Ode
to the Held Item
By Father Hulk
A/N: Hello! Here's a fun project that came to me earlier today. I'll mark it as complete for now but I'm sure I'll come up with more soon, so stay tuned!
Focus Band, Focus Band,
thy power's divine,
You let me attack just
one more time.
Focus Band, Focus Band,
this is not bull-spit,
Can you imagine
yourself on a Wobbuffet?
Hanging on, at one HP,
That's all you really
need, you see.
It gives me time to be
real mean,
To use skull bash, or
solar beam.
I know that one time,
you'll never fail,
As enemies cower at my
flail.
Thank you, Focus Band,
you're just for me,
I just wish you didn't
cost so much BP.
Roses are red, I like
TV,
The Power items are
great to boost EV's.
All six stats, there's
one for each,
They extend the length
of a level up's reach.
Violets are blue, I
love that show "Reaper,"
Power Lens and Bracer
are for raising a sweeper.
"Old Christine" is
awesome but that Ellie show stank,
Power Weight is awesome
for raising a tank.
Sarah Silverman is
so-so, you see,
The Belt and the Band
help conserve HP!
But when it comes to
"Cavemen" I say,
Strap on the Anklet and
run, run away!
Berries, Berries, on
your trees,
Smell caught up upon
the breeze,
Sniffed by a Drowzee,
made him sneeze,
Berries, Berries, on your trees.
Tick, tock, Metronome
tick
Tock, tick, boosts your
moves tock,
Tick, tock, in a row
tick,
Run out of PP? Make a
plan quick!
There once was a man
from Pewter,
Whose Porygon came out
of his computer.
It bore a Dubious Disc,
He thought he was
slick,
Till through his
history it rooted.
Looks like some food
waste,
But heals you when
you're in pain,
What a nifty thing.
Choice Band, Choice
Band, I've been thinkin',
What the hell had I
been drinkin?
Just one move the
entire fight?
I must get more sleep
tonight!