From here on out: If you see anything familiar in here, then it probably isn't mine, because if it was mine, then it would have gone like this instead, now wouldn't it? Also, I apologize. I read a lot and don't necessarily remember where all of my inspirations come from, so if you write, thank you for feeding my addiction for that nebulous intoxicating phrase, What if?..
The Prologue: The Never Ending Paperwork
Book 2 of Dekuyume
Koenma prince of The Spirit World stared in awe at the document before him. With trembling fingers he ghosted his delicate fingertips across the dry ink stamp. His watery eyes traveled around his blissfully empty office, devoid of a single stack of paperwork, aside from the last dolly laden with documents ready to be sent down to the Department of Records. He was done… it had taken him centuries but he was finally done with all of the paperwork that had exponentially multiplied during the third Shikon no Tama fiasco.
He hops out of his nice chair and toddles over to the dolly, filing the last bit of paperwork in the cardboard filing box. With an austere nod to his personal assistant ogre George, he watches as the dolly is collected and toted out of his office. Once more he glances around the room before leaving, passing the cleaning crew on the way. He was going to get some sleep… The time discrepancy between the human world and The Spirit World was great enough that he should have enough time to rest before he absolutely had to get back to work, judging souls and placing them in their afterlives.
Hopefully the yōkai who were living in the annexed portion of The Spirit World, commonly referred to as the makai, would all behave for a while so he could relax before the next batch of trouble sprung up. There was something that was going to be happening soon, but he was too tired to remember what. Reaching his bedroom he collapses face first into the mattress without bothering to remove any of his clothing or even his shoes. Doesn't matter now. He would think about it in the morning.
The little kami slept for three days before finally rousing, performing some much needed personal hygiene, and getting back to his office. Oh myself. I feel a thousand orders of magnitude better. He smiles when he enters his office, there's only a small stack of paperwork waiting his attention on the corner of his desk, and the whole room has been polished to a shine.
With a huff of irritation he climbs into his office chair. Why was it that he couldn't have a throne in here again? Surely some of the more annoying souls would take him more seriously, toddler shaped or not, if he had a nicely ostentatious throne behind this desk. Koenma's eyes widen as a memory strikes him, and he quickly checks the date in the human world. With a grin he pulls out some forms from his desk filling them out while chuckling under his breath at the memories. Finishing the forms in record time, he slides them into another drawer in his desk for safekeeping before starting on the small backlog of paperwork.
Just as he finishes there is a tap on his office door and a neatly pressed ogre in a pure white loincloth enters hesitantly. "Koenma-sama, We have a bit of a problem…" the painfully familiar words strike a chord. Is… Is that the same ogre that kept coming to me with bad news during the Shikon fiasco? He stared intently at the ogre trembling in his doorway. It was a little difficult to tell, but it probably was… and with all of the paperwork he had been buried under he never did get around to seeing if the poor fool was being hazed…
He shakes his head, "Well. What is it?" The ogre shuffled forward to hand the primary operator of The Spirit World a manila folder, "There was an incident in the human world. A human managed to surprise the Death: Timing and Placement Committee, so now we have a soul and no place to put it in our afterlife. We've already received several calls from interested Kami in acquiring the soul, we just need you to make a decision on who we will be trading him to."
Koenma looks down at the file, opening it to the first page, smiling at the profile picture inside. Looks like he was right. It would be good to see him again, not that the boy would remember him. Time travel was such a messy business like that... He shakes his head in exasperation, opening one of the drawers in his desk, pulling out paperwork he had prepared just that morning. See… He did learn how to make the system work for him… eventually… Now if only he could get everything digitalized before The Division Proclamation was revoked. He asks, "I apologize, but I do not remember your name." He meets the ogre's eyes steadily and is surprised when the ogre doesn't even flinch. "However, I have noticed that you seem to be the only one bringing me bad news. Tell me, are you being forced to do this?"
The ogre rapidly shakes his head no, "No Sir… I… well, my unofficial title is Bad News Ogre. You see, I really need this job, but I… I'm blind. It actually works out pretty well, my assigned workload is spread out between everyone in the Soul Camera Monitoring Department, and whenever we have urgent bad news to deliver, I do it. It's actually easier being blind because that means I can't see how angry you are about the news I bring, so I can actually spit out the words instead of cowering in terror like the others. I do the same thing when we have to deliver bad news to Enma-Daiō."
The ogre smiles, "Thank you for noticing though. I really appreciate it." With a bow, the ogre leaves the room and a flabbergasted Koenma behind. With a sigh and a shake of his head, the toddler sized kami sucks on his pacifier, pumping excess magic into it before reaching out to press a button on his desk. The Communication link to his Secretarial Department opens. "Summon Boton-chan to my office, and have George come up here to collect Requisitions paperwork for a Spirit Egg."
Leaning back in his chair, he pulls the manila folder closer, going over the information inside to make sure that nothing had changed…again. Finding everything in order, he smiles.
Seems we will be meeting again… Yusuke Urameshi.