Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto; the series is owned and created by Masashi Kishimoto-sensei

Not many things can make Uzumaki Naruto speechless, the number of times the blond was caught being gob smacked can be counted on one hand. But here he was, standing in front of his long time friend and ally, the leader of Sunagakure, in his office with his mouth hanging open.

"…uuuh". The blond said intelligently.

Naruto took a deep breath; he must have heard Gaara wrong or misunderstood the meaning of his words like he usually does.

"Could you run that by me again? I...I don't think I really got it"

It was now Gaara's turn to sigh in exasperation at his friends stalling. Here he was having a crisis, and the one friend he felt he could rely on was acting dim.

"Naruto I trust you to keep it together and not react in the same way Kankurou had"

"What did Kankurou do?"

Gaara leaned further back in his chair as he recalled the dreadful event. It happened no more than a week ago, when the attentions of the female population of Sunagakure were becoming more than what the Kazekage could handle. He could not have a moment to himself outside the office walls.

Constantly being hounded to the point of madness; he sought his brother's advice on how to further dissuade the ladies.

"Are you out of your mind?!?!" was the wise brother's response. "All us average guys are struggling to snag chicks and you're here complaining that they're giving you too much attention!!"

"Attention is putting it lightly; this is a downright harassment and invasion of my privacy!"

Kankurou scoffed at Gaara, sure the women were a bit head-over-heals when it came to his brother but Gaara had always handled them well with his aloof attitude; until today that is.

It has been 3 years since Gaara almost died at the hands of Akatsuki. And in those years Kankurou's baby brother had grown into a man, a leader. People didn't fail to notice how the handsome youth had filled out nicely; growing an extra few centimetres in height. As for his character; Kankurou didn't think Gaara could grow any older, but the Kazekage had the soul of an old man; opting to have quiet evenings at home than to spend time with people his age having 'fun'.

That did not deter the ladies in the least bit; they persistently tried to win their Kazekage's attention to the point of desperation. And that was when the stalking began. One would think that a bunch of those ninjas had better sense than to stalk the man who was given the title of the strongest ninja in the village.

Of course Gaara would never harm any of them, but that didn't mean that his patience wasn't reaching its limit, and that is where Kankurou is supposed to come in.

The puppet user scratched his head in contemplation, and then a devious smile crept on his painted face.

The only way to stop a horde of hormonal women was to destroy their image of a single, available Kazekage into…

"…I've got it!!"

Gaara looked up at his brother's face; he had a sinking feeling that whatever solution Kankurou was about to offer; he would not like it one bit. But Gaara was the one to ask for help so he must hear his brother out first before making a hasty decision.

The Kazekage's stare bore into his brother as he waited for Kankurou to speak. The puppet user needed no more encouragement than that.

"Y'see the problem is that you're available, so if you had someone then that would definitely put them off the chase!"

"How will that solve my predicament? I fail to see your reasoning!"

Kankurou took a deep breath, that wasn't all he wanted to say, there was a slight twist in his 'genius plan'

"You need to let me finish first okay? I know that just having a girl isn't enough. On the other hand you'll have a battle royal on your hands. When I said look 'unavailable' I meant it in a way that would make those ladies lose all hope"

"And what way is that?"

"…You need to be gay"

"……"

Kankurou closed his eyes tightly; expecting the wave of sand to throw him out of his brother's office, he had only meant to say that as a joke to lighten his brother's mood, but the blow never came. Kankurou slowly opened his eyes to see Gaara looking down with his brows furrowed in deep thought.

No. Fucking. Way.

Gaara looked up into his brothers eyes with determination written across his face, and as soon as the red head was about to speak Kankurou put his hands in front of himself; shaking his head in an attempt to shield himself from the words his brother was about to say.

"Don't go there Gaara! I only meant it as a joke! I want to help you out but I am definitely NOT going that far!"

"But you said…"

"Forget what I said! Just forget it!" Kankurou yelled in exasperation, Gaara narrowed his eyes at his brother. Why was he being so difficult? It was his idea originally.

"We would just be pretending…"

"No, no, no…"

"…And you are the only one in Suna I can trust"

"…No friggin way! No! I am not into incest, even if it's pretend!"

Gaara made a move to stand; Kankurou took that as his queue to vamoose and get as far away from Gaara as possible, but he wasn't fast enough to beat the sand as it caught him by the ankle and flung him out of the office through the window.

Although it was true that Gaara trusted Kankurou the most in Sunagakure, he still had another friend whom he could trust implicitly in this delicate matter.

And that was what brought Naruto to him, the blond had been sent to Suna on a mission which gave Gaara the perfect opportunity to 'proposition' his friend.

"Eeeeeeeehhhh!!" said the blond after hearing Gaara's recollection of the previous week's events.

"I don't know Gaara, aren't you overreacting a bit?!?"

Two hands slammed on the desk as Gaara stood in a whirl of sand and fury.

"'Overreacting'?!? Me?!? " Yelled the redhead. He had to put a stop to this fiasco before he lost all his sense of humanity and buried the lot in a wave of sand.

"Do you have any idea how persistent they are?! I cannot even bathe in peace! 2 nights ago one twit tried to sneak into my bed! I thought it was an assassination attempt and nearly stuffed the daft woman with sand! And you dare to say that I am overreacting?!"

"Whoa! Don't you have your own ANBU guarding you?"

"She was the ANBU captain" hissed the redhead.

"Oh…shit"

"The situation has gotten out of hand, I cannot afford another mishap! This tomfoolery must stop now!"

"So you want me to…"

"Put them off the chase"

"And to do that I have to…"

"Be gay, and 'with' me"

Be with me, hearing those words made Naruto's blood rush to his cheeks; in embarrassment of course. He had no idea how to go about Gaara's plan and if it was anyone else asking this of him; he would have immediately declined. He was not into that kind of thing, and would never even pretend to be so. Just the thought of another man touching him in that way made him shudder. But for some reason, because Gaara is the one asking, the thought doesn't seem so repulsive anymore. He wondered why that was so, and figured it was because Gaara was not just any guy, he was his good friend, a friend whom he had a special kind of bond with; the kind that can only come to be when two people have shared the same god awful fate.

And also, Gaara is not the kind of guy to ask for favours. Which means that he really is at the end of his rope, and there is no way Naruto was going to leave him hanging.

"All right…"

Gaara made his way around his desk and stood in front of Naruto, the blond had just mumbled something that almost sounded like consent.

"Say that again"

"I said 'all right', I'll help you out" The blond lifted his eyes to meet his friend's inquisitive stare. Once Gaara made sure that Naruto was serious he rewarded the blond with one of his rare toothy smiles that made Naruto's heart jump.

"Thank you"