A WEIRD AND WACKY CHRISTMAS AT HOGWARTS
(It's Christmas at Hogwarts, and our favourite trio is sitting on the floor opening their presents)
RON: (groan) Oh, mom knitted me another sweater!
HERMIONE: Can I have it? I'm the only one of us three who doesn't have one yet!
RON: Okay, but I'm warning you, it smells like...
HERMIONE: EW!!! (throws the sweater on Harry's bed) Did someone drop Dungbombs on this or something?!
RON: Not exactly, much worse really. Errol, Hermes, and Pig...
HERMIONE: DON'T TELL ME!!! DON'T TELL ME!!! I THINK I KNOW!!!
HARRY: (gasp!) MY BED!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HERMIONE: Oops, I meant to throw it on Ron's...(gets an evil glance from Ron)...er, why don't you open Ron's present, Harry?
RON: Yeah! Open it! Open it!
HARRY: Oh boy! It feels really heavy!
RON: Come on! I'm not leaving 'til you open it, and I really have to use the toilet!
HARRY: Furby! Furby! Furby!...Tickle-Me-Elmo???
RON: Sorry, I tried to get you the last Furby in Hogsmeade, but the old lady I was wrestling with for it knocked me out cold and got it. Now, Tickle-Me-Elmos were 2 Sickles a pound! Er, why don't you give it a test tickle...
HARRY: A WHAT!?
RON: Nevermind...
HERMIONE: Hey, what about that one wrapped in flowery pink paper over there?
HARRY: Hmm...(picks up the package) Omigosh, it's from...(gasp!)
HERMIONE and RON: WHO?!
HARRY: Voldemort!!!
RON: NO!!! And don't...
HERMIONE: Oh, don't open it! It might explode in your face, or even worse, turn your head into a toilet with a fuzzy peach coloured seat cover!
HARRY: Oh that sounds bad...but turning into a fuzzy toilet would be kinda fun for awhile...
HERMIONE: Really Harry, would you like it if I sat on your head right now and, er, sprayed your face with, er, liquid gold?
RON: I could do with some gold!
(The box starts shaking violently, and strips of wrapping paper are flung all over the place)
HARRY: It's...it's...it's opening by itself!!!
HERMIONE: It's a Terrorist Fun Barbie!
RON: No! It's Barney, and he's gonna give us a hug! (screams)
HARRY: Wait, look! It's...A PINK FURBY!!!
RON: It looks gross...maybe it's really one of those toilet covers
Hermione...
HARRY: It's what I've always wanted!!! (kisses Furby on the beak)
HERMIONE: Harry! It's probably jinxed!
RON: You really think a pink Furby would kill Harry? Look at how cute it is! It looks just like you, Hermione!
HERMIONE: But still...I'm going to get Dumbledore!!!
RON: Harry, play with it while you can! Oh, can I poke it's eyes out?
(10 seconds later...)
HARRY: Arg! This stupid thing won't shut up!!!
Ron: Yeah, but, hey! It's normal for You-Know-Who to like these sort of evil things...
HARRY: Oh, let's just blow it up. I think Hermione's right about it being jinxed...it won't shut up!
(Somewhere else...)
VOLDEMORT: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
WORMTAIL: What is it, Master?!
VOLDEMORT: (bonks Wormtail on the head with some fruitcake) Idiot! Harry Potter just blew up the Furby I got him for Christmas! It was the last one in Hogsmeade and I had to wrestle a little boy on the floor to get it! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
WORMTAIL: Er...more eggnog, Master?
THE END
Okay, now for the disclaimers: Harry Potter and all related material is property of J.K. Rowling :) Furby, Tickle-Me-Elmo, Barbie, and Barney are property of their respected companies
(It's Christmas at Hogwarts, and our favourite trio is sitting on the floor opening their presents)
RON: (groan) Oh, mom knitted me another sweater!
HERMIONE: Can I have it? I'm the only one of us three who doesn't have one yet!
RON: Okay, but I'm warning you, it smells like...
HERMIONE: EW!!! (throws the sweater on Harry's bed) Did someone drop Dungbombs on this or something?!
RON: Not exactly, much worse really. Errol, Hermes, and Pig...
HERMIONE: DON'T TELL ME!!! DON'T TELL ME!!! I THINK I KNOW!!!
HARRY: (gasp!) MY BED!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HERMIONE: Oops, I meant to throw it on Ron's...(gets an evil glance from Ron)...er, why don't you open Ron's present, Harry?
RON: Yeah! Open it! Open it!
HARRY: Oh boy! It feels really heavy!
RON: Come on! I'm not leaving 'til you open it, and I really have to use the toilet!
HARRY: Furby! Furby! Furby!...Tickle-Me-Elmo???
RON: Sorry, I tried to get you the last Furby in Hogsmeade, but the old lady I was wrestling with for it knocked me out cold and got it. Now, Tickle-Me-Elmos were 2 Sickles a pound! Er, why don't you give it a test tickle...
HARRY: A WHAT!?
RON: Nevermind...
HERMIONE: Hey, what about that one wrapped in flowery pink paper over there?
HARRY: Hmm...(picks up the package) Omigosh, it's from...(gasp!)
HERMIONE and RON: WHO?!
HARRY: Voldemort!!!
RON: NO!!! And don't...
HERMIONE: Oh, don't open it! It might explode in your face, or even worse, turn your head into a toilet with a fuzzy peach coloured seat cover!
HARRY: Oh that sounds bad...but turning into a fuzzy toilet would be kinda fun for awhile...
HERMIONE: Really Harry, would you like it if I sat on your head right now and, er, sprayed your face with, er, liquid gold?
RON: I could do with some gold!
(The box starts shaking violently, and strips of wrapping paper are flung all over the place)
HARRY: It's...it's...it's opening by itself!!!
HERMIONE: It's a Terrorist Fun Barbie!
RON: No! It's Barney, and he's gonna give us a hug! (screams)
HARRY: Wait, look! It's...A PINK FURBY!!!
RON: It looks gross...maybe it's really one of those toilet covers
Hermione...
HARRY: It's what I've always wanted!!! (kisses Furby on the beak)
HERMIONE: Harry! It's probably jinxed!
RON: You really think a pink Furby would kill Harry? Look at how cute it is! It looks just like you, Hermione!
HERMIONE: But still...I'm going to get Dumbledore!!!
RON: Harry, play with it while you can! Oh, can I poke it's eyes out?
(10 seconds later...)
HARRY: Arg! This stupid thing won't shut up!!!
Ron: Yeah, but, hey! It's normal for You-Know-Who to like these sort of evil things...
HARRY: Oh, let's just blow it up. I think Hermione's right about it being jinxed...it won't shut up!
(Somewhere else...)
VOLDEMORT: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
WORMTAIL: What is it, Master?!
VOLDEMORT: (bonks Wormtail on the head with some fruitcake) Idiot! Harry Potter just blew up the Furby I got him for Christmas! It was the last one in Hogsmeade and I had to wrestle a little boy on the floor to get it! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
WORMTAIL: Er...more eggnog, Master?
THE END
Okay, now for the disclaimers: Harry Potter and all related material is property of J.K. Rowling :) Furby, Tickle-Me-Elmo, Barbie, and Barney are property of their respected companies