, even though I really just wish I could conk out into deep sleep to get away from telling any truth about how I was feeling right now...on the other hand I really wanted to just cling to him, whether he liked it or not. Or if it even confused the man I didn't give a damn.
''Let's just say I'm not used to certain people sleeping in the same bed as me...'' I said with a huff, stuffing my face a little into the large pillow. Snake cocked a brow resting on an arm for a moment looking over at me. I would not let him see my face. If he even tried I would bite his hand or whatever to keep him away from me.
As I lay there I kept on concentrating to get myself to sleep faster, thinking of things that didn't keep my mind too awake. Okay...boring stuff...let's think of boring stuff. Studies...office work...mathmatics...ummm...
''Do you want to talk about it? You seem to be having a hard time getting to sleep...either that or you are a really troubled person...'' At the moment he said that, I could have sworn he saw my hair stand on end like a seriously pissed off feline. I sat up quickly looking at him. I was frustrated alright, and I was going to give him the brunt of it.
''I am not a troubled person - I am just having a hard time to fucking deal with what the hell is going on in my life. Having you here isn't necessarily helping. You just appear out of nowhere, causing me to have to explain myself when it's hard enough to do with hardly anyone being able to believe any words that you are saying1'' Keeping it as quiet as I could, I just huddled my face in my hands rubbing my temples. He just sat staring over at me...most likely not phased at all. I just hoped he didn't give some idiotic remark. I was going to start throwing punches at that point and put the man outside like a bad dog. But instead Snake lifted his arm and wrapped it around my shoulder. I had no idea what to think at this point. I was too dumbstruck to care.
''I understand what you're going through. I've gone through my own mess of shit on the many missions. Man you wouldn't know the half of it...''
Oh yes I would.
He continued on just lightly patting my shoulder. Am I the only one who could hear a loud throbbing in this room?
''But you just gotta get through whatever life throws at you, ya know? Those ridiculous little things that makes sense must have some kind of purpose, right? As annoying as they may seem...'' I just nodded relaxing a little bit.
''Snake...I never fully introduced myself. I'm Mary...and it shouldn't be too much of a problem for you staying here to...well...hideout.'' He just smiled a bit at my late but appropriate introduction. ''Well...it's nice to know the people that I'm hiding with, you can never be too sure who you're around.''
''Snake...if I may say one more thing..'' I uttered almost feeling embarrassed as to what I was about to say next.
''Hrmm? What would that be, Mary?'' Snake just looked down at me out of curiousity.
I cleared my throat. ''Would you mind if I snuggled you tonight?'' There was a slight silence, nearing awkward and yet not. He gave out a heartfelt chuckle. ''Sure. Whatever makes you not fidget like some drug addict.'' I just frowned smacking him in the arm afterwards getting comfortable so we could both get some well deserved rest.
--
Sleep has never been so bad to me since I started staying up really late. I was still of course laying in bed around...oh afternoon or so. How was I suppose to know I was still sleeping. It was only until I woke up that my bladder started to alert me more awake. Stupid bladder. I sat up, realising that Snake was not in his bed groove, so I slipped off my bed and headed towards the bathroom.
Crap. Someone is in there. Taking a goddamn shower. I really had no energy to knock so I went back to my room and was going to attempt to clean my mess of a room. So, half ass brushing my hair, I put it up in my hair clip and put on some music. I turned it to Mad Lion Shoot To Kill. I couldn't help but start singing with it shaking my body to the beat. Going about I was practically bounding and leaping along every inch of my room matching my movement to every beat. I'm just hilarious like that. Little did I know was that my door had been opened by Snake, now garbed in only a towel. I was of course not paying attention, since he just snickered to himself watching me dancing like a silly little retard to the music. I was just getting done with some small things, tossing clothes to the 'buh buh' sound the jamaican made to my hamper, turning myself about and now seeing what I had to face next.
This man...now I have seen him multiple times half naked in the game, and of course had to confess to the levels of great fitness this man was in. But seeing him, steaming and slightly damp from what must have been the shower from earlier, and only in a towel...I was about to die right on the spot. Stringy brown hair and those damn eyes staring right at the suprised look on my face. Oh lordy.
''Did I interrupt your dancing? If so I apologize.'' Snake was still smiling at this point. I however was not amused. I just hoped my nose wouldn't gush out due to nervousness and just seeing what cannot be unseen. ''Oh no no...I was just cleaning my room...but since you're out of the bathroom I've gotta use it so...later1'' Scurrying quickly out I skidded around the corner and slammed the door. Snake just shook his head laughing to himself, closing the door to get dressed and go out if he ever needed to.
I on the other hand after about half an hour came back out of the bathroom, heading down the hall. I was going to try and figure out what the hell I wanted to do today. I wasn't going to be the eternal babysitter of Snake, since I was sure he could take care of himself. He's a big boy. As long as he doesn't get into fights or shoot anybody...I'm sure everything would be alright. I grabbed a few things slipping on a jacket just in case the weather decided to hate me.
''I'm going to go for a walk, if Snake gives you any trouble...just call me.'' I said to my mom as I waved and headed out the door. This was hopefully my chance to get away without a certain someone asking me stupid questions. Well...I'm sure they weren't stupid..but...I didn't feel like dealing with it all right now. Walking calmly to the beat of my music that blasted through my earbuds, I took my time walking about the small area of stores. Some days I would go inside one or two and browse to see what new things they had, or just took the time to walk about getting some exercise as well. Afterwards I walked into Target and browsed around there as well. I adjusted my small bag wandering through the aisles looking at either the movies, series collections, or CD's. My thoughts had wandered to many a particular question and such when I looked at some animated things and some games over to the right of me. The thinking had stopped when my stomach decided to control what I wanted to do. Snorting I headed towards the small food court to grab something edible to shut it up.
Sitting amongst a chair that was closer to the exit of the store, I stuffed my face full of cheese covered pretzel looking at my journal. The one thing that I would most likely keep on my person 24/7. I dare not leave this anywhere. Seriously I've learned from watching all those shows and movies with the idiotic people who have great things...then fuck them up. Although as I was satisfying my stomach's urges for consuming something, I was a little sidetracked in what I was exactly writing in my journal.
July 8 2008
Another pretty uneventful day I suppose. I got out of the house at least, thankfully away from that which may have been the end of me. -sigh- I couldn't help but distract myself especially with what happened earlier. Ah well..I've got to get over it if I'm going to be living with that man now geez.
Right now my mind can't help but think of...certain things. Mostly what the hell I'm going to do when I get home. Maybe I'll dig up one of my games to play. Like Silent Hill or something. Or maybe I'll play some Soul Calibur, I haven't in a while. Sweet Jesus my mind won't stop going in circles...thinking. Stop brain, your DANGEROUS. Oi vey..maybe I'll play some older games or something.
Sighing deeply I slid off the stool seat I was sitting upon, dumping my garbage and heading out the door with my book in tow. I had not really felt the need to go home just yet, seeing as how it was another lovely sunny day. I always found it lucky to have such nice weather when one lives in wishy washy wet Washington. The wet part wasn't bad, but sometimes it had been so frequent it drove me bonkers. It wasn't all bad though. Taking my time to soak in the sun along my way home I had decided to stop at Huntamer Park once more. Noticing it was mostly empty I went over to a bench and sat for a short break. Gripping onto the book I looked about the sky letting my thoughts wander to whatever came to me. Blankness, my eyes watching the clouds as they floated on by fluffy as they had ever been. Letting my head fall down I opened the journal staring down at the inscripted words of dark ink, lying silently on the page.
For some strange reason I don't think that I was even aware of what I was doing at that point. Pen clasped in my hand, had begun to write small things, which was followed by doodles. Little sketches of people I knew well. People I often associated with myself due to my admiration of them.