Alright, guys. I am so, so, so sorry for piling stories onto you like this. But I get so many great ideas, and I just have to turn them into stories, ya know? I promise, this will be the last random fic for a while. I will update my other stories and get myself back on track. xD
Anyway, thanks to a friend of mine, I have become obsessed with the Spanna (Spencer and Hanna) pairing. I had this song stuck in my head, and so I thought, "Well, what a perfect song to write a Spanna fic for!" So that's just what I did.
The song is Fix You, by Coldplay. I, unfortunately, own nothing but the idea to put these two great things together.
Enjoy!
When you try your best but you don't succeed.
The tires screamed as they slid on the wet pavement, black rubber gaining its grip for a second before losing it again and sending the car spinning towards the edge of the road. Pale hands fumbled desperately to maintain a firm hold on the steering wheel, the rapidly rotating wheel burning her delicate skin. She was lucky there was no one else around her.
Her hands finally grabbed the steering wheel in the right way, brakes screeching as the car came to an abrupt stop. The front wheels were buried in knee-deep grass, while the back ones were planted firmly on the asphalt. The sounds of the engine wheezing and sputtering as it calmed down were all she could hear.
When you get what you want, but not what you need.
She was trembling as she pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged them tightly. Her breathing was heavy, clouding up the windows and making it seem like she was sitting in a car full of fog. Blood pounded in her ears, her pulse matching the steady thrum of the rain that poured down around her.
She stared straight ahead, blue eyes wide and unblinking as she watched raindrops splash onto the silver hood of her car. And then, all of a sudden…she broke. A loud sob escaped her throat, shaking her entire body and filling her eyes with tears. Her knuckles were white as she hugged her knees even tighter, burying her nose in the soft material of her jet-black skirt. Tears spilled down her cheeks, mixing with the silky blond hair that framed her doll-like face.
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep.
Why did this happen? Everything had been going so perfectly. Better than it had been in months. She thought it was finally going to work out. She thought he was actually going to be the one she'd spend the rest of her life with.
How wrong she was.
It was all a lie. He hadn't been getting nicer, he had been acting. He had preparing her for this very moment, setting her up for disaster. And she hadn't even seen it coming. She had fallen right into his trap, getting tangled up in the mess of secrets and lies until there was seemingly no way out.
Stuck in reverse.
The tears dripping down her face were as constant as the raindrops that rolled down the outside of her windows. She choked on her sobs, a salty taste filling her mouth when a teardrop would find its way onto her pink lips, eventually getting mixed in with the saliva on her tongue. Her chest was heaving and her heart was beating so fast she was almost certain it was going to burst out of her and leap into her hands. It definitely felt like it already had.
And the tears come streaming down your face.
When you lose something you can't replace.
It felt like she had been crying for only a few minutes, when in reality, it had been hours. By the time she finally looked up, the light outside was dim, the sun just about to disappear behind the horizon. Her car was still on, the low hum of the engine adding to the sounds of her scratchy breathing and the still steady pitter-patter of the rain.
She took a deep, shaky breath, unbending her knees and stretching out her thin legs. Her kneecaps popped and she winced, tensing up for a moment before relaxing onto the worn brown leather drivers' seat. She sniffled loudly, pushing her matted, damp hair out of her face and wiping the last of her tears away. Her mouth was dry and she could feel the puffiness around her eyes. Her arms were covered in red splotches and she was sure they were on her face as well.
When you love someone, but it goes to waste.
Could it be worse?
Sighing heavily, she put the car into reverse and then placed her hands on the steering wheel. She backed up until her car was fully on the road once more. She had to go somewhere. She couldn't stay parked on the side of the Pennsylvania Turnpike forever.
She shifted the car into drive and then slowly made her way back onto the correct part of the road. The freeway was strangely empty, bare except for a faded red VW Bug and a large white minivan. She decided she'd go home. Her mother was away on a business trip, so she'd be all alone on this dark, dreary evening. Curling up on the couch with some hot chocolate and a good chick flick sounded like the perfect relaxation technique right now. If she was distracted enough, she could forget all about this for a little while.
Lights will guide you home.
And ignite your bones.
And I will try to fix you.
She pulled into the driveway, stopped the car and was about to venture out into the pouring rain when she realized…this wasn't her house. She recognized it, it was familiar to her, but it wasn't hers. It was a large house, black shutters strikingly dark against the bright white base. There were six square windows, all of them dark except for the one in the bottom left corner. A smaller, round window was stuck in the middle of the highest peak of the house. The room behind it was dark as well.
Somehow, despite the fact that this wasn't her planned destination, she grabbed her purse and swung open the car door. She moved as if she were in a trance; her body felt like it was suspended in a tub of jello. She slammed the door shut, not even bothering to lock it before starting up the driveway. The rain was coming down in sheets, instantly soaking her long, blond hair and her clothing. But she didn't stop walking, even though her designer Zac Posen boots were filled with half an inch of water.
And high up above or down below.
When you're too in love to let it go.
By the time she reached the front door, she wasn't even sure whether she was dreaming or not. She felt numb all over, like she had taken a bath in a tub full of ice. She was shivering so hard her teeth were clacking together, but she was barely aware of it. All she was focused on was the big, mahogany door in front of her. She reached towards it with a shaking hand, pressing two pale, dripping wet fingers to the round doorbell.
She could hear the loud chime of the bell echoing through the huge house. The sound flew through the air, invisible to the eye but certainly not to the ear. It bounced off of any obstacles that got in its way, hitting the staircase and ricocheting off the walls until it reached the eardrums of the lone person in the house. She heard their footsteps, quiet at first but increasingly louder as their owner came closer and closer to where she was standing. And then they stopped, and she could hear the click of the lock as it was turned by slender fingers. Then the person inside stepped back, and the door was swung open.
But if you never try you'll never know.
Just what you're worth.
"Hanna?"
The voice was soft, filled with uncertainty. The girl sounded like she didn't know who this person was standing on her front porch, even though she had seen her practically every day since she was four years old. She twisted the tip of her long, brown braid around her pointer finger, staring at the girl in front of her with wide brown eyes.
"S-Spencer. I don't even know why I'm here. I'm just…He just…I-I-I-"
"Just come in. Sweetheart, you're going to get hypothermia if you stay out there. Come inside and I'll clean you up."
Lights will guide you home.
And ignite your bones.
And I will try to fix you.
Hanna swallowed heavily, but took hesitant, trembling steps into the house. Spencer shut the door behind her and locked it while Hanna leaned up against the wall in order to be in a better position for taking off her boots.
"Come here. Let me help you with your jacket."
Spencer kicked the soggy boots aside and then helped Hanna out of her sopping wet Marc Jacobs coat. She hung it up on the empty black coat-rack next to the front door. Hanna didn't say a word the entire time. She just watched Spencer work, blue eyes wide with alert. She was like a troubled child, trembling and afraid, unsure of where she was and what she was doing there.
Tears stream down on your face.
When you lose something you cannot replace.
"Poor baby, you're so cold."
Spencer led Hanna upstairs and into her bedroom, one arm around her shoulders to keep the timid blond from stumbling or falling over. She gently sat her down on the bed and instructed her to raise her arms over her head so she could remove her soaked-through white camisole-style top. Hanna watched Spencer pull down her skirt and toss it aside. Her stockings were removed as well.
"Do you mind if I take these off?"
Hanna could only muster a nod in response. Spencer smiled softly, leaning forward to press a gentle kiss to Hanna's clammy forehead. Then she gingerly undid the clasp on her black bra, sliding it down her shoulders and tossing it atop the growing pile of wet clothing. She hesitated with her panties, eventually pulling them down her pale thighs.
"Wow."
Spencer gulped, her eyes traveling over Hanna's naked body. She was very pale, and her skin was moist and pruney. Her thighs were big, but not too big, lying perfectly on top of each other after Hanna had crossed her legs. Her legs were long and thin, ending in delicate, round ankles and petite feet. Her arms hung at her sides, hands folded over the barely-visible patch of dirty blond hair in her lap. Her breasts were full and perfectly rounded, the nipples pink and erect because she was so cold. Her hair was damp and matted, blond curls sticking to the skin on her shoulders and chest. Her eyes were the only bright feature on her body, blindingly blue orbs sticking out from an otherwise bland face.
"You're beautiful."
"T-Thanks."
It was the first word she'd said in about twenty minutes. It was the first time she'd actually known what to say.
Tears stream down on your face.
And I…
And all of a sudden, a strong impulse came over Spencer. An impulse she was already quite familiar with. But this time, she couldn't control the impulse. It swirled inside of her like a toxic poison, racing through her veins and speeding up the beat of her heart. It flourished in her soul and ignited her bones. It took control over her, making her head spin and her stomach cave in while her heart leapt up into her throat. Before she even knew what was going on, the impulse had taken over.
Tears stream down on your face.
I promise you that I will learn from mistakes.
Spencer leaned over, capturing Hanna's lips in a passionate kiss. Hanna gasped in surprise, but didn't resist. She let her fingers get tangled in Spencer's soft brown locks, pulling the taller girl down on top of herself. Spencer immediately straddled Hanna's waist, her pale hands cupping Hanna's. Fireworks went off in Spencer's brain, clouding up her thoughts and clearing her mind of everything. Everything except the thin, pale, blond girl who was lying beneath her, kissing her with a passion in which she had never been kissed before.
Tears stream down on your face.
And I…
In that moment, as the two girls kissed on the bed in the dark bedroom, Hanna realized something. She realized that even though she had loved Caleb, she had loved Spencer more. Much more. She hadn't loved anyone more than she'd loved Spencer Hastings. And Caleb had seen that. He had seen the way Hanna looked at Spencer. He has seen how she stared at the tall brunette when she was at field hockey practice, or the way her hands couldn't seem to stay out of Spencer's hair when she sat behind her in ethics class. He had noticed that Hanna was in love with Spencer before she herself had.
That's why he had left her that morning. Not because he wanted to break her heart, but because he knew that if she stayed with him, her heart would get broken anyway. He had broken up with her, knowing she would run straight into Spencer's arms…and stay there. He knew that Spencer loved Hanna just as much as Hanna loved her. He knew she would be safe with Spencer. He knew that even though he had broken her a little, Spencer would put her back together. Spencer would fix her.
Lights will guide you home.
And ignite your bones.
And I will try to fix you.