Author's Notes : I was thinking... what's one one of the most important things to teenagers? Especially teenage boys? They spend much of their time focusing on getting off and/or getting laid, right? And then I got thinking now incredibly hard and frustrating it must be on the four turtles to NOT to be able to do that and what they'd do to deal with it.

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Leo
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"Hey..." Leo had been walking past Don's lab when he heard him. He paused, wondering at the quiet voice. Raph usually didn't keep his voice down unless he was doing something wrong.

"Careful wit' that... you okay?" Raph continued, still speaking low.

Donatello's lighter voice replied. He couldn't make out the words, but they sounded like he was pleading. And then Raph grunted and he could hear...

A rhythmic thumping noise. Very soft, very slight... and very obvious.

And completely mind blowing.

Leonardo's eyes widened to an impossible size and he snuck towards the door. He was a ninja, he was very good at getting into rooms unnoticed, and proceeded to do just that... slipping the lock of Don's lab door and darting in without a sound.

... He stopped, his mouth falling open. His suspicions were confirmed, but nothing could prepare him for actually witnessing it.

He supposed he shouldn't have been surprised. He had caught Donny doing it the most... sitting in front of his computer monitor... of course the screen was turned away from him, but he could see his hand working down below. He had caught him sitting on the couch watching a movie with a blanket over his lap so at a casual glance it appeared that nothing was happening beneath. He did the blanket thing frequently, so much so he had taken to casually joke-asking if he was cold. Mikey had leapt on him one time when he was doing that, excited about something or other. That had elected a discrete smile from Leo as Donny fought to get his brother off of him and his dick tucked back in without Mike noticing.

This... this was completely different.

He was sitting on one of his lab tables, which would have been fine, except for where Raph was. Raph stood above him, over him... IN him. Don's legs were wrapped around his shell and arms around the back of his neck as Raphael had braced himself on the table top with his hands and was thrusting into him. Leo watched, horrified, as they moved against each other, in out in out in... and wondered how the hell this had come about it. Maybe Raph had walked in on Don and decided to take advantage of him? It was just... so stunning, he actually lost the ability to speak for a moment or so.

He blinked and figured he had to find the ability to speak again, and fast. "What the hell is going on here?" He demanded to know.

They both moved extremely fast, Raph wrenching away from Donny... his dick out (god he didn't want to see that) and Don covered himself with a little cry.

"Leo!" Raph exclaimed, in a shocked strained voice. Leo looked from one to the other... Don looked scared as he hunched over himself, tucking and putting away, and Raph had THAT look on his face, the wide eyed one with a hint of fear and anger on his face... the one he got when he knew he was in so much shit that he was afraid of the punishment.

"What's going on, Raph?" He repeated, glaring at his brother.

"It's my fault," Donatello said quickly in his light tenor voice as he hopped down off the counter and took a step towards him. "I wanted..."

"No Don," Leo watched as Raph held out an arm to stop him, and suddenly Leo realized that he really DIDN'T want to know. The moment Don tried to take the blame told him it wasn't something he wanted to get involved with. It was mutual, Raph wasn't taking advantage of anybody. More than that, Raph didn't instantly react with an "it's HIS fault" which told him that this wasn't something his volatile brother wanted to loose. His body language told him that Raph would take the fall for this, for whatever Don and him had going, which meant a ton of heartbreak, a ton of problems and a ton of headaches he didn't want to deal with.

"Wait," He held out his hands in a 'stop' gesture and they both froze. Leonardo shut his eyes. When he opened his eyes again they were both still there, tense and frightened, Raph's arm still held out ever so slightly to keep Don back. Don looked a little bit ashamed and a little bit anxious, his wide brown eyes pleaded with Leo for some sort of relief... whether compassion or understanding or just not to go too harshly on them about the incest thing. He sighed, then glared from one to the other. "I don't want to know." He said quickly. He considered before continuing. "Just be discrete about it, keep it to yourselves and don't you dare let it effect your training." He ordered.

Raphael's eyes widened as that processed. So did Don's for that matter. "Wait a minute," His hot headed brother said, pointing at him. "You mean you're not going to do anything to us?"

Leonardo gave his brother a very serious look. "If at any point you're caught by Michaelanglo or Master Splinter," He made a cutting motion with his hand. "I didn't see you today." He paused. "AND..." Both of them flinched. "If this starts to effect your abilities as fighters I will put a stop to it." He added. He made a face as he turned to go, his lip curling. "Keep it down."

He only caught a fleeting glimpse of the grateful and relieved expressions on both their faces before he left the room.

Don
--

He tried to be discrete about it. He did everything he could to keep it to himself. It was just that... he never really got out. Mikey, he knew, skateboarded off to a hidden place half a mile down the sewer pipes where he kept an ample amount of playboys and other girlie mags stashed to jack off too. Raphael was allowed to roam the surface above and take out his aggression on the human race. Only condition Leo had laid down was he didn't hurt anyone, didn't get caught and he wasn't allowed to do it more than once a month or so. He guessed that even Leo recognized that Raph needed a break every once and a while... either that or he knew that Raph would just get impossible to deal with if he didn't let him go out and do his thing.

Because of his roaming, more than once Raphael had come home smelling of alcohol and sex. Donatello would stare at his brother enviously then, wondering that he could convince humans to do that with him. Apparently if you got the right amount of alcohol in someone you could do anything really...

Leo he wasn't sure about, though if he did do anything, Don was sure his training would allow him to do his thing completely unnoticed by the rest of them.

What did he have? A computer. The computer was nice, that was for sure, but it also left him the most vulnerable to being caught.

Which was exactly what happened the night when Raph walked in on him.

He hadn't been prepared for it... everyone had gone to bed except him. Raphael had come home early from his bar or wherever he went. He had been drinking, Donatello could tell the moment he got close, as he frantically tried to tuck himself inside and close the folders on his computer before he could see. He obviously hadn't been drinking ENOUGH as he smoothly flipped over and yanked Don's chair out of the way so that he could peer at the monitor.

"Raph!" Donatello protested.

Raph chuckled. "Let's see what turns the brainiac on," He replied, clicking open the folder that Donatello hadn't been able to close in time.

"No, stop!" He gasped, trying to wrestle his brother away. Raphael merely sent him flying a few feet back with a good shove.

He stopped fighting then, since Raph had already seen anyway. He stood there in shame as Raph clicked through the rest of that particular folder of his porn collection.

Finally the redclad turtle straightened up with a small "huh." He turned.

Donatello just looked at him and waited for judgment to fall, as Raphael looked him up and down.

"Never took you for the gay bondage porn type," He said finally, a hint of a smile quirking at his mouth.

Don winced and shut his eyes. "Raph just go away." He said, wishing very much the floor would open up and swallow him whole. He was never going to be able to look Raphael in the eye again...

"Hey," Raph continued, walking towards him for some reason. "To each their own. I mean I've tried it before, it's not so bad."

That made him raise his head. Donatello stared. "You... what?" He replied.

Raphael chuckled, a low sound that for some reason sent shivers down his spine. It was odd because usually he found Raph chuckling damn annoying. "There are 8 million people in that city Don," He said, thrusting a thumb towards the ceiling. "You think there wouldn't be at least one of them who would enjoy a good romp with a well endowed freak?"

Donatello stared. Raph had continued to advance on him, until he was only a couple inches away. It was disorientating and now he could smell the alcohol on Raph's breath very well. "Raphael what are you doing?" He asked quietly.

The toothy grin Raphael gave him was scary. "Offerin'." He said. "If you wanna play. Only condition is... " He leaned closer. "I get to be in charge if ya know what I mean."

His erection, which completely died the moment he had been caught, threatened to flair back to life again. Donatello shook his head quickly and shoved him away, hard. Raphael looked a bit surprised as he ended up on his ass on the floor.

Donatello stepped past him, back to his computer and shut it down. "Go away Raph." He said tiredly as he did so. "Just leave me alone."

-

It got him thinking though, and he really really didn't want to think about it either. What if he took him up on it? Was it really that bad? He knew Raph was his brother and all, but he had experience. Drunken experience but experience all the same. But sex with his brother... he wasn't sure if he could pull it off. Once he considered asking Mikey if he was interested, but rejected the idea right away. Not happening. But now that one of them had come on to him...

He was drunk, He reminded himself. Drunk and stupid.

But now he couldn't get the thought out of his head, hadn't been able to all night, which bothered him a great deal. He actually caught himself thinking about Raphael sexually, which he never ever would have done before. What would it be like? He imagined, with Raph involved, that it would be hard, fast, dirty and wrong. He shook his head, trying to block out the thoughts. Come on, he thought to himself. It's Raphael. He's argumentative, can't control himself, and likes to kill things. Are you really that desperate?

He didn't know what to say to Raphael the next day. It ended up being Raph who cornered him in his lab. Donatello had pretended to be completely enthralled with the project he was currently working on. He had tried not to jump when Raph put his hand on the edge of his lab table.

"What do you want?" He sighed, still not looking up.

"To apologize."

Don looked up then. Raphael looked remorseful, which rarely happened. "Look, Donny," He spread his hands outwards. "I realize that I shouldn't have done that. I was a little bit... you know... an' I wasn't thinking clearly. What you do in your own time is your personal business." He stopped and sighed. "I won't be telling anyone about what turns you on, if that's what you're worried about."

Donatello just looked at him. He felt like he was in pain. That wasn't what upset him the most about the day before... but he doubted that Raph would bring up the other thing he had done. He dropped his eyes again. "It's okay," He muttered, picking up a screw driver and the electrical component he had been working on. He shook his head slightly. "It's not just that that turns me on you know," He said after a pause. His hands were shaking ever so slightly. "There are other things on my hard drive," Nice normal vanilla porn, people kissing, animated stuff, "Women too you know."

"Don..."

"I mean, you just caught me looking at, uh, the more interesting stuff and..." He was fumbling, he could feel it, and very soon he was going to crash and burn.

"Hey," Raphael touched his arm and Don dropped the objects in his hands with a clatter.

He looked up at his brother, his eyes wide. Raphael was giving him an understanding look. "It's okay." He said.

Donatello shook his head slowly. "No Raph," He replied in a near whisper. "No it's really not." He looked away again. "I mean, I'm already a freak..." He drew in a shuddering breath and let it out in a sigh. "I don't know how you can just go up there and convince them to do that with you... how they don't look at you..." He stared at his hands suddenly. "Look at you like you're some sort of monster..." He looked back up at Raph.

Raph's eyes had grown darker, though he did manage a slight smile. "They do," He replied. He flashed a grin, and it wasn't very nice. "But some times they just need a little convincing..." He trailed off suggestively.

Donatello's blood ran cold at that and he actually pushed away from the lab table and Raphael, horrified understanding dawning on him. "Raph," He whispered, a hand carrying up to press against his mouth. "Raph I can't believe..." He could. If anyone could do it, Raphael could. Even if it contradicted everything Master Splinter has taught them. Raphael always walked a little bit closer to the dark side then the rest of them... with the possible exception of Leo when he snapped.

Raph's eyebrow ridges flew together in sudden concern, and then realization flooded his face. "No!" He said quickly, walking towards him. "No, not like that." He spread his hands wide, and then frowned, bringing his hands to his hips as he thought. "Look, Don... I go to the freaky bars, you know with the humans that think they're werewolves and shit? Sometimes they're a little bit frightened to see that this," he made a hand motion to himself. "Is real, but usually by then we're pretty far into it..." a cocky grin began to develop on his face, "And I know what to do and where to touch them to make 'em like it."

Donatello stared at him long and hard. "What if they don't want to do it?" He asked.

Raph shrugged. "Then off they go back to their boring little lives and 9 to 5 jobs." He smiled. "But usually I know how to pick 'em."

"Ah." Donatello walked by him, intent on getting back to his work. Raphael wasn't a rapist, and he still wasn't getting laid, so talking any further was just going to be unpleasant for him.

Unfortunately Raph caught his arm before he could make it all the way to the lab table.

"Hey," He said. "Don... what I said last night..."

Donatello froze, then slowly turned to look at Raphael. He couldn't even manage out a "yeah" in reply.

Raphael gave him a mildly sympathetic look. "Offers still open if you want." He said quietly.

Donatello shut his eyes quickly, feeling like he was in pain again. His breathing had shortened as well. Unfortunately Raphael chose that moment to drop his arm. "Just sayin'" He said. He turned and walked from the room, leaving Donatello staring after him in anguish.

-

A couple nights later Raph came home at four in the morning. Donatello was the only one still up, getting a midnight snack. Raph stumbled through the door, dropped his trench coat and hat randomly on the floor and collapsed on the couch with a grumble and a groan.

Donatello could smell the sex on him from the kitchen and was surprised to feel a slight twinge of jealousy. He didn't know if it was because his brother got laid, or because his brother got laid with someone else other than him.

"Didn't Leo tell you to keep it down to only once and a while?" Donatello asked as he came over and glared down at him.

Raphael groaned again and slung an arm over his eyes. After a couple seconds a smile arched across his face. "She was really hot." He replied. "I had to see if I could run into her again."

"She?" Donatello replied. The sharp spike of jealousy he felt now caught him completely off guard. "I thought you liked men," He said quickly in a hushed voice incase someone was still awake.

"Huh, wa?" Raph removed his arm and blinked up at him, confused. "Oh," He said, realization flashing across his face. "Heh. Everyone has something you can stick a dick into, Don." Raphael said with a lecherous smile. "You should know that more than anyone."

Donatello blushed and didn't reply. He turned away and walked back to the kitchen and to his snack.

Raph didn't move or do much of anything for several minutes as Don made a sandwich and ate it. He was in the middle of putting everything away when Raph got off the couch with another groan and the pop of limbs as he stretched.

He walked over to the counter and leaned against it, focusing intently on his brother. "Don," He said. "Talk to me..."

"There's nothing to talk about." Don replied, putting the mayonnaise in the fridge and closing it again with a snap of finality. "I'm going to bed."

"There is something to talk about." Raph said. "You're being all quiet and stuff." He paused. "That means you're pissed."

Donatello closed his eyes, clenched his fists and tried not to scream. "No, Raph," He said finally, turning back around again. "It means I'm tired and I don't want to talk right now. Now if you'll excuse me..."

Raph caught his arm before he could make it out of the kitchen. With one swift jerk he brought his brother back around. Raphael studied Don, and Don yanked back on the tight hold Raphael had on his wrist, wanting to get free. "Raph, let go," He ordered.

Raph shook his head once sharply. "No," He replied, leaning in closer, dangerously close to...

Donatello made a face. "You smell like alcohol Raphael, let me go."

"Don..." Raph began, but Donatello had had enough. He punched Raphael in the face with a crack. Raph let go of his wrist and went down, swearing, and with his hand held to his cheek.

Donatello stared at him for a moment, mentally determined that he was okay by how he was swearing a blue streak, and trekked off to bed.

-

It was like clockwork, he marveled, as Raphael came to visit him again the next day. This time he wasn't nervous though, just a bit upset and fairly tired as Raphael approached.

He continued to work like there was nothing wrong as Raphael put a hand on his lab table and looked at him for a long while. Finally he sighed and spoke. "Hey Don," He said in a weighed voice.

Donatello sighed. "Raph, stop it," He said, looking up wearily. "Look. I'm sorry for punching you last night, I've decided not to talk to you any more when you get back from... wherever that place is, I'm NOT going to take you up on your offer, so PLEASE, can we just drop it?" He turned back to his lab table and picked up a couple parts... then stared at them. What was he doing again?

Raphael took a step towards him. "Why?" He asked.

Donatello put down the stuff in his hands. "Why what?" He returned.

Raphael reached out towards him and touched his cheek. "Why not?" Donatello started slightly, then turned to look at Raphael out of wide eyes. He looked completely sincere. And caring, which was damn different from the Raphael he was used to.

... He was just trying to get into his pants... if he had any, his brain reminded him. Donatello shut his eyes. "Because, Raph, I'm not just some random human you can just get drunk and fuck," Raphael started to say something, but Don cut him off. "I'm you're brother, which by the way, would make this wrong on so many different levels, AND I have to live with you afterwards."

Raphael dropped his hand and pulled away slightly. "Donny..." He said in a soft voice.

Don just looked at him. "What Raph?" He replied. "Tell me what I'm missing..."

Raphael turned away from him then turned back again. "I wouldn't." He said. He reached out for Donatello suddenly, bringing his face against the others and kissing him soundly. Donatello froze with shock and just stood there.

"I..." Raphael pulled away again and actually looked a bit frightened. "Ah geez, I didn't mean to do that..." He said quickly, taking a step back. He looked like he was about to bolt from the room.

Donatello raised a hand to his lips and he stared back at Raphael as his mind processed the kiss. In a way it was an answer to his questions. Sort of. Either way, something inside his head broke as he decided to let go and just do it. He deliberately grabbed Raphael and kissed him back as hard as he could.

For a second Raph resisted. But only for a second. And then he had Don backed against the lab table, fingers digging in to his arms as he delved into his brother's mouth. It was good... exciting... and, oh god they were going to get in so much shit for this...

When they separated again they were both short of breath as Donatello peered anxiously at Raphael. "Leo will kill us," he whispered hoarsely. "And if Master Splinter ever finds out..."

Raphael's eyes widened as he considered that. "You're right," He said. Then a very small smile snuck across his face. "Guess we'll just have to not get caught," He said.

Donatello managed a small smile in return, before Raphael angled in for another kiss and he was lost.

--

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