Prompt: What if things had gone the opposite way at the end of season one? What if Simmons had forced Fitz to use the oxygen for himself? What if she had gone without and suffered brain damage? How would she react? How would Fitz treat her?
She shouldn't have done it. He was supposed to be the one. He was supposed to die down there and she was supposed to live a long, healthy life. But, after he hit the defibrillator button, she pushed the oxygen mask to his face and released the burst into his lungs. Nine days later, she was still in a coma and all he could do was worry and fret and wonder if she would ever be the same, sweet, wonderful bio-chemist she was before this mess. But the chances of that slipped away a little with each day that she remained unconscious.
"Fitz?"
The engineer looked up to see Skye looking at him with concern. They were in the mess hall of the "Playground" base. Fitz had a tray full of food in front of him, cold and untouched. Skye's tray was all but empty.
"did…did I zone out again?" he asked her.
She nodded, a sad smile on her face.
"Fitz, Simmons is going to be alright. The doctors said her brain activity is increasing every day. She'll be awake any day now." she encouraged.
Fitz sighed and nodded, trying to give Skye a convincing smile.
"I know. Any day." he agreed.
He picked a piece of bread off his tray and held it in his teeth while he cleared his place. Speaking of Simmons, he needed to get back to her. She was probably wondering where he was. Fitz had been in to see her every single day, several times a day, since the incident. He talked to her. Kept her informed of goings-on, shared his ideas, told jokes. Anything he could think of, just to be able to let her know he was there. Skye watched as he dumped his food, minus the bread, in the garbage and ran off to the hospital wing. She sighed and shook her head.
"We all need you back, Simmons. Fitz especially." she murmured before clearing her own place.
Fitz went into the tiny hospital room. He used to grimace every time he saw Jemma with so many tubes and wires but he had gotten accustomed to them now. He sat down in a chair next to her bedside and munched on his bread.
"Afternoon, Simmons." he said casually between bites.
"You'd probably be scolding me right now. Threw a bunch of perfectly good food away. I didn't eat anything again. Well, not anything, I did grab bit of bread before I dumped my tray."
He finished of the bread and sighed.
"Not much has changed since yesterday. Coulson managed to wrangle a few more recruits. Mercenaries, more like. They're only here for the money. But, they're loyal to S.H.I.E.L.D. and not Hydra, so I guess that's good." he said with a shrug.
He looked down at her serene face and gave a sad smile.
"God, you're so beautiful." he whispered, more to himself.
He reached out and grasped her pale, still hand, giving it a light squeeze.
"You've got to pull through this, Jemma. I need my partner back. I don't care if you don't remember what I said down there or if you do and you don't feel the same way I just…..I need to see you being yourself again. Up and smiling. Bossing me 'round."
He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb gently.
"Remember the first time we were lab partners?" he said, smiling fondly. "We hated each other so much. We were so concentrated on making the each other miserable that we failed the assignment. Actually failed. You nearly had a stroke, I think. The instructor gave us another chance for half points. And, once we started working together, instead of against one another….we were unstoppable, weren't we?"
Fitz felt something move and looked down. Simmons' fingers were curling around his. His eyes opened wide.
"Jemma?" he whispered.
He looked at her face to see her eyes flutter a bit. He squeezed her hand and leaned in close to her.
"Jemma, I know you can hear me. Come on, girl. Fight." he encouraged.
Jemma's fingers tightened a bit before relaxing again. Fitz brought her hand to his lips and kissed it gently.
"Fight your way back, Jem. I know you can." he said, getting excited in spite of himself.
Her eyes fluttered again, this time in a more controlled way. She took a deep breath in, as if mustering all her strength. Her fingers tightened and this time, stayed that way. A small moan rose from her chest. Tears rolled down Fitz's cheeks. She was waking up!
"Doctor! I need a doctor, she's waking up!" he yelled as he clutched her hand tightly.
He heard footsteps approach behind him and he looked up at the doctor.
"She's squeezing my hand, doctor. And she fluttered her eyes and took a deep breath. I thought I heard her moan a bit just a second ago." he explained as he moved aside a bit, keeping hold of Jemma's hand as if he needed to help pull her through this.
The doctor crouched down and took her vitals. As he did so, she continued to stir. The doctor smiled.
"This is very good. Keep talking to her. See if you can coax her awake." he encouraged.
Fitz nodded.
"Jemma, don't give up. I'm right here. Come on you brilliant, beautiful thing."
"What's going on?" Skye asked as she came into the room.
Fitz smiled at her happily.
"She's waking up! You were right, Skye, she's waking up!" he replied excitedly.
Skye rushed over, a wide smile on her face.
"No way! Fitz, this is awesome!" she said happily.
"Skye's here, Jem. You've got to wake up now." Fitz insisted.
'Come on, Simmons, we're rooting for you!" Skye cheered.
Jemma moaned, louder this time, and screwed her eyes shut. Her free hand came up to her forehead and she arched her back. She sighed as she laid back down, now blinking as the world came into focus. Her eyes flitted around everywhere before settling on Fitz and Skye. A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth which made both of her friends tear up. Fitz looked down at the floor and gave her hand another squeeze.
"Thank you, God. Thank you for bringing her back." he whispered in a choked voice.
The doctor wanted a few minutes alone to evaluate her and help her get a sense of what was happening. Fitz waited outside, trying so hard to contain himself. Simmons was awake. After days of nothing, she was finally back with them. Fitz wanted to yell and cry and laugh all at the same time. He had his partner back. The doctor came out after a few minutes and addressed Fitz and Skye.
"Well, she's doing very well. She's coherent and responsive. She passed an initial memory test, so there's no sign so far of any amnesia-like trauma. You can go in and talk to her one at a time but try to keep it short and sweet. " he explained.
Skye smiled at Fitz.
"You go first." she insisted.
He didn't need to be told twice. When he went in, she was sitting upright and trying her hand at eating with a spoon. She looked up and smiled at him as he came and sat down next to her.
"How're you feeling?" he asked.
Jemma heaved a sigh.
"I'm….tired and, um, …a bit, uh….a bit"
Her brow wrinkled in frustration like it did when she couldn't figure something out. She sighed again and shook her head.
"My words are all…..confused! That's the word! Tired and confused."
Fitz's brow furrowed in concern and he put his hand on her arm.
'It's alright, Jemma. You can take your time readjusting. You've been through a lot." he encouraged.
Jemma looked at him, frustration still clear in her eyes.
"I heard you...while I was, um….un-…un-.."
Fitz's heart broke to see her struggle so much.
"Unconscious?" he offered.
Jemma growled in frustration and buried her head in her hands. Fitz patted her back reassuringly.
"Don't be so hard on yourself, alright? You just came out of a nine day coma, for God's sake. It's going to take a bit to get your bearings but you'll be alright." he said softly.
He reached out and cupped her cheek, turning her head so he can look in her eyes.
"I'm not going to give up on you. So don't give up on yourself, alright?"
She tried a smiled but Fitz could still tell she was irritated. He gently kissed her forehead and patted her back before standing up to go.
"Doctor said to make it short so, I'm going to head off. Skye wants to come in and see you though, are you up to it?" he asked.
Jemma seemed to consider it for a moment and then, somewhat reluctantly, nodded. Fitz noted her reluctance as he went to get Skye.
"She's not entirely herself yet, okay? She's having a little trouble forming sentences so go easy on her." he warned before sending her in.
~*#*~
The days that followed were a frustrating montage of struggling at simple everyday tasks, failing to solve simple equations, and constantly losing words in her head. Fitz tried to help her but, every time he did, she yelled at him.
"I don't want you to just give me the answers, Fitz! I need to figure this out on my own!"
"I'm sorry, Jemma. I'm just…"
"I know! You're trying to help me! But you can't, Fitz!"
She threw all of her test papers off the bed and buried her head in her hands. Fitz bent down and started picking up the papers.
"I can if you let me, Jemma. Me, Skye, Coulson, we're all trying to help you but you keep trying to do this on your own." Fitz pleaded with her.
He set the tests aside and sat on the bed next to Simmons, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and holding her tight as she silently cried.
"I know its frustrating, Jemma, I really do. And I can't imagine what you're going through right now but you can't-"
"You should have left me at the bottom of the ocean." she whispered fiercely.
"Give...up...hope..." Fitz finished, stunned by what she had just said.
He sighed and shook his head.
"You don't mean that, Jemma." he said calmly.
She shook her head and ran her fingers through her hair.
"No, its true. It would have been better for everyone." she murmured, looking like all of the life had left her.
Fitz grabbed her shoulder and turned her to look at him. He leveled his eyes at her, strong and determined.
"You think I'd be better off without you, Jemma? If you truly believe that, you don't know me at all." he said seriously.
Jemma's lip trembled and a tear streamed down her cheek.
"You deserve better, Fitz. I'm br-…bro-"
Fitz shook his head and cupped her cheek gently.
"For nine days, I sat beside this bed talking to you. I didn't know if you were even going to wake up. You think I care if you lose your words sometimes?" he whispered.
He cupped the back of her head gently and gazed into her eyes.
"I didn't leave you down in that container and I'm not going to leave you now. I love you, Jemma. That hasn't changed." he murmured.
Slowly, gently, he pressed his lips to hers. Jemma closed her eyes, allowing a few more tears to slip down her cheeks. Her hand moved, of its own accord, to rest on his shoulder while his slid into place on her back. He pulled her closer to him, having to retsrain himself from trying to take her right there. That time would come, but he would need to move toward it slowly. And he wanted it to be special. Not just a means to satisfy a desire but a tender expression of love. He broke the kiss after a few moments and softly nuzzled her forehead.
"I need you, Jemma. Please don't give up on me." he pleaded quietly.
She pressed her lips together and nodded. He smiled and gave her another quick kiss.
"That's my girl." he cooed.
Fitz convinced Jemma to give the tests another try while he went and got lunch for the both of them. He stepped out the door to see May leaning against the wall opposite him. He paused and she gave him a half-smile.
"She's doing better?" she asked.
Fitz smiled and nodded.
"Yeah. Gets frustrated with herself quite a bit, poor thing. But, once she takes the time to work things through, she starts enjoying it again." he explained.
May nodded in approval and pushed herself off the wall.
"Then maybe she can do without you for a bit. Coulson needs you to go with Skye on a mission that requires your device dissecting expertise."
Fitz shrugged and then nodded.
"Alright, sure. When?" he asked.
"Right now." May replied.
Fitz's brow furrowed. He looked back toward Jemma's room and then at May again.
"Can it wait until after lunch?" he asked.
May gave him a "Seriously?" look that told him that, no, it couldn't. He made a sound that was between a groan and a whine but nodded.
"Alright but, can you eat with her then? I just want to make sure she doesn't choke accidentally."
May nodded and Fitz smiled.
"Thank you. Alright, I'm off then." he said as he made his way to be briefed.
May grabbed two trays a food and took them to Simmons' room. When she entered, the bio-chemist regarded her with confusion.
"Where's Fitz?" she asked.
"He got called on a mission. Asked me to look after you while he's gone." May replied as she set Jemma's tray on her lap and sat down in the chair next to the bed.
Jemma sighed and nodded in understanding.
"I see." she said, somewhat disappointedly.
The two women sat and ate in awkward silence for a minute before May finally spoke up.
"So I hear you've been making steady progress these past few days." she commented. Jemma scoffed and rolled her eyes.
"If, by progress, you mean moving from eighth grade math to high school math then, yes." she muttered, picking at the carrots on her tray.
May shrugged. "Progress is progress. Some might say that going from virtually brain-dead to high school math in a few days was quite an accomplishment." she offered.
"For someone else, maybe. But for someone who had two, um...two..."
Jemma sighed and closed her eyes, trying to keep herself from getting angry.
"I used to be able to do this in my sleep." She said sadly.
After a moment, Jemma felt May's hand on her shoulder, a gesture that both surprised and comforted her. She looked over at the field agent.
"You'll get there again, Simmons. Once you stop feeling sorry for yourself and start doing something about it." she said seriously.
Jemma looked away sheepishly. Well, after all, it was hard not to feel sorry for yourself after suffering severe brain trauma. But May did have a point. The longer she kept playing the victim, the longer she would be. She gave May a little half-smile.
"You're right. Thank you, May." she whispered.
~*#*~
Well, I feel confident ending this first chapter on that note. J I will try to get chapter up by the 17th but, no promises ^~^' After all, I still have quite a good deal of Christmas prep to get done. If you like what you've read, check out my other stories, favorite, follow, and review! I am taking prompts for one-shots as well as chapter stories so please PM me or post a prompt in the reviews! Thanks for reading!