'Forbidden Memories'
Author: Raven
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Buffy/Angel characters (as much as I'd LOVE to own Angel and Spike, WHOO HOO!, they belong to Mutant whachamacallit... Grr Arrg)
Chapter 1
As Buffy sat in class, trying to take notes on her professor's lecture, her mind began to drift. She tried to pull her attention back to the class, but it was just too boring for her. 'Oh well'. She thought to herself. 'I can always get the notes from Will'. Buffy thought about her boyfriend, Riley. She remembered how they had met and then how the relationship had progressed and they had both found out about each other. She found out that he was in the Initiative, an army station in Sunnydale whose job was to capture demons. He found out that she was the chosen one, the Slayer, whose job was to guard the Hellmouth and also to hunt and kill demons and vampires. Buffy idly sketched on her notebook, not paying attention to what the sketch turned out to be. Her only thoughts were on Riley.
"Ms. Summers. Would you like to share your notes with the class?" Buffy started as the professor's voice penetrated her thoughts. The students around her muffled giggles and Buffy looked down at her notebook. She gasped as she saw what she had drawn. Covering a whole page was a sketch of Angel kissing her. Willow gasped also, looking at Buffy's notebook from behind her. "Now, if you would please resume your notes, Ms. Summers, the class can go on." The professor told her. Buffy turned red and turned to the next blank page in her notebook.
"Oh god, I'm so glad Riley's not in this class!" Buffy muttered to herself.
"Ms. Summers?" the professor said sharply. Buffy turned red again.
"Sorry," she squeaked.
* * *
"Umm... Buffy? Are, are you still in love with... Angel?" Willow asked as soon as class was over.
"No... I don't think so. I... I don't know. Will, I wasn't paying attention when I drew that picture. In fact, I was thinking about Riley!" Buffy shook her head, confused. Willow patted her on the back.
"That's really weird. Well, you wanna go eat lunch. I'm meeting Xander and Anya at McDonalds," Willow offered. Buffy shook her head no.
"Nah. I'm gonna go back to the room and take a short nap. I'm tired."
"You sure?"
"Yeah. Well, see ya later, Willow," Buffy answered. She turned away and headed to the room and went to sleep.
* * *
"A little bit upset," Buffy finished Cordelia's sentence for her. Cordelia, Doyle, and Angel all looked up, surprised to see her standing in the doorway of Angel's office.
"Buffy?" Cordelia said. "Hi." Buffy nodded at her and she and Doyle hurried out of the office. In the other room, Buffy could hear them talking. "Look out, hurricane Buffy," Cordelia muttered.
"So that's the Slayer?" Doyle asked Cordelia. Buffy ignored them and focused on Angel.
"So... didn't feel like saying hi?" Buffy questioned.
Flash!
They were down in the sewers, looking for the demon that had attacked them. Buffy had her stake out.
"Why a stake?" Angel asked. "We're hunting a demon, not a vampire."
"It's what I know best. Besides... it's better than that thing you have." Buffy motioned to the ax like weapon in Angel's hands. Angel shrugged. Buffy heard a noise and whirled, ready to attack.
"Calm down," Angel told her. "It's just a rat."
Flash!
Buffy was standing on a stone terrace overlooking the beach. She was thinking about her feelings for Angel. Some motion caught her eye and she looked over at the shadows of the archway that was covered with vines. Angel was standing there. As she watched, he took a step toward her. She held her breath as he continued, expecting him to burst into flames the moment the sun touched his skin. When he stepped full into the sunlight, she just stared. He walked right up to her, gathered her into his arms, and kissed her full on the lips.
Flash!
Buffy made herself more comfortable under the covers. Angel was in the kitchen, getting snacks. When he came back, she giggled, looking at him.
"Chocolate," Angel said. He got in bed and under the covers himself. When he got some chocolate on himself, Buffy giggled again. Then she leaned over and licked it off his bare chest. Feeling good, they slipped under the covers and did the one thing that brought pure happiness to their lives. And this time, Angelus didn't ruin it.
Flash!
Buffy fought the green demon fiercely, knowing that Angel would have no chance against the demon now that he was human. Suddenly, the demon got a hit in and Buffy went flying, thrown against the wall of the pit. Then Angel got up and went at the demon. She saw him slam his fist into the ruby in the demon's forehead and the demon died.
Flash!
She was talking to Angel. He was worried about how he was supposed to fight as a human. She shushed him.
"That's my job now," she said, then kissed him. He wouldn't accept that simple fact.
Flash!
Her face was buried in Angel's chest and sobs racked her body. One thought ran through her mind. 'It's not enough time! No!'
"How am I supposed to live, knowing what we had?" she asked, crying desperately and holding on to Angel. He pet her head, trying to soothe her.
"You won't know," he murmured softly.
"No Angel! I can't..."
"It's too late. It's already happened," Angel replied. She sobbed, burying her face in his chest again. Her eyes teary, she looked at him then.
"How long?" she asked. Angel looked at the clock.
"About a minute," Angel told her.
"That's not enough time!" she cried. She hugged Angel tight, hoping that that would stop it from happening. She kept repeating that, thinking that maybe that would make the time longer.
"About thirty seconds," Angel said. She sobbed.
"It's not enough time," she whispered one last time.
Flash!
Buffy was standing in Angel's office with a weird feeling of déjà vu. She started to tell Angel something when the window behind him suddenly bust and a demon jumped through. Without hesitation, Angel slammed his fist into a ruby in the middle of the demon's forehead and it died. Buffy considered Angel.
"Run into his kind before?" she asked.
"You, you could say that."
* * *
Buffy sat straight up in bed, breathing hard. She shook, as if trying to rid herself of the dream. If she was, it didn't go away, but seemed to cling even harder. Her stomach grumbled, reminding her that she hadn't eaten yet. Getting out of bed, she remembered the part of the dream where she had been laying in bed, waiting for Angel to come back. The dream had seemed so real that it made her wonder. In class she had drawn a picture of her and Angel kissing and now she had dreamed about her and Angel. 'What's up with me?' She silently wondered. She left the room and headed toward the cafeteria. On the way there, she saw Riley headed there also and she abruptly changed direction. Unfortunately, Riley saw her and also changed directions, coming over to talk to her. This was exactly what she DIDN'T need right now. Riley had met Angel and the two hadn't really hit it off. She tried to walk faster, hoping to lose him.
"Hey Buffy!" Riley greeted her, speeding up also to keep pace with her. "Where you headed?"
"Umm," Buffy tried to think of a place that he wouldn't follow her. "I'm going to visit Giles. I have something important to ask him."
"Giles? What's wrong? What do you have to ask him?" Riley questioned.
"No big. Just a couple personal things."
"Hey, I'll escort you there," Riley offered.
"No!" she said quickly. "I mean, you don't have to do that. You probably have more important things to do."
"Yeah," Riley replied quietly, sounding quite abashed. He hustled off in another direction and Buffy decided that she really ought to go and talk to Giles.
* * *
"Willow?" Willow turned her head from her conversation with Xander and Anya, with basically consisted of Anya asking rather rude questions and telling Xander that after that they would go back to his house, when she heard someone call her name. Riley was standing there wearing a forsaken expression. Leaving her two friends to their talking, Willow got up.
"Wha, what's wrong, Riley?" she asked.
"Do you know if Buffy is in love with someone besides me?" he said. The question jolted Willow and she didn't answer for a minute.
"Why would you think that?" she replied guardedly.
"Well, I was headed toward the cafeteria to eat and I saw Buffy headed that way. As soon as she saw me, she turned around and started heading the other way. When I tried to catch up with her, she walked faster. I asked her where she was going and she told me she was going to talk to Giles after a couple moments, like she'd just thought up the answer. Then, when I offered to escort her to his house, she practically yelled no at me. Also, I've heard some rumors about her drawing pictures of herself and other guys during class. Is it true?" Riley explained. He looked at Willow expectantly.
"I dunno," Willow tried. She didn't want to have to lie to him, but if she told him the truth... well, the relationship would turn out the worse for wear.
"What do ya mean, you don't know? You're in that class with her," Riley asked.
"That, that doesn't mean I know what she's drawing," Willow countered. 'Good thing I know my way around words.' Willow thought to herself. Riley sighed and started to head off.
"Well, if she tells you anything, would you please tell me?"
"Mmm," she replied, making sure not to make that a real yes. Feeling worried, Willow left and headed to Giles' house.
* * *
"Giles, I don't know what to do. I feel weird and I'm having these dreams. It seems that suddenly I'm thinking a lot more about Angel," Buffy told her old watcher. Giles sighed, running a hand through his graying hair.
"First off, you need to tell me about these dreams you said your having," he said to her. Buffy's face turned red.
"I don't think you wanna know," she replied.
"Just tell me," Giles gave her a look.
"Fine. Well, it starts out as a memory. It's from back in Thanksgiving when I went to L.A. and I confronted Angel. I'm standing in his office and I can remember walking in and surprising them by finishing Cordelia's sentence. Then there's this flash and Angel and I are down in the sewers, searching for some demon, like we used to here. But that didn't happen when I went to L.A. Well, we talk and then there's another flash and I'm standing on a stone terrace over the ocean. Angel walks out into the sunlight without catching fire and he kisses me. Another flash and... well... I'm in bed waiting for Angel to come back from the kitchen with the chocolate. And this time he didn't go bad." Buffy turned redder when she said that. "Flash, and I'm fighting this green demon with a ruby jewel in the middle of his forehead. I get the feeling that I have to protect Angel because he can't fight as a human. I get kicked and Angel hits the ruby and the demon dies. Another flash and I'm reassuring Angel that it's my job to fight the demons now, since he can't do that as a human. Flash, and I'm crying on him, telling him that it isn't enough time. I get this sense that I'm about to forget all about what had just happened, all the other parts of the dream except the first. I ask him how I'm supposed to live knowing what we had and he tells me I won't know. One last flash and I'm standing in Angel's office again. This part is real memory. I was about to tell him something when the window behind him busts open and the green demon appears in the room. And exactly as I remembered it, Angel turns around, hits the ruby and the demon dies."
"Well," Giles said. "Maybe that is a little more than I wanted to know. But it's important."
"Another thing. I was in class today and I was daydreaming about Riley and just doodling on my notebook. I didn't pay attention to what I was drawing. When I looked down at it, there was this picture of Angel kissing me."
"It seems like you have Angel on the brain. Especially if you dream about... well, to put it mildly, having sex with him." Giles looked at her, taking his glasses off at the same time. "When did you have this dream?"
"What dream?" came Willow's voice from the doorway. Buffy stood up immediately, embarrassed.
"Nothing!" she exclaimed quickly. "Nothing at all." With that, she hurried out of the house, leaving Giles and Willow looking at each other, concerned.
*hope you enjoy! please r&r!*
Author: Raven
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Buffy/Angel characters (as much as I'd LOVE to own Angel and Spike, WHOO HOO!, they belong to Mutant whachamacallit... Grr Arrg)
Chapter 1
As Buffy sat in class, trying to take notes on her professor's lecture, her mind began to drift. She tried to pull her attention back to the class, but it was just too boring for her. 'Oh well'. She thought to herself. 'I can always get the notes from Will'. Buffy thought about her boyfriend, Riley. She remembered how they had met and then how the relationship had progressed and they had both found out about each other. She found out that he was in the Initiative, an army station in Sunnydale whose job was to capture demons. He found out that she was the chosen one, the Slayer, whose job was to guard the Hellmouth and also to hunt and kill demons and vampires. Buffy idly sketched on her notebook, not paying attention to what the sketch turned out to be. Her only thoughts were on Riley.
"Ms. Summers. Would you like to share your notes with the class?" Buffy started as the professor's voice penetrated her thoughts. The students around her muffled giggles and Buffy looked down at her notebook. She gasped as she saw what she had drawn. Covering a whole page was a sketch of Angel kissing her. Willow gasped also, looking at Buffy's notebook from behind her. "Now, if you would please resume your notes, Ms. Summers, the class can go on." The professor told her. Buffy turned red and turned to the next blank page in her notebook.
"Oh god, I'm so glad Riley's not in this class!" Buffy muttered to herself.
"Ms. Summers?" the professor said sharply. Buffy turned red again.
"Sorry," she squeaked.
* * *
"Umm... Buffy? Are, are you still in love with... Angel?" Willow asked as soon as class was over.
"No... I don't think so. I... I don't know. Will, I wasn't paying attention when I drew that picture. In fact, I was thinking about Riley!" Buffy shook her head, confused. Willow patted her on the back.
"That's really weird. Well, you wanna go eat lunch. I'm meeting Xander and Anya at McDonalds," Willow offered. Buffy shook her head no.
"Nah. I'm gonna go back to the room and take a short nap. I'm tired."
"You sure?"
"Yeah. Well, see ya later, Willow," Buffy answered. She turned away and headed to the room and went to sleep.
* * *
"A little bit upset," Buffy finished Cordelia's sentence for her. Cordelia, Doyle, and Angel all looked up, surprised to see her standing in the doorway of Angel's office.
"Buffy?" Cordelia said. "Hi." Buffy nodded at her and she and Doyle hurried out of the office. In the other room, Buffy could hear them talking. "Look out, hurricane Buffy," Cordelia muttered.
"So that's the Slayer?" Doyle asked Cordelia. Buffy ignored them and focused on Angel.
"So... didn't feel like saying hi?" Buffy questioned.
Flash!
They were down in the sewers, looking for the demon that had attacked them. Buffy had her stake out.
"Why a stake?" Angel asked. "We're hunting a demon, not a vampire."
"It's what I know best. Besides... it's better than that thing you have." Buffy motioned to the ax like weapon in Angel's hands. Angel shrugged. Buffy heard a noise and whirled, ready to attack.
"Calm down," Angel told her. "It's just a rat."
Flash!
Buffy was standing on a stone terrace overlooking the beach. She was thinking about her feelings for Angel. Some motion caught her eye and she looked over at the shadows of the archway that was covered with vines. Angel was standing there. As she watched, he took a step toward her. She held her breath as he continued, expecting him to burst into flames the moment the sun touched his skin. When he stepped full into the sunlight, she just stared. He walked right up to her, gathered her into his arms, and kissed her full on the lips.
Flash!
Buffy made herself more comfortable under the covers. Angel was in the kitchen, getting snacks. When he came back, she giggled, looking at him.
"Chocolate," Angel said. He got in bed and under the covers himself. When he got some chocolate on himself, Buffy giggled again. Then she leaned over and licked it off his bare chest. Feeling good, they slipped under the covers and did the one thing that brought pure happiness to their lives. And this time, Angelus didn't ruin it.
Flash!
Buffy fought the green demon fiercely, knowing that Angel would have no chance against the demon now that he was human. Suddenly, the demon got a hit in and Buffy went flying, thrown against the wall of the pit. Then Angel got up and went at the demon. She saw him slam his fist into the ruby in the demon's forehead and the demon died.
Flash!
She was talking to Angel. He was worried about how he was supposed to fight as a human. She shushed him.
"That's my job now," she said, then kissed him. He wouldn't accept that simple fact.
Flash!
Her face was buried in Angel's chest and sobs racked her body. One thought ran through her mind. 'It's not enough time! No!'
"How am I supposed to live, knowing what we had?" she asked, crying desperately and holding on to Angel. He pet her head, trying to soothe her.
"You won't know," he murmured softly.
"No Angel! I can't..."
"It's too late. It's already happened," Angel replied. She sobbed, burying her face in his chest again. Her eyes teary, she looked at him then.
"How long?" she asked. Angel looked at the clock.
"About a minute," Angel told her.
"That's not enough time!" she cried. She hugged Angel tight, hoping that that would stop it from happening. She kept repeating that, thinking that maybe that would make the time longer.
"About thirty seconds," Angel said. She sobbed.
"It's not enough time," she whispered one last time.
Flash!
Buffy was standing in Angel's office with a weird feeling of déjà vu. She started to tell Angel something when the window behind him suddenly bust and a demon jumped through. Without hesitation, Angel slammed his fist into a ruby in the middle of the demon's forehead and it died. Buffy considered Angel.
"Run into his kind before?" she asked.
"You, you could say that."
* * *
Buffy sat straight up in bed, breathing hard. She shook, as if trying to rid herself of the dream. If she was, it didn't go away, but seemed to cling even harder. Her stomach grumbled, reminding her that she hadn't eaten yet. Getting out of bed, she remembered the part of the dream where she had been laying in bed, waiting for Angel to come back. The dream had seemed so real that it made her wonder. In class she had drawn a picture of her and Angel kissing and now she had dreamed about her and Angel. 'What's up with me?' She silently wondered. She left the room and headed toward the cafeteria. On the way there, she saw Riley headed there also and she abruptly changed direction. Unfortunately, Riley saw her and also changed directions, coming over to talk to her. This was exactly what she DIDN'T need right now. Riley had met Angel and the two hadn't really hit it off. She tried to walk faster, hoping to lose him.
"Hey Buffy!" Riley greeted her, speeding up also to keep pace with her. "Where you headed?"
"Umm," Buffy tried to think of a place that he wouldn't follow her. "I'm going to visit Giles. I have something important to ask him."
"Giles? What's wrong? What do you have to ask him?" Riley questioned.
"No big. Just a couple personal things."
"Hey, I'll escort you there," Riley offered.
"No!" she said quickly. "I mean, you don't have to do that. You probably have more important things to do."
"Yeah," Riley replied quietly, sounding quite abashed. He hustled off in another direction and Buffy decided that she really ought to go and talk to Giles.
* * *
"Willow?" Willow turned her head from her conversation with Xander and Anya, with basically consisted of Anya asking rather rude questions and telling Xander that after that they would go back to his house, when she heard someone call her name. Riley was standing there wearing a forsaken expression. Leaving her two friends to their talking, Willow got up.
"Wha, what's wrong, Riley?" she asked.
"Do you know if Buffy is in love with someone besides me?" he said. The question jolted Willow and she didn't answer for a minute.
"Why would you think that?" she replied guardedly.
"Well, I was headed toward the cafeteria to eat and I saw Buffy headed that way. As soon as she saw me, she turned around and started heading the other way. When I tried to catch up with her, she walked faster. I asked her where she was going and she told me she was going to talk to Giles after a couple moments, like she'd just thought up the answer. Then, when I offered to escort her to his house, she practically yelled no at me. Also, I've heard some rumors about her drawing pictures of herself and other guys during class. Is it true?" Riley explained. He looked at Willow expectantly.
"I dunno," Willow tried. She didn't want to have to lie to him, but if she told him the truth... well, the relationship would turn out the worse for wear.
"What do ya mean, you don't know? You're in that class with her," Riley asked.
"That, that doesn't mean I know what she's drawing," Willow countered. 'Good thing I know my way around words.' Willow thought to herself. Riley sighed and started to head off.
"Well, if she tells you anything, would you please tell me?"
"Mmm," she replied, making sure not to make that a real yes. Feeling worried, Willow left and headed to Giles' house.
* * *
"Giles, I don't know what to do. I feel weird and I'm having these dreams. It seems that suddenly I'm thinking a lot more about Angel," Buffy told her old watcher. Giles sighed, running a hand through his graying hair.
"First off, you need to tell me about these dreams you said your having," he said to her. Buffy's face turned red.
"I don't think you wanna know," she replied.
"Just tell me," Giles gave her a look.
"Fine. Well, it starts out as a memory. It's from back in Thanksgiving when I went to L.A. and I confronted Angel. I'm standing in his office and I can remember walking in and surprising them by finishing Cordelia's sentence. Then there's this flash and Angel and I are down in the sewers, searching for some demon, like we used to here. But that didn't happen when I went to L.A. Well, we talk and then there's another flash and I'm standing on a stone terrace over the ocean. Angel walks out into the sunlight without catching fire and he kisses me. Another flash and... well... I'm in bed waiting for Angel to come back from the kitchen with the chocolate. And this time he didn't go bad." Buffy turned redder when she said that. "Flash, and I'm fighting this green demon with a ruby jewel in the middle of his forehead. I get the feeling that I have to protect Angel because he can't fight as a human. I get kicked and Angel hits the ruby and the demon dies. Another flash and I'm reassuring Angel that it's my job to fight the demons now, since he can't do that as a human. Flash, and I'm crying on him, telling him that it isn't enough time. I get this sense that I'm about to forget all about what had just happened, all the other parts of the dream except the first. I ask him how I'm supposed to live knowing what we had and he tells me I won't know. One last flash and I'm standing in Angel's office again. This part is real memory. I was about to tell him something when the window behind him busts open and the green demon appears in the room. And exactly as I remembered it, Angel turns around, hits the ruby and the demon dies."
"Well," Giles said. "Maybe that is a little more than I wanted to know. But it's important."
"Another thing. I was in class today and I was daydreaming about Riley and just doodling on my notebook. I didn't pay attention to what I was drawing. When I looked down at it, there was this picture of Angel kissing me."
"It seems like you have Angel on the brain. Especially if you dream about... well, to put it mildly, having sex with him." Giles looked at her, taking his glasses off at the same time. "When did you have this dream?"
"What dream?" came Willow's voice from the doorway. Buffy stood up immediately, embarrassed.
"Nothing!" she exclaimed quickly. "Nothing at all." With that, she hurried out of the house, leaving Giles and Willow looking at each other, concerned.
*hope you enjoy! please r&r!*