AN: This is a massive, by my standards, one shot. It's going to be darker than is average for this fandom. It's going to get weird, and sad, and it's hopefully going to make a terrible sort of sense. All that being said? I stand by my general philosophy about writing fanfiction. Always be as original as the other person's sandbox allows, find a new angle, chase it. This is certainly different from most anything else I've come across in the Naruto fandom.
If you like the concept and want to put your own spin on it, more characters, family, actually drawing it out into a full fic? Feel free, just let me know so I can read it! ^^
I don't own Naruto, I'm not making any money writing this. Hope you enjoy.
Naruto stumbled back into his apartment around one in the morning. He was tired, filthy, and emotionally exhausted. The strange feel of the forehead protector tied around his head felt like an empty accomplishment. Naruto pulled it off before dropping face first onto his bed.
He graduated, he had earned Iruka's… what exactly? Respect? Acknowledgment? Support? Affection?
Did it even matter?
Classes were over. In a week, he'd be placed on a team, and Iruka would go on to teach the next class of genin hopefuls.
Naruto would be alone again. And even if that wasn't the case, what kind of role would Iruka even fit into? He was too old to be Naruto's friend. He'd never had any of those before.
Loneliness ate at the young blond as he tried to find sleep. He just wanted a friend. Someone his own age. Someone who wouldn't care about the stupid fox. Someone who would acknowledge him. Just one person his own age.
With a groan Naruto rolled onto his side resigned to a night of tossing and turning before sleep would hopefully find him.
{}{}{}{}
The pang of loneliness in Naruto's chest seemed to grow as he watched Konohamaru race off. The little brat had been a balm to his pain all day. Once again Naruto found someone who accepted him! But wouldn't be around often, if at all.
For a few hours, it had been like having a younger brother, and Naruto had loved it. Now the brat was gone and Naruto felt all the more lonely for his absence.
Sure, he got a new kickass move out of everything, but it's not like he could make friends with a Naruko clone!
Naruto stopped dead in the middle of the street. It earned him even more annoyed and angry glances than usual. Naruto just ignored those.
He could henge his clones, his solid clones. It's not like he didn't know how to act. He had to be able to act a part for any of his pranks involving the henge to work. It, it would be like having an imaginary friend, but real!
Naruto trembled lightly where he stood. He could finally have friends, made up, pretend, imaginary friends… but, friends.
Inside the young boy a war raged. Just the thought of it felt like quitting, like giving up on ever having real friends. But this was his chance to finally have a friend, hell to have as many friends as he wanted!
Finally, Naruto shook his head. He would be assigned to a team in a couple of days. He would just make friends with his teammates. He wouldn't, couldn't, just give up hope!
{}{}{}{}
They left him. After all that talk about teamwork and never leaving a comrade behind they left him tied to a post, out in the sun, in the middle of the day.
Maybe Kakashi was one of those people who hated him because of the fox? Just subtler and more patient about it than the rest?
And his teammates! Sure, Sakura and Sasuke had been, well, their normal brand of abusive and dismissive… but she'd offered to feed him at the end! He'd thought, he'd hoped… but no. She forgot about him just as soon as Kakashi said they passed.
They weren't friends. Probably would never be friends at this rate.
Naruto struggled to move his hands and to fight back tears. The loneliness was like an all-consuming pit. It stung and burned and clawed at him. With a final jerk that rubbed the skin on his wrists raw enough to bleed a bit he managed to bring his hands together.
"Sh-shadow clone jutsu." The blond choked out. His eyes shut and head bowed. The single poofing sound and the drain on his chakra told him the technique worked… but then nothing. The ropes weren't cut. Instead another poofing sound. Naruto looked up to see smoke dissipating around a girl only an inch taller than himself. She wore a light green shirt, and dark brown pants.
She had brown hair that fell just past her shoulders, with bangs that framed her heart shaped face. Her eyes were a warm, light brown color that reminded Naruto of stained wood. Those eyes were fixed on Naruto and showed nothing but concern.
Concerned about him! Naruto's heart ached and leapt all at once.
"H-hey." She called tentatively. "Boss-er boy! I meant boy! Are, are you okay?"
Clone. Henged clone. Henged clone trying to cheer him up by pretending to be some civilian girl.
Fuck it. Naruto thought. Dignity is for people who aren't hated for waking up in the morning.
"Ahh, I could really use a hand if you don't mind?" He admitted sheepishly.
"Of course!" The clone rushed over. "Ahh! You're bleeding!"
Naruto glanced down at his raw wrists and felt a brief surge of warmth. Was this what it felt like to have someone worry about him?
"It's not too bad, and I heal really quick. Could you please untie me though?" Naruto asked giving his best puppy dog eyes. With a nod, the clone moved forward and started working on the knots.
"Why are you tied up anyway?" The clone asked, playing up the angle of a civilian rather than a clone who knew this already.
"...My teammates suck."
"I'm sorry?" The clone asked looking confused.
"Why? It's not your fault they're jerks?" The clone giggled a bit, trying to stay in character of a young girl.
"No, silly. I mean, what makes you say that about them?" The clone said giving Naruto a small smile. Naruto blushed and looked away.
"Oh, yeah, I knew that!" The clone gave him a flat disbelieving look. Naruto chuckled a bit, sheepishly. "My sensei tied me up for some dumb reason… then they all forgot about me when they left."
"That's terrible!"
"I know, right?!" The clone huffed.
"Of all the… Can you get on a different team?" Naruto snorted.
"Not likely… I was lucky to even get on a team." Naruto said as he slumped down a bit
"Huh, what do you mean?"
"I'm not a very good student." Naruto muttered quietly looking at his feet. "I was at the very bottom of my class. Doesn't help that most of the village hates me either."
"Why would they hate you?" The clone grunted as it tugged on a particularly tight knot.
Naruto wanted to look away. He wanted to deflect the question… but this was a clone even if it was acting like a civilian to cheer him up it wouldn't suddenly act like it hated him. Besides he wanted to tell someone. To talk it through like he had seen other people do with their friends when they had a problem.
So, Naruto talked as the clone untied him. And once he was untied they both moved to the shade of a tree and Naruto continued to rant.
He talked about being kicked out of stores, and sold crap goods. He talked about being ignored or hated by the adults who all told their children to stay away from him.
He talked about his team. How he could almost understand Sasuke but hated the fact he was adored by the village and just rejected them all. He talked about how he kept trying to get on Sakura's good side by calling her pretty and asking her on dates when she got rejected by Sasuke… and how frustrated he was that all he got for his efforts were ringing ears and bumps on his head.
He talked about how he had finally won over one of his teachers… just in time to leave the man behind.
With a final sigh Naruto leaned back against the trunk of a tree and rubbed at his eyes to hide how red they were becoming and brush away a few faint traces of water.
The sensation of arms wrapping around him tightly, and the feel of another body pulled flush against his side made Naruto freeze up. Glancing over he saw the clone with its head buried in his shoulder hugging him.
"Wh-what?"
"You needed a hug." Was the clone's blunt factual response. It was all the prompting Naruto needed to sink into and return the hug.
As the two slowly disengaged from each other both looking sheepish a thought struck Naruto. He wanted to do this again. He wanted to be able to call up a clone and henge it into this wonderful accepting person again.
"Thank you for listening to me. I really needed to get that off my chest." He chuckled sheepishly. "What's your name? I'd like to talk to you again sometime."
The clone blinked in surprise obviously thrown off before it slipped back into character giving the original a warm smile.
"I'm," the clone faltered for a moment trying to think of a name. Then glanced at her creator and felt inspiration strike. "Kyoko." Mirror, a fitting name for a clone. "And I'd be happy to meet you again sometime." The clone smiled. "But it's getting late, and we should both head home."
"Naruto." The blond finally, and needlessly introduced himself. "I'll see you around Kyoko-chan." He said with a wave before running off back to his apartment, a true smile on his lips.
{}{}{}{}
Naruto had resisted the urge to summon a clone henged like Kyoko for almost a week before he gave in to temptation.
Chores disguised as missions, teamwork exercises that all resulted in grudging cooperation only for the group to scatter the moment they were dismissed, and a teacher who did not teach had worn his patience down to nothing.
So what if it was weird to talk to clones of himself. Not like anyone else would talk to him anyway.
"Kyoko-chan!" Naruto shouted in fake surprise, a smile splitting his face as he opened the door for the now henged clone he had sent out a few minutes ago.
"Naruto, how are you doing?" The clone gave its creator a small smile. Sure, this was a bit weird and the clone already knew all the things the boss could talk about, but for just the few minutes it had been henged as Kyoko no one had glared at the clone. Not only that but the clone was for all intent and purpose Naruto. It suffered from the same loneliness as its creator and relished the fact that it's presence was wanted, was needed, for once. So the clone slipped into its role gladly and with a smile on its lips.
And they talked.
Naruto bemoaned his lot in life and the missions he had been given. The clone lent a sympathetic ear and offered support. Eventually Naruto ran out of things to talk about and a comfortable silence settled. But Naruto and his clone were both not content to sit in silence. Silence had always been associated with loneliness. Even comfortable silence with another present seemed wrong to them. So Naruto reached for what little he knew about polite conversation.
"What about you, Kyoko? What's your life like."
The clone almost jumped in surprise as it put their carefully honed skill of bullshiting people to work.
"Oh, nothing really special. My folks are traders so were in and out of Konoha all the time." The clone bluffed thinking up a story that would explain any long absences for times Naruto couldn't get away with this game of make believe. "It's nice to see lots of different places, but I don't really get to make many friends." The clone continued spinning the lie. "Moving around so much can make that a bit difficult you know."
Of course, neither Naruto or the clone had any idea if this was true or not, but then it didn't really matter. It made sense to them and they were the only ones it would matter too.
"Let's get something to eat!" The clone declared standing up quickly. Changing the topic to avoid any need to further make things up.
"Sure!" Naruto declared with a smile. "Let's go to Ichiraku for some ramen. It's the best."
The clone almost agreed instantly but swallowed down that gut reaction. It was supposed to be someone else. It shouldn't have the same favorite food as the original that would be too unlikely. Especially for something like ramen which most people considered junk food.
"Actually, I was hoping to get some dango." Naruto almost tripped hearing that from his clone before he caught onto what it was doing.
"Ah, you know that sounds nice, but uhh… well, I don't think they'll serve me… or you if you're with me." The blond grumbled under his breath while looking away.
The clone frowned in thought as it considered that, and reluctantly admitted it was probably true. Still the clone wouldn't let such a good day be ruined by bastard shop owners. A wicked little grin split the clones face.
"Just henge into a smaller looking me, change a few things too." Naruto's confused look prompted the clone to giggle like they had seen other girls do. "I want to go buy some dango for me and my little sister Naru." Its smile was all sugar and spice and made Naruto shiver in slight fear before grinning back at the clone and doing as instructed. Giggling and laughing the pair ran from the apartment.
{}{}{}{}
Naruto shut his door and slid down it until his head rested on his knees. Barely even thinking about it he made the hand sign and summoned a shadow clone who henged into Kyoko. It took only a moment for the clone to be down on the floor next to him hugging him tight.
There was no need for words. Not now. Naruto had done his best to hold it together through the mission, but now safe at home, and away from the judgmental eyes of his team... he wanted, needed, comfort.
This was what it meant to be a ninja. To risk death, to deal out death, to watch people who deserved better die; to cut down those who stood in your way. For good or evil, they had to fulfill their missions. They could just as easily have been hired to destroy the bridge and kill Tazuna!
Naruto let out a little sob as he grabbed onto his clone. To Kyoko. He needed someone to cling to, he needed her support. The hell had he wanted to be a ninja for in the first place for anyway? To be Hokage? Ha! A means to an end. He wanted this! He wanted someone like Kyoko in his life he wanted people who would accept him!
And how was that working out for him? The Hokage who treated him like a grandson, a kid who looked up to him, and an old teacher who accepted him. A pair of teammates who tolerated him?
Naruto let out a choked laugh at it all. He still wanted to be a ninja. He still wanted to earn people's respect. To protect what was important to him. But the reality of his chosen path was a harsh wake up call for the thirteen-year-old. His bold words and claims were no less true; he would be a great ninja, maybe even Hokage if he could manage it, but the dream was tainted now, poisoned by the first touch of the truth.
By the same token though wave had been validation. He had protected the people, and they had acknowledged him for it. If he kept moving forward maybe someday his own village would feel the same?
Kyoko made calming noises and murmured comforting words as she rubbed his back. Naruto clung to her all the tighter. He would get stronger. He would claw his way to the top. Because getting there would mean more people like Kyoko; more people who accepted him. Real people who accepted him. But until then, he needed Kyoko.
She was all he had.
{}{}{}{}
Naruto settled into a loose schedule. Every three to five days, Naruto and Kyoka would hang out in the evening after Naruto finished his training or missions. Sometimes they would go out under henge and get something to eat at a restaurant that would normally turn the blond away. Sometimes they stayed at Naruto's apartment and played board games, or cards. Often, they talked, but slowly they both learned to accept and enjoy the quiet moments when they would run out of things to talk about. The silence became less intimidating and more calming.
{}{}{}{}
"You're going to enter. Aren't you?" It wasn't really a question. They both knew he would. How could he not? It was the next step towards achieving his dream.
"Yeah." Naruto responded as he poked at his meal. It wasn't ramen, and he wasn't feeling all that hungry anyway.
"It's going to be dangerous." Naruto just nodded. He was worried. He wouldn't let it show in front of his team but he was worried. Nothing was certain. Even so he couldn't back down.
"Just promises me to stay safe, and come back in one piece."
Naruto nodded and pulled his friend into a hug. He had to come back now. Someone wanted him to be safe and come back to them. A few silent tears rolled down his face from the joy that small sentiment brought him. He didn't care. It was alright to cry when you were happy, and Kyoko wouldn't judge him for it.
{}{}{}{}
When Naruto finally managed to stumble back into his apartment Kyoko was already waiting for him. Naruto had to blink back confusion. He didn't even remember summoning a clone. Had he forgotten, or had the Kyoko clone from a week ago never dispelled? But then what had she been doing for just over a week?
Her eyes snapped up and locked onto him as soon as he opened the door.
"Tell me everything." It was not a request, or a demand so much as a statement of what was about to happen. Kami help him if things did not conform to said statement.
So even as tired as he was Naruto pulled out a chair and started to talk.
Kyoko giggled when he explained how he stumbled his way through the first exam without answering a single question.
She latched onto him and started looking him over for injuries when he told her about the giant snake. She nearly broke his hand with her grip as he described the fight against Orochimaru.
…She also fell out of her seat laughing and pointing at him when he explained that he defeated Kiba with a fart.
She grunted angrily when he explained how Kakashi had pushed him off on a subpar instructor in order to focus on Sasuke.
"You always seem to find trouble, Naruto." She murmured as she pulled him into a hug. "And you never seem to get the help you really need." Naruto nodded into her shoulder and tightened his hug.
"I know but I'll get by. I always do."
Neither said anything further and eventually Naruto slipped off to sleep.
{}{}{}{}
"If you turn into a pervert, I will hurt you. Clear?" Kyoko said while glaring at Naruto after he explained about his new teacher and the weird turn his day had taken.
The blond paled and nodded furiously. Jiraiya might be growing on him… like a fungus that refused to be removed. But the man wasn't much of a teacher. At best he was working his way up to eccentric uncle. But it was far too soon to actually consider him as such, and even if he did make it to honorary uncle Naruto would still rather have a friend in his life. Would need to have a friend in his life. The pervy sage couldn't replace Kyoko if he tried.
{}{}{}{}
The click of Jiraiya's odd sandals caused Kyoko to spin and meet the man as he approached.
"I've seen you go in and out of the Brats apartment."
Kyoko waited for Jiraiya to make a point or ask a question, but he didn't seem inclined to do so.
"OK… and?"
"You're not a citizen of Konoha. No one has seen you enter or exit the village. No one knows anything about you except that you sometimes show up at different restaurants and food stands. Often with different kids, some your age and some younger. But almost never the same kid twice. If I had to guess the other kid is the Brat under a henge." The sage rattled off. "What I want to know is who you really are, and why I shouldn't be dragging you into T&I for interrogation about your attempt to subvert a Konoha shinobi." He finished with a harsh glare.
Kyoko glared right back.
"Attempting to subvert a Konoha shinobi, huh?" Her voice dripped with sarcasm. "No. You're just worried about the fact that the village weapon has a friend for the first time in his life, and it's not someone who will spoon feed him bullshit and patriotism." She outright snarled.
Jiraiya shifted into a subtle combat stance as Kyoko brought her hands together and dispelled the henge, causing Jiraiya to blink in confusion. Immediately the clone reapplied her henge.
"I'm a clone you jackass! Naruto can't make friends because everyone hates him, or looks down on him and insults him! I'm a freaking coping mechanism, a stopgap until he can earn enough respect from the idiots around here to make real friends." Her voice hitched ever so slightly at the thought of Naruto not needing her anymore. But she pushed it aside and carried on. "And I'm all he's got! So you, and everyone else, can just fuck off!"
Her peace said Kyoko stormed off to Naruto's apartment leaving the very confused and troubled sanin behind.
{}{}{}{}
"He's using a clone as an imaginary friend. I don't know if I should call that genius or insane!" Jiraiya ranted. The Hokage puffed on his pipe and considered the matter as he looked at his student over steepled fingers.
"It is, troubling… but not the most outlandish behavior we have ever seen from one of our ninja. It's also not hazardous to himself or others."
"Hazardous? No. Unhealthy…"
"Jiraiya, you spy on naked woman daily, invading their privacy, and, if they become aware of it, making them feel incredibly vulnerable and violated." The toad sage twitched. "Kakashi shows up to everything hours late and obsessively reads porn, in public." Jiraiya tried to protest that his books were not porn but the Hokage talked over him. "Tsunade drowns her grief in gambling and alcohol." Jiraiya had nothing to say to that.
"My son and I damage our lungs with tobacco and risk giving ourselves cancer. Orochimaru completely snapped and started treating the whole world as test subjects. And that's not even getting into the likes of Ibiki, Anko, and much as we might like to, let's not forget Guy."
"Alright, alright you made your point! But still this is-"
"It's unhealthy, it's odd, and it could potentially get worse." The old man admitted with a tired sigh.
"But it's not hurting anyone. It's probably helping Naruto to cope to some degree at least, and what do you want me to do? Order the boy to stop making clones? And all to take away his imaginary friend? I might as well try ordering Kakashi to give up porn, or Guy to stop wearing spandex. Oh they might listen, for a while, where someone who reports to me might see them. But I have no doubt they would go right back to doing what they pleased where I couldn't see them. As soon as they felt they could get away with it."
Jiraiya grimaced but couldn't really argue the point. More than once he'd been ordered to stop peaking on woman. It had never stopped him for long.
"Leave it alone for now, Jiraiya. Keep an eye on him by all means, but for now, leave it alone."
{}{}{}{}
Naruto and Kyoko sat in silence for a long time, not doing or saying anything.
"He was so messed up." Naruto finally spoke. "He just, hated everything, and everyone. It would have been so easy for me to end up exactly like him, like that. A few assassination attempts, my seal not being as strong as it is and, and." Naruto's breath hitched as he drew in a sharp shuddering breath. Kyoko held him tight and rubbed circles on his back.
"And now, Jiji's dead." Naruto managed to choke out before be started to cry. He cried for what could have been his fate. He cried for what someone so like himself had to endure. He cried for the loss of the closest thing to family he had ever know. Kyoko would spend most of the night murmuring reassurances and comforting words to her friend.
{}{}{}{}
"Granny Tsunade, huh?" Kyoko asked, arching an eyebrow. Naruto chuckled sheepishly.
"I guess so, she's… she's not so bad you know? Like yeah, she has issues but who doesn't? And…" Naruto trailed off not sure how to finish.
"And she acknowledged you." Kyoko finished, eyes sparkling as she leaned forward to flick the necklace around Naruto's neck. Naruto chuckled a bit sheepishly but couldn't hide his small warm smile.
"Yeah, yeah she did."
{}{}{}{}
Kyoko had been wandering the village for the better part of two days now. When she had said goodnight to Naruto she realized she still had plenty of chakra, and she wanted more things to talk about. She wanted to be able to contribute more to a conversation with Naruto than just a sympathetic ear.
After a night spent sleeping in a tree she had spent most of the day exploring the village. She talked to people, explored strange shops, learned a few things about fashion Naruto wouldn't care about but she found oddly interesting.
It had been fun. She had been looking forward to telling Naruto all about her adventures, and dragging him to the more interesting places.
Then after lunch at a particularly nice tea shop she started hearing rumors.
Sasuke had defected.
A team had been sent to retrieve him.
No ranking ninja had been available to send on the retrieval team.
The demon brat was on the retrieval team.
Never before had Kyoko ever known that Naruto was in danger while he was still in danger. For her it had always been after the fact. When she could be safe in the knowledge that he had survived.
What would even happen if he died?
Would she persist until she ran out of chakra and live to hear that the worst had happened?
Would she simply pop like a soap bubble the instant he died?
Which would even be worse? To die never even knowing that he didn't make it, or to know and then have to suffer with that knowledge until she too expired?
Just the thought made her shudder. She felt helpless and alone for the first time since… since this had all started back in the training field. It was almost this exact sensation that had spurned Naruto to create her in the first place. Only now it was back nipping at her heels again. And it was worse than ever before. The thought of losing Naruto hurt worse than the memories of just plane being alone.
It terrified her.
{}{}{}{}
They were back!
Kyoko ran through the streets, dodging in and out of the foot traffic as she made her way to the hospital. Naruto was alive! It still took the better part of twenty minutes to get all the way across town to the hospital and find Naruto's room.
Naruto was out cold and looked like death warmed over. Kyoko busied herself by looking over his chart. She was not at all amused by what she read.
{}{}{}{}
"Don't worry Sakura-chan, I'll get the teme back for you!"
"No, you will not!" Kyoko shouted from the chair she had dozed off in as Naruto's loud outburst woke her. Naruto sputtered shocked and Sakura nearly jumped out of her skin having not noticed the brunette before.
"Kyoko-chan, I, how, what are you doing here?!"
"Checking up on your stupid self! You, idiot! Do you know how worried I was about you! And after everything you want to run off and try and bring that lunatic back?!" Naruto's face went red, in anger and embarrassment. He didn't know how Kyoko was here, now. But to have her challenging him, demanding he give up on Sasuke…
"I made Sakura a promise of a lifetime that I would bring him back."
Kyoko stood from her chair and marched to the foot of the bed where she picked up his clipboard before tossing it into his lap.
"Then you're in luck." She said, her voice cold and hard. "Because you were clinically dead for two minutes and sixteen seconds. That promise expired the moment your heart stopped beating." Naruto and Sakura both paled as Kyoko's words hit home. "That bastard killed you because you were holding back trying to bring him in alive. Am I wrong?" Naruto could only shake his head.
"Then the next time you see him don't you dare hold back. He betrayed the village, he betrayed you. And even if I'm the only one, I want you back, and in one piece. Not dead in a ditch because you pulled your punches. Do you understand me?"
Naruto couldn't find his voice. Sasuke had actually killed him, and Kyoko would rather he come back alive and a killer than for him to die saving Sasuke. In the end, all the blond managed was a nod and a bit of a choked mumble.
It was enough for Kyoko. She dropped the angry look, and pulled the boy into a fierce hug.
Sakura didn't know who the brunette was, or how to feel about everything that happened. Instead of making a scene she quietly slipped out to find a place to think.
{}{}{}{}
Two months into Naruto's travels with Jiraiya Naruto found himself being left largely to his own devices for a few days as the Sannin took care of some "urgent business." Naruto wasn't sure if that meant writing more of his porn, or actual urgent business from the Hokage. It was hard to tell with Jiraiya.
Nevertheless, the blond decided to make the most of his freedom from the super pervert by exploring the small town they were camped out by and hopefully getting to know the locals. Those attempts had been… less than successful.
After six hours of being ignored and outright run from by the locals Naruto stormed off of the streets and into a small food stand that sold teriyaki skewers.
"An order of Chicken." The blond grumbled placing his money on the counter. The food was served quickly and Naruto absently thanked the owner as he bit into his lunch. Halfway through his second skewer the blond glanced up at the old man behind the counter. "Hey, do you have any idea why everyone in town keeps running away from me?"
The old man looked up in surprise. His face betrayed a bit of fear before he swallowed nervously and answered.
"Ah well, If I had to guess it's because of the headband, shinobi-san."
"Eh? You mean my forehead protector? What's that got to do with anything?"
"It tells everyone that you are a ninja. People are… cautious about ninja. Almost never see ninja around here, and it's usually only a few days after we do see one that we hear about a death in a nearby town or city. A few years back we had someone wind up dead, throat was slit, a week later we heard that there had been a ninja pass through the town north of here the day before."
Naruto stayed silent as he began to understand just what the old man was telling him.
"People are cautious, some are even afraid." The old man finished shrugging his shoulders as he gave the blond a nervous glance.
"Ah, thanks for explaining that to me." Naruto said a bit hollowly before placing a few more coins on the counter. "You don't need to worry about me though. I'm just passing through on a training trip away from my village. Keep the change old man, and have a nice day." Naruto called over his shoulder as he exited the stand and headed back towards camp on the outskirts of the village.
His steps were slow and his thoughts slower as he contemplated the reality that even outside Konoha he was still an outcast, still feared as a potential killing machine. Except outside the village people actually had a good reason to be afraid of him. It was going to be a lot harder to make friends out here than he had thought.
{}{}{}{}
Three months into his training trip and Jiraiya had vanished again for more "important business." Naruto decided that he wasn't up for another trip into an unfriendly town and simply made a mass of shadow clones to spar against.
Hidden from sight by the chaos of the brawling Naruto's one clone henged into Kyoko and quickly grabbed a pair of other clones to help her.
"Go hunting, fish could, work but rabbit would be better. I'm going to go looking for some herbs, maybe head into town for some vegetables." She directed the clones. With a shared glance and a shrug, the two clones took off in search of their objective. With a determined nod Kyoko did the same only heading towards town instead if farther into the woods.
When Naruto stumbled back into camp at the end of the day it was to the sight of a smiling Kyoko handing him a bowl of rabbit stew. The smile he gave her in return was blinding. The pair talked late into the night before the fire died down and Naruto, exhausted from training, fell asleep leaning against his friend.
{}{}{}{}
One year into training trip
"Kyoko-chan."
"Mm." The brunette hummed acknowledging her friend as she chopped a few carrots to add to the now common stew pot.
"There are days," Naruto paused looking unsure of himself. "There are days I don't remember that you're, well, you know."
Kyoko looked up, startled. Thinking back, she realized there were days she forgot as well.
"I, I should be worried that I'm going crazy, but I…"
"But what Naruto-kun?" The blond looked up at her with haunted eyes.
"I can't shake this, fear, that you're the only one I'm ever going to have. Even when I go back, even if I impress them all by being amazing, they never really knew me before, and I'll have been gone for years! They'll all have their own friends, their own groups. I just, how am I ever going to fit in with them when we've got almost no common ground?"
Kyoko didn't have a good answer for him. She turned back to the soup and thought as Naruto listlessly kicked at the dirt. As the last of the ingredients went into the pot Kyoko cleaned her hands and stood to hug the blond.
"You have me. You will always have me. If they can't see how wonderful you are, then it's their own loss."
Naruto gave a small sob as he buried his head into the crook of her neck, and the two held onto each other as tightly as they could. Naruto cherished the contact more dearly than water in the desert, silently reassuring himself that at least she would never leave him, that he would never truly be alone again.
Kyoko soaked up the attention and love the blond gave her like a sponge silently dreading that someday she would no longer be needed. She soaked it up, reveled in it, and cherished it for fear that it would one day no longer be hers.
{}{}{}{}
The day after Naruto's sixteenth birthday the blond made his way back to camp from town. His head was bowed and his eyes shadowed by his bangs.
"Hey kid! How was your night? I wasn't sure if she was your type or not but-" Jiraiya's sentence was cut off, almost literally, by the kunai flying through the space where his head had been only a moment before.
"You absolute, BASTARD!" Naruto's eyes glowed red and his pupils had turned to slits.
"What the hell, Gaki! This is the thanks I get? You're a real man now! You should be ecstatic!" The sannin only just managed to dodge out of the way of the boulder sized rasengan Naruto attempted to murder him with.
"I thought it was real you bastard!" Tears leaked from Naruto's still burning red eyes as the first chakra tail burst into existence behind him. "For the first time in my life I thought a person around my own age actually liked me for who I am! And when I woke up this morning and asked her if she wanted to get breakfast… she laughed and said I shouldn't get so clingy with whores!" As Naruto finished speaking a second and third tail burst into being.
Jiraiya paled both in realization of just how badly he had fucked up, and at the threat of a three tailed Naruto hell bent on revenge.
Moving fast Jiraiya managed to get a suppression seal on Naruto, locking away the chakra tails. But Naruto had expected it and used it as an opening to jam a kunai deep into the older man's shoulder.
The blond swayed on his feet. The suppression tags always left him feeling tired, but he wasn't anywhere near done venting yet. The Sannin had placed the one thing Naruto truly wanted right in front of his eyes, let him hold it close for one night… and then revealed that it had never been real in the first place. Naruto swore then and there, funny uncle figure or not, Jiraiya was going to pay.
Three shadow clones he had made on the walk over leapt from the trees hell bent on tearing out their pound of flesh from the sannin.
If Jiraiya was surprised it didn't show. Even with his injured arm he dispelled the first two with little trouble… only to curse as the third detonated a trio of explosive tags almost on top of him.
Burnt, smoking and bruised he still managed to land on his feet. And was promptly knocked off them as Naruto did his best 'dynamic entry' impersonation.
"Dammit, Naruto. I'm sorry, I didn't think you would-"
"You didn't think at all!" Naruto roared as he brought down a rasengan towards the sage's head. Jiraiya rolled out of the way and leapt back.
Cursing internally, he launched a salvo of hair senbon at his student to force some distance and fled into the forest. He couldn't reason with Naruto as he was now. The blond needed time for his temper to cool. And Jiraiya probably needed just as much time for his shoulder and burns to heal.
Naruto stood, huffing, puffing, and swaying, in the wrecked remains of camp. For a few seconds, he stood in silence as his mind clawed for balance. Finally, he screamed his wordless rage to the morning sky before slumping to the ground.
{}{}{}{}
Kyoko had spent the early evening looking around town for Naruto, but she had never been able to find him and wish him a happy birthday. In the end, she had to spend the night at an inn. She had been sleeping soundly until the feel of the fox's toxic chakra, heavy in the air even at what must have been a mile from Naruto's camp, jolted her awake.
In a panicked rush, she took off for the camp. Her panic spiked to even higher levels when, almost as soon as the fox's chakra appeared, it vanished. She ran, as fast as she could.
The camp was a mess. The telltale craters of rasengan and a field's worth of hair senbon ruined what had once been a beautiful glade. The only one among the wreckage was Naruto, looking lost and utterly broken.
"Naruto!" She bolted to his side skidding the last few feet on one knee so as to be level with the blond. "What happened? Are you alright? Where's the pervert?"
For a moment Naruto didn't respond, then quick as a snake his arms blurred forward and pulled her into a crushing hug. For an instant everything was still, then he started to sob.
Kyoko froze up for a moment in shock before returning the hug just as fiercely. She could think of only a few times when Naruto had cried like this. Both were moments when he had been dealing with something horribly traumatic. Realizing what being a ninja actually meant and the loss of his grandfather figure, combined with the harsh reality of what could have happened to him. For him to break down like this now was honestly terrifying to her.
It took only a few moments for Naruto's sobs to turn into choked chuckles. The sound was utterly humorless and broken. The laugh of someone teetering on the brink.
It terrified her more than anything she had ever heard before.
"You know, I thought, for one wonderful night, that I'd finally found someone else our age who liked me, for me. I thought she was a massive pervert because she insisted on dragging me to a hotel room."
Naruto gave another broken laugh and shook his head.
"I thought it was moving way too fast, but I couldn't tell her no." He laughed again this time more of a bark, genuine dark humor in his voice. "I didn't want her to change her mind about me, didn't want to give her any reason to second guess tacking in interest. I figured it was a quirk I could get used to as we got to know each other better." He voice was sad, and defeated, but there was still that edge of near hysterical wry humor.
"Of course, that was before I woke up this morning, and found out the only way any girl will take an interest in me is if Jiraiya fucking pays them!" Naruto nearly spat as his eyes took on a slight orange glow.
In that moment Kyoko was very much considering homicide. A less emotional part of her brain questioned why she was contemplating slitting the unnamed whore in question's throat before deep frying Jiraiya's bits and feeding them to him. That voice was ignored in favor of hugging Naruto all the tighter and desperately trying to think of something to say. Not that he gives her the chance.
"You're all I've got Kyoko-chan." He whispered. "You know all my secrets. You've seen me break down, like this... And you're still here, somehow. Somehow, despite everything, you still like me."
"Of course, I like you, you idiot." She cut in. "I don't care about the stupid fox, or you breaking down when life kicks you in balls." That got a choked laugh out of her friend. "I love you, idiot." The words sliped out of her mouth, and she realized only a moment later that she meant them.
Naruto pulled back and stared at her, eyes wide and filled with wonder, still a bit red from crying.
"You what?" It was barely a whisper, but she heard him anyway.
"I love you. You're my best friend. My only friend. And maybe I'm all you've got but that goes both ways. You're all I've got too!"
Naruto leaned forward slightly, but then glanced away nervously as if second guessing his actions. Deciding that thinking was overrated Kyoko slipped a hand around the back of Naruto's head tangling her fingers into his hair and pulled the blond into a kiss.
It was needy and demanding and the smell of his sweat and the lingering musk of sex from the night before made her hormones spike in pleasantly mind-numbing ways.
Naruto hesitated for only a moment before he returned her kiss with equal fervor. The two lost themselves in the pleasure and the need to reaffirm for themselves, and too each other that it was real, that they would not suddenly find themselves all alone.
It was quite some time before the haze of pleasure settled, and they separated panting, wide eyed, and oddly content.
"You really mean it? You really love me?"
"Of course I do, goof."
"... love you too." Kyoko huffed.
"Of course you do, goof." She answered with a teasing smile. Naruto snorted, which set her to giggling, and before they could stop the both of them were collapsed against each other laughing.
{}{}{}{}
Six months later.
"Common, Kyoko-chan! I want to see what's changed while we've been gone!" Kyoko laughed brightly.
"I'm coming, Naruto-kun. No need to rush, the village isn't going anywhere."
"Actually, were really supposed to-"
"Fuck off, Ero-teme!" The couple shouted in stereo before running off into the village leaving the dejected sannin behind.
{}{}{}{}
"Jiraiya, please explain to me why Naruto is going around the village on a date... With what you assured me was an imaginary friend he would have moved on from long before you came back." Tsunade said evenly through her gritted teeth.
The sage fidgeted knowing this would not be a pleasant conversation.
"He's a ninja, were not exactly well liked outside of our own villages. Honestly, he ended up just as isolated from people his own age out there as he ever was here."
"So instead of moving on, he fell back on her even harder?"
"Yeah. Six months back I was running out of ideas and getting desperate. I upped the ante, took a big gamble and it backfired. They've been joined at the hip since then. They either won't acknowledge or can't remember that she's just a clone any more. Even popping her didn't break through to him. He also, pretty much hates me now." Jiraiya sighed as he slumped back into his seat.
"I'll set him up to talk to a Yamanaka."
"Good, maybe they'll have more luck than I did."
{}{}{}{}
"What did you find, Inoichi?" The Hokage asked after the blond man entered her office.
"It was, a singularly unique experience." He deflected.
"Explain, now." Inoichi winced before nodding.
"We started by destroying the clone, then entering Naruto's mind. It was, not what we expected. Naruto has developed, or perhaps self-inflicted, split personality disorder, and he channels the split personality into a shadow clone."
"What?! How?" Inoichi winced at the Hokage's volume.
"The Shadow clone jutsu returns the clone's memories to the original. Naruto has had a clone acting the role of Kyoko for years now. Those memories, rather than being integrated into his own, have been building up separate from his own. Then a few months ago Naruto suffered an extreme blow to his self-worth. Jiraiya's attempt to draw him out of his delusion instead was the final push to permanently cement not only Kyoko's identity as an individual, but also his belief that she was the only person his own age who would ever, could ever, care for him. That was the final push for his mind to decide she was never a clone, and was in fact, always real."
"Can you snap him out of it? Erase the memory of her? Hell can you kill her?" Inoichi hesitated.
"Getting rid of the split personality would be possible with some of my clans techniques. I would normally even recommend it, but not in this case."
"Why?" Tsunade grit out her frustration with the situation steadily rising.
"She's the only positive influence in his life at present. If she were 'killed' it's highly likely Naruto would fall into depression, perhaps even becoming suicidal. Erasing his memories of her along with killing the personality would be even worse that would be thousands of hours or more I would have to carefully edit, spread out over years, and it's possible a smell or taste could break through and trigger the memories. If that ever happened…" Inoichi shook his head not quite sure how badly it might go over.
"I might, with a lot of work eventually be able to make him realize Kyoko is just a henged shadow clone, but I'm not optimistic."
"So that's it. He's just going to…" Tsunade bit down on her frustration not even knowing what to say.
"I'm sorry, Hokage-sama. I'll do the best I can but…"
"Dismissed, Inoichi."
{}{}{}{}
"You know it was a nice touch, throwing yourself between me and Pain like that." Hinata jerked up in her hospital bed at the sound of Naruto's voice. "Maybe not the best time to try and get me away from Kyoko-chan, but I'm sure the Hokage will appreciate the risk you took trying to sell the act." Naruto spoke with a casual disinterest.
"What? But I"
"Seriously just drop the act. It's obvious you're under orders to try and get me away from Kyoko-chan. A village asset like a Jinchuriki needs minders and things to tie them to the village. Kyoko-chan could care less where we are so long as we're together, and that's got the brass worried." Naruto snorted. "But hey, cheer up! Yeah you failed your mission but that was never going to work anyway. At least now you're free to go after whoever you like!" Naruto stood and threw a casual wave over his shoulder. "No hard feelings, Hinata. See ya around."
{}{}{}{}
Naruto never went on to become Hokage. The note in his confidential mental health file always prevented it. The blond never let it get to him though.
He had Kyoko.
That was enough for him.
Read and Review