POV: Ahsoka Skywalker

Six months later.

We'd managed to get off of that ship after trying for well over a month to get in contact with somebody. Luckily for us, Obi-Wan had demanded that search parties be sent and one of them finally found us. I'd been so relieved to be freed from this hell hole. I nearly jumped Obi-Wan as soon as I saw him. For the last month, it's only been Anakin, his father, and me. Skylar never talked to Anakin, but he did talk to me. Anakin had been… breaking a lot. I could see him falling to pieces and he stayed up endlessly to search the galaxy for our son via holographic maps. Unfortunately, Obi-Wan wouldn't let him leave.

I didn't want Anakin to go out on his own, especially in this state of mind. It wasn't healthy for him to be harboring so much pain and anger inside of him. He hadn't given me one affectionate touch since Kylar was taken from us. It actually hurt me a lot more than I let on. He'd become more machine than man and I worried about him. His sanity was clearly not where it had been. After six months, he kept trying. He never stopped looking for Kylar.

I laid in bed beside him. It was roughly three in the morning and I couldn't help but wonder how much pain he held back. He kept parts of him hidden beneath his barrier and I wanted to know what was going on. I needed to know if he was stable enough to function out there. This was around the time he'd usually wake up from a nightmare, too. I watched him make minor thrashing motions and start whispering incoherently. It hurt me to see him like this. He just wasn't the same man I thought I knew. Yes, his protective side was still the same, but he just… I felt like he held no love for me anymore. We never undressed around each other. The most skin shone had been during the night when he'd remove his shirt or when I'd come out of the shower with a towel around me.

His arm flew out and hit the nightstand and he shot up, breathing heavily, twisting the blanket. I sat up, staring at his face. He was sweating bullets and I saw the terror in his eyes. He looked at me and I couldn't help but cry a little. I'd stopped crying months ago because I knew it hurt him more, but I couldn't stop myself this time. "Baby," he whispered, his voice deep with hurt. I felt him shift on the bed and he pulled me against him. Honestly, that shocked me. He hadn't done that in a while. He kissed my right montral gently and squeezed my left shoulder. "I'm sorry, Soka. I really am."

I cried against him. He was drenched in sweat and I felt his heart pounding against my head. I just didn't want him to let me go. I didn't want to lose the feeling of being loved or of loving him. I had been afraid he'd do something reckless enough to take his own life and everyday was a waking nightmare because I didn't know what he'd do. He'd become less and less predictable.

I rubbed his chest and he lifted his right hand to hold my hand on his skin. "Ani, I love you." I continued crying and it began to hurt. My heart tightened as I continued, not letting him respond. "Do you still love me?" I whispered.

I felt his emotional pain. "Of course I do, Ahsoka. I love you with all of my heart. I know I haven't been the best husband in the galaxy for the last few months and I'm very sorry that you think I don't love you. I love you so much. There's… There's nothing that will change the way I feel about you. Nothing." I loved the sincerity in his voice and I could feel it inside of him as well.

I nodded and pushed myself off of him gently. "I'm sorry I thought –"

"No," he whispered, shaking his head slowly, his eyes locked on me. "You had every right to think the way you do. I haven't said I love you in a while and I've been very distant from you. I'm sorry, my love. I promise I'll show you I love you more. I've just been so stressed and I've been focusing on him so much. I just… I feel empty without him here. I'm sorry that I've been hurting you like this."

I leaned towards him slowly, only to be quickly engulfed by his luscious lips. He held my neck gently and kissed me as lovingly as he could and I could tell that he'd been meaning to do this for a while. I knew how he was feeling and I could understand. I just didn't like the way he'd detached himself from everything and everyone. Even Obi-Wan had come to me in concern for him. "I love you, Ani. I'm sorry things are the way they are. If I hadn't left him –"

"I would have lost you both," he interjected. "He would have killed you and taken Kylar. I'd rather have you here with me to help me find him. I… I love you, my Soka. I love you very much." He kissed my lips again for a few moments before talking again. "I love you." He kept repeating it, kissing my lips, my cheeks, my forehead, my nose…. He'd lightened up and I felt some light inside of him return. There was still a lot of darkness inside of him, but that wouldn't go away until we had Kylar with us and Palpatine's corpse burned to a crisp.

I pressed myself against his sweaty chest and closed my eyes. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and leaned his head against my montrals. "Anakin, I'm sorry I let you down."

He seemed surprised. "Soka, you've never let me down." He squeezed me lovingly and I scooted closer to him. He kissed my montrals again and I sighed. "What's wrong?"

"Ani, we haven't made love in six months," I whispered. I wasn't much of an instigator, but I did want him really bad. I needed his body right now. He watched me for a minute until I pulled back. I gave him a pleading look and he kissed my lips. "I know it's not appropriate because of what's going on, but –"

He pressed his lips against mine for a few moments to silence me. "Uh uh," he said, shaking his head, pressing his forehead against me. "You're my wife, Ahsoka. I'm sorry that I've been like this. I've, honestly, missed loving you."

I moved closer to him, pushing him gently onto his back. I just realized that he didn't wear pants to bed tonight, leaving him only in his boxers. He stared up at me for a moment, smiling beautifully. I liked the way he looked at me. It wasn't one of those looks that he used when he was waiting for something to be over with. He looked excited and happy, which I hadn't seen in quite some time.

We both undressed ourselves before he gently laid me on my back. I wanted to be on top, but I didn't want to ruin the love. As long as I had him, I didn't really care what position we were in. He guided himself into me and steadied himself, pressing his palms against the pillows, rubbing his thumbs against my montrals as he slowly began to make love to me. Neither one of us wanted to rush it and make it one of those crazy sex nights. It's been forever since we did anything and it felt nice to just enjoy being together – physically and emotionally. He kissed my lips gently, his loving warmth seeping into my mouth.

We stayed like this and just… talked. It was nice. This was something we hadn't done in a while either. I liked when we shared moments like this. I liked feeling him move away and against me at a slow pace. He kissed my neck and jaw gently as I talked to him. I knew he was listening very intently despite kissing me. "Have you ever thought about what life would be like if we never got married?" I asked him, running my fingers through his hair.

"No."

"Why not?" I thought it would've been him thinking about what life would have been like had Padme not died, had we not come close like we did.

"Because I'm perfectly happy like this." He smiled at me. "I don't think about being with anyone but you. You've made me really happy, Ahsoka."

My heart warmed up and I rubbed his neck, returning his smile. Considering how depressed he'd been about losing Kylar, I was touched to see him smiling again. Anakin could feel Kylar's life, so we knew he wasn't dead. He was out there somewhere and we would find him.

Anakin and I decided to pick up the pace a little while later when we'd decided that we'd done enough talking. We'd shifted so that he was sitting and I was on his lap. He kissed me and groaned at the same time and I let out several moans and gasps. My body shook against his after a while and he held me against him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned my head against his until we'd both finished.

He, being sore, gently lifted me off of him and set me beside him. My body felt alive and I could tell that he felt the same way. He rubbed himself, groaning quietly at the pain he felt. I knew it wasn't horrible for him. It just happened sometimes between long sex intermissions. I laid on my back, throwing my arms up so that my hands were level with my head. I stared at his face and he gave me a silly smile. "What's that look for?" I teased him.

He looked me over and chuckled. "I just enjoy your beauty, Soka. I've never seen a woman more beautiful in heart and body than you." After a few minutes, he was able to move without hurting. He crawled on top of me and placed his hands in mine, kissing my lips tenderly. "I love you."

He rolled to lay on his side, facing me. He pulled my left hand over with him, not letting go. "I love you," I said aloud. I stared at his face and I saw Kylar's little one. He kissed my knuckles and I saw tears forming in his eyes. I pushed myself up a little, resting on my elbow. "Are you okay?"

He nodded silently, his tears sliding down his face and onto the pillow. I silently pressed him and he knew I wanted him to talk to me. I squeezed his hand and he broke down. He sat up and grabbed the blanket, pulling it over his head. I stared at the bulge that had been formed by his body beneath it. I laid down and scooted close to him, lifting the blanket. He was sniffling and rubbing his eyes with the side of his hand. "I want my baby back," he said through his sobs. I frowned. I felt so helpless, so useless. Daddy missed his baby boy so much… I stroked his hair and he moved closer, burying his face into my neck. "I need him back," he gasped.

"I know, sweetheart. I really do. I know I've not shown it much lately, but I do miss our baby. I worry about him every waking moment." I kissed his forehead. "We'll get him back."

"I want to go now," he whispered. I could understand his impatience. He'd tried the patience thing the first few weeks and it took a downward spiral as time passed by. His comlink went off and he threw the blanket, jumping up and twisting towards the nightstand to grip it, clicking the button to answer. "Skywalker," he said, his voice cracking.

"Anakin, you'd better come down to the war room…" Obi-Wan didn't sound too happy and that bothered me as much as it bothered Anakin.

"On my way. Ahsoka will come with me." He shut the com off and we shared a brief, sexual yet passionate, glance. "Let's cross our fingers that we get some news finally," he said, his eyes sparking with hope. We quickly got up, dressed, and made our way down to the war room.