Disclaimer: I don't own Chicago Fire, NBC, or the characters used in this story. This is based off some of the storylines we have seen in seasons past.
A/N: This story has been in the works for over a year now. I have been afraid to publish it. I have a lot more written that needs to be edited. Thank you Whitney for giving me this story title and reading all my very rough drafts! You are a great friend!
Prologue:
It had been 3 months since Gabby Dawson's life went from perfect fiancé, planning a wedding to a broken engagement and soon to be single mother. Gabby and Matt were perfect for each other, but the job got in the way of the relationship and the relationship in the way of the job. They broke up and Matt started dating Beth; the acting Chiefs soon to be ex wife that he met at Molly's of all places. Things got awkward really fast. Boden decided to take a sabbatical from Firehouse 51 to spend time with his wife Donna and newborn son Terrance. Casey transferred to Logan Square on a deal that he would be back to Firehouse 51 when Chief Pridget was gone and Boden back at the helm of 51. Casey and Boden felt it was for the best for everyone involved… Especially Gabby.
Chapter 1
February:
It has been 2 months since Casey and I broke up and I found out from Welch that Matt was sleeping with Beth Pridgett. It was a month since Matt transferred out of 51 and I had some relief. From the time I heard Matt had moved on and was dating Beth even with his relief chief riding him hard and making his job as lieutenant of Truck 81 almost impossible, he kept on seeing her. I was watching him and shaking my head wondering what the heck was up with him and why he continuously parade her through 51. I don't know if it was to make me jealous or the chief. I think it was a little of both. When I found out he was transferring out to Logan Square, I was relieved and sad because he chose a girl over the job. Something he wouldn't do for me. It broke my heart knowing that he would do that to me, his best friend and most recently lover, for a tramp he picked up at the bar.
I was working at Molly's and I had been feeling off, but I was attributing being off to the stress of breaking up with Matt, moving, stress of work and being winter in Chicago. I was bar tending and it was a pretty quiet night. Sylvie was sitting at the bar keeping me company and she asked for a Spicy Bloody Mary. I started making her one and looking at the pickles my stomach started to turn. I opened the jar and as soon as I got a whiff of them, I turned and ran to the bathroom and started praying to the porcelain God. I cleaned up rinsed out my mouth and went back to the bar.
Sylvie looked at me and said "Are you okay Gabby?"
I shook my head and said "Yes, I've just been feeling off lately."
"When did all of this start?"
"I honestly don't know. My life has been crazy stressful the last couple of months."
"Could you be pregnant?" Sylvie asked.
I looked at her and said "who knows, I have never been a regular girl, my gynecologist wasn't even sure if I could ever get pregnant actually. I haven't slept with anyone since Matt, so I doubt it."
"After you get off let's stop at CVS since they are open 24 hours and grab a test just to be sure. With you being on truck and running into burning buildings that isn't good for pregnant lady."
I agreed and looked at the clock it's almost midnight. I decided to walk over to Otis and ask him if he would mind if I skipped out early explaining to him that I didn't feel well. Otis being Otis said no problem but you owe me and I agreed. Walking to the back room, I got my purse and jacket and walked over to Sylvie and said let's roll. The more I was thinking about it the more worried I got. What if I was pregnant? How would I tell Matt that his dream of a family is coming true but he isn't with me and we would be raising our child separately, my child could have a step mom before it's even born. I was getting more and more depressed as we drove to CVS.
I walked into the bathroom as soon as I got home. Ripped open the box read the instructions even though they are pretty self explanatory. I took the test and set it quickly set it on the counter and watched as it showed a huge plus sign almost immediately. I sat in the bathroom looking at it in disbelief and thinking how can this be happening to me? I am just making a name for myself as a kick ass firefighter, now I have to go to our interim chief and explain to him why I need to take a leave of absence for my candidacy and 51. I start to cry, I am not sure if they are happy tears or sad tears, a little bit of both. I have always dreamed of being a mom, but I had always thought I would be married to Matt first living the dream in the suburbs in a house with the picket fence and 2.5 kids and a dog. Now I am 27, single, living with a roommate that is only temporary and pregnant. I finally walk out of the bathroom and seek out Sylvie who is sitting with a bottle of tequila in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. She takes one look at me, sees my tear streaked face and hands me the bottle of water and gets up and puts the bottle of tequila back in the liquor cabinet and walks back to me and encircles me in a hug. I cry on her shoulder and we go sit on the couch. She asks me what's next. I state "I honestly don't know, I am going to seek out Hermann in the morning since he is my lieutenant and go from there." Then the question I had running through my head was spoken "Are you going to tell Matt?" I just sighed and started to tear up, saying I don't know. He deserves to know, but do I want to have to share custody of my child and see him or her 50% of the time even as a newborn? I am not sure I could go through with that Sylvie!" I cry even harder and finally get up and go to my room, crawling into bed not bothering to change into my pajamas and cried for what seemed like hours. I ended up tossing and turning the whole night don't think I got much sleep.
I finally closed my eyes and then I woke up to my alarm blaring in my ear. I crawl out of bed and go into the bathroom to get ready for work. I look in the mirror and see dark circles under my eyes and mumble to myself I hope my make up can cover this. I quickly take a shower and wash my body, taking extra time looking and my stomach and noticing that is isn't a flat tummy like I remember it being. I wonder how I didn't notice that before, but I am actually starting to feel excited about this life growing inside of me. I quickly finish up in the shower, change into my uniform quick, put my hair in a ponytail and put on some make up covering the bags under my eyes the best I could. I grabbed a bottle out of the fridge throw my bag over my shoulder and grabbed my keys of the counter and head to the firehouse.
I walk into the firehouse searching for Hermann. I walked into the common room and the first thing Mouch asked me before I was even able to get changed out was if I was going to make breakfast not even looking up at me from his spot on the couch watching who knows what on TV. I look at him and didn't respond right away waiting for him to turn his attention to me. Once he finally notices I haven't spoken he turns his head and looks at me and says "Well?" I start to get irritated and say "Yes, in a few minutes, I need to talk Hermann quick before I do anything else." Mouch and Otis mumble together I am sure it can wait, we are starving. I ignore them and walk toward Hermann's office. I hate having to go into that office, I have too many memories of that office. If only Hermann knew what has happened in there behind those closed blinds and locked door,, he would cringe and ask for a new mattress. I giggle to myself imagining my hard as nails, soft hearted mentor having that mental image in his head..
As I approach the officers offices, I see him sitting at the desk working on a report and I quietly walk up and knock on the door even though it's open so I don't scare him because he was so intent on what he was writing. "Gabby! What can I do for you kid?" He asks. He takes a look at me and sees I am somewhat upset when I don't start talking at first. He walks over, grabs my hand and pulls me into the office closing the door and guides me to the chair at his desk he was just sitting at and gently encourages me to sit down. He leans against the closed door and says "Talk to me." I loose it, tears start rolling down my face, I can't speak. He used the one phrase that Matt would say to me all the time when I was upset. Hermann walks over and squats down in front of me and grabs my hands and said "Gabby, you can tell me anything, I hate seeing you in tears and this upset." He hands me a Kleenex and I blow my nose and wipe away the tears. I was just about to open my mouth to blurt out that I am pregnant when the bells go off calling Truck 81, Ambulance 61 and Squad 3 to a fire. He looks at me and asks if I am ok for the call, I nod my head and we both run out of his office to the truck.
The ride to the fire was quiet, the guys could tell I wasn't in the best mood and suspected I had been crying so they left me alone. As soon as we got on the scene Hermann yells Dawson you are on my hip for this one, it's really rolling. I nod and think to myself what am I doing, I can't go into this fire, not after finding out I am pregnant. The heat is to dangerous for my unborn child. We are almost to the entrance of the building when I look at Hermann and say "I can't!" And turn and run back to the truck. I see Otis and tell him to go with Hermann, I am not feeling good. I watched from the sidelines with Chief Pridgett getting the side eye from him from time to time. After a couple hours the fire was out and we packed up the truck and headed back to the fire house. As soon as the truck stopped and everyone got out Hermann yelled "Dawson my office now!" Shit I thought to myself just as I noticed the Chief walking toward Hermann. I knew he was going to question my actions and he needed to defend them without getting himself in trouble.
I am sitting in Hermann's office waiting for him when the door opens up and he looks me directly in the eyes and says "How far along are you Gabby and does Casey know about the baby?" I stare at him with my mouth open and nothing comes out. I finally find my voice after a minute and say I am at least 3 – 4 moths along. I just found out last night, I had Otis cover and close for me and I went on to tell him about my evening with Brett. He walked over to me gave me a big hug and said "Congratulations this make me like an honorary grandpa right?" I smiled and said "Of course!" He then said so… "You never did answer my second question, Does Casey know." I knew at that point I couldn't keep something like this from him and said "No, I haven't had a chance, I just found out less than 12 hours ago myself. I want to make an appointment to see my OBGYN, find out for sure how far along I am, then I will reach out to Matt. I believe he deserves to know, even if he has been an ass to me and everyone else here these past few months." I sit there as Hermann shakes his head in agreement with me, and I said "What about my job, what do we do? I am afraid of going to Chief Pridgett and how he will handle it. I am thinking I want a desk job here at 51 if we can figure something out, maybe Connie will want to retire." I half joke and half hope she really would. "Don't get your hopes up on that one kid, maybe we should talk to Severide and get his take on it. He's been a lieutenant way longer than me." I shake my head in agreement and Hermann turns and walks out of his office to go find Kelly and I stay and wait in his office.
I am waiting for Kelly and Hermann to come back, I am thinking about how I will tell Kelly. I know that Matt bringing Beth to their apartment and then she moved in once her divorce was final from the Chief a couple weeks later had Kelly looking for a new place to live. He was tired of Beth being around, from the moment he had his first conversation with her, He knew he wasn't going to like her. Beth was very clingy to Matt to the point of being possessive of him. Kelly once told me that he asked if they could have a guys night out at the bar and Matt said Beth probably wouldn't let him. She usually had plans to hangout with her friends already in the works. She alienated Matt from his friends at 51. He even never went into Molly's anymore, which if I was honest was glad because I really don't think I was ready for Matt to be hugging and kissing someone else right in front of me. It still hurt thinking that he chose a women over his job as lieutenant of Truck 81. He wouldn't do that for me, he insisted that if anyone left 51 it had to be me for our relationship to work. Just then I hear the door open up and Kelly and Hermann walk in and I turn and look at them and I blurted out in on long breath "I'm pregnant and yes it's Matts, No I haven't told him yet, I just found out less than 12 hours ago and I want to make an appointment to see my OBGYN first before I try to get in touch with him." The room is silent for a minute and Kelly says "First off congratulations mama! I am so excited for you and second, what are we going to do about your job? Chief Pridgett can't find out that Casey is the dad, because he will make your life a living hell Dawson. I don't want to see that happen. Let's first get through this shift, Hermann will make sure you don't go into burning buildings, maybe have Otis train her on elevators and the aerial, use that as the excuse for the next couple of shifts. Hermann and I will go talk to Boden and see what we can figure out with him, before Pridgett knows." I am sure once the rest of the house knows about the baby and Casey being the dad, they will keep it from Pridgett as well since we are all on the same page counting down the days for Boden return back to 51." I stand up and hug Kelly thanking him for being the next best thing to Shay. He smiles "She would be so happy for you right now and I am sure she would kick Casey's ass for it getting this far as well!" That made me smile and really laugh as I sat and pictured her giving Matt a piece of her mind on how she is treating her best friend. I hugged Kelly and Hermann again and we all say how much we miss our little blond fire cracker.
We all walk out of the office into the common room and I start making brunch since we all missed breakfast and it was nearing lunch time. I felt so much better after talking to Hermann and Severide. The rest of the day was pretty quiet with only a couple of calls for Truck which were minor traffic accidents that I was able to assist on without anyone questioning my actions. I was even able to squeeze in a call to my OB setting up an appointment for 8:30 am tomorrow morning right after shift.
After dinner I was sitting on my bunk on my iPad looking at the latest pregnancy websites learning what the next 4 – 5 months were going to be like for me when I felt the edge of my bed dip down as someone sat on the edge of my bed. "Gabby I know you have a lot running through your head, but do you know where you are going to live since living with Sylvie was suppose to be for a month or two and she wasn't planning on having a baby as a roommate too?" Kelly went on to tell me he was working with a realtor looking at townhouses to buy. He said he would be willing to have a roommate with a baby on way if she would be interested. He reached for my iPad searched the MLS listings until he found a beautiful townhouse he saw the other day that had 3 bedrooms 2 bathrooms and a small side yard close to 51. Looking at the pictures I was in love with it already. I looked at him and said "You are serious aren't you?" "Dead serious, I need to get out of Matts apartment, Beth is driving me nuts, I feel like I sleep at women's places I pick up at the bar just so I don't have to be home with her at the same time." With a deep sigh he continued by saying "The other day I caught her going through Matts phone and when I questioned her about it she got all defensive saying that he was her boyfriend and to mind my own business. I never told Matt, I should have, but I can never get him alone without her being right there. It's odd and creepy how she is. I don't understand how Matt doesn't see it. Whenever I bring up your name Beth gets really mad, you can tell, because she turns this funny shade of red and starts talking talking funny and gets really pissed off.. I do it now to piss her off more than anything. Then she runs to Matt and complains about how mean I am. I laugh when they are fighting about me when I am in my room. He defends me and she gets loud and starts yelling. I don't see what he see in her." Kelly looks over at me see my sad face and says "Sorry Gabs I shouldn't be telling you this stuff." "No it's okay, it hurts but it is kind of funny! You are a great friend Kelly and I appreciate you offering to be roomies. I will totally move in with you if you are 100% sure. I will be coming with baggage you know." Of course I am sure, anything for you. If Shay was still here, you would already be living with us anyway if this happened right?" I reached up and gave Kelly a hug and thanked him, then I looked at him and said, "Will you go with me to my first OB appointment tomorrow after shift?" I could use a friend to be with me, I am sure they will do an ultrasound to find out how far along I am and to give me my due date? What do you say roomie? Will you be my new Shay?" Smiling Kelly said "How can I say no to that, I would love to go with you Gabs!"
Now that I knew Kelly was going to go with me tomorrow, it made me feel a lot better. I was able to get a good night sleep because we were lucky and didn't have any calls throughout the night, which is very rare for our busy firehouse. I got up when everyone else was waking up, made my bed quickly and grabbed my overnight bag and walked to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth, fixed my ponytail and touched up my makeup. Just in time to grab a bagel and find Kelly in the common room. I walked out and asked him if he was ready to go. He grabbed my hand and said lets do this.
Thank you for reading my first chapter. Let me know what you think. Thanks Em