Dissing the Cord
Character Summary
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Claudio "Clauds"- If you say anime is real, he'll believe you.

Michael "Mickey" - Spider-loving cuck who drops the mic when he's done talking.

Flynn "Froggy" - Real-life bobble head.

Alexander "Small Dick" - Mexican Asian waiting to be deported.

Anthony "Duckfuck" Savoia - Beats his meat to ducks.

Carl "Aussie" - 26-year old kangaroo fucker.

Kyle "Watermelon" - He'll be thirsty after this.

Ethan "Steelix" - Homosexual asshole with a fucked up jaw.

The Fam had settled into a cabin for the weekend for some family fun! Though at first, everyone did their own things. While Claudio tried to watch anime, he couldn't concentrate with the League-induced screams from the other room. "Way to start off the day..." He scoffed and went outside to get some fresh air.

Amidst their game of League, Ant went to get a drink of water. "Thanks for leaving mid-game, bitch." Alex let out a whiny remark. "Downies aren't my specialty." Ant added as he walked out the door; As he did so, a figure leapt out at him.

"The hell-!?" A male with an oddly-shaped jaw revealed himself; Ethan, who was not invited to the meetup. "None of that gay shit, what are you doing here?" Ant asked in fear, likely because he was holding a knife.

"Why didn't you invite me, Anthony...?" Ant had been backed up to a corner, and League distracted the others. "I just got invited, I didn't come up with it." He began to lose breath as Ethan neared the knife to his throat. It was clear this night wouldn't end well.

While Claudio was outside, he had noticed a peculiar scene. Ethan, who shouldn't be here, cornering Ant with a kitchen knife. "...This can't end well." He ran towards the scene and tackled Ethan. "Ant! Get out, quick!" Ant stumbled to his feet and ran across the cabin.

"Everyone get out, now!" He screamed from room to room. He ran back to retrieve his laptop; 'Goodbye, old friend.' He parted with it mentally while running towards Ethan. "Claud, get your shit, I'm takin' one for the team!" Claudio jumped off, realizing what he was about to do. "...Alright." He followed his advice and ran.

Once Claudio let go of his grasp on Ethan, it wasn't long before his face made contact with Anthony's laptop; In a mere second, Ant had smashed his laptop onto Ethan's face, continuously across his body until he lost energy. With each blow came screams of pain as insanity rose in the household. With one final blow, Ant jumped in the air and smashed his laptop mid-air onto Ethan, leaving a bloodbath of scars and computer bits. "I ain't about that sus shit." He let in a one-liner amongst panting before he ran with everyone else.

The sounds of the event had rung in Claudio's ear. "Somehow...This won't end well." He repeated himself before meeting with everyone else.

KILL COUNT: 1/8 (Ethan)

It was a stretch to say they were scared; Ant killed a guy. It didn't help that they knew Ethan, and that he died with a broken heart. "...So..." Michael let out the first word uttered in minutes.

Ant's expression was one that couldn't be fathomed; His eyes were wide, and he seemed unstable. But who wouldn't be after that situation? While contemplating on their next action, there was one thing missing; Flynn.

"...Where's Flynn?" Claudio asked abruptly. He was locked in the bathroom, and unbeknownst to them, he wasn't using the toilet.

The doorbell had rung. The single sound had caused everyone to look around in horror; The ringing itself wasn't the problem, no, it was the black silhouettes that stood before it.

The room was completely still, but not Anthony. He had ran upstairs and prepared himself to barge the bathroom door down. "OPEN UP, FLYNN!" Ant demanded, a tone mixed with fear and anger. The door wouldn't budge.

Panic spread through everyone, invoking them to run. Their belongings no longer mattered, as they all had a feeling they wouldn't survive. Kyle had grabbed Aussie by the hair before he could make a run for it. "You did this...THIS WAS YOUR IDEA!"

Thankfully, the doors had shutters due to the incoming hurricane, so it took longer for the cops to bust the door down. As Kyle dug Aussie deeper and deeper wounds, he simply lay there. "Is that what you pin it on?" The curly-haired male looked on at the enraged Kyle.

With the progression of horror in the household, the cops had eventually busted the house down. They saw Aussie "choking" Kyle down to the ground, breaking them apart until Aussie kicked the cops back. "...What...?"

Kyle was confused as Aussie had physically taken the blame for it. He threw a vase nearby him at one of the cops and swivel kicked the other. The only sound Kyle heard then were bullets. "...!-NO!"

"War changes a man..." Aussie simply muttered while the bullets expanded into his chest. "If you're going...to enroll in the military, don't blame...just shame..." Aussie then fell to the ground, Kyle looking on in horror.

KILL COUNT: 2/8 (Aussie)

Alex and Ant eventually cooperated to bust the door down, revealing a timid Flynn. "GET AWAY!" Flynn took a towel from the hanger and tackled the two. Ant fell back, but with Alex in the front, Flynn met face-to-face with a fist. Alex grabbed his throat, squeezing his neck so hard his eyes appeared to pop out of his head. In self-defense, Flynn drove his open fist into Alex's balls.

It was a single moment of silence. Alex let out a feminine scream as Ant pushed Alex into Flynn. Flynn took a bottle of Suave from the bathroom and sprayed it at Anthony's eyes, blinding him as he broke his back on the bathtub. Alex jumped back onto Flynn, his hand grabbing Flynn's hair and smashing his face into the window.

Michael was distraught; Was there a way to restore their sanity? "..." The sight of Claudio furthered his thoughts. "What do you plan on doing?" He asked solemnly. "Helping our friends, dumbass! There's still a way to save them before the cops get up here!"

As he opened the door to the bathroom, Michael reached for Claudio's neck and dug into his pressure point. "...There'll be no need for that." He left an unconscious Claudio on the floor. "If League's taught me anything-" He took the toaster from the upstairs kitchen. "-It's to overcome downies."

These beings before Michael were no longer his friends, but savage animals. As the shower water ran, Michael threw the toaster. Ant had attempted to crawl out, but it was too late for him Flynn had jumped out, giving a solid kick to Michael's face. "...That all you got, Froggy?" Michael clenched his fist to counter. The now soulless humans didn't even consider the death of their dear friend in the bathtub.

KILL COUNT: 3/8 (Anthony)

The only innocent one left was Kyle Waters. "Officers, my friends upstairs, they're going insane!" Kyle guided the two as they ran to the sight of the crime. Claudio was passed out, Michael and Flynn were duking it out, and Alex had appeared to have electrocuted Anthony. Alex's legs were permanently paralyzed, and as he reeled a fishing rod towards the two to end the fighting, it had latched onto Kyle's hair.

"Uh oh." The few words were enough to foreshadow Michael and Flynn's consecutive attacks on Kyle. The boy was launched over the stairs and face first onto the floor. A single being hitting the ground followed shortly after.

KILL COUNT: 4/8 (Kyle)

Claudio had awoken to the mutual look of terror. "..Guys?" The cops walked over to the survivor in the bathtub and handcuffed him. Claudio couldn't let his friends live in jail - even that, prison! He shouted towards the two: "He didn't do anything wrong, it wasn't his fault!"

The cops had continued to mutter the usual 'Used against you in the court of law' nonsense while arresting him. Claudio, in a moment of indescribable fury, grabbed one of their guns and shot them in the head.

He turned to shoot the other one, and Michael attempted to pull back his friend to save him from death. It was too late, however, as Claudio was killed by a single bullet. Even with the revelation of his good friend's death, Michael couldn't fathom what was going on.

KILL COUNT: 5/8 (Claudio)

With the death of five men came the end of a family - A Fam.

Epilogue

Alex was arrested for ten years, and resorted to robotic legs for the rest of his life. He cheated on his wives, eventually killed by one of them once they found it. She strangled him with her purse and fingered his butthole until both his neck and asshole were numb.

KILL COUNT: 6/8 (Alex)

Michael was never the same. As an adult, he raped girls as he never found the meaning of love. He did, however, find the meaning of a bullet to the back of the neck in his last moments of life. It was in these last few seconds that Mike cursed the downy kind.

KILL COUNT: 7/8 (Michael)

Flynn grew to be an old man with a gray, crumbly beard. He eventually settled down with a 35-year old wife, him being 60; She gave him genital herpes, though, and he died shortly after.

KILL COUNT: 8/8 (Flynn)

[ Moral Of The Story? Friendship Doesn't Exist! ]