Authors note: Thanks for giving this fic a chance and reading this far. Basically, I wanted to write a fic about the marauders and their love lives and i developed an idea that would encompass the last couple of years at Hogwarts, and the experiences they all had. The main focus is on Sirius Black, though there will be lots of the marauders in it. Smut and Fluff will be a big part of the fic, starting early on. Hence the M rating – it will be very graphic. Oh, and is extremely cannon – even to the dates of the full moons – one exception – Sirius is 15 when he runs away.

Disclaimer: If I was JK Rowling I wouldn't be writing on FanFiction; I'd be selling this and making millions. I own nothing. At all.

How Hard It Is

Chapter 1 – Thank You

Help. The one think that no one wants to admit needing, but usually the one thing that they need the most. That was true here, for the teenager that sat on the cold, hard pavement of a London street. He was a tall, dark haired, hansom boy in his middle teens, most of the boys his age would have been tucked up in bed, sound asleep. Not him. There was no way he was going back in that house. Not after what had happened.

What Sirius wanted, hell needed right now was help. It was gone two in the morning, on the third day of the summer holidays, and even then it was a cold night. He had walked out of his home with only the stuff that he could quickly pack back in his school trunk. He had no where to go, he started to panic as he sat there. He needed help. Unfortunately, thinking things through was not a great strength of this boy, as was getting stressed in a situation, and when that happened he couldn't think rationally. He had forgotten that he wasn't the same situation as every other boy his age. He was special; he was a wizard. Not that he could do any magic right now, not if he didn't want the Ministry after his blood too.

Picking up the end of his trunk he started off down the road, away from his parent house, away from the hell-whole that he had been forced to grow up in. As he walked the feeling of helplessness increased, and with it his anger. He was well known for having a short fuse when it came to his family. The street lamps around him flickered. I need to calm down, he though to himself, or I'll have the ministry on my back too. That was the down side of being an exceptionally powerful wizard when your emotions get the better of you. You do things. Things you don't mean to do. Still trying to calm down after what he had been through that night wasn't going to be easy, and he felt his anger peaking, as he thought of his family again. Fuck my family, fuck the ministry, let them come. And with that thought the lights around him blew in a spectacular show of sparks. The only light now came from the full moon.

The thought of the moon struck home and with it the solution of getting some help from his friends came to him. Remus would know what to do, he was good like that, but he couldn't go to him right now, it was his time of the month, a smile crept across his lips as he thought about the joke that he had made over four years ago. His thoughts turned to James, his other best friend. He marvelled that it had taken his so long to come up with the solution. James would be able to help him; he would know what to do. With his plan firmly set out in his head (at least for the night) he Black heir put out his wand hand and waited a moment for the customary bang that announced the arrival of the brilliantly purple, wizarding transport; the Knight Bus.

"Master Black, Sir. How good to see you looking so well, my regards to your family when you next see them. So where could we be taking you, Sir?" This was the flustered speech of the conductor of the Knight bus, a little old man that was positively terrified of the Black family. He had paled the instant he had seen the boy; one remembers one's manners when being spoken to by a Black. If you valued your life that was.

"Merlin Adam! Don't 'Sir' me. I'm not one of them, you can call me a prick if you really wanted to, I don't care. I'm a normal fifteen year old boy!"

"Sorry, Sir, but I learnt by experience not to cross your mother, back when I knew her."

"Yeah, well, that my mother, she always was a bit demented. So can I go to Godric's Hollow please?"

"No problem at all."

A few moments later the triple decked bus was hurtling down a county lane at an incredible speed. The second smile of the evening appeared on Sirius's lips. It was the road to the village his best friend lived. Next thing he knew he was practically thrown off his feet as the bus stopped. He dragged his trunk off the bus, a loud clunk echoing in the square in which his friend lived. He looked up at the houses surrounding him; if you could call them houses… they were huge. The people who loved here had money and lots of it too. Each one of the houses was detached, with large gardens to the front and rear. 

The biggest one of all looked incredibly well kept; the bushes cut, with not a leaf out of place. The whitewash walls kept perfectly clean. This was number seven. The Potter residence.

Having finally engaged his brain, Sirius realized that at quarter to three in the morning everyone would be asleep, he could hardly go and knock on the door; even the house elf would be asleep. Pausing for a moment he came up with the solution; The Mirror. Rummaging around in his rucksack the handsome boy pulled out a small square mirror and said clearly into it; "James Potter". Nothing happened. He tried again. Nothing. God damn that boy can sleep! "James Potter, wake up you lazy git!" This time it worked and the boy woke up with a start. He had been dreaming about a girl with the most amazing green eyes. His groggy face appeared in the mirror, and Sirius couldn't help but laugh, he look a bit of a mess, must have been a late night for him too.

"Let me in mate!"

"Padfoot! What the hell are you doing here?"

"I need a place to crash for a bit. I'll explain later," replied the boy. He paused a moment as he expected the other teen to say something, but his mouth just hung open. "So," he said, "are you going to let me in or am I going to have to wait here all morning for someone else?"

A few minutes later the two boys were sat at the kitchen table, each with a bottle of Butterbeer in front of them, more for having something to do with their hands that wanting to drink anything. "So what happened then, mate?" asked the black haired boy, James.

"I just couldn't take it anymore, you know what they're like. It got too far… and I just had to go. I couldn't stay there. I can't call that place home, its not just where my parents live." Taking a sip of Butterbeer he continued. " I'll have to see if I can get my own place. I guess if I get a job over the summer I could rent a place, or work for a room at the Leaky Cauldron." With that he fell silent, thinking through his plans until he went back to Hogwarts.

The other boy was shocked. "You can't do that, Pads! You can stay with us! Mum and Dad won't mind at all. You spend ages over at the summer anyway, and you can just have the room that your in now. It's perfect, Pads! "

The taller boy shook his head. "I couldn't Prongs; I'd feel as though I was imposing on your parents. They do enough for me as it is. "

"Nonsense. They always say that you're the second son they never had. Your staying." he said in a final sort of way that put an end to the conversation. Not long after they agreed that it would be best for them both to go back to bed and wait until a reasonable time to ask Mr. and Mrs. about Sirius staying for the whole summer. James helped the boy drag his trunk up the stairs to the guest bedroom Sirius always took when he visited; it was adjacent to James's own, with its own en suit. The room looked the same as always; painted in neutral tones of cream and brown, with a thick soft carpet underfoot. The furniture was similar to that around the rest of the house, elegant and tasteful, let obviously expensive. The whole house radiated the fact that the family had money. But the Potters didn't flaunt it, it was just… there. The room was fitted with a king-size bed, a wardrobe, a chest of draws, two bedside cabinets, a dresser and a writing desk: everything that he would need, and more, as he looked over at the wash basket; the chances of him using that were quite slim.

As his best friend's snores drifted through the walls Sirius stripped down to his boxers and got into bed, relishing the feel of the sheets on his skin. He lay there for some time, trying to relax enough to sleep. Quite some time later he gave up; there was just o much going through his head right now. He sighed and gor back out of the bed and walked over to where he had dumped his trunk. Pulling out his clothes he set about hanging them up, so they wouldn't be too creased in the morning. As he did, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, and did a double take, his stormy grey eyes raking over every inch of his body. No longer was he the skinny thirteen/fourteen year old boy; he had put on quite a bit of weight over the last year. A little too much comfort food, he decided as he pinched the fat on his stomach. That needs to go. He was one of the two most popular people at Hogwarts, a renowned Marauder; it was important to keep his body in trim. More so now that the he realized the girls seemed to think that he was a 'hot pick' at Hogwarts. He considered joining the Quidditch team to make sure that he kept in shape once he got back to school.

His stunning eyes slip upwards to his hair and he decided that he could do with something new and fashionable. The lank, dark brown locks that hung around his ears did nothing to compliment his aristocratic features.

Sirius looked up as the sun hit the parchment he had been writing on, it was morning already. Rereading what he had written he put down his quill, satisfied with his nights work; he had before him a list of things he wanted to do before he went back to Hogwarts. Stretching he padded his way to the bathroom and took a shower. He couldn't help but sigh contently as the hot water streamed over his aching shoulders, washing away some of the blood from the night before. As he stepped out and wrapped himself in a towel he felt like all the tension had been washed away too; he felt like a new person.

Deciding it was time to wake James so that he could get some breakfast, he had barely managed to put one foot out of the door before he heard a squeak coming from near his navel.

"Master Black! Bobble has set breakfast in the kitchen, when Master Black is ready to eat." The noise had of course come from the Potter's house elf, Bobble.

"Thanks Bobble, but you shouldn't bother on my account."

"Bobble lives to serve the Potters and any guest is to be made to feel like the family, Master Black. Is there anything that Bobble can get Sirius Black?"

"No, no, thank you."

With that the house elf bowed and vanished, just as Sirius shook his head; he'd never get used to an elf not being… well… Kreature-ish. A yawning sound came from the door way next to Sirius. He was about to greet his friend, but realized that he seemed incapable of coherent speech as he grunted "Food." Being quite used to his friends morning phases, he nodded and followed the boy down the hallway and the stairs back the cavernous kitchen, where there were lots of different breakfast items covering the table. And James's very surprised looking parents.

"Sirius, how lovely to see you. How long have you been here?" she said all this while giving him a hug that reminded him of how it might feel to be hugged by a mother.

"You can stay as long as you want to, Son" said Mr. Potter as he shook hands with the boy, answering the unspoken question in Sirius's mind.

"Thank you," was all he could say.

The two boys chatted most of the day through, both being too tired from the night before to do much that involved moving. James tried unceremoniously to get Sirius to tell him what had happened the night before, but everytime the subject got changed. The last time this happenend the topic of conversation was steered towards plans for tomorrow.

"I dunno mate, you have any ideas?" asked Sirius.

"Nope."

A knock at the door disrupted the conversation. "Sirius?" The dark haired boy quickly crossed the room and opened the door to Mrs. Potter. "Sorry to interrupt you too boys, but I forgot to ask at breakfast; Is there anything that you need Sirius? You didn't bring much with you went you left. So what do you need – and don't worry about it costing us money, you know perfectly well that it's not going to make a difference."

"Erm… Well maybe the next time you go out..."

"I was going to go to Diagon Ally tomorrow to pick up some new dress robes, and I could go into Muggle London after, if you needed anything? Different colour bedding maybe? We'll be needing some more if you're staying here; you might as well choose what you want."

The thought of Muggle London gave Sirius an idea. "Mrs. Potter," he said as sweetly as he could, "could we collect the robes for you? I would like to go to Muggle London; I've only ever been to the train station. My parents wouldn't even let me see the outside of the station."

"What a wonderful idea, and it will save my poor legs a trip," replied the old witch. "Although, I'm a little concerned that you haven't been before; you could very easily get lost. Could you perhaps ask Remus to come with you?"

The boys glanced at each other, both thinking the same thing; it was only the day after the full moon and it was unlikely that the sandy haired teen would be in any condition to go shopping for a day. "We'll ask and see if he can come. He did tell us that he would be pretty busy the first few weeks of the holiday," replied James, the lie coming smoothly off his lips. It was second nature to both boys to lie convincingly when it came to Remus.

"That is good enough for me. Now you'll have to go to Gringotts first. James," she looked over at her son. "You will have to go into the family vault to get some money for you both, and then you'll have to speak to a goblin to get some Muggle money... Pounds, I think they are. Ask for one hundred and fifty. That should give you plenty enough for anything you need, Sirius. "

Both boys' mouths dropped open that was a lot of money. Mrs Potter quickly added that Sirius was to keep the change, or spend it on himself, as she had no use for Muggle money. "Enjoy yourselves boys."

"Thank you and we will," came the chorus of response.

Authors note. Well, this is the beginning. It may not seem like much yet, but it will have lots off smut and fluff in it as they arrive back at Hogwarts... maybe earlier if you drop a review asking for some.

I'd be grateful if you'd review – I'm very conscious that I'm not the best of writers and I always look for where Ican improve – so if you like it tell me, if you don't please tell me why! I'll reply either on the end f the chapters or privately. Thanks.