A/N: Another story based on 06x18 "Lauren" it's set after my story "Devil Boston" although can stand alone. It's Hotch centric, his thoughts while Emily is in surgery. AU in which Emily and Hotch are married.
Enjoy:)
Disclaimer: I don't own them.
~Despair ~
Hotch was sitting on the floor, his head buried in his hands, his breathing short. He knew he had to change his clothes; his shirt was soaked in blood, her blood, his wife's blood, Emily's blood. His skin was soaked too, he probably should wash his hands too. Right now though he is paralyzed couldn't move, he could barely breathe. Penelope's soft sobs could be heard not far away, although slightly muffled by Derek's chest. Rossi, his friend Dave, was praying in Italian, under his breath J.J. was running her hand up and down his back soothing him. The feeling of failure was too strong, he felt it soak through every pore of his body. Failure was all he was feeling. She was dying, died once already in the ambulance, he couldn't lose her. He wouldn't lose her. He hoped he wouldn't lose her.
He can't lose his better half, his wife, his friend, his Emily… Not now, not ever.
A/N: What do you think? Liked it?