Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Kingom Hearts or Final Fantasy characters or anything from them.

Okay, I have to warn you that this may upset some people. It deals with depression and suicide. If you think this is stupid, then go ahead and flame it. It doesn't bother me. Please R&R. Thanks.

Kairi sat there, writing in her journal. After the day when she and Sora parted when the island separated she had believed that Sora would come back for her. She sat there writing, more like scribbling. The words on previous pages were mostly smudged. Her eyes had leaked tears of anger, sadness, hatred and disappointment.

One of the readable entries from months ago reads:

I still believe Sora will come back for me, no matter what people say. He told me he would! What reason do I have to not believe him? It's been two weeks since we were separated once again.

Does he really want to wield the keyblade more than he wants to see me? Did he maybe forget about me? No, he wouldn't, couldn't do that. I really wish he was here with me. This island has been infested with heartless. Maybe if he won't come back for me, he'll come back to get rid of the heartless.

What am I saying? Of course he'll come back. No questions asked! It's only been two weeks.

Now

Shows how desperate I was to have him here. I was told that I was being 'selfish'. How was I being selfish? He was the one that said he'd come back! And I was the foolish one. He will never come back. He probably found someone better than me. (Tear splatter) I believed him? He lied to my face and I believed him!

I must sound crazy; well I'm not. I used to be crazy, not the kind of crazy people might think of. I was crazy in love, but not anymore. I won't shed another tear over him. He's not worth it. Well, that's what I've been told. 'He's not worth crying over.' Though I've also been told by Tidus that he'd come back for me. Obviously Tidus wasn't right.

Kairi dropped her pen and stared out the window. The sky was dark from the darkened hearts if the inhabitants of the island. Ever since the heartless had taken over, people had lost their confidence, strength, hope and their hearts. Kairi had lost all hope as well, but it wasn't because of the heartless, it was all his fault, Sora's fault.

Kairi blinked a couple of times and then slid off her chair. She had stopped fighting off the heartless so that Sora would come back. She wasn't sure whether she should resume fighting them because she didn't care anymore, or if she should leave them in hopes that he would come back.

She was tired of being here where nothing would happen and where she had no friends. She thought it was different here. There were people her age here with similar dreams and they liked her for who she was. There was no reason to stay here anymore. Her friends weren't on the island anymore. And the ones that were, are dead now. That's right. Selphie, Wakka and Tidus all were killed by the heartless. Their hearts consumed by the shadows.

Why she hadn't fallen through the darkness yet was a mystery to her. Maybe it was because her heart had become stone cold, or they were waiting for something to happen. She didn't know, and she didn't care. They could swallow her up right now if they wished, and she wouldn't care.

Over the last months, Kairi had figured out ways to call the heartless. There were a few. They came to fear; it was like they smelled it. Once they had your scent, it would take days for the to stop trying to trace you. They had a leader, though she had yet to find it.

Another is they are attracted to blood. They come in large packs, like hungry sharks discovering a new corpse in their guarded pool. She had seen the heartless swarm too Selphie when she slit her wrists; deeply depressed by the deaths of Tidus and Wakka. She had thought she was alone, she had forgotten Kairi was here.

Kairi was now left here, but not alone. She was never alone. The heartless were always around. It had started as just the small ones, the ones that were almost cute and they could sink into the floor and sneak up behind you. Now it wasn't just them. They had evolved into much worse. She used to be scared of them, but no more. She feared nothing, because nothing was worse than what she was experiencing.

She picked up her pen off the ground and she sat back in her chair. She took out the last of the paper she had left. She had written many letters to Sora, but she'd never sent them. She always forgot she didn't know where to send it. The paper was plain white. Same with the envelope.

She wrote this:

Dearest Sora,

I waited for you; you never came back. Well, I guess either you came back finally or someone found this letter and gave it to you. It definitely wasn't sent. I just wanted to tell you how much I hate you. I despise you for what you put us through. It was worse than torture and death together.

Actually, death would be relief right now. Selphie was consumed by the darkness in sadness. Wakka and Tidus died fighting the heartless without you. Just think of what might not have happened had you been here. Of course not, because you don't care. You say you do? Why weren't you here?

Where were you to stop the skies from becoming black from the shadows, and the sea from becoming red with blood? Where were you to stop me from doing what I am going to do? What was I going to do? I'm sure you have an imagination. What I did was all because of you. You thought you were a hero, saving the world and all. What do you think happens when someone takes away your world?

Yours until the end,

Kairi

Kairi read over the letter. She almost shed a tear thinking about what she was going to do, but stopped. She told herself she wasn't going to cry. She walked over to her bed and pulled a knife out from under her pillow. She cut along the top of her finger and wiped it on the letter.

She took the knife and slid it along her hand, almost enjoying the pain; the closeness to death. She put the letter into the envelope and wrote Sora on it neatly. She brushed out her hair so it was soft. She already saw the heartless coming for her out the window. She put the letter under the door so Sora would see it before he came in to find it empty.

Kairi forgot why she hated Sora for a few moments. All she wanted was for him to hold her and tell her everything was alright. That Selphie, Tidus and Wakka were still outside playing. A tear slid down her cheek, but she knocked it away. She would not cry! There was a light coming to the building. There were footsteps and they stopped.

There was a muffled yell and then silence. There was blood that flowed under the door. She opened it and there was her Sora. The Sora she loved yet despised so. She knelt down and ran her fingers through his hair. His hand clenched her note.

She would allow herself to cry this time. She let the tears flow freely as the heartless devoured her heart. She held Sora's hand the whole time. He was there this time, but it was too late. Nothing would save them, there was no hero anymore. Her world was gone, Sora was gone.

She fell into the dark and didn't see the light. Instead she saw something else. There was Sora running towards her with a smile. He held out his hands and hugged her. Was this real? She looked at Sora and smiled. She was finally happy. She was with Sora. The sky wasn't black anymore, but bright blue. The water wasn't red anymore, but clear and green-blue. The fish filled the water. A crystal tear slid down her cheek. Not in sadness, but happy. She had her world back.

It is kind of sad, R&R if you want. I don't care if they're flames or critiques or whatever. Hope you thought it was... a good story.